


as though nothing could fall

by anpm



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Anxiety, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Depression, Dissociation, Drinking, F/F, F/M, Implied Forced Pregnancy, Implied forced bonding, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Kidnapping, M/M, Miscarriage, Past Child Abuse, Rape/Non-con Elements, References to Drugs, Slow Burn, Underage Rape/Non-con, Unethical Medicine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-08 17:07:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 96,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11650998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anpm/pseuds/anpm
Summary: Nathaniel gasps out his breaths as he runs. There’s a stitch in his side that’s so painful he feels nauseous. He’s been running for so long. He has no clue where he is, just that hemustkeep running. It was the last thing his mom screamed at him before she…No. He can’t think about that. He can’t remember the sight of a clawed hand puncturing her chest. Can’t let himself smell the hot metallic blood that splashed over his face. All he can focus on is the last choked scream of his mom telling him torun.an ABO au





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> super self-indulgent ABO fic that literally no one asked for or wanted. i wasn't even going to post this honestly. dunno when i'll update, as i'm super bad at that. this has all the usual warnings an "all for the game" fic has, only extra worse because it's got ABO and riko and that's just a bad combo right? tags for the entire fic are already up, but i'll post a chapter-by-chapter warning and also add if necessary. 
> 
> no andrew in this chapter, because it's a young(er) neil. he'll probably show up next chapter? along with the other players? hopefully. we'll see! also i'm probably grossly wrong about neil's/kevin's+riko's age differences? i thought they were three years apart based on like zero reference material, i literally could not find fucking ages anywhere other than like, neil turns 18 during the locker scene when everyone thinks he's 19? so that implies he's 17 at the start of the books??? and kevin's been in college for one year already and if he started at 18 that means he's 19/20? i literally have no clue just go with it~ but i know andrew is one year older than neil i think? again, zero clue. we'll fucking see how it goes.
> 
> warnings for this chapter: referenced/implied (past) child abuse, implied/referenced (past) rape/non-con (between an older adult female and a child neil), inappropriate and unwanted touching/advances on an underage character, discussion of Omegas as breeding stock, discrimination based on sexual presentation, talk about forced bonding and forced impregnation, implied unethical medical practices

 

 

Nathaniel gasps out his breaths as he runs. There’s a stitch in his side that’s so painful he feels nauseous. He’s been running for so long, dodging in and out of cul-de-sacs and empty neighborhoods. He has no clue where he is, just that he must keep running. It was the last thing his mom screamed at him before she…

No. He can’t think about that. He can’t remember the sight of a clawed hand puncturing her chest. Can’t let himself smell the hot metallic blood that splashed over his face. All he can focus on is the last choked scream of his mom telling him to _run_.

He can’t hear anyone behind him. There hasn’t been any sound of his pursuers in long enough that he can probably hide. Nathaniel is fast, has been running all his life feels like, so he knows how to get away. He might not be as strong or have as much stamina as an Alpha, but if anything about being an Omega has ever worked to his advantage, it’s his instinct for safety. His mom, a Beta, was watchful through repeated exposure to danger and abuse, but she didn’t understand the instinctual, bone-deep need to run and hide when even the faintest whiff of danger cropped up.

Nathaniel stops moving and inhales deeply. There is no scent of the Alphas that were responsible for his mom’s death, no scent of bloodlust or excitement. Just abandonment. This is clearly a neighborhood that’s been left to rot. Nathaniel picks a house with in-tact windows and heads to the back. The sliding glass door is open and he uses his sweater over his hand to shut it so his scent doesn’t linger.

The house smells of mildew and decomposing things. Nathaniel screws up his nose in disgust, but he’s learned that these sorts of smells are good for hiding. Betas are practically nose dead and Alphas don’t have nearly the same sensitivity that Omegas do. Harsh smells can cover up the stink of fear Nathaniel knows is pouring off him. He shouldn’t have run as hard as he did, but he had to get away. Had to run the way his mom told him to. He can only pray to a god he doesn’t believe in that no one would follow him this far.

His father’s men would go to the ends of the earth to find him and drag him back, but he doesn’t think the people who killed his mom were sent by Nathan. He didn’t recognize any of them, and all the times before when they were found, Nathaniel always recognized at least a few people from his father’s employ. No, these were people separate from Nathan. They had to be. But who else cared enough about a Beta and a concealed Omega to come after them? To kill his mom? Had she pissed off more people than just his father? She was always keeping secrets from him, talking to people on phones and in shady places. Had she done something to one of them?

Nathaniel finds a small storage closet under the stairs. The door is swollen shut from water damage, but he manages to force it open and shut it after him. There’s no lock on the inside, but no one should think to find him here. There are damp cardboard boxes that stink up the small cupboard, and that should be good enough to cover his scent. There’s a bare bulb with a chain attached to it, but Nathaniel knows better than to turn it on. The best thing for him to do is push himself next to the stack of moldy cardboard boxes and wait out the rest of the day before figuring out his next move.

He doesn’t have any of his stuff with him—his duffle is still at the house they were squatting in, along with his mom’s binder and their phones. It’s probably better he doesn’t have his phone. But that means all his clothes and emergency rations are gone. He’ll have to go to the next safe location his mom was going to bring them to by himself and get the money she left there. It’s the only way he can survive on his own.

A noise at the front of the house makes Nathaniel freeze. He hunches down and closes his eyes, letting his other senses pick up the slack to tell him what’s going on. It’s hard to tell over the smell of the soggy cardboard, but he picks up the faintest scent of Alpha. It makes his stomach clench.

The noise turns into the front door opening and slamming against the wall. Nathaniel flinches. Nothing good ever comes of slammed doors.

“I know I saw someone come in here,” someone says, not bothering to be quiet about it. He sounds arrogant and excited. Nathaniel can smell that excitement flooding the house. It smells sick and greedy—he doesn’t want to meet the owner of that scent. “Come out, come out, wherever you are,” the person says.

Nathaniel is silent in his cupboard, but knows his heart is racing. It’s probably audible. He smells like fear and sweat and no matter how strong the cardboard is, someone might still be able to smell him.

There’s a second scent, then, anxious, but still discernibly another Alpha. “Come on, Riko. We’re needed elsewhere.” This one sounds like he’s used to being listened to, but Nathaniel can still smell his anxious brand of fear. It’s sour, maybe enough to cover up Nathaniel’s scent.

“Shut up, Day,” the first one says. “I’ve found something sweet to eat.”

Nathaniel tries not to even breathe, tries not to alert them in any way to where he is, but the door to the cupboard wrenches open and the scent of the Alphas fills up the tiny room.

“There you are,” the Alpha says with a grin.

-

As soon as he’s brought outside of the house, Nathaniel tries to bolt. He has to try. It’s his last bid at freedom, probably at life if they decide to deal with him the way they dealt with his mom. The Alpha called Day watches him with wide eyes but the one called Riko tackles him to the ground. He’s still grinning and the look in his eyes makes Nathaniel quiver.

“Ah, ah,” Riko says. “Don’t make me sever a tendon.” He says it so casually, like the act of extreme violence wouldn’t be more than a minor inconvenience for him. It’s the same tone of voice Lola always used when she was practicing on him with her knives.

Nathaniel lifts his chin up and tilts his head to the side, submission given by instinct alone. He knows how to appease Alphas like Riko. He’s been doing it all his life.

Riko leans down immediately and presses his nose to the junction of Nathaniel’s jaw and throat. He inhales deeply enough that Nathaniel can feel his chest expanding and pressing against his own. “Oh,” Riko says, voice gone gravelly. “Even sweeter than I thought under all that Beta stink. Did you roll around in her clothes to cover this up?”

He’s exactly right, but Nathaniel knows better than to say anything.

“You need to follow along and be good, or I won’t hesitate to pluck out those pretty eyes, understand? Omegas don’t need to see to be useful.” Riko says. He licks up Nathaniel’s throat while Nathaniel tries his hardest not to gag. How can someone who looks so close to his age be so unimpressed with the gore he’s threatening?

“I won’t run,” Nathaniel whispers. He will, as soon as he has even a hint at a chance, but Riko doesn’t have to know that.

The Alpha hums a note, licks over Nathaniel’s Adam’s apple. He seems to like whatever combination of fear and discomfort that he can taste off Nathaniel. “I don’t know if I should believe you.”

“Riko,” Day says, clearly uncomfortable. “The Master will be waiting.”

That makes Riko stop. He contemplates Nathaniel for a moment longer before getting up and hauling the Omega after him. “I suppose you’re right. Mustn’t keep Uncle waiting for very much longer. He’ll be oh-so excited with the present we’ve bought him, though.” Riko pushes Nathaniel towards a sleek, black car parked at the curb. He wonders at how he didn’t hear the vehicle pull up while he was hiding, but panic has made him stupid before. Usually, his mom would—

No, stop. Don’t think about that.

Nathaniel is pushed into the back seat and Riko climbs in next to him, Day in the driver’s seat. It gives Riko more opportunity to be unnecessarily handsy in ways that make Nathaniel’s skin crawl. The Alpha reminds him so much of Lola, of the way she stroked his hair or touched his neck when she looked at him, how she always managed to be around when he was fresh out of his baths and no one else would notice him gone. He has no clue what the Alphas wanted of him, but it couldn’t be anything good. Not after what happened to his mom.

“Where have you been hiding?” Riko muses out loud. He’s got a bleached curl wrapped around one finger that he tugs on enough to hurt. “The Beta bitch was nosing around in business that wasn’t hers. She got in the way. But you?” He leans in close, looks between Nathaniel’s eyes rapidly until a smile grows on his face. “I think you’re wearing colored contacts.” It’s a non-sequitur, or sounds like one, but Nathaniel knows better. His blood runs cold at Riko’s words.

“How old are you? What’s your name? When did you present?”

Riko’s rapid hail of questions is too much, too fast. Nathaniel doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know what lies he should tell to keep his secret safe. If Riko’s people had the house they were squatting at, they would know Nathaniel’s current identity, but would Riko know it already? Know it for the lie it was? An expensive one, but one that could be figured out.

“We’re here,” Day says, breaking Nathaniel’s inner panic. Riko gives him one last lingering look before leaving the car and dragging Nathaniel after him.

The warehouse isn’t much of a surprise, not if his mom was getting into the business of people who dealt slights with death. Nor were the Alphas and Betas roaming around with automatic weapons and dark suits. They all turn to face Riko when he exits the vehicle, nodding respectfully to him and, surprisingly, Day when he stepped next to them. Nathaniel can’t help but shiver at the feel of all those eyes on him, curious and _looking_. He smelled more like Riko and Day than his mom’s soothing Beta scent, but they had to smell his own Omega fear under it.

Riko brings the three of them to an office at the top of a staircase. It overlooked what on a quick glance Nathaniel could tell was a process of some sort of drugs. He quickly averts his eyes, not wanting to see more than he already has. There’s an Alpha outside the office door, but he lets Riko pass without a word.

“I see you’re back from your little adventure,” the man sitting behind the desk says dryly. He looked like Riko, but older, and was clearly an Alpha from his scent. His voice was quiet, but he sounded like the sort of man who was obeyed with only one order. Nathaniel didn’t like how much he reminded him of his father. “What have you brought?”

“Something interesting,” Riko says. “The Beta had a pup with her. An Omega.”

The man’s face doesn’t change, but Nathaniel can smell the hint of interest from him. He stands and rounds the desk, coming towards them. Riko and Day step away and Nathaniel wants to as well, but he knows better. Not with three unknown Alphas trapping him in a very small room with nowhere to run.

“Your name,” the man says.

Nathaniel stays silent. He isn’t prepared for the backhand to his cheek and ends up sprawled at the man’s feet. It didn’t hurt that badly—he’s had far worse—but the surprise makes him clutch at his face.

“You will speak when spoken to,” the man tells him dispassionately. He motions at Riko. “Take off his shirt. I need to see something.”

His words make Nathaniel panic again and he immediately starts to struggle when Riko bends down to grab at him. “No!” he shouts, kicking and scratching at the Alpha. Riko curses and grabs his hands, slamming them down on the floor hard enough that Nathaniel cries out. It feels like the right one might have broken.

“Stop struggling or I’ll break them both,” Riko hisses.

The fight is drained out of Nathaniel at that and he sobs out a breath when Riko grabs the hem of his shirt and pulls it up viciously. There are so many scars on his torso, so many reminders he doesn’t want to face, doesn’t want anyone to see. He squeezes his eyes shut and cradles his hand to his chest.

“The Wesninski whelp,” the man finally says. Nathaniel’s eyes fly open and he gapes up at him, pure terror thrumming through his body. “The Butcher described these wounds, told us he and the Beta would be disguised, but this was something they couldn’t hide.” He gives Nathaniel a cold once-over, as though satisfied with his conclusion. “The Butcher will be pleased he’s been located and his debt can finally be paid.”

“ _Nathaniel_ ,” Riko breathes, eyes wide and mouth curved up in glee. “This is Nathaniel Wesninski? The Omega that was supposed to come to the Castle when he presented?” He sounds almost giddy. It’s more unsettling than the older man’s cool aloofness.

“One in the same.”

Nathaniel has no clue what they’re talking about—what debt his father owed or what Castle Riko is talking about—but nothing good could come of people who knew his father, knew what he did, who Nathaniel really was.

The man looks down at Nathaniel one last time before going back to his desk. “My name is Tetsuji Moriyama. You father owed my family a debt and paid with you. You belong to me, and by extension, to my nephew. I am your Master. I will not be disobeyed. You will serve your purpose, or you will die. Is this understood?” Tetsuji sounded almost bored.

When Nathaniel didn’t answer quickly enough, Riko reaches out and grabs his hurt wrist, squeezing until Nathaniel lets out a reedy noise. “Answer him,” he growls.

“Understood,” Nathaniel whispers. He feels light-headed and ready to pass out from the agony in his wrist and the demands that have been put on his body and mind in so short a span of time.

Tetsuji waves his hand in what is a clear dismissal and doesn’t blink when Riko hauls Nathaniel up by his wrist. Nor did he seem to notice Nathaniel’s choked-off gasp and the ashen color he goes at the pain.

“He’s yours to do with as you please, Riko. Take him elsewhere.” Tetsuji went back to the laptop on his desk.

“Of course, Uncle.”

“Master,” Day murmurs.

Riko pushes and shoves him down the staircase and out of the warehouse, back to the car. When he gets in, he takes the driver’s seat and Day the passenger. Nathaniel huddles up in the back, trying not to put any pressure on his wrist but knowing nothing could be done unless it was splinted or wrapped.

“Oh, Nathaniel,” Riko says, meeting Nathaniel’s eyes in the rearview mirror. “I was right. You are a sweet treat, just for me.”

-

Riko drives them all in the car for a few hours away from Tetsuji. Nathaniel spends the time trying to rest and not think about his throbbing wrist. Thinking about pain never made it feel any less terrible. He watches the scenery pass outside the window and ignores Riko and Day talking to each other up front.

Well, Riko is the one who speaks the most. Day is quieter. He doesn’t smell as much like anxiety as he did before, but he still smells unhappy. Nathaniel wonders what he has to be upset about. He wasn’t the one who had his mom killed and his freedom taken in one day.

He’s been trying not to think about her, either. She wasn’t always a good mom and her lessons were usually as violent as his father’s. But she protected him, kept him safe and away from Nathan for as long as she could. Neither of them had been under any illusions about how long they would be able to survive on the run. They both figured they would die within a few years, but Nathaniel never thought his mom would go first. She was too smart for that and he was the one who was careless.

He was certainly careless enough to get caught.

They pass through wrought iron gates to an estate that looms dark and brooding on top of a hill. There are black metal ravens on top of the gate and it says _Evermore_ on a bronze plaque next to the gate. The word sparks a feeling of recognition in Nathaniel’s memory, but he doesn’t quite know what it is. Maybe something his mom had said, when he was younger? It niggles like a loose tooth, the familiar sound of the word. He’s distracted from his thoughts by Riko’s chuckle from the front seat.

“I can’t believe we were lucky enough to find you again after so long,” he says. Nathaniel isn’t sure if Riko’s talking to him, or just musing aloud. “I was always told you would come to us eventually, but when that Beta woman stole you away, we thought you’d be gone forever. Especially after the Butcher decided to cut his losses on you.”

Nathaniel shudders at his father’s moniker being spoken again. How does Riko even know who his father is? Riko and Tetsuji both spoke of him as if he was a personal acquaintance. That can’t bode well for Nathaniel. People who know who his father is, who speak of him so casually, are never safe for Nathaniel to be around.

“We have so much missed time to make up for,” Riko continues as they pull into a circular driveway. There are more men in suits standing outside the dark, looming mansion, but they aren’t holding guns in their hands like at the warehouse. Nathaniel has no doubt they’re armed, though. Riko turns around and looks at Nathaniel with a smile that sends chills up his spine. “We’ll have to get started right away.”

-

Unsurprisingly, Riko doesn’t take Nathaniel to see someone about his wrist. He shows Nathaniel around what he proudly calls _Castle Evermore_ and tells him about all the places he never expects to see him.

“You’ll have a room next to mine, of course. Day is right down the hall, so don’t think of trying to sneak out past him. There’s always security walking around, so you won’t be able to get out, but Day and I are more than enough to take you down if need be,” Riko says. He has a nonchalant air about him as he talks, like he’s used to having his commands obeyed without question. Day doesn’t say anything to contradict him, so Nathaniel figures he is.

“The Butcher promised you to us when you presented, but that Beta bitch ran away with you, right? Thought you were too good for the likes of me?” Riko turns and corners Nathaniel against the wall, looks down at him with narrowed eyes. “Is that why she ran with you? Didn’t want you to have to bend over to someone she didn’t choose for you? Surely, she didn’t think you could get away for long. Not with the Butcher after you.”

Nathaniel presses back against the wall, trying to get away from Riko and his Alpha scent and the way he’s looking at him. “I—I don’t know why we ran. She just woke me up one night and put me in the car and we’ve been running ever since.”

Riko searches his face for a long time. “Well, you won’t be running anymore. And you won’t keep this atrocious disguise on, either. No more contacts, no more ugly bleach. You’ll wash the stink of that Beta off you. I won’t have it.” He finally steps back and Nathaniel can breathe again. “I think that’s the first thing we’ll take care of. I’m tired of smelling her on you.”

They go to a room that’s darkly furnished with a huge bed in the center. Day hesitates on the threshold after Riko pushes Nathaniel towards a door on the other side of the room.

“What are you still doing here?” Riko asks, not even turning to look at Day. “Don’t you have something else to do?” Day gives Nathaniel a searching look and the smell of his anxiousness gets sharper. Riko snorts. “Fuck’s sake, Day. Get out of here. I don’t need you for this.”

Nathaniel doesn’t know what “this” is, but it probably won’t be anything good for him. He wants Day to stay, even though he doesn’t want to be stuck in another room with two alphas. Day seems more afraid to do anything than most Alphas Nathaniel has known.

“ _Out_ ,” Riko snarls, finally turning to flash his teeth at Day. Day flinches and turns, leaving the doorway quickly. Riko stalks over and slams the door shut, grumbling about idiots who have no sense. Riko grabs the back of Nathaniel’s neck and pushes him to the other door, opening it and revealing a bathroom.

It’s a nice bathroom, with a huge marble sink and a shower hidden by a glass door. There’s white tile on the floor and walls with black ravens inlaid. Off to the side is a huge claw-foot tub.

“A shower would be quicker, but you seem the type to enjoy being pampered.” Riko steers Nathaniel to the tub. “Get undressed,” he says and drops his hand from the back of Nathaniel’s neck.

Nathaniel stares at the tub, then looks back at Riko. “Can…in front of you?”

Riko sneers. “You’ll have to get much more comfortable around me, Nathaniel. Might as well start now. Take your clothes off.”

There’s never been a time Nathaniel has been comfortable being naked around others. Even his mom averted her eyes when they had to change in close quarters. She didn’t like to look at the evidence of Nathan’s abuse any more than Nathaniel did. Nathaniel held physical reminders of their time under the Butcher’s rule that his mom didn’t—she was a Beta and produced a male heir the way she was supposed to. It wasn’t her fault Nathaniel was an Omega and not an Alpha the way Nathan expected. Nathan hated his “freak” son and wasn’t afraid to show it with knives and fists and once, an iron.

But Riko doesn’t leave very much room for argument. Nathaniel struggles to undress with his throbbing wrist. After a few minutes of watching him fight his clothes, Riko clicks his tongue and slaps Nathaniel’s hand away.

“I hope you’re not always this useless,” he says as he tugs Nathaniel’s shirt off and works on his jeans. “I won’t always be here to do things for you, you know.”

Nathaniel’s stomach clenches at Riko’s words. They echo things his mom used to say to him all the time, when he failed at some simple task or another she set out for him. “Sorry,” he mumbles, looking down at the tiled floor and not Riko’s scowling face.

He toes off his worn shoes when his jeans fall slack, then bends down to take off his socks one handed. He’s left in just his boxers and Riko gives him a look and reaches around to turn on the taps for the tub. There’s a stopper on a chain that he puts in the drain before moving over to a cabinet next to the sink.

“Get in,” he says brusquely.

For just a moment, Nathaniel considers keeping his boxers on when he climbs into the tub, but he doesn’t think Riko would appreciate it. He’s learned, over the years, what’s necessary to keep punishments at bay. Risking Riko’s anger when he’s already hurt and vulnerable isn’t the wisest choice. He slips his boxers off and climbs into the tub, wincing at the heat as he sinks down.

The hot water quickly relaxes his tense muscles, though. He keeps his injured wrist up and out of the water, unsure if it would be bad to expose it to heat. Nathaniel no longer thinks it’s broken—he’s broken bones before and knows how it feels when they go untreated for too long. This feels more like a bad sprain, with bruising and swelling that makes his wrist look a bit grotesque.

Riko comes back just as the water hits Nathaniel’s chest. He turns it off and drags a stool to the side of the tub to sit down on. There are a few bottles of toiletries tucked under one arm. He stares at Nathaniel where he’s huddled at the end of the tub, knees pressed to his chest and tucked under his chin.

“I remember seeing a picture of you from before the Beta took you,” Riko says suddenly. Nathaniel hates the way he says _the Beta_ , like his mom was something dirty. “Is your hair still auburn? I’m sure your eyes are still just as blue under those contacts. You looked remarkably like your father in that picture.”

Nathaniel winces at the reminder. He hates looking so much like his father—he can see Nathan in every mirror he looks into. His mom sometimes struggled to look at him if he didn’t have his contacts in or if his hair was as close to its natural shade as she ever let it get. Riko tracks the flinch with his head cocked.

“Take out the contacts first,” he says.

It’s never been safe to not have them in unless he’s sleeping, but he’s had the contacts in all day and his eyes feel dry and irritated. It’ll be a relief to have them out, even if it means Riko can see him. He takes them out and puts them into Riko’s outstretched hand, sure he’ll never see another pair of brown contacts as long as he lives. However long that might be.

Riko shakes his hand over the floor until the contacts are gone, then reaches over to grab Nathaniel’s chin, tilting his face back and forth. “A marked improvement,” he murmurs. “We’ll have to do something about your hair later. I’m loathe to look at it any longer than I have to.” Nathaniel would point out that Riko _doesn’t_ have to look at him at all, but his smart mouth has gotten him into trouble enough times before that he knows better than to say it. “Regardless,” Riko continues, “this should work to get that Beta stink off you.”

He picks up one of the bottles from before and uncaps it, pouring some thick body wash into his cupped palm. It doesn’t smell like any of the soaps his mom used to buy; the thick, cloying scents that would block out his natural Omega smell, or the Beta formulated washes that made him smell just like his mom. This smells like nothing, which isn’t actually a relief.

“Turn to face me, and put your legs down for fuck’s sake,” Riko says. Nathaniel does as he’s told and Riko nods. He lathers the soap between his hands and then puts them on Nathaniel’s shoulders. It’s not a touch Nathaniel is comfortable with, he doesn’t _like_ to be touched, but he knows better than to shy back from it.

The way Riko smooths his hands down Nathaniel’s arms and over his chest reminds him too much of Lola. The way she used to follow him wherever he went, the way she always touched him when no one else was watching. She was another Alpha whose casual cruelty Nathaniel learned to fear. She didn’t take no or tears or his fear as an answer as much as she relished in them.

“It’s really too bad that others have been here before me.” Riko traces a hand over the iron burn, across the bullet hole and a few other raised scars from various knives. “I don’t like when others touch what’s mine.”

“Yours?” Nathaniel can’t help but ask. Tetsuji had something like that, too. About belonging to him, about Tetsuji being his _Master_.

Riko smiles and it’s not a kind expression. “You really don’t know? The reason the Beta took you and ran off?”

Nathaniel shakes his head. “She never said.”

“The Butcher works for my family, the Moriyamas. He’s our leashed killer. But he owed us a debt and when he admitted you were an Omega and not the Alpha everyone assumed you’d be, you became the repayment. Omegas are worth a lot, breeding Omegas are worth even more. You were promised to this branch of the Moriyamas, to _me_. That’s who you belong to. But then your bitch of a mother took you, five million dollars, and ran. Your father has been desperate to get you and the money back since then, to pay his debt to us.”

Riko cups Nathaniel’s face in his soapy hands, rubs his thumbs over his cheekbones. “I was very disappointed when you didn’t appear at my side the way you were supposed to four years ago. I had so many plans for you.” He smiles again, that same unkind slash across his face. “But now you’re here.”

Despite the hot water, Nathaniel feels cold. He’s heard people talk about Omegas like they’re nothing more than breeding stock, of course, but he’s never heard it applied to him. Maybe his father had said something about not needing a useless breeding bitch for a son when he was particularly mad at him, but nothing about selling him off to pay a debt because of his secondary gender status.

They’d known since he was 10, of course. The same time everyone else was tested for their biological gender. His father had stated for a fact Nathaniel would be an Alpha—with an Alpha father and a Beta mom who came from Alphas, it was guaranteed. But when Mary’s face became white and frightened from the printed results, Nathaniel knew it wasn’t good news. The beating that night had removed any doubts he might have had that Omegas were worth less than dirt in his father’s eyes.

Since his mom had taken him, no one had ever thought of him as anything but another Beta—his mom did her best to disguise his scent and the moment anyone looked at him twice they were gone to their next location. He’d also not had his first heat, so there was no reason for anyone to bother with him.

The look of hunger and interest on Riko’s face said he was more than willing to make up for all that lack of interest from others.

“As I said, it’s a pity someone else has marked you before I could,” Riko says absently. He stops touching Nathaniel’s face to stroke over one ropey scar that cuts across Nathaniel’s collarbone. “Maybe if you’d come straight to me instead of letting that Beta drag you across the world for no good reason.”

He says it like any of this was ever Nathaniel’s choice—his scars or his mom running with him. He doesn’t say anything though; he gets the feeling Riko isn’t actually trying to have a conversation with him. Maybe he just likes the sound of his own voice.

“No matter,” Riko continues. “We have plenty of time for fun.”

They’re interrupted by a knock on the door that makes Riko frown. “What could possibly be important enough to interrupt me?” he snarls out. Nathaniel flinches instinctively from the smell of rage that floods the bathroom.

Whoever is at the door hesitates before speaking. “The Lord is on the phone for you,” a male voice says. He sounds apologetic and Nathaniel can’t smell any other Alpha aggression, so he assumes they’re a Beta.

Riko frowns and takes his hands from Nathaniel completely. “Finish here then go to the room directly next door. There will be clothing waiting for you.” He gets up and leaves before Nathaniel can ask about his hand. It’s probably for the best.

Nathaniel takes his time in the bath, washing the suds off of his body from Riko’s roving touches and then washing his hair one-handed. It’s a struggle not to move his right hand, but he’s had more than enough practice being careful with his injuries before. There’s a towel sitting on a shelf beside the sink, so after Nathaniel unplugs the tub and lets it drain, he stands and goes to fetch it. He leaves a trail of water that he makes sure to clean up before drying off completely. He wraps the damp towel around himself and ventures into the room he assumes is Riko’s—he can’t imagine the Alpha letting Nathaniel bathe anywhere other than his own bathroom with all the talk about Nathaniel being his.

There’s a set of clothes laid on the bed that Nathaniel hesitantly picks at. Black briefs, shorts and shirt. Unsurprising with the décor of Riko’s room. Nathaniel is less than pleased at the short sleeves, but it’s warm in the manor. He has a feeling Riko wouldn’t care to hear Nathaniel’s preferences on clothing length anyway. He dresses carefully and then leaves the room.

The hallway is empty when Nathaniel steps into it, but he doesn’t feel safe from scrutiny. There’s the room directly next door that Riko ordered him to go to, and down the hall is Day’s room, but there don’t seem to be any other rooms in the hallway. He could run, he remembers the tour Riko gave him. There would be people, probably with guns, but Nathaniel has been running from people with guns for years, now. He might be able to make it back to the front door, out past the gate and back towards freedom. All he has to do—

But there’s nothing to run _to_ , is there? His mom is dead, his father knows where he is. These people know exactly _who_ he was. Could he escape, run by himself and keep running? Figure out how to get to his mom’s next stash and buy a new identity for himself? Or would he just be running from twice as many people as before? Would it be worth it, to run from his father _and_ the Moriyamas? How long would he make it until he was caught again?

Nathaniel doesn’t know how long he stands there in Riko’s doorway, contemplating what he should do, before the other door down the hall opens and Day steps out. He looks startled to see Nathaniel in the hallway and he frowns, hesitating at his own door.

“You should be in your room,” he says finally. There’s disapproval in his voice, a hint of nervousness as he looks around the hallway to confirm that no one else is there. Nathaniel wonders if he can smell the subtle emotions on himself the way Nathaniel can.

There’s a snide remark on the tip of Nathaniel’s tongue, something that would probably make the Alpha’s frown deepen, but Nathaniel knows better than to let the pain in his body react for him. He bites his tongue instead and goes to the door next to Riko’s. He notices the lock on the outside that looks recently installed. It doesn’t make him feel any better about the whole situation.

Day steps away from his door, finally, and makes an aborted movement towards Nathaniel. He stops when Nathaniel flinches away. “Just…do what he says, alright? Don’t make him angry,” he says.

“He doesn’t have to be angry to hurt me,” Nathaniel says before he can stop himself. Day’s eyes flick down to the still swollen wrist that Nathaniel has been cradling against himself and the unhappy look on his face worsens.

“Go to your room, Nathaniel,” is all he says after a long pause.

Nathaniel does, but only because it looks like Day will stand there until he listens.

-

Riko doesn’t come back for him at all that day. Someone comes up hours after Nathaniel enters his new bedroom and brings him dinner. It’s a Beta woman who doesn’t look at him as she sets his tray down. He’s had nothing to do but sit on his bed and stare at the blank walls since he first came in, so anything new has his interest instantly.

The woman doesn’t look a thing like his mom—she’s tall and black—but she smells enough like his mom’s base Beta scent that Nathaniel can’t help but relax a bit. He’s surprised Riko let another female Beta anywhere near him, but maybe she was supposed to be some sort of comfort to Nathaniel after all the events of the day.

“My name is Thea,” the woman says. Her voice is devoid of emotion and when she looks at Nathaniel, it’s at a point over his shoulder instead of his eyes. “If you need anything, you will let me know.” She doesn’t sound a thing like the ‘help’ his father had around the house back in Baltimore. Nathaniel guesses she’s probably far more dangerous than the maids his father used to employ, judging by the bulging muscles in Thea’s arms when she shifts at his silence. “Is there anything?”

Nathaniel motions to his right wrist resting on a pillow in his lap. “I need a splint for this,” he says quietly. He’s not sure if Thea will actually do anything about it. She just said Nathaniel would let her know, not that she would take care of his needs.

Thea glances at his hand and frowns a bit. “You will eat everything on your tray,” she says instead of answering his request. “You’ll need to be in much better health.” She doesn’t say for what, but the words are still ominous enough. Thea leaves without another word and Nathaniel hears the faint click of the lock engaging.

The door wasn’t locked, before, but he doesn’t feel _more_ trapped than when he could open it himself. He’s had hours to think about his situation, and he knows how stupid and futile it would be to run from his room into the unknown territory of the manor. Riko might have given him a tour, but that doesn’t mean Nathaniel knows where people usually are, or what doors would be locked from him. He can run when he knew more about the house and the movements of the staff within.

He’s hungry and the food on the tray smells good, but Nathaniel doesn’t actually want to eat. He can hear his mom’s voice reprimanding him for not eating when he has the opportunity, but it doesn’t feel safe to eat what’s been provided for him. If someone’s drugged it or even put poison in it, he’d never know until it was too late.

His wrist has been throbbing nonstop for hours, but the pain keeps Nathaniel awake and sharp. He’s exhausted, from the morning and from his own aches and thoughts, but the pain keeps him present. It doesn’t feel safe to sleep, either.

There’s a knock at the door that jerks him out of his own thoughts. Nathaniel frowns and looks at it, wondering if the person on the other side really is waiting on him to say something, or if they’re just being courteous. Before he can decide on what to do, the person enters the room.

It’s only slightly a surprise when it turns out to be Day.

“Nathaniel,” he says softly. He glances over his shoulder and then comes into the room, keeping the door slightly cracked open after himself. “Thea said no one had come to see about your hand.” He sounds awkward and unsure, but there’s a medical pack in his hands that Nathaniel is keener on than whatever Day has to say to him.

Day takes a look around the room, noting the distinct lack of anything other than a small bed and a dresser filled with clothing that Nathaniel has already rifled through. He makes a face at the uneaten tray of food, but doesn’t say anything about it as he comes to sit next to Nathaniel on the bed and holds out a hand.

“Jean is much better at this than I am, but he’s…unavailable,” Day says as he turns Nathaniel’s hand this way and that to look at the bruised and swollen skin. Nathaniel doesn’t remind Day that he has no clue who Jean is, let alone care that he’s apparently busy. “Riko doesn’t…he doesn’t mean to do things like this. His temper just gets the better of him, sometimes.” Day opens the med kit and brings out a roll of ace bandages. “This should be fine, I don’t think it’s bruised too badly.”

“Nice to know you’re a medical professional,” Nathaniel says before he can stop himself. He bites his lip quickly, but it’s already out and he’s preparing himself to be hit.

Day huffs out what sounds like it could be a laugh and continues to wrap Nathaniel’s wrist. “You’re going to get yourself in trouble if you talk like that to him,” he says softly. When Nathaniel’s wrist is completely wrapped, tight and stiff to keep him from moving it, he holds onto Nathaniel’s hand and looks at him. His expression is earnest and Nathaniel isn’t used to seeing that on Alphas. “I’m not your enemy here,” he says. “I know you didn’t…choose…to be with us, but that doesn’t mean you can’t think of me as a friend.”

Nathaniel takes his hand back and doesn’t miss the hurt look that flashes across Day’s face. “I don’t even know who you are. You helped some psycho kidnap me and lock me up in this weird house where I don’t even know what’s going to happen to me, and I can’t leave. Why would I be your _friend_?”

The concept of friendship is an unknown one to Nathaniel—even if he was inclined to be friendly towards Day, he’s never had _friends_. His mom told him friendship was a weakness to be exploited. There was no need in Nathaniel’s life for friends or lovers, not when they had to constantly be on the run in order to be safe. There was no time for anything other than each other and keeping ahead of his father.

Day looks a little hurt, but he doesn’t lash out at Nathaniel. “I get that, I really do. But you need someone here who cares about your wellbeing. You can’t isolate yourself from people trying to reach out to you.” Nathaniel continues to give him a blank look and Day shakes his head. “You don’t trust me, I get that.” He looks back at the door that’s still cracked just a bit. “You don’t have to, not right now. I hope you do, but I won’t push.” He looks back at Nathaniel and smiles. It looks crooked on his face, like he doesn’t do it very often, and it makes him look younger. “I have to go, but I’ll try to stop in on you, see how you’re doing, as much as I can, alright?”

“You’re free to do what you want,” Nathaniel says with no little bitterness.

Day’s smile wavers the slightest bit. He gets up and goes to the door but hesitates before he leaves completely. “My name’s Kevin, by the way,” he says carefully. “See you, Nathaniel.”

He leaves and Nathaniel hears the sound of the lock clicking after him.

-

Nathaniel spends the next few days locked in his new room with absolutely nothing to do. Thea comes in and brings him food and takes his dirty clothes away. She never has anything to say to him unless he asks for something, and even then, she usually just gives him a look and doesn’t confirm anything. He can’t tell if the Beta dislikes him or is just surly by nature.

Two days after Riko picked him up, a Beta male comes for him and brings him to a bigger bathroom on the first floor. There’s a chair waiting for Nathaniel and an array of hair products and dyes on the counter. Nathaniel is used to the procedure of dyeing his hair, but not to people other than him or his mom doing it.

He’s not used to the way the Beta carefully puts the dye through his hair, either. His mom usually just pulled a comb through his hair until everything looked covered and then shoved his head under the sink faucet. The Beta takes his time making sure everything is right before he finally washes the dye out of Nathaniel’s hair. Then he picks up scissors and cuts the raggedy mop Nathaniel had been sporting for the past few months.

When the Beta holds up a mirror for Nathaniel to look at himself in, he flinches back automatically. His hair is back to his natural shade, and the cut puts his bright blue eyes on display. If not for the darker color of his skin thanks to his mom, it would be just like looking at his father. The similarities are too much, as it is.

He goes back to his room and is thankful for the isolation and lack of mirrors to look at himself in. He doesn’t _want_ other people to look at him and see his father’s features. He’s slight and short like his mom’s family, but he still looks too much like Nathan to bear looking.

The days are long and boring without anything to do, but Nathaniel knows how much worse they could be. He has a lot of time to remember his father’s house in Baltimore; the mini-mansion that looked like it came straight from a magazine on the outside, but had layers of rot underneath. His new bedroom is dark and it reminds Nathaniel of how black the basement always was. With nothing to do but lie in bed and remember, Nathaniel thinks of Nathan’s dark furies and Lola’s manic grins whenever Nathaniel fucked up enough to deserve punishment. It didn’t ever take very much—Nathan had a short temper and the very slightest thing would set him off. Nathaniel was just the easiest target to take it out on when at the house.

Nathaniel wonders if it will be the same here, but so far no one has come to him with any ill-intent. Other than the first day, Riko hasn’t even made an appearance. The wrap comes off of Nathaniel’s wrist, and although it’s sore and still bruised, it’s functional and won’t need too much longer to heal.

He’s contemplating whether he should do wrist exercises when Kevin comes into his bedroom. It’s unusual for him to come any time other than at night, when the house has quieted down. He looks nervous, which isn’t actually that unusual, now that Nathaniel has had to get to know the Alpha better.

Kevin sits down on the bed and wrings his hands together. It’s a nervous habit Nathaniel has noticed him doing, and it always makes him look like a rodent washing its hands. Nathaniel would point that out, but Kevin doesn’t seem to be in the laughing mood at the moment.

“Riko’s coming back tonight,” Kevin blurts out. His eyes dart to the slightly-open door and then back to Nathaniel. “He’s been away on business, but he’ll be back. He’s expecting you to be ready for him.”

The words sent chills down Nathaniel’s spine. “Ready how?”

Kevin looks over at the door again. “Riko has expectations for you, you know that right?”

“What sort?” He knows the answer to that, of course, but he doesn’t want to think it.

“You know,” Kevin repeats. “He talked to you about your place here, didn’t he? That’s what he said when we discussed it.” He sounds slightly annoyed, but Nathaniel knows now that’s how he always sounds when he has to repeat things he thinks someone should already know. He’s not actually mad at Nathaniel.

“Riko said—”

“Don’t call him that, not while he’s here. He won’t like that.”

“Okay. He asked about my presentation once, but I wasn’t able to tell him I haven’t had my first heat yet.”

Kevin looks pained at this admission. “You _what_? God above.”

Nathaniel glances away, weirdly ashamed. “Mom said it was normal, because of the way we lived and the suppressants—”

Kevin suddenly reaches out and grasps Nathaniel’s chin, ignoring his flinch. “Have you told anyone else about that?” Nathaniel shakes his head and Kevin’s shoulders drop. “Maybe I can get—”

“Kevin. How good to see you, here in Nathaniel’s room.” Riko is leaning casually against the doorframe of the room, but he looks anything but. There’s suspicion written in every line of his face and Nathaniel gulps.

Kevin flinches away from Nathaniel, hand dropping to his side. “Riko,” he says quickly. “I was checking on the progress of Nathaniel’s health. I’m told the nutrition plan we have him on is designed to make up for his poor childhood.”

Nathaniel can smell the faintest scent of fear from Kevin as well as the dwindling anger from Riko. It seems the excuse worked.

Riko uncrosses his arms and comes into the room proper. He shoots Kevin a look that has the Alpha hurrying to the door to take his place. “I don’t remember asking you to check on that. I’m updated on Nathaniel’s progress frequently.”

That doesn’t make Nathaniel feel secure, but it does confirm his suspicions about being remotely monitored. It’s good he didn’t try to escape after all. The thought of Riko watching his every move, even when he isn’t in Castle Evermore, is chilling.

“But I guess it’s good to know you have a vested interest in Nathaniel’s health,” Riko continues. He reaches out and cradles Nathaniel’s left cheek, rubs his thumb over the bone while Nathaniel tries not to physically recoil. “He’s so important to my plans and it’ll be your job to watch him when he’s with pup.”

Nathaniel shoots Kevin a look and isn’t surprised to see the brief flash of horror written on the Alpha’s face. It’s wiped away quickly but he needn’t have bothered since Riko only has eyes for Nathaniel.

“With pup?” Nathaniel ventures to ask.

Riko smiles and taps Nathaniel’s cheek. “As soon as the doctors approve. It’s important to start building my legacy now. You’ll be even more intoxicating full up from me. Aren’t you happy you’ll be fulfilling your purpose?”

Nathaniel must hesitate for too long because Riko’s smile disappears. He slides his fingers up into Nathaniel’s hair and grips it tight enough to sting.

“You were kept alive for one reason, and one reason alone, Nathaniel,” Riko says. His voice is ice cold and pitched low. “Your whole existence is to further _my_ line. To give me the prestige due. Once you’re with child, father will have to—”

Riko cuts himself off from whatever thread he was going down. He shoots Kevin another look that has him scurrying from the room, door quickly pulled shut behind him.

“There’s no reason you need to know about that. You were born for me, to do whatever I wish, and that’s all that should matter to you. You want to please me, don’t you Nathaniel? You want to make me happy?”

The look on Riko’s face is hard for Nathaniel to figure out. His father never looked at Nathaniel like that—with need and what could be desperation. His mom certainly never looked at Nathaniel as if he held the answers to some infinite problem she was trying to solve. No one has ever looked at him as anything more than a burden at best or a waste of space at worst.  But there’s something else in Riko’s expression that makes Nathaniel’s stomach twist sickly.

“Yes,” he says quickly, watching as the smile spreads across Riko’s face again. “I want to make you happy.”

He has a feeling that’s the only way he’ll be able to survive.

-

It starts simply, at first. Riko brings Nathaniel to his room and they share meals together, Riko talking about his day and his schedule and whatever else happens to catch his interest. Nathaniel would think it’s some weird form of courting, but Riko doesn’t seem to care if Nathaniel talks. Seems to prefer otherwise, in fact. Riko spends the time he’s not talking about himself feeding Nathaniel off his own plate and watching with satisfaction when Nathaniel doesn’t try to object.

He likes feeding Nathaniel sweets, brings them by his room throughout the day and stares at the way Nathaniel eats them. Nathaniel doesn’t have the courage to tell him he doesn’t like sweets, that they make him want to gag with their cloying flavor. He doesn’t think Riko would care for his preferences.

Riko moves on to more physical things, quickly enough. He likes to watch Nathaniel take a bath, helping him wash his hair or clean his back. He smiles indulgently at Nathaniel when he says he’s fine with showers.

“Maybe when you were with that woman,” Riko says, running his fingers through Nathaniel’s curls, ostensibly to shampoo them, but Nathaniel knows Riko likes touching his hair. “But my guess is you were far more used to being pampered at home, weren’t you? I’ve been to the Butcher’s house in Baltimore. Very extravagant. You had free reign of the whole thing, didn’t you?”

Nathaniel doesn’t disabuse him of the notion. He never had free anything in his father’s house. If Nathan wasn’t in one of his black moods, he had either business associates over or the mostly legitimate elite of Baltimore that he wanted to impress. There was no room for Nathaniel. If he disrupted his father’s plans in any way, he was punished. Even his mom couldn’t do more than convince Nathan it was better to have Nathaniel stay in her rooms, to keep him out of trouble.

His father had never raised a hand to his mom, not that Nathaniel ever remembers seeing. He always thought it was because of the Hatford family—Nathan wouldn’t want to risk angering them and bringing down their wrath. But Nathaniel didn’t belong to them; he belonged to Nathan. No one could truly keep him safe from his father. He suspected the Hatfords didn’t want the stress of an Omega to deal with, which is why they kept their distance after he was tested and after his mom took him and ran.

He’d always wondered why she hadn’t just run back to her family and taken him with her, but it makes sense that they wouldn’t want him. It wasn’t legal to outright own Omegas anymore, but their legal status was still tricky and usually defaulted to the Alpha mate or parent. Nathan would have been within his rights to demand the British government turn Nathaniel over to him and the Hatfords wouldn’t have wanted to deal with that headache, he’s sure.

If his mom had left him to Nathan and gone back to England, she would have been safe, Nathaniel knows. His father would have been furious over Mary leaving, but he would have still had Nathaniel, and he could always find another wife. Lola probably would have offered herself at the first opportunity. If Nathaniel was already promised away, then Nathan would have been fine with just keeping his useless Omega son while his wife went back home.

Instead, she took Nathaniel after he was tested and a not inconsiderate amount of money, and they both ran. Not that it did any of them any good, clearly. Maybe it really _would_ have been better if Nathaniel had just gone to Riko the way he was supposed to in the first place. He wasn’t so bad, even if he tended towards a little creepy and didn’t like keeping his hands to himself. Nathaniel had dealt with both those things his whole life.

Of course, things could never quite stay the way Nathaniel hoped.

“Move up,” Riko says, pushing at Nathaniel’s back when he’s in the tub again one day. Nathaniel moves to the middle of the tub and watches Riko curiously. It’s a departure from their regular interaction and deviations always tend to make Nathaniel nervous. He got his paranoia from his mom after all, but paranoia kept them safe right up until the moment it didn’t.

Riko strips his own clothes off and Nathaniel looks away quickly. His stomach feels queasy again and he thinks back to the few times he showed interest in either of the different genders. He can almost feel his mom’s fingers wrenching out his hair, nails leaving scratches like claw marks on his arms and back. The way she would shake him until he felt dizzy enough to throw up. The revulsion she created in him at even the thought of physical intimacy, let alone emotional.

Not that Riko picks up on any of Nathaniel’s turmoil. He’s been told before that Alphas are nose dead to emotions and Nathaniel believes it. Unless Riko just enjoys the sour stench of terror, he must be nose dead.

The water sloshes against the sides of the tub when Riko slides in behind Nathaniel. It goes up from his midsection to his chest and Nathaniel tries to concentrate on the lick of warm water against his cold skin to keep from thinking about why Riko is suddenly sharing his bath.

“Come on,” Riko murmurs. He wraps his arms around Nathaniel’s stomach and pulls him closer until Nathaniel is pressed between his legs, back against his firm chest. “That’s not so bad, is it?” Riko’s breath against his neck makes Nathaniel shiver. He pulls his legs in closer, but Riko still has his arms wrapped around his stomach. The touch makes Nathaniel’s skin crawl.

“You’re reluctant to touch me, which is understandable. That woman took you away during prime contact years. You should have gotten used to me and come to want me ages ago. As soon as you were tested and negotiations for you were completed, you were supposed to be by my side. None of this hesitance would exist.” Riko slides one hand up Nathaniel’s chest to encircle his throat while he leans down and noses at the back of Nathaniel’s neck. “We just have to get you accustomed to me, that’s all,” he says.

Nathaniel doesn’t think he could ever become used to someone like Riko touching him. Not after his mom’s violent instruction and Riko’s terrifying implications. He doesn’t _want_ to become used to it. Complacency leads to death, that’s what his mom always taught him. He had to keep running or he would die, and getting used to something like this would surely kill him.

His head feels so jumbled and confused. Thoughts of whether he should just let Riko have what he wants warring with his mom’s harsh warnings and lessons. His own desires to be free and not have to worry about the monsters in his life. The hot water and the panic from having someone so close is making him dizzy and boneless.

Riko chuckles and picks up Nathaniel’s hands. He lays them on his own thighs, bracketing Nathaniel’s hips. They’re firm and muscular, harrier than Nathaniel’s, but that’s not much of a surprise. Nathaniel has always taken after the stereotypical Omega characteristics; he was whip-thin while on the run with his mom, but he’s gotten heavier since coming to live with Riko. He can already see where that extra weight will curve out his figure. Riko is only a handful of inches taller than Nathaniel, but it’s clear he’s built like an Alpha. Everywhere he’s pressed against Nathaniel feels solid. Nathaniel doesn’t doubt Riko spends a lot of his time working out as well, since Kevin always seems to spend his time between the gym and the library while he works his way through some history degree or another.

“You’ll come to enjoy me,” Riko says confidently. He’s still got his mouth pressed against the top knob of Nathaniel’s spine and it makes Nathaniel shiver. “Just like you’ll come to accept your place in life.”

Nathaniel closes his eyes.

-

The newest change to Nathaniel’s life are the school lessons with Kevin during the daytime. Riko makes some offhanded remark about Kevin being better than other tutors before shoving him into the library and wandering off. Nathaniel looks at Kevin sat at a desk and waiting for him. With a sigh, he takes the seat next to the Alpha.

Their lessons are interesting most of the time. Kevin has a tendency to ramble and go off-topic if Nathaniel doesn’t reel him in. He’s not great at math which is fine since Nathaniel is objectively good at it. He does have a talent with languages which surprises Nathaniel though.

Kevin’s Japanese is proficient, obviously, but his French is too, and that interests Nathaniel far more. Riko hasn’t made any mention that he wants Nathaniel to learn Japanese, but he hasn’t asked about other languages Nathaniel might speak, either. Hasn’t forbidden him speaking in anything other than English, possibly because he doesn’t think Nathaniel can.

Europe was the first place his mom took him after they escaped, though, and Nathaniel speaks like a native. French, through Canada as well, later, and Germany from his time in Austria and Germany and Switzerland. His Spanish is lacking, but he can communicate in several other languages passably.

He asks Kevin what the date is in French and has to hide his smile at the way Kevin flounders and drops the book he was reading from. Kevin’s eyes dart around the room like he’s making sure no one else is there, which is stupid. Nathaniel knows no one is around and Kevin should be able to smell that easily enough. But Kevin is a twitchy Alpha, one not at all confident in his own strength.

“You can’t let Riko hear that,” Kevin hisses in English.

Nathaniel rolls his eyes and continues speaking French. “Why not? He speaks in Japanese all the time around me. What does it matter what I speak?”

“He doesn’t like things he doesn’t understand. He nearly beat Jean to death for it once.” Kevin is prone to overreaction and exaggeration, but Nathaniel doesn’t think he’s actually being figurative.

He’s met the French Beta once when he came to bring Nathaniel’s meal instead of Thea. Taller and darker and infinitely more afraid. He looks the way Nathaniel is sure he always did in his father’s house; wary and cautious and just waiting for the next blow. He’s surprised Riko put that expression there, but maybe he shouldn’t be. Riko’s the reason for Kevin’s fear, too.

“Why do you have those tattoos?” Nathaniel asks when he’s supposed to be working on a math packet. He’s not sure if the Master has enrolled him in a high school program or if his identity is still as dead as it was when they ran from his father.

Kevin splutters the way Nathaniel knew he would, but dutifully answers in French. Nathaniel has been pushing and pestering him to since he figured out Kevin could speak it and Kevin has finally relented to it.

“Riko’s hierarchy,” Kevin says slowly. “He’s number one and I’m his brother, so I’m his number two.”

Nathaniel has never gotten a satisfactory answer about the brother thing, or why Kevin still thinks of Riko as anything other than his jailor. He’s just as trapped in this castle as Nathaniel is.

“Do you think he’ll make me three?” he asks, reaching up to touch the skin under his left eye. Riko has a habit of rubbing there with his thumb whenever the fancy strikes him. Maybe he’s imagining the number he’ll put there?

“I don’t think so. You’re not really third in his eye, are you?” Kevin hesitates and looks around the library, even though he knows no one is there. Nathaniel wouldn’t have spoken up if someone was. He knows that by now. “You’re very important to Riko. You know that, right?”

Nathaniel shrugs and looks away. What he is to Riko makes him very uncomfortable to think about, so he tries not to most days.

Kevin continues on like he doesn’t recognize Nathaniel’s discomfort. He’s good at that. “You’re probably the most important person in Riko’s life. I don’t know if he would ever say that to you, but I can’t think it’s anything other than true. I’m sure he’ll come to love you very soon. He’s always wanted someone to love.”

That’s the one thing about Kevin that Nathaniel really hates—he keeps trying to humanize Riko even though they both know what he’s really like. It’s like he thinks all the bad things Riko does aren’t really who he is; that he’ll go back to being the boy Kevin used to know some day. Nathaniel doubts it. Riko doesn’t seem in conflict with who he is.

There’s nothing Nathaniel could say to convince Kevin otherwise. He knows it would be futile to try.

“Ah, on that note,” Kevin starts, sounding more awkward than usual, if that’s at all possible. “You said you were on suppressants, didn’t you?”

“Yes,” Nathaniel says, heart beating wildly. He still hasn’t had his first heat, but he knows he’s been here long enough that Riko will start to wonder soon.

Kevin studiously keeps his eyes on the page he’s reading. “I can’t get you suppressants, that’s too risky. But we can get you contraceptives. I assume you aren’t ready to start a family yet?” There’s a dull flush to Kevin’s tan skin showing his obvious discomfort.

Nathaniel wraps an arm around his stomach and has to swallow against the feeling of too much saliva in his mouth that usually triggers his gag reflex. “I’m only fourteen,” he says dully. “And I don’t ever want to have kids.” He, of anyone, knows how kids can be used against their parents.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Kevin spits out, turning to look at him suddenly. “Fourteen? You’re lying, right?”

“I turn fifteen in a few weeks,” Nathaniel says mulishly. He’d been taken in November and it’s not like he’s forbidden from knowing how much time has passed.

Kevin covers his face with his hands. “Oh my god,” he says. He sounds slightly hysterical and Nathaniel edges away subtly. “Fifteen in a few weeks, oh fuck.”

“Well how old are _you_?” Nathaniel can’t help but snap. He hates when people bring up his age, like it makes any difference to his lived experiences. He’s older than most people with what he’s had to go through. Kevin can fuck off with his dramatics.

“I’ll be eighteen next month,” Kevin says, face still buried in his hands so it comes out muffled. “Riko is the same age.” He pauses and then lifts his face from his hands. He looks horrified. “Oh my god, he’s got a child bride. The way he talks about you and you’re—” He turns to Nathaniel. “Does he know? That you’re still a kid?”

Nathaniel refrains from saying _I’m not a child_ , even though he wants to. He has a feeling it wouldn’t make Kevin any happier. “He knows my father,” he says instead. “He knows I was supposed to be here five years ago when I was tested.” He doesn’t have to explain any further, thankfully.

It’s hard to imagine himself knowing at ten he would be paired with someone he’d never met before in his life. He’d known, sort of, that he’d probably end up in a political pair, like his mom and father had been, but there was no real reality of it happening when he was that young. To think there was someone out there who knew exactly what would happen when he was thirteen is slightly unsettling. Riko’s been thinking about him, imagining him and what he’ll be for five years. Nathaniel doesn’t know if that kind of obsession could ever breed love.

Kevin pinches the bridge of his nose and Nathaniel wonders if _this_ will be the thing that changes his mind about Riko. He somehow doubts it. “I’ll get a contraceptive as soon as I can. He’s going to be impatient about your heat soon, and there’s nothing I can do about that, but I can make sure nothing…else…happens, until you’re ready.” He can’t even say _get pregnant_. Nathaniel knows Kevin is a coward, but even this seems like too much.

“I won’t ever be ready,” he says stubbornly. There will never come a time where he wants to be pregnant, to have kids. He doesn’t want someone to knot him and claim him and do what they want with his body. He can only hope that his heats _never_ come, if that’s the case. He’ll deny that to Riko, even if he has to give everything else up.

Kevin’s pained silence tells him how much he thinks Nathaniel’s opinions matter.

-

Unsurprisingly, Riko’s patience does not last very long.

He throws Nathaniel onto the bed in his room, pressing him into the sheets while Nathaniel tries his hardest not to struggle. Riko’s hands are tight enough to bruise as he holds Nathaniel down. He’s got his nose in the junction between Nathaniel’s neck and shoulder, inhaling deeply like he’ll be able to discern Nathaniel’s secrets.

“There was no scent of heat at that nasty hideout you were in, and I know you’ve been here long enough that you should be onto a new cycle. So why haven’t you gone into heat yet? What’s stopping you?” He presses his body flush against Nathaniel’s on the bed.

“I—I don’t know.” Nathaniel’s heart is rabbiting in his chest, so fast it hurts. He’s trying everything he can not to think about the bulge he can feel against his thigh.

“You’re _lying_ ,” Riko snarls. He tips Nathaniel’s chin up so he can see the furious pulse pounding at his throat. “Tell me _now_.”

Nathaniel yelps at the none-too-gentle press of teeth against his throat. “I haven’t presented!” he shouts, unable to stop himself.

Riko goes still on top of him. After a few moments where all Nathaniel can hear is the ragged sound of his own panting breaths, he pulls back. His expression is confused, gaze searching. “But you’re an Omega. Presentation coincides with adolescence for Omegas.”

The clear bewilderment in his voice would usually make Nathaniel laugh, but nothing about this situation is funny. “Mom said it was normal. Delayed presentation because of environmental factors.” His voice is shaky and he can’t make it stop.

Dark fury fills Riko’s face and scent again, but this time Nathaniel knows it’s not directed at him. “If she wasn’t already dead, I’d rip that bitch apart with my claws,” he says. Nathaniel doesn’t let himself wince. “You’re not lying?” he asks. “You’ve never had a heat before?”

Nathaniel knows his face is red but he can’t think of any use for being embarrassed. Riko has already seen him in far more compromising situations. Asking about his presentation can’t be any worse than that. Somehow it is. He shakes his head.

If pressed, Nathaniel would say that the look on Riko’s face at that revelation is something akin to delight. His pleased, aroused scent fills the room and Nathaniel shivers at how potent it is. How overwhelming. His own terror smells like the tiniest off-note in a bouquet of happiness.

“That,” Riko says, leaning back down to press kisses over Nathaniel’s jaw, “is something we can fix.”

-

Riko is called away on business before he can do any of the ‘fixing’ he was talking about. It’s a small amount of relief to Nathaniel, but he’ll take anything he can at this point. Just the thought of what Riko is going to do sets his stomach churning with nausea and he finds it hard to get out of bed. Thea has little patience for what she calls his hysterics, so Kevin spends more time with Nathaniel than usual.

He’s sympathetic, of course, but there’s nothing he can do to stop whatever it is Riko is going to do. He says he has no clue what it’ll be, either, but somehow Nathaniel doesn’t believe him. Probably it’s the way Kevin can’t bring himself to look Nathaniel in the eye, or the slight sour smell of guilt he carries around him now.

Either way, Nathaniel is dreading whatever Riko’s come up with.

“I don’t want to present,” he says to Kevin while his back is turned. Nathaniel is wrapped around a pillow in bed, unwilling or unable to come out of his room. “I don’t want to lose control like that.” He’s never had a heat, but he knows what it entails. His mom might’ve been pleased he hadn’t presented, but that didn’t stop her from telling him every excruciating detail of what was in store for him.

Kevin makes a sympathetic noise and runs his hand over Nathaniel’s back. It would be soothing if Kevin had a soothing bone in his entire body. As it is it just feels awkward and forced. “I’m sorry, Nathaniel. I know it doesn’t seem it now, but things will be okay. Alphas aren’t the brutes popular fiction depicts us as. Riko will take care of you.”

It’s a hollow promise. Kevin knows just as well as Nathaniel that Riko isn’t gentle; he likes causing pain and terror. He likes winning. There’s nothing to say his treatment of Nathaniel during such a vulnerable time will be anything less than brutal.

Nathaniel pulls his comforter up above his head until Kevin gets the hint and leaves.

-

“My name is Smith and I’ll be your endocrinologist while we figure out what’s gone wrong with you.”

The doctor is tall with brown hair and brown eyes and obviously an Alpha from his scent. He doesn’t look at Nathaniel when he speaks but at Riko. It’s like Nathaniel isn’t even in the room.

His Beta nurse smiles at Nathaniel, though, when she walks him through taking a blood sample. She’s got kind eyes and she telegraphs every movement she’s going to make towards him before she does it. She’s enough to bring Nathaniel’s terror to heel and help him breathe normally again.

Riko and Dr. Smith are discussing possible causes for his delayed presentation. Well, Smith is listing reasons and Riko is listening carefully. Nathaniel tries not to pay attention to them and phrases like _hormone imbalance_ or _immunosuppression_ or _chromosomal irregularity_. They’re too scary to listen to.

The best-case scenario for Nathaniel is that he’s barren, can’t have heats _or_ children. But he knows that if that’s true, Riko will have no use for him. He’ll be as good as dead. The Butcher of Baltimore didn’t abide by useless things, and nothing Nathaniel has learned about Riko makes him seem like he’s any more inclined to tolerate them.

“It’s probably just stress,” the nurse says softly while she puts a band aid over the draw site. “Nine times of ten it’s stress, but you know how Alphas are. Always going on about worst-case scenarios.” She smiles at Nathaniel and brushes the curls back from his forehead in a gesture that feels foreign. Possibly she’s going for momly, but it’s not something Nathaniel’s mom has ever done for him that he remembers. “I’m Abby, it’s good to meet you, Nathaniel.”

Nathaniel wonders how much Riko is paying Dr. Smith and nurse Abby to come out to Castle Evermore to take a look at him and figure out what’s wrong. He knows there are Moriyama physicians, but endocrinology is a specialty. What will Riko do if it turns out Nathaniel _is_ barren and he’s wasted all this money on nothing?

“Oh dear,” Abby says when the thermometer she’s put under his tongue has beeped and she’s taken a look at the results. “You’re running a slight fever, you poor thing. Well, that’s always a good thing when looking at heat cycles. Fevers are the first sign. Of course, you know that,” she says with a smile.

He hadn’t known that, or maybe his panic had made him forget. It wasn’t like he admitted to feeling bad or sick when he was with his mom. They didn’t have time for that, and she usually made him feel worse by the time she was done convincing him he was fine enough to go on.

Smith orders Nathaniel into a hospital gown, oblivious or uncaring of Nathaniel’s discomfort over undressing in front of other people. Smith doesn’t acknowledge Nathaniel’s extensive scarring, but Abby’s eyes go very wide and she slants the quickest of looks at Riko sitting in the corner of the room going through his phone. When she looks back at Nathaniel, he subtly shakes his head, trying to tell her Riko didn’t have a hand in any of it. He’s not sure if she believes him by the careful way her face goes blank.

Omegas might not technically be personal property anymore, but there’s still not much protecting them legally from whatever their Alpha wants to do to them. Domestic violence doesn’t exist when one partner is unable to go against whatever the other wants. Proving Riko harmed Nathaniel—or really, any Alpha at all—would be next to impossible.  The only time actions would be taken to protect an Omega would be if the Omega was pregnant, or if the perpetrator was someone other than their bonded Alpha.

Nathaniel thinks about anything other than being an Omega, especially a pregnant one, as Smith examines him. He doesn’t have much experience with doctors other than the back alley ones his mom had to take him to the very few times he absolutely had to have medical attention. This somehow feels more humiliating with the uncaring way Smith looks at him and the way Riko is still in the room acting as if nothing out of the ordinary is happening. At least Abby looks sympathetic at Nathaniel’s side.

“We’ll have the bloodwork results back in a few days,” Smith tells Riko once he’s done with the physical examination. “That will tell us which direction to move in much better than just looking at the boy. He seems completely average on the outside, but the results will reveal any abnormalities we’d need to look at for further testing. Until then.” He’s brisk with his handshake for Riko and the way he leaves the room, not once speaking _to_ Nathaniel.

Abby helps Nathaniel back into his clothes, even though he doesn’t need it. Riko watches for a moment before leaving, phone already pressed to his ear. Obviously, the Beta doesn’t worry him, even though Riko seems to have huge contempt for most Betas, women especially.

“Don’t worry, dear,” Abby says absentmindedly, buttoning the last button on Nathaniel’s shirt and then patting him on the shoulder. “Everything will be alright, I’m sure of it.” She pulls Nathaniel in for a hug which he immediately tries to pull away from. “Birth control, from _deux_ ,” she whispers into his ear, stilling his motions. She slides something into his back pocket and then pulls away, smiling at him fondly. “Chin up, Nathaniel.” She looks like any other oblivious middle-aged woman as she smiles at him.

She’s the _we_ Kevin mentioned, before, or part of it. Nathaniel hadn’t paid any attention to the pronoun, thought Kevin was just far too into himself like always. To think he has something like connections to the outside world, and the courage to defy Riko, is unbelievable. If Nathaniel didn’t have the proof in his pocket, he _wouldn’t_ believe it.

Riko is waiting for him when he leaves the room, an impatient tilt to the line of his shoulders. He looks Nathaniel over and then draws his lip back. “You smell like Beta,” he grumbles, pulling Nathaniel in and wrapping his arms around him. The hug is far less comforting than the one offered by Abby, but Nathaniel doesn’t let himself even think about trying to pull away. “We’ll have to burn these clothes to get the stink off.”

As long as Nathaniel gets the pills Abby put for him in his pocket first, he doesn’t care what Riko does with his clothes.

-

The next few days, Riko is obviously impatient for results, but he’s surprisingly gentle with Nathaniel. They bathe together, which has become something almost normal for him, and Riko has taken to pulling Nathaniel into his bed at night so he can sleep wrapped around the Omega, but nothing untoward ever happens. He might be waiting to know whether or not Nathaniel will be of any use to him

Nathaniel’s been taking the birth control given to him by Abby. It’s hidden in a hollowed-out hole he made in one of the slats under his mattress with a knife Kevin conveniently misplaced during one of their lessons together. He got it back the same way once Nathaniel was done with it.

There’s a real feeling of relief at knowing no matter what the outcome of the results, Nathaniel won’t be getting pregnant anytime soon. Not as long as he can help it, anyway.

Riko takes him to the same office he was in before. Smith and Abby are waiting for them. Smith looks incredibly bored, but Abby looks uncomfortable and that clues Nathaniel in to the fact that he’s not going to like what Smith has to say.

“There’s nothing wrong with the Omega,” Smith tells Riko with no preamble. “Due to childhood malnutrition and stress, his development was delayed. With proper nutrition, a stable environment and care, his heats will start within the year.”

That sounds like what Nathaniel expected, but his anxiety doesn’t abate. He has a feeling Smith isn’t done.

“That’s it?” Riko asks. “I just have to wait? There’s nothing that can be done?”

Smith’s gaze slides over to a case on the desk Nathaniel hadn’t noticed before. “I didn’t say that. Heats can be artificially created or stimulated, with the right cocktail of drugs.”

“It’s not recommended,” Abby says quickly even though Smith narrows his eyes at her. “The body knows what’s best for itself. Waiting and letting Nathaniel’s natural heat catch up with his health is the best for him.”

Riko looks between the two before dismissing Abby with a wave. “You can make him have a heat? How soon?”

Smith smiles. It’s not an especially nice smile. “As soon as you’d like.”


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life with Riko has to get worse before it gets better. Or maybe it'll just get worse and stay worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this came a lot quicker than i expected it to. not as long as the first chapter, but you have to give me some credit, right?? anyway, if this chapter feels very disjointed, there's a reason for that. neil is, very obviously, falling into a super heavy depression, and as anyone with depression knows, time moves at an unobservable rate when you're depressed. 
> 
> no andrew in this chapter! but 100% he will be in the next one. just had to get this out of the way first.
> 
> chapter warnings: unethical medical practices, disassociation, rape/gang-rape of an underage character, physical violence, physical and psychological torture, riko. he should just be a warning in and of himself, shouldn't he?
> 
> this will _probably_ be the worst of it for neil, but who knows. if i vaguely follow the books, he might have some more awfulness in store. i guess we'll just have to see.

Neil goes to bed aching and too-hot. Abby had looked at him apologetically as she administered a series of shots that felt like fire going into his arm while Smith explained what was going on to Riko.

“He’ll need a series of shots every two days for a week. They’ll artificially create the conditions necessary to trigger a heat in him. As it’s his first, and as it will be helped along, it will be intense. Expect it to last the full week and to be extremely harsh on his system,” Smith had said, all like he was reporting the weather. “You’ll need to monitor him closely for dehydration and, in the rarest cases, shock.”

Riko looked as close to giddy as Nathaniel had ever seen him. “So, it’ll happen in a week?”

“As long as his body accepts the hormones being given to it, yes.” 

They made plans for Abby to come by and give him his shots every two days while Abby tried to convey her sympathy through small touches and looks. Nathaniel felt numb to it, helpless in the reality of a stimulated heat. The one thing he hadn’t wanted, that he’d hoped beyond rational hope wouldn’t happen.

“I’m sorry, Nathaniel,” Abby had whispered before her and Smith left for the day.

Now, in bed, Nathaniel tries not to think about the evident sympathy on her face. Her apologies really meant nothing in the end, not if she couldn’t do anything to stop it happening.

He doesn’t understand why this is happening to him. Why is Riko allowed to dictate his medical needs? Why didn’t Smith take one look at Nathaniel and call the authorities? Sure, Alphas had never done Nathaniel a good turn in his life, but they couldn’t all be monsters, could they? With fewer Omegas being born every year, surely they wouldn’t go out of their way to allow outright abuse and rape to occur to one?

And for that matter, how was Riko able to secure medical services for him in the first place? Nathaniel was underage and they _weren’t_ mated or bonded, nor did Riko have parental consent, as far as Nathaniel knew.

Then again, he did mention contract negotiations, didn’t he? If his father had signed Nathaniel’s rights over to Tetsuji or Riko, there was no reason anyone would bat an eye at what Riko was doing.

It just wasn’t fair. Not much in Nathaniel’s life had been, not much in _any_ Omega’s, as far as he was aware, but this was too much. He didn’t want this burning feeling spreading through his body, didn’t want what it would cause him to become. He didn’t want Riko and his grasping fingers and hungry eyes. He didn’t want _any_ of this. There just wasn’t anything he could do about it. 

-

Every day passes far too quickly, as far as Nathaniel is concerned. He sees Abby twice more and every day he feels hotter and hungrier and exhausted. There are almost constant aches in his stomach and back and everything smells too much all at once. He can tell who’s in the manor at any given time, because he can just _smell_ them all. It’s revolting and he’s thrown up more than once over it.

Kevin says nothing during their lessons, doesn’t even complain when Nathaniel spends most of the time hanging out the window, trying to let the fresh air take away the smell of anything else. He tried to hug Nathaniel once, but just the touch of him made Nathaniel’s skin crawl and Kevin drew away, obviously smelling something off of Nathaniel that warned him away.

That was something Omegas developed, wasn’t it? The ability to make Alphas back away with just one sniff. Even the nose dead ones were hesitant to approach him during the week while it felt like his body was being torn apart. The Betas in the Moriyama service didn’t seem to notice, which was somewhat of a relief. At least Nathaniel could feel the slightest bit normal around them.

Abby comes by his room for his last set of shots. Nathaniel feels miserable, can’t even drag himself from bed to meet her at the usual office. He’s too hot and his limbs feel heavy and achingly stiff. Not to mention what he can smell starting to come off him. It’s the clearest indication of an impending heat he needs. Whatever made Alphas fuck off is starting to turn sweet and cloying and he knows what that means.

“You poor thing,” Abby whispers, wiping the damp curls away from his face. She looks so _sad_ for him and he wants to snap that being sad is _useless_ , but he can’t bring himself to. 

Kevin is at the door, ostensibly as a chaperone, but he’s casting furtive glances down the hall to make sure no one is around. “Abby, hurry up. We don’t have much time.” 

“Of course.” Abby takes out the syringes and gives Nathaniel his usual two shots. She takes out a third, however, and pauses before pressing the needle to skin. “I don’t know if you’ll be…cognizant enough to take your birth control during your heat,” she says, catching Nathaniel’s gaze. “I’ll try to get something else for you for your next heats, but for now, this will keep you safe.”

Nathaniel should thank her for this, for everything, for working with Kevin to get him birth control in the first place. But a muscle spasm cuts him off, making him whimper. He sees the way Kevin goes stiff at the door. 

With a frown, Abby gives him his last shot. She wipes the sweat away from his cheeks and then goes to leave. She hesitates at Kevin’s side but says nothing before she leaves.

“Are you okay?” Kevin asks hesitantly. He’s hovering in the doorway still, clearly unsure if he should escort Abby out or stay by Nathaniel’s side. 

“What the fuck do you think?” Nathaniel snaps. It’s enough to send the Alpha fleeing, figurative tail between his legs. Nathaniel curls up on his side after kicking the sheets down by his feet. He’s starving and too hot and he feels like he’s going to throw up if someone so much as looks at him right now.

Happy birthday to him.

-

The first thing Nathaniel thinks when he wakes up is _thirsty_. He’s so hot and his throat feels like it’s never been so dry in his life. There’s no possible way he’s ever been so parched, even when he was on the literal run.

The next thing Nathaniel thinks is he’s wet the bed. That’s never happened, not even when he was little. Probably the fear at what his father would do to him if he ever did such a thing. But he’s clearly lying in a wet patch of sheets, everything sticking and hot and uncomfortable. He’s sweat through his clothes, but this is different.

With horror, he realizes what it is. His whole body is wracked with a shiver and more of the wetness leaks _out_. God, he knows what that is. He’s never felt it, has never been aroused enough to produce it, but he knows his body is producing lubrication to make his heat easier.

Nathaniel is a little surprised he’s still aware of what’s going on. From everything his mom has told me, from the few tawdry books he’s read, Omegas usually lose all sense of rationality, don’t they? He feels way too hot and his body is like one exposed livewire, but he can still _think_. 

Maybe it’s better if he doesn’t, though? He knows what’s coming, and maybe it’s better if he’s not able to be aware of it. Already he can feel an itch starting under his skin, a _need_ he’s never felt, before. It’s awful and he feels sick to his stomach, but Nathaniel knows it’ll be impossible to ignore before too long. Biological processes made that much more potent from Smith’s shots.

A sharp ache in his stomach draws Nathaniel’s attention away from those thoughts and to his current predicament. Soon, Riko will be here, unable to resist the pheromones Nathaniel is no doubt leaking all over the place. All Nathaniel can smell is his own body’s physical secretions, too-sweet and cloying. He’s aroused, uncomfortably so, enough that his body feels detached and not his. He feels dizzy all of a sudden and misses the door to his room opening. There’s a low rumble that makes the hair on his arms stand up and the smell that hits him makes his body shudder.

An Alpha. Standing next to the bed and filling the room up with his own scent of arousal and excitement. Nathaniel’s body reacts to the scent. He goes pliant, chin tilted up and next exposed. 

Riko climbs on top of him. He’s still letting out that low rumble but Nathaniel can feel it pressed against his chest now. It makes him feel dizzy again. Riko puts his nose against Nathaniel’s neck, inhales deeply, and then replaced his nose with his tongue to taste him.

“ _Nathaniel_ ,” he growls, scratching Nathaniel’s throat with his teeth. 

Nathaniel whimpers at the shock that sends down his body. He can’t find his voice, can’t seem to say anything at all. His body is doing everything for him. 

“You smell…fuck, this is what I’ve been waiting for,” Riko says. His excitement is obvious, Nathaniel can smell it and feel it both. There’s a certain hint of longing and joy there, too, but they’re hard to focus on.

Things are getting harder to focus on now that Riko is here. Riko, who smells so good, who obviously desires Nathaniel, wants him. There are hands in his hair and Riko is kissing his neck, alternating between licking and biting. It feels good, so much better than Nathaniel ever thought it could.

It feels so good and he feels so hot. His thoughts are slipping out of his head, replaced with flashes of hands and a mouth and a hard body pressed against his. He blinks and his shirt is gone along with his sleep pants. Another and he’s face down, hands clenched in the bedding above his head. 

There’s a sharp pain that punches through the haze of pleasure, but that’s quick to go away as well. It’s like he’s floating, asleep and away from everything. It’s perfect, everything soft and hot and sweet, he doesn’t have to think about anything.

He comes to and scrambles away from the arms holding him, trying to pull away from _something_ deep inside him, keeping him immobile. It’s scary, the sudden awareness.

“Shh, it’s fine,” Riko says from behind him. They’re pressed together, Nathaniel’s back against Riko’s chest, and Riko has both arms around Nathaniel, keeping him securely in place. “Calm down.”

The haze is ebbing and flowing over him, making him aware of the pressure and fullness and ache in his body one second and taking it away the next. He’s dizzy with the scent of contentedness coming off Riko and the smell of both of them filling up the room.

Riko presses a kiss to the back of Nathaniel’s neck, arms squeezing tighter for what must be a hug. “This heat will be a success,” he murmurs. “I just know it.”

Nathaniel is pulled down into an exhausted sleep before he can let himself figure out what Riko meant by that.

-

The next week passes in a confusing flash for Nathaniel. When he isn’t swamped down by his heat and Riko, he’s ravenous and gasping for water. Someone must bring supplies by, because Riko is always there to give him what he needs before he can even ask. He doesn’t know what the last time he spoke was, outside of anything he might say to Riko when they…well, he doesn’t think he’s said anything, anyway. 

He’s wrung out and exhausted and he’s not exactly sure how many days have passed. He has to assume it’s been a week, because his body feels like his, again. His skin crawls at the smell in his room, sex and sweat and any number of other things Nathaniel has no desire to examine. His whole body aches. Nathaniel feels filthy in a way he doesn’t think a bath will help, but he does want one of those, too. 

Surprisingly, Riko isn’t in his room with him. There’s a note on the bedside table instructing him to dress and use Riko’s bathroom should he so desire. Nathaniel’s glad not to have to face Riko yet. He takes the opportunity of an unlocked door to go get his desired bath.

No one is in the hallway when Nathaniel peeks out. He dashes to Riko’s door, unwilling to let anyone see him like this. He knows he stinks of heat and specifically of Riko and as much as it makes him want to gag, the thought of someone else smelling it on him makes him feel even worse.

The hot water of the bath helps relax his exhausted and sore body. Nathaniel dumps in whatever strong-smelling thing he can find and scrubs every inch of his body until he can no longer smell anything else.

He very carefully doesn’t acknowledge the bruises or bite marks and chest and thighs or the slightest tint of red to the water from when he sat down. There’s no point in thinking about them or where they came from. He _knows_ where they came from. It’s not like they can be a surprise. He knew what was going to happen as soon as Riko came into his room.

Nathaniel only realizes he’s crying when he sees the drops hitting the bathwater. He scrubs at his face and sniffs, frustrated with his body doing things he doesn’t tell it to. He dunks his head under the water and then uses the shampoo set out, determined to ignore the hot tears falling down his cheeks. There’s no _point_ crying over something already done. It doesn’t _matter_.

Nothing he thinks to himself seems to stop the tears and he finally gives up after his hair is clean and his eyes continue to betray him. He sits in the tub and watches the bubbles slowly pop and tries not to think about a lost week and the things done to him when he couldn’t possibly have helped himself.

There’s a soft knock on the door and then Kevin sticks his head in, looking scared and cautious. “Nathaniel?” The Alpha takes him in, curled up in the bath and crying like some Omega cliché and rushes to his side. He reaches out to touch Nathaniel, but hesitates when Nathaniel flinches back from him. 

He can’t abide being touched, not right now, and especially not by an Alpha. “Leave me alone,” he croaks out, wincing at his own voice. Kevin looks pained and uncertain, crouched by the tub. Nathaniel would laugh if he thought it was funny at all. “Just go, Kevin. If Riko sees you he’s going to be mad.”

Riko might tolerate Kevin near Nathaniel more than most, but even he would lose it seeing Kevin around Nathaniel when the Omega is naked and vulnerable. 

“I’m sorry,” Kevin says. He really looks it. There’s a desperate sort of hurt on his face. It’s almost amusing. “Nathaniel, I’m so sorry.”

Whole lot of good him being sorry now does.

-

Nathaniel isn’t sure if Riko is avoiding him out of some small sense of obligation or if he really is busy with work, but he doesn’t see the Alpha for two whole weeks. He spends the first few days working with Thea to get his room clean and aired out; there’s no way he can sleep in there with all the stink. 

After that, he can’t really bring himself to leave the room and be around people. As much as he tells himself he’s being stupid, he can’t abide people looking at him and _knowing_ what’s been done. What he did. It doesn’t matter that he couldn’t control himself, he was still there, still did whatever Riko wanted. He should’ve been stronger, kept his wits and fought as much as he could.

There’s no way he could have, not in heat and with an Alpha like Riko, but he still tells himself he could have tried. It makes him feel a little less helpless.

When Riko comes back, he has a pregnancy test. The reminder makes Nathaniel’s stomach clench, and the humiliation of peeing on a stick in front of the Alpha only makes it worse. The only thing that brings him some small bit of relief is the negative on both tests he’s given.

Riko is unhappy, but he seems unsurprised. “Smith said getting pregnant during your first heat would be a one in a million shot,” he says as Nathaniel cleans up. “I shouldn’t be surprised, but I thought maybe you’d prove to be exceptional.” He grins and pulls Nathaniel into his lap, nose immediately going to the crook of his neck. “That’s okay. Just means we have to try again, doesn’t it?”

-

In the weeks that follow, Kevin is cautious when approaching Nathaniel. Thea doesn’t treat him any differently, which he both expects and appreciates. The Alphas he happens to interact with in the manor all have a particular look on their faces that he refuses to read into, and the Betas stop talking when he walks into a room they’re in.

He hates it. It feels like being back in his father’s house, the way everyone eyed him like he was some horrific science experiment someone accidentally dragged in. Nathan with his easy abuse, Lola and her sharp smiles and knives. The others who were allowed to hurt him when he made his father mad. 

There’s no Mary here to keep him occupied in her rooms with stories of knights and fairies and magic. No soft Beta scent to fall asleep next to, with strong arms a comfort in the night. There’s just Kevin and his inability to keep that stupid pitying look off his face.

Nathaniel finally snaps and snarls at Kevin one day in the library, tired of the Alpha treating him with kid gloves over something they both knew was inevitable. Some instinct makes Kevin snarl back, standing up quick enough to knock over his chair and looming over Nathaniel dangerously. The Omega immediately subsides, head tilting up and back in a clear sign of submission. 

Kevin’s growls stop and he backs away quickly, nearly tripping over himself in his haste. “Oh, God, Nathaniel, I’m sorry, I—”

“Stop fucking treating me like I’m some delicate waif that’s going to break,” Nathaniel says. His heart is racing from the presence of an angry Alpha, and the sick guilt pouring off of Kevin makes him nauseous. 

“But—”

“We both know what happened, we know it’s going to happen again. I don’t need your fucking pity, Day. If you’re going to be like that, just leave me the fuck alone.” Nathaniel should know better than to provoke an Alpha, but he’s so _angry_ , has nowhere else to vent it. 

Kevin’s face screws up. “I. Sorry,” he says gruffly, then holds up his hands when Nathaniel growls. “Fuck, I don’t know how to handle this, okay? I don’t know what to do with you.”

“You don’t have to _do_ anything. Just treat me the way you did before.” Nathaniel physically can’t handle Kevin’s guilt and concern and hesitance anymore. “Okay?”

The wary look is still on Kevin’s face, but he still nods slowly. “Okay.”

Nathaniel isn’t sure if Kevin can keep his end of the bargain, but anything is better than dealing with the Alpha’s emotions on top of his own.

-

Newly presented Omegas go into heat every two months, Nathaniel knows. His mom told him everything he needed to know about his status, even if he hadn’t presented yet. She wanted him ready for what would happen to him. Every two months during puberty, then it would even off to every four after and eventually six during middle age, until eventually stopping altogether. 

Nathaniel didn’t know what that meant for him, since his presentation had been delayed so long. Every two months, he was prepared for, but hopefully it would go down to four as soon as possible. He didn’t know how long puberty lasted for Omega males, but he could only hope he wouldn’t be cursed with the two-month cycle for long.

His deadline was coming up already and Nathaniel could feel himself starting to panic at the thought. Two months wasn’t nearly long enough when he spent every single day dreading the next. It felt hard to breathe, especially when Riko dropped careless hints about what they would do next time to ensure his pregnancy. 

Kevin pulls him aside a couple of days before his heat and presses two pills into his hand. “Abby says you can take those as an oral contraceptive to cover your heat.” 

He’d still been sneaking Nathaniel his birth control pills, but they both knew he wouldn’t be in any position to remember them during his heat. He wouldn’t have the opportunity, either, not with Riko around. As determined as Riko was to get Nathaniel pregnant, Nathaniel would in no way let it happen. He swallows the pills dry and then leaves before Riko can see them and get suspicious.

There’s no way to know if there’s something in the pills other than a contraceptive, but the next few days are fuzzy. Nathaniel doesn’t feel as stressed or anxious about what’s about to happen. When he sees Riko, he isn’t filled with dread and a bitter sort of anger. He doesn’t feel anything, really. That’s much, much better, as far as he’s concerned.

The next week goes by as swiftly and is just as muddled as the first time. Things like pain and hunger are enough to bring him back, briefly, but he slips back into the haze of not knowing quickly enough. It’s better that way. He doesn’t _want_ to remember what happens. 

He wakes up aching and covered in sweat and other fluids and bruises and immediately wants a bath. Riko is still sleeping behind him when Nathaniel gets up. Looking down, it’s surprising to see that he just looks like a normal kid just a little bit older than Nathaniel. He doesn’t look like a rapist, doesn’t look like someone who enjoys causing others pain. His mouth is slightly parted and his face is calm and relaxed while he sleeps. 

For the briefest second, Nathaniel imagines slitting Riko’s throat while he sleeps. He knows how. Riko would bleed out quickly, wouldn’t even be able to call for help if Nathaniel cut deep enough to sever his vocal chords. He can almost feel Riko’s blood on his hands, hot and smelling sharp like wet copper. 

Riko murmurs something and shifts to roll into Nathaniel’s vacated spot. 

As satisfying as it would be to kill the Alpha, Nathaniel doesn’t have a knife anymore. He stupidly gave it back to Kevin. There was no guarantee it wouldn’t be found by the people who clean his room, reported to Riko. But if Nathaniel had risked it and kept it, he’d have it now. He could put his father’s lessons to practice.

It wouldn’t change what happened, though, and Nathaniel doubts he would get a kinder death at the hands of someone else for retribution.

He lets the thought go and slips on Riko’s robe to go to the Alpha’s room for a bath.

-

The process repeats itself again, and Nathaniel can live with it. He has no memory of his time under the influence of his heat. Riko is overly handsy outside of them, but he doesn’t push for anything, surprisingly. He’s busy with whatever his uncle has him doing, or possibly he’s content with what they do for the week Nathaniel can’t control himself.

After his fourth heat and subsequent negative pregnancy tests, Riko’s gentle mask breaks.

He backhands Nathaniel, shoves the used sticks in his face. Nathaniel scrunches his nose up. The scent of his own urine is strong and offensive. Riko hits him again. 

“Again! How long do I have to wait until you do what you’re supposed to!” Riko shoves Nathaniel, shoves him again until he trips over a stray washcloth on the floor and falls. “You’re useless to me if you can’t get pregnant! What’s wrong with you?”

Nathaniel flinches and shrinks away, covering his face with his hands. “I’m sorry, Riko,” he says, even though he’s _not_. Nothing feels better than each time a test reads negative. Denying Riko this one thing is as satisfying as anything has ever been in his life.

Riko throws the tests away and reaches down to grab Nathaniel’s hair. He pulls the Omega up and shakes him until Nathaniel cries out and look at him. “This is your fault, isn’t it? You’re doing something?”

The accusation has Nathaniel’s blood running cold. Does Riko know…? But no, he can’t. There’s no way. He would _actually_ kill Nathaniel if he did. It’s just his paranoia running rampant, that has to be it.

“I’m sorry,” he says again. 

“Sorry isn’t good enough!” Riko shouts. He lets Nathaniel drop back to the floor and takes something out of his pocket. The knife glints in the light of the bathroom and cold dread fills Nathaniel at the sight of it. 

No one’s threatened him with a knife in so long that he’d almost forgotten how scared he is of them. Unfortunately, Riko doesn’t look like this is the first time he’s held a knife in his hand with the intent to use it on a person. 

He straddles Nathaniel’s lap, presses the knife against his cheek and watches with obvious interest as Nathaniel tries not to flinch back from the touch. It feels like his skin is crawling at the scent of malice in the air.

“You have one job, Nathaniel,” Riko croons, tracing the knife over Nathaniel’s cheeks and lip, down over his throat while Nathaniel holds as still as he can. “What am I supposed to do with you if you can’t do that one thing?”

All Nathaniel can focus on is the knife trailing across his collarbones then over his shirt. He’s quivering, unable to stop himself. His body knows what a sadistic person can do to him with a knife, even if he’s been stupid enough to forget. 

“Turn around,” Riko says suddenly, getting up. 

“Riko, please—” 

“I said _turn_ ,” he snarls. 

Nathaniel moves before he even has time to think, going onto his front and burying his head in his arms. It’s almost a relief when Riko pulls his shirt up instead of his pants down, but only just. The cold air of the bathroom makes his skin break out in goosebumps. Riko’s knife touches between his shoulder blades and Nathaniel jumps, hisses when the tip pierces skin. 

“I hate useless things, you know that by now, don’t you?” Riko sounds calm, but Nathaniel can smell the anger and frustration rolling off of him. He moves the knife between Nathaniel’s shoulders. The cut is shallow but still stings. “If you can’t be useful to me, I’ll carve you up the way the Butcher always intended.” 

He pauses and Nathaniel’s breath goes shallow. He’s terrified of whatever Riko’s just thought up. 

“Maybe I’ve been far too lenient. Pampered you too much. Your father knew how to handle you, didn’t he? Knew what a handful you could be if you weren’t collared properly.” The knife moves to press against the back of Nathaniel’s neck as if Riko’s imagining a real collar there. 

Riko’s never asked where Nathaniel’s scars came from, but he has to know. Most of them are far older than the length of time he was on the run with his mom. They’ve stretched and gone thin with age and his changing body. Riko has to know they came from his father’s house, from his father and Lola and his goons. Sure, some of them were from after, when his father’s men would catch up with them, or if his mom got too angry, but not the majority of them.

The knife moves back down between his shoulders, over the stinging shallow cut. Nathaniel isn’t very marked on his back. His father usually liked to see his face when he inflicted pain. Riko pushes it in, slow, and Nathaniel cries out.

“Maybe this is a lesson you need. You just can’t be good if left to your own devices.”

-

“You need to get up. I’m supposed to clean this mess up.”

Jean’s words are sharp, but he still looks scared when Nathaniel finally opens his eyes to glance at the Beta.

“Nathaniel, get up,” Jean says in French. 

He could get up. Should. He doesn’t want to stay in this bathroom, where the only smell is his own terror and the sharp copper of his blood. It’s nauseating. But he hurts and he doesn’t want to move.

Jean makes a noise of annoyance and reaches out to pull him up, ignoring the sharp sound of pain Nathaniel lets out. “Hush,” he snaps. “You should know better than to make a sound when you’re hurt.”

He talks like an Omega, like he has instincts about being hurt around Alphas. Nathaniel doesn’t say anything as Jean drags him over to the bathtub and props him up facing it. The position leaves his back exposed, which Nathaniel hates, but it’s better than anything touching it.

“Judging from this mess, you should be used to a few hurts,” Jean says brusquely. He sets something down on the lip of the tub next to Nathaniel’s head. It’s a first-aid kit. “This is nothing, isn’t it? You’re just being dramatic.”

“Fuck you,” Nathaniel coughs out. He must’ve screamed more than he thought if his throat hurts this much to talk.

Jean’s hands pause and he huffs out a short laugh. “There he is. Kevin’s told me you’re spirited. I can’t think that would help you at all here.” He continues running a wet cloth over Nathaniel’s back, cleaning off the blood. “Nothing needs stitches, although I’m sure you knew that. I’ll bandage you up. Maybe you can convince Kevin to change them for you, the useless Alpha.”

From what Nathaniel remembers, Jean is usually more cowed and cautious. If he’s felt Riko’s wrath, he should know better than to try to cheer Nathaniel up. He can’t help feeling a bit better, though, from how no-nonsense and focused the Frenchman is. 

“Thought you were supposed to clean up the mess,” Nathaniel says. Jean has moved on to smoothing a sharp smelling ointment over his cuts. It stings, but Nathaniel has felt much worse.

“Don’t see a bigger mess than the one in front of me.” Jean’s voice is steady and soft. He’s much better at soothing than Kevin could ever hope to be. His hands are just as steady and he doesn’t pause when Nathaniel winces or flinches away from him. Just moves on to the bandages and gauze necessary to clean him up.

“You should try not to make him mad like this,” Jean says. He sounds like he doesn’t believe his own advice is useful. Like Riko’s violence is inevitable.

Nathaniel snorts. “Can’t help not getting pregnant,” he says. It’s not true, but if Jean was sent as a spy to ferret out Nathaniel’s secrets, he can’t let anything slip.

Jean’s hands pause again and he reaches out to touch Nathaniel’s hand gently. Nathaniel lets him entwine their fingers, can’t help but clench them almost desperately when Jean doesn’t take them away.

“No, you can’t help that, can you?” he asks. He sounds sad. “Not like you chose to be an Omega. Who would?”

Nathaniel should be insulted, but he really isn’t. If he could choose, he would never want to be an Omega, or wish it on anyone else. Not if this is what they have to face. 

Jean continues to let Nathaniel hold his hand for a long time until he finally pulls away to finish wrapping Nathaniel up and clean the bathroom. His Beta scent is soothing and not dangerous at all. Nathaniel closes his eyes and focuses on that.

-

Kevin has a pinched look on his face the next time they meet in the library. Either he can smell the antiseptic on Nathaniel, or he talked to Jean. Nathaniel remembers Jean saying something about that, and Kevin mentions the Beta every now and again. He doesn’t try to apologize or ask Nathaniel about it, though, and for that he’s grateful.

He didn’t get a look at his back, but nothing felt bad enough to scar. Maybe Riko didn’t have as much practice at torture as he made it seem. Either way, Nathaniel is more annoyed at not being able to sleep on his back or side than anything else. It’s the only emotion he’s letting himself feel about the situation. If he lets anything else in, it’ll just be fear, and Nathaniel doesn’t want to live every day like that. Life is already exhausting enough. 

What limited patience Riko had is obviously gone. There are no more careful touches or shared baths or beds. On the one hand, Nathaniel is relieved not to have to put up with it, but on the other he knows what the opposite of kindness is. And what Riko had been was decidedly kind, he knows that now. When he thought Nathaniel would immediately give him what he wanted, he was the kind of attentive Alpha depicted in soft romance novels. The attention may not have been wanted, but it was surely easier to deal with than Riko’s foul moods now.

A little over a month until his heat comes again, and Nathaniel doesn’t know what to do, what to feel. Riko’s impatience is obvious, his anger easier to come to the surface now that he doesn’t trust Nathaniel to do what he needs. Everything he has to say to Nathaniel is cruel and ominous. Kevin is of little help as usual and Jean just reeks of nervousness every time Nathaniel sees him. 

So, it blindsides him when Riko takes him down to the basement of the castle. Nathaniel has never had good experiences in basements, can’t help but be thrown back to the one at his father’s house, how dark and cold and terrible it was. Already, he can smell the wet copper of blood, his own and others, and he has to stop himself from gagging. 

“You’re just not grateful,” Riko says as he tugs Nathaniel deeper into the basement. “You know, other Omegas out there aren’t treated half as well as I treat you. They would fall all over themselves to live here, to be with me, to have my pups. You don’t know how good you have it Nathaniel.” 

Nathaniel doesn’t let himself spit out that Riko should just go find _those_ Omegas, then, and leave him the fuck alone. He has the suspicion that wouldn’t go over well for him. 

“This will be a lesson for you. It’ll teach you to be _grateful_ for me, for what you have. Make you realize how good you have it, so you can stop acting like such a thankless bitch.” 

Riko pushes him into a room that smells overwhelmingly of Alpha. Nathaniel staggers and falls onto his knees, reeling. All he can smell is aggression and anger and lust and _want_ , all of it directed at him from the five or six Alphas he can see standing around the room.

“These are my Ravens,” Riko says. There’s a definite smell of triumph and malice coming off of him, with no little hint of glee. “Some of them, anyways. They deserve a reward after working so hard for me, don’t you agree?”

Nathaniel isn’t sure if Riko is talking to him or the other Alphas. He can’t think past the stench of desire that’s palpable in the air. He’s never had this directed at him. Even Riko’s want doesn’t have this edge of bloodlust. The whole feeling reminds him of Lola, the delight she smelt like when she made him hurt or bleed or cry. 

“Riko,” he whispers, backing up until he hits Riko’s legs. He looks up, desperate and terrified. “Riko, don’t. I’m sorry, _please_.”

Riko crouches down and reaches out to hold his cheek. “Oh, Nathaniel. Sorry just isn’t good enough.” He stands back up and turns to leave. “Do whatever you please. Nothing permanent, though. I’ll be back later.”

He closes the door after him and Nathaniel is left with an unknown number of Alphas, all _looking_ at him. One of them, tall and blond, steps forward. There’s a smile on his face that makes Nathaniel dizzy with fear.

“Okay, little Omega. Let’s have some fun.”

-

Unlike during his heat, Nathaniel doesn’t have the luxury of not being present when he’s with the Ravens. There are no pheromones to cloud his thoughts, no haze of warmth that takes him some place far away. He can zone out and try to think about life with his mother, during the few times they weren’t being actively hunted and life wasn’t so bad. But he is inevitably drawn back to the dark basement and the hands on him.

It’s worse, knowing. He’d thought to himself, maybe, _maybe_ it would be better to know what happened. So he wouldn’t have to let his imagination wander to worst-case-scenarios. But it’s not. It’s _not_. Nothing is worse than knowing.

Nothing is worse than waking up in his room, or the basement, or somewhere just as bad, and knowing what happened to him. Remembering. Hands and mouths and the searing, rending pain of being ripped apart from the inside. 

There’s no easy slide from his heat-driven arousal. Rarely do the Alphas care about initial preparation. His blood and their…it makes it easier, for them, and that’s the only respite Nathaniel gets. They’re not gentle, uncaring of his please and screams and sobs. 

Any notion Nathaniel might have had about Alphas instinctively being unable to harm Omegas is gone. Riko could have been an abnormality, but this just proves he isn’t. The easy cruelties inflicted on him prove Alphas don’t care. They just take what they want, damn what might happen to him.

There are more Ravens than the initial batch, Nathaniel comes to learn. A few women among the men, and those are almost worse. They remind him so much of Lola with their sharp nails and red lips. He hates them, all of them, wants nothing more than to lash out with the things he learned in his father’s house, but there are always more than two of them to hold him down. 

The fight is drained out of him quickly enough, though. It becomes harder and harder to try to muster up anything other than the blind panic that takes him whenever he’s taken to the basement. Even the panic dulls before too long. All that’s left is the hollow emptiness of acceptance.

Jean is let into the room after the Ravens leave and he drops down to Nathaniel’s side, reaching out to touch his hand. It’s the only thing that doesn’t hurt, doesn’t feel used. He watches the Beta silently.

“I’m sorry,” Jean says. Funnily enough, he sounds like he means it. Maybe he really did know what was coming for Nathaniel. Not like he could’ve done anything about it, even if he did. 

“Sorry’s not good enough,” Nathaniel parrots, voice dull. 

Jean nods, accepts the words without comment. He doesn’t do anything other than hold Nathaniel’s hand, content to let the silence stretch between them.

-

He’s never been so grateful for the blissful reprieve of his heat before.

-

Somehow, for some reason, he’s let outside. There are extensive gardens around Castle Evermore, tended by Betas who don’t spare him a second glance. Nathaniel sits on a bench in the middle of a butterfly garden and watches the insects fly around. There are birds chirping and the sound of bugs everywhere. A Monarch flits around two or three plants, coming ever closer to where Nathaniel’s sitting.

He hasn’t been outside in so long. The feel of sun is good against his skin. Warm and not hurtful at all. He aches, dully, but other than that, nothing feels bad. There’s a soft breeze that smells sharp, like fall is on its way. Has it been another year, already? It doesn’t feel like it, but the days do tend to blend together, now. He sleeps whenever he’s left alone and that makes time a tricky thing.

Nathaniel sits outside until it’s nearly dark, watching the comings and goings of insects and animals alike. It’s peaceful, easy, and he doesn’t have to think about anything at all. A soft touch to his shoulder from Thea reminds him of the real world, and he gets up and head back inside with her help.

-

“I don’t want it,” Nathaniel says dully, ignoring Kevin’s outstretched hand and the pills there.

Kevin frowns. “What? Why not?”

“What’s the point?” Nathaniel has his head on his hand, staring blankly out the library window. “I’m going to let Riko have what he wants.”

The sound Kevin makes would be funny if Nathaniel thought anything was funny anymore. He sets the pills down. “ _What_? Nathaniel, you _can’t_.”

Nathaniel glances at him. “Yes, I can. I’ve thought about it. If Riko gets what he wants, he’ll leave me alone. He won’t let…” Nathaniel cuts himself off at the thought of what Riko won’t let happen to him. “What’s the point of holding out now? It’ll happen sooner or later. Might as well be now.”

The thought of being pregnant makes Nathaniel feel physically ill, but anything has to be better than it is right now. He can’t keep living if all he has to look forward to is Riko and his Ravens.

Kevin grabs Nathaniel’s shoulders without thinking, letting go when Nathaniel flinches away from him. “Nathaniel, you can’t give _up_. What happens when you do…conceive? What about after you give birth? You know the first son goes to the Main family. Then what’ll happen to you?”

“I don’t care.” Anything to spare him his current life.

“Nathaniel, _please_.” Kevin’s never looked so desperate. It almost peaks Nathaniel’s interest. 

“Why?”

“You won’t always be here, not forever. I’ll get you out. I promise. But you can’t give up hope before I do.” Kevin looks so determined, so hopeful, and Nathaniel’s never seen him like that. He’s only ever been a cowardly Alpha, lurking in Riko’s shadow and trying his hardest not to be seen. 

Nathaniel searches Kevin’s eyes for a long time, trying to find something deceitful, but there’s nothing there. Just that cautious determination Nathaniel’s never seen before. With a sigh, he picks up the pills and swallows them, ignoring the scent of Kevin’s relief as it floods the library.

-

There’s a chance there’s more sedative in the contraceptive than normal. Nathaniel wouldn’t know. He breezes through the days without any thought. Maybe it’s a combination of his emotional numbness and the medication. He couldn’t even begin to guess. His heat comes again, and with it Riko, but Nathaniel doesn’t have to focus on that. There’s more pain this time, more flashes of comprehension drawn by discomfort, but even that goes away quickly enough. 

Nathaniel’s never been gladder not to be present during his heat. He’s a puppet to his body’s needs and whims, but at least he doesn’t have to be party to any of it. He doesn’t know how long it lasts, but he’s left alone for the two weeks following its end. Omegas, he knows, shouldn’t be disturbed after heat in order not to overload their delicate constitutions. Anything could trigger their bodies not to conceive, even the littlest amount of stress. 

Thea is assigned to him for the whole time, barely leaving to let him rest at night. She makes sure he eats, walks him around the gardens so he gets fresh air and sunshine. He’s not allowed strenuous activities, but the walks are nice enough. He thinks he spots Kevin here and there, but the Alpha never approaches them. Neither do any of the Ravens.

Of course, when the tests are inevitably negative, Riko’s rage fills the manor. He leaves Nathaniel a bloody heap in the room he usually takes him to for the Ravens to have their fill. Jean manages to come to him between sessions, tries to clean him up and put him back together, but Nathaniel doesn’t care any longer.

Let him die in this filthy place, covered in the filthy remnants of Riko and his Ravens. What does he care. There’s no point, no hope. Nothing Kevin said matters anymore. It was all false words to keep Nathaniel from doing something Kevin didn’t want. It didn’t mean anything, not really. There was no way Kevin would be able to keep him safe, let alone get him out. 

No, as long as Nathaniel continues to defy Riko and refuse to give him what he wants, he’ll continue existing in this hell. It would be better if he just stopped living. Save himself and any future children a lot of pain. If it could all end, wouldn’t that be better? Anything had to be better than this.

-

Nathaniel doesn’t bother lifting his head when his bedroom door opens. No one has locked it in a long time, but Nathaniel doesn’t bother with that, either. There’s no reason to. He can’t bring himself to care enough to try to escape, and even if he did, he would be caught. Riko has reassured him of that plenty of times.

“You will get up,” Thea says. She sounds more emotionless than usual, which is slightly impressive, even to Nathaniel. “The Master wishes to see you.”

“I don’t care,” Nathaniel says dully. 

Thea has very little patience for him, he’s known that for a long time, now. Today, however, she doesn’t rip his covers off or drag him from the bed the way she usually does when he doesn’t listen. Thinking about it, she hasn’t done that for a while, has she? Maybe she pities him. Nathaniel wouldn’t be surprised. 

“Nathaniel,” she says softly. She touches his shoulder and he flinches more from not hearing her move close than the actual touch. She removes her hand all the same. “It’s not Tetsuji who wishes to see you.”

That sparks the tiniest bit of something in Nathaniel that pushes past his numbness. There are only two people other than Tetsuji that anyone calls Master, and Nathaniel can’t see Kengo giving even half of a shit about him. That leaves Ichirou, which seems even more bizarre.

Other than the complaints he’s heard from Riko, the older Moriyama isn’t mentioned in the house at all. It’s like he doesn’t exist, as far as Riko is concerned. Riko hates Ichirou as much as he wants to be him. Nathaniel knows Riko is obsessed with the Main family, wants more than anything to be acknowledged by it and brought into the fold. He thinks a son would put him there, even though there’s no reason it would. Far more likely, the first son Nathaniel produced would be taken from them and raised in the Main family away from them. The small part of Nathaniel that can still feel is eternally grateful for the birth control Kevin keeps managing to smuggle in to him, even if he doesn’t know how long it’ll last. He couldn’t live with himself if that happened to any child of his.

Nathaniel gets up, sheets and comforter pooling in his lap. Thea looks him over, takes in the new bruises and cuts, but says nothing. She’s good at saying nothing, and Nathaniel would rather have her silence than her pity. She helps him get dressed, doesn’t comment about his stiffness or inability to bend over. It’s almost refreshing.

She dresses him in a tunic-style shirt that goes down to his thighs and black leggings underneath. It’s more feminine than he likes to dress himself, but it covers every part of him that matters so it’s tolerable. 

They go into the hallway and he isn’t surprised to see Kevin waiting there. Kevin looks him over, that raw hurt expression all over his face that Nathaniel’s learned to ignore. The look Kevin and Thea share is a surprise, but one Nathaniel can look past as well. His escorts take him down the stairs and to the back of the house, to an office Nathaniel has seen before, but never gone into. No one has, as far as he knows. It makes sense, if it belongs to the Main family.

Ichirou isn’t seated behind the desk like Nathaniel expects when Kevin opens the door. He’s sitting on the couch against the wall, not in a suit even though his clothes still look designer. Nathaniel thinks he’s supposed to look casual, but nothing about Ichirou Moriyama looks casual at all. 

“There you are,” Ichirou says. He stands up and moves to Nathaniel, taking his face in his hands and looking him over. It’s the same thing Riko always does when he’s been away from Nathaniel for too long. Unlike Riko however, there’s nothing other than polite interest in his face. He looks cold and calculating, like he’s looking Nathaniel over for usefulness. He certainly takes in the fading black eye and the mostly healed scar through Nathaniel’s left eyebrow but it doesn’t seem to faze him at all.

It’s almost a relief to be met with Ichirou’s cold indifference in the light of Riko’s obsession.

“I’ve heard quite a lot about you.” Ichirou makes the words sound like idle chatter, but Nathaniel knows better. This is the heir to the Moriyama crime syndicate. There’s nothing idle about this man. “Mostly from the Butcher, but word does travel north from time to time.” 

That, at last, elicits a reaction. Nathaniel shivers at the mention of his father, can’t help himself. There’s nothing he fears more than Nathan, still. A faint smile touches the corner of Ichirou’s mouth at the reaction he was looking for.

“My brother has plans for you, that much is evident,” he continues. He says _brother_ , but there’s no feeling in the word at all that Nathaniel can pick up. “But I think maybe you could be put to a better use. The Wesninskis have always belonged to the Main family and I don’t see why that shouldn’t be the case now.”

He finally lets Nathaniel go and moves back to his seat on the couch. Nathaniel follows him, helpless to do anything else. There’s something compelling about Ichirou Moriyama. Maybe it’s because Nathaniel can’t smell a single emotion coming off of him. It makes him too scared to be anything other than compliant. No one smells like _nothing_ , not to Nathaniel. Ichirou somehow manages it.

“You would lead a much happier life in the Main family. Just one son is all that’s required. I have a feeling you would produce daughters after, and those you can keep. We’ve no use for them until marriage contracts can be made up, of course. That would make you happy, wouldn’t it? Children you could keep and the respect afforded the mate of the head of the Main family? No more of the indignities suffered in the Branch.”

Nathaniel doesn’t realize he’s crying until Ichirou reaches out to wipe his cheeks. There’s no warmth in the gesture, only calculated movement. He feels detached from his body, unable to speak or move. Ichirou is offering him everything, _everything_ Nathaniel needs. He clearly knows about what’s happened at Castle Evermore, but doesn’t seem to care. He’ll take Nathaniel away from Riko and keep him _safe_ from the rest of the Branch. Riko couldn’t touch him, not if Ichirou claimed him, not if Nathaniel was _his_ , if—

Ichirou cradles Nathaniel’s cheek as he continues to cry. He’s no comfort, but Nathaniel can live with the cold. Anything to get him away from Riko. He’d do anything. _Anything_.

“Anything?” Ichirou murmurs. He smiles more fully, looking more satisfied than happy. “That’s good to hear.” 

Nathaniel suddenly wonders if Ichirou is doing this so he can take something else from Riko, if he cares enough about his younger brother to want to take something from him. It doesn’t matter to him, whatever Ichirou’s motivation, as long as it gets him out of _here_.

Ichirou stands and runs a hand over Nathaniel’s curls. He looks down at him for another moment, head tilted to the side like he’s studying everything about the Omega he possibly can. “I’ll discuss things with Father,” he says finally. It’s not a promise, not a guarantee, but it’s enough. Nathaniel nods and says nothing as Ichirou takes his leave.

It doesn’t take very long for Kevin to come into the office after. Thea isn’t with him, but that’s not surprising. Kevin has more freedoms than most in the manor. He sits down next to Nathaniel, reaches out to rub his back in actual comfort. Nathaniel still feels numbed, but more shocked numbness than the careful blankness he’s cultivated for the last year. 

“What did he want?” Kevin asks. He smells curious as well as worried, and it’s refreshing to be able to tell that after Ichirou’s non-scent. 

“He’s going to take me away,” Nathaniel lets himself say.

“ _No_!” Riko screams. He’s standing in the doorway, eyes wide and almost feral, body tense for a fight. 

Kevin immediately springs back from Nathaniel, stepping away. Nathaniel doesn’t feel anything looking at Riko. It doesn’t matter what the Alpha wants, not if Ichirou is going to claim him.

“Riko—” Kevin tries, but Riko cuts him off.

“He won’t take you from me, he _can’t_!” He rushes to the couch and grabs Nathaniel’s shoulders, shaking them and making Nathaniel’s head snap back. “You’re _mine_ , not his! Do you understand? You’ll never be his!” He’s snarling and spitting, more animal than man, but Nathaniel doesn’t care. Can’t. 

Again, Kevin tries to bring Riko back from the brink of sanity, reaching out to unlatch Riko’s hands from where they’re probably leaving new bruises on Nathaniel’s arms. Nathaniel watches, detached, as Riko turns his snarling hatred on Kevin.

“ _You_! You’ve always been jealous I have Nathaniel, haven’t you! You called him here, didn’t you? Put the idea into his head!” He sounds like a madman, spittle flying from his mouth to land on Kevin. The look in his eyes would be terrifying if Nathaniel could feel anything other than bone-deep relief.

Kevin’s eyes go wide and he takes a step back, shaking his head wildly. “Of course not! Riko! Why would he even speak to me? I’m Branch, not Main, Ichirou has _never_ made time for me, you know that!”

His obvious rationale does nothing for Riko’s terror mixed anger. Riko lets out a sound of such pure hatred and rage that Nathaniel instinctively flinches back and away, the small Omega voice in the back of his head telling him to run and hide and not let the Alphas know where he is. 

Riko slams into Kevin and follows him down to the floor when he stumbles against the desk and falls. There’s such dark rage on his face that even Kevin is whimpering, head back and neck exposed to try to appease the other Alpha. Riko doesn’t care though. He reaches out and grabs the first thing he feels at his fingertips, a heavy paperweight that fell off the desk when Kevin bumped into it. A smile spreads across his face when he hefts its weight in his hand.

“This will teach you to defy me,” he says. The look in his eyes is insane, there’s no other way to describe it. He lifts the weight into the air and brings it down onto Kevin’s left hand with a sickening crack. 

Kevin howls out his anguish as Riko brings the weight down again, making completely sure that the bones in Kevin’s hand are thoroughly broken. Riko stands up and watches as Kevin curls into himself, unable to stop the pained whimpers and sobs from coming out. He looks over his shoulder at Nathaniel and there’s nothing in his eyes but madness. It sends a shiver down Nathaniel’s spine. 

“You’ll be staying with me, Nathaniel,” he says easily, like he hasn’t just crushed the hand of the man who calls himself his brother. “You understand, don’t you?”

Nathaniel presses himself back against the couch as Riko moves closer to him, fear sour in the back of his throat for the first time in so long. 

He understands.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Monsters are introduced, but it's hard to think yourself a monster in the face of the truly monstrous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey! another chapter! this is surprising! this time andrew is 100% here, just like i promised. sorry for the delay.
> 
> so hey, i know i said last chapter that the worst was probably over for neil, but like...i lied? i didn't know i was, but when i started writing this, i came up with a whole bunch of other horrible shit that neil went through. it's not written flat-out in this chapter, just discussed, but it's still pretty brutal. sorry?
> 
> chapter warnings/spoilers: discussion of forced impregnation and miscarriages, implied/referenced past abuse, implied/referenced rape/gang rape, implied/referenced unethical medical practices, self-harm/suicidal thoughts and actions, nathaniel's whole fucked up little self. 
> 
> i can't guarantee i'll be able to get out the next chapter as quickly as the last two, but here's hoping! in case it isn't obvious from my admittedly flawed ability to write a timeline, it's been a little over three years since neil was first taken by riko. he's now 18, andrew is 19/going to turn 20, kevin is 22 going on 100. also the purpose of the Foxes is finally revealed! definitely not sports related even a little bit haha

Andrew inhales one last time on his cigarette before ashing it on the bottom of his boot and flicking it away. There’s no smoking allowed in Eden’s, but no one has the courage to call him out on it. Roland rolls his eyes when he sees him doing it, but the Beta is more interested in things other than curbing Andrew’s bad habits.

Speaking of, Andrew sidles up to the bar and puts in an order for a third round. They don’t always stay long enough for thirds, but Kevin has been especially annoying lately, and they all need a break from him. He watches the way Roland works, mixing and pouring drinks, with no small amount of interest. 

Betas are safe. They don’t demand anything, don’t rob Andrew of his faculties in any way. He’s never been tempted by an Alpha, no matter how good looking. He doesn’t trust them, can barely keep his even temper when around the ones he works with. Roland is more tolerable than most—he knows where to keep his hands and when to shut the fuck up. Andrew doesn’t have to worry about him.

He doesn’t have time to do anything fun, though. He shakes his head at Roland’s expression, shrugs when the Beta theatrically pouts. Kevin is in rare form tonight and Andrew has to babysit him.

The tray goes over his head as he walks the drinks back to their table. He’s short, but people get out of his way quickly enough. Between his elbow and his natural presence, people tend to steer clear. It’s how Andrew prefers it.

Nicky and Aaron are back at the table, taking a break from dancing and ready for more drinks. They’ve both indulged in a few crackers each, but neither of them have gone as overboard as Kevin. The Alpha is groaning and clutching an empty glass, head on the sticky table like he’d never allow sober.

“’Drew,” he moans, holding out the empty shot glass. “Drinks?”

Andrew rolls his eyes and portions out the drinks onto the table. Aaron is quick to snatch his up, clearly eager to get back onto the dance floor. Kevin is half a heartbeat slower in downing his own.

Nicky smiles and raises a glass to Andrew. “Thanks. You going to finally come out and join us for some dancing?” Andrew doesn’t know why Nicky bothers—some misplaced sense of guilt? A Beta’s desire to keep everyone happy? Andrew doesn’t care enough to bother finding out.

“Someone needs to babysit,” he says dryly, sipping at a whiskey that’s fairly decent. Compliments of Roland, of course.

The smile is replaced by an obvious look of concern when Nicky glances at the Alpha. “He’s drunk a lot more than usual lately, hasn’t he?” he asks softly. Or softly for a crowded club, anyway. He could shout for all it would matter. Kevin is so involved in his own melancholy he wouldn’t be able to hear it if Nicky was yelling right in his face. 

Andrew shrugs. He hasn’t been able to figure out Kevin’s current depressed mood, but he’s sure it’s more of the same. Paranoia over Riko coming back to get what’s his, more likely than not. 

“Try to have some fun,” Nicky says. He lays a hand on Andrew’s shoulder but doesn’t keep it there long. He knows better. Andrew tolerates it because Nicky is a good person, flighty personality aside. He loves Andrew, tries to protect him because he’s family. He did a lot to keep Andrew and Aaron together after their mother died, left his mate and home behind for them. He keeps _trying_ with Andrew, even though he’s always been shot down, and Andrew respects that a bit.

“Whatever,” he says back. Nicky takes Aaron and they go back to the dance floor, content to make fools of themselves in front of the rest of the crowd.

Andrew takes the time to study Kevin where he’s slumped over the table, a shot glass in each hand. He’s pathetic to the point of laughing, if Andrew ever did such a thing of his own volition.

Kevin came to them a few months after Andrew and his lot were signed over to Wymack. No one was eager to take on the Alpha, not with his attachments to the Moriyamas, but Abby had a soft heart and Wymack had a hard time turning away anything with a sob story. That’s how Andrew had been picked as well.

He was a wreck, hand broken and useless, a dull look in his eyes all the time. Andrew didn’t like drawing parallels between them, but he’d seen that broken look in the mirror before. It was curious, why Kayleigh Day’s son was coming to them after a crippling move from what had to be Riko.

Kayleigh Day was an Alpha, a venture capitalist, entrepreneur, philanthropist, and more before her death. Not a day went by in the news cycle without her name popping up, usually right next to her business partner Tetsuji Moriyama. She had her fingers in tech, business, sports. She only made more people interested in her when she had Kevin but refused to give up his father’s name. There was no point, she argued, when she was more than enough to raise Kevin. 

Kevin was in the headlines as much as Kayleigh, spotted at fancy private schools in England and sporting events in Ireland. It wasn’t unusual to see him at the side of Riko Moriyama, Tetsuji’s nephew and adopted son. The two were inseparable as children and the press junkets never failed to play the relationship up.

Kayleigh was loved by many, fierce and proudly Irish and undaunted by people telling her a female Alpha couldn’t run a business the way a male one could. She broke through female Alpha stereotypes left and right. She ran several, bought start-ups for tidy sums, invested in research in medicine and space exploration. She even had a crater on one of Jupiter’s moons named after her. She co-owned a football team with Tetsuji and was often seen with Kevin at games. There was no doubt she was an attentive and loving mother to her son.

All of that ended when she died in a freak car accident in Wales when Kevin was 11. Ironic, really, how both their mothers died due to faulty breaks. Andrew suspects no one tampered with Kayleigh’s breaks, however. Not that he would really know. With everything Tetsuji got up to, maybe she _was_ another victim of foul play. 

Kevin was sent to live with the Moriyamas after she died, Tetsuji named his godfather. He was hidden behind the doors of Evermore Castle, deeply in mourning for his mother and unable to face the rest of the world.

With time, headlines stopped focusing around Kevin and the inheritance he would come into when he turned 18. Things picked back up again once the Alpha actually came of age, speculation about who he would marry, how many children he would produce, what he would do to step out of the shadow of his mother.

Andrew snorts and tips the rest of his drink back. If only people could see Kevin now, broken and terrified of his _own_ shadow. Less an Alpha than any Andrew had ever seen. He wasn’t one to stereotype out of context, but Kevin could do with a little more spine and aggression. He was pathetic as is. If Eden’s clientele were the sort to know who Kevin was, Andrew would laugh at the headlines splashed everywhere about him in his sorry state.

He knows now what Kevin went through after being brought home by the Moriyamas, the horror that Riko really was outside the public gaze. Riko was like the opposite of Kevin. To the spectator, Riko was everything Kevin was supposed to be; involved in Tetsuji’s business ventures, one of the most eligible Alpha bachelors, never mind that he came from the Branch family and not the Main. Ichirou might stand to inherit the entire Moriyama business from their father, but Riko would become a CEO with time and command a respectable amount of power.

Not that that was nearly satisfying enough for the Alpha, Andrew knew. Tetsuji dealt in arms and drugs, something Riko would pick up once Tetsuji stepped down. But Riko wanted more than a piece of the pie. He wanted the whole damn thing. Ran around with his pack of personal bodyguards, his Ravens, trying to convince himself he was just as powerful as his brother. 

But Ichirou and the Main family dealt in things Riko couldn’t even fathom—wars and bodies and deals that would turn his little head. Andrew didn’t know how Kevin found out all he did about the Main family, but he suspects there are other secrets the Alpha isn’t giving up.

Secrets like why he’s been moping and drinking so hard the past week. Not even a full month into the new year and Kevin is already wallowing at the bottom. Pathetic, really. He’s always kept secrets, like why he ran to Wymack instead of going literally anywhere else. He had the money, that was for sure. Kayleigh’s fortune was vast and unquestionably his. If Andrew had that kind of money, he’d be gone forever.

Kevin had some distant relatives in Ireland from his mother’s side, but he didn’t run to them. Curiouser and curiouser. 

Plus, he seemed oddly close to Abby, even when he first showed up. Sure, she was the nurse that practically saved his hand since he refused to go to a hospital and risk the Moriyamas catching wind of where he was. But that didn’t explain the way he would sometimes walk into a room and find the Alpha and Beta in heated discussion, heads tilted together and voices quiet.

Andrew was a suspicious person by nature. He couldn’t help it. Not after the way he grew up, the things he experienced. He found there very few people he could trust, and when they hid secrets, it was harder still.

Wymack, he could trust, probably. He’d thought the man an Alpha at first, with his tattoos and posturing and the way the Judge actually looked at him with respect. He was surprised to take a good sniff and realize he was a Beta. That went a long way towards trusting him, later, even though Andrew thought it was stupid to trust based on gender distinction.

The Beta had pleaded his case, even though he didn’t know Andrew; had guaranteed he’d help rehabilitate Andrew into a productive member of society, somehow. What had happened wasn’t his fault, couldn’t be in his control, not with the medication he’d been put on. Attacking those Alphas was a natural instinct, but the violence with which he’d done it was because of the toxic cocktail in him.

Andrew knew Wymack was wrong, even then, even coming down off the meds he’d been forced to take since he left juvie. He’d attacked those Alphas because they were hurting Nicky, trying to take away what was _his_ to defend. The blind rage wasn’t brought on by the medication—he was, at the deepest core of himself, filled with a dark anger. When he wasn’t high and smiling, all he felt was anger. That was what he’d go back to, once the meds were fully out of his system.

But the Judge listened to Wymack’s arguments and agreed. He’d place Andrew in his custody and arrange for the Beta to care for Andrew’s needs. Andrew’d hated the man, unsure of his motives and untrusting. But when Wymack agreed to take on Nicky and Aaron, to get them enrolled in school with scholarships and housing, Andrew agreed to his stupid terms. Therapy weekly with a soft Beta and community outreach with Wymack. 

Wymack ran some sort of halfway house for freaks like Andrew, he learned later. Alphas and Betas and the very occasional Omega who needed help out of a dire situation. He’d get them housing, schooling, counselling if they needed that. Andrew didn’t know what drove a man like Wymack—a man whose cause was co-founded and funded by Kayleigh Day herself, and maybe _that_ was why Kevin ran to him—to do the things he did. He couldn’t guess at the Beta’s motivations at all. Surely, he had some sob story as well, but he hadn’t cared to share it.

As it was, the Foxhole Court, as he’d named it, some in joke with Kayleigh Andrew didn’t get, was full of rejects like Andrew. Dan was Wymack’s right-hand-woman, poised to take over operation of the foundation once he decided to retire. Matt was her ever-devoted mate, Renee head of community outreach and bible study. Allison was a benefactor-cum-burgeoning advocate and her on-again-off-again boyfriend Seth worked as muscle to keep the more scared clientele safe. Abby was their in-house nurse practitioner and Betsy their counsellor. Nicky and Aaron did something involved with tutoring, or maybe arts and crafts, fuck if Andrew knew. Kevin was still a wreck and had zero people skills, and Andrew stared blankly at anyone asking him to do anything. Just because he was nominally in Wymack’s care didn’t mean he had to actually participate in their pity party.

He had his own problems, and keeping his family and Kevin safe was enough to deal with. Especially Kevin, who seemed determined to pickle his own liver before the month was out. Kevin was convinced Riko would come back for him at some point, to force him to go back to Evermore and do…something, Andrew wasn’t sure. Something dire, apparently. Kevin was always so doom and gloom when he talked about Riko and his life at Evermore. 

Sure, he’d had it rough, but Andrew wasn’t sympathetic. Kevin could have gotten out sooner, done something with himself. Instead, it took a broken hand for him to run and cower behind Wymack’s back.

They’d made a deal, though, and Andrew always kept his deals, no matter what. Other people might break them or think he wasn’t serious—a certain twin came to mind—but Andrew lived or died by his word.

“Will you drown in your own tears if I leave you alone to go to the bathroom?” Andrew asks. 

Kevin is still face-down on the table but he raises his hand to flick Andrew off. It’s his left one, which is amusing. Kevin usually forgets he’s broken when he’s this wasted. He doesn’t like showing off his scars, but they’re clear in the lights of the club. White and messy against his tanned skin. Not bad, even if Andrew could show him a collection to put them to shame.

“Good enough.”

Andrew takes his time on the way to the bathroom. Aaron and Nicky are easy to spot in the crowd, closer to the edge than the middle. Neither of them can drink, but both of them are high and drunk enough that it doesn’t seem to matter. Andrew snorts over their idiocy. How he’s related to them, he still hasn’t really figured out. Switched at birth, he must’ve been.

There’s no line for the bathroom even though there’s an Alpha in all black leather standing outside it looking suspicious. He eyes Andrew but wisely doesn’t say or do anything to piss him off. Probably lookout for someone doing drugs. Not that they need to bother, Eden’s isn’t a place that cares about things like that.

He pushes in and wrinkles his nose at the stench inside. Even worse than usual, somehow. Sex and sweat and piss and something else under it all. Andrew tries to ignore it as he goes to the urinal, pissing quickly and then moving to the sink. 

There’s a kid there already, huddled in on himself against the wall. He’s a source of some of the smell, though when Andrew gets closer, the smell takes on a distinct layer of terror. Andrew washes his hands slowly, blatantly watching the kid in the mirror.

Something is off about him, about the way he smells. He absolutely _reeks_ of Alpha, maybe even more than one. But under that, there’s something else. Something Andrew hasn’t smelled in a long time. 

He places it just as the Alpha from outside pushes his way in. “Come on, _Princess_. Birthday girl can’t spend the whole night crying in the bathroom, can she?”

Andrew feels his rage break through the usual nothingness. The Alpha doesn’t seem to clock on, but the kid does, whimpering and pressing himself further into the corner. It lets Andrew get a better look at him, the wide terrified blue eyes, the bruises clear on his arms. There’s something tattooed next to his left eye and an ornate collar wrapped around his throat. Andrew somehow doubts it’s there by choice.

The Alpha must get impatient, because he takes another step into the bathroom, door swinging shut behind him. “I said come _on_ ,” he growls, reaching out. He doesn’t seem to notice or care about Andrew watching what’s happening.

It’s enough to make Andrew act, before he even thinks about it. He swings at the Alpha, punches him square in the jaw and watches in satisfaction as he goes down. He’s fought Alphas before, though, knows that’s not nearly enough to keep him down. Andrew kicks the Alpha in the stomach, revelling in his pained groan, then kicks him once in the temple. The Alpha’s head snaps to the side and he’s out. He’s not dead, even though he probably deserves it. Andrew doesn’t need to deal with a death right now.

He looks away from the Alpha, back to the kid who has slid down against the wall, arms around his head to protect him from a blow. Andrew isn’t surprised his first reaction is defense when two Alphas start fighting. Omegas are usually good at self-preservation.

“Sorry. He seemed like the type not to take no for an answer,” Andrew says. He desperately wants a cigarette. That would keep the feelings still coursing through him there instead of letting them fade away into the nothingness again.

The Omega slowly lowers his arms and looks up at Andrew. There’s something in his eyes that say he’s ready for whatever Andrew plans to do to him. That he’s used to being in this sort of position, at the mercy of someone else. It rankles at Andrew, makes his hackles raise in clear distaste.

“Are you okay?” The kid obviously isn’t, and Andrew absolutely hates small talk like this. He’s not Renee, doesn’t handle the delicate ones who need a soft voice and caring eyes. But he’s all that’s available, so the kid’ll just have to deal.

“There are others,” he says, voice all fucked up like he’s been smoking constantly, or doing something else that just makes Andrew’s anger flare sharp and hot. He flinches at whatever he can smell coming off of Andrew, and fuck, of course, Omegas have an acute sense of smell when it comes to emotions, don’t they? And this one just had to get him at the time when he felt _anything_. “You need to go before they find you here.”

Andrew snorts. “Then what? They’ll think you did that?” He gestures at the unconscious Alpha behind him. “Think that’ll go over for you very well?” 

The kid looks behind Andrew at the fallen Alpha for longer than is probably smart if he’s right about there being others. He looks back at Andrew and his skin crawls at how _empty_ he looks.

“What do you want?” he asks dully. Like whatever Andrew comes up with will just be the same strain of awful as everything else.

Andrew grins but he knows it’s an awful looking thing. A remnant of his medicated days when he couldn’t do anything but. “Nothing,” he says.

The Omega smiles back, the same kind of diseased and horrible thing on Andrew’s face. “Then you found it.”

Dramatic. Kevin will like that. So will Dan. She always tends to go for the dramatic ones, and there isn’t anyone as dramatic in the world as Kevin Day. Maybe this pet project will cheer him up out of his funk.

“Come on,” he says and holds out a hand. He won’t touch the Omega, not without permission. He almost doubts the kid can give it, but is still slightly surprised when his hand is taken and he hauls him up. The Omega is light, lighter than his distinction should account for. He’s bound to have another sob story Abby will fall all over as she tries to fatten him up. “I know somewhere safe you can stay for a while.”

He thinks he hears the kid say something about nowhere being safe, but Andrew is too busy concentrating on what’s waiting outside the bathroom for them. No strange Alphas in leather, not yet. No wayward brother or cousin either, when he looks around. He heads straight for their table, the kid still holding tightly onto his hand and following behind.

What’s waiting for him at the table makes his blood go cold and then very, very hot. There’s a quick whiff of fear from behind him when his anger spikes, but he ignores it.

“Riko,” he says. He’s going for jovial but he’s sure he falls somewhere far from it.

The Alpha is standing over Kevin, leaning down like Judas at the Last Supper, hand on Kevin’s shoulder. Kevin is hunched in his seat obviously terrified. Aaron and Nicky are behind them not being held back by the Ravens standing next to them but only just. Riko’s eyes flash from Andrew to the Omega behind him and his smile gets wider and crueller.

“Look at that. Kevin’s mutt bringing mine to heel. How fun.” His voice is just as obnoxious as Andrew remembers when he turned the Alpha down the first time. “Look, Kevin. I’m sure you didn’t forget our birthday boy’s special day. Isn’t that why you’re out celebrating?”

The kid is shaking in his grip and Andrew doesn’t have to have a keen nose to be able to pick up on the misery coming off him. 

“Hey, Riko,” Andrew says, grinning. Riko knew him when he was forced to smile, knows that him doing it now means nothing but danger. “Don’t touch what’s mine.”

Riko laughs but lets Kevin go instantly. “I could say the same to you, Minyard.”

Andrew would say something back, but he’s distracted by the way Kevin’s gone stiff and sick looking. He’s staring at the Omega behind Andrew, eyes wide and despairing. He positively _reeks_ of guilt and oh, more secrets.

“ _Nathaniel_ ,” he says desperately. 

“I brought him here as a special surprise for his birthday!” Riko sounds cheerful, but Andrew can read the way he’s tracking Kevin’s reactions. This was a calculated attack, against Kevin and possibly the Omega from the sick tangle of anger and misery coming from his back. “It would be the best present if you would come home with us, right Nathaniel? You want Kevin to come back, don’t you?”

The Omega lets out a choked noise, no words, but he doesn’t need them to make Kevin’s face go that particular shade of pale. If Andrew isn’t careful, he’s going to be leaving this club with one less Alpha, and that’s unacceptable. He has promises to keep, after all. 

“As lovely as this family reunion is sure to be, I’m afraid we have to leave,” he says. Riko flicks his gaze to Andrew, but dismisses him just as quickly. It’s enough for Andrew to move.

He pushes the Omega back, away from Riko and his Ravens. He saw Roland back there, making his way to figure out what’s going on, and is satisfied when he hears the Beta grunt at the impact. Riko’s head snaps up at the disturbance, but Andrew is already moving. He takes in Nicky and Aaron setting on the Alphas around them. They might never have the ability Andrew does, but both of them have been practising with Renee since the attack on Nicky, and they’re sneaky little bastards.

Other patrons who see a brawl starting immediately join in, especially when they see who’s in the middle of it. Kevin might not be known around these parts, but Nicky and his cousins are. With everyone sufficiently distracted, that leaves Riko for Andrew.

The other Alpha snarls, not looking at Andrew but behind him, where the Omega is. He’s not paying attention to Andrew and that’s his first mistake. Well, his first one is coming anywhere near Andrew and what’s his. This will just be his last one.

He tackles Riko to the ground, already punching before the Alpha has a chance to defend himself. Andrew’s a great brawler, all power and very little finesse with his fists. He gets in a good few hits before Riko retaliates. By then, Andrew has a blade out, pressed against Riko’s neck. Riko goes stock-still, and he’s all but radiating hatred at Andrew. Stinks of it.

“Here’s how this is going to go,” Andrew says softly. His skin is crawling at the thought of being this close to another person, an Alpha, but he makes himself stay still and lean closely so Riko pays attention. “You’re going to take your little bodyguards and you’re going to fuck off. If I ever see you in my town again, I’ll slit your throat. Do you understand?”

Andrew doesn’t lie and he doesn’t exaggerate. He makes promises.

Riko narrows his eyes. “I’m going to _kill_ you, you fucking—” 

A quick rabbit punch is enough to have Riko gasping and curling up around his throat, trying to breathe. There’s a chance Andrew did something enough to kill the Alpha, but he doubts it. He gets up, gives Riko one last kick for good luck, and then looks around.

Aaron has a split lip, but other than that, he and Nicky look fine. There are a few bouncers around the Alphas, bigger and nastier and far more willing to crack a few heads instead of calling cops, especially when a threat to Nicky is made again. Andrew has a brief flash of murderous intent over whoever touched Aaron, but he lets it go. He looks around for Kevin and isn’t surprised to see him towering over the quivering Omega, hands up and talking rapidly and quietly.

Roland looks pale and decidedly less cheerful as he makes eye contact with Andrew. “I think you should probably take the back entrance,” he says. 

“Probably for the best.” Andrew herds Aaron and Nicky over to Kevin, then hurries them and the Omega out the door marked _Staff Only_. 

Kevin is hovering around the kid, but he’s not touching, and oh, maybe he _can_ learn after all. Andrew makes the executive decision to put the kid in the passenger seat while the other three go to the back. He looks over the hood of the car before Kevin can climb inside and grins at him. He knows it’s not a friendly expression.

“You’ve got explaining to do, Day,” he says faux-cheerfully.

Kevin goes pale again but he nods, licks his lips. He gets into the car without saying anything. Andrew slides into the driver’s seat and steels himself for an hour of trying to ignore the scent of spent adrenaline and terror.

-

Wymack doesn’t seem thrilled to be woken up at 3 in the morning by Andrew of all people, if his gruff, “ _what?_ ” when he picks up is anything to go by. He’s quick to direct them to the Court when Andrew tells him there was a confrontation with Riko. Andrew hangs up before Wymack can ask any questions, unwilling to have to repeat himself later.

The Omega is a stinking lump in the passenger seat and Andrew has to stop himself from covering his nose. He’s sure the three in the back can smell something wrong with him, but none of them have his delicate sense of smell. 

Every time he looks into the rear-view mirror, Kevin is a mix between terrified, anxious, and hopeful. No one is following them, which is a bit of a surprise. They did technically just steal an Omega that clearly belongs to an Alpha, even if Andrew can’t smell a mate mark. The kid stinks of too many Alphas to be bonded to just one. Probably the cops were called after Andrew and his lot left, and Riko’s smoothing things over with them.

He doesn’t think anything will happen to Riko, if police were called. The Moriyamas have corrupted far better cops than the ones in Columbia, South Carolina. Andrew has no doubt that if push came to shove, Riko’s uncle will swoop in and save the day with a donation or two.

They pull up to the Rec Centre turned foundation headquarters and everyone leaves the car. Kevin has to coax the Omega—Nathaniel, had they called him?—to follow him into the building. More and more questions are burning their way through his tongue, Andrew keeps pace behind them. He’s acutely aware of the way Nathaniel tracks his presence.

Wymack hasn’t made it yet, so Kevin pulls Nathaniel towards the room Abby usually uses for her primary nursing duties. He looks at the three of them over his shoulder and says, “Aaron and Nicky, wait out here. Andrew, come.”

Mutt jokes aside, Andrew very much isn’t a leashed dog. Nicky says something before he can, however.

“What the fuck, Kevin? We just got into a fight with Riko and his goons. Who the fuck is that? How do you know him?” Good questions. He sounds pissed, which is surprising of the Beta. He’s usually so cheerful. 

Aaron doesn’t seem to care one way or the other, poking at his lip carefully to assess the damage. Andrew doesn’t miss the way he eyes Kevin and the Omega, however, obviously curious.

Andrew looks at Kevin blankly until the Alpha huffs and rolls his eyes. “I don’t have time to deal with you,” he says, prissy. Andrew’s surprised he’s sobered up enough to be his awful self.

He’s surprised by the Omega pushing Kevin away, wrapping his arms around himself. In the light of the Court, he looks half-starved and feral. His clothes cling to him, but Andrew is sure it’s not a fashion choice. His hair is lanky and not properly cut and the bruises are even more obvious on his arms and face in proper lighting. 

“Leave me alone,” he says. His voice is still fucked out and Andrew has to stop himself from clenching his fists. “You made a stupid mistake. Riko’s going to come here for me, and for you, too. Why’d you have to put your nose in things?”

He doesn’t actually sound curious, just resigned. 

“Nathaniel,” Kevin says, reaching out. He doesn’t touch, still. Andrew’s almost impressed. “ _Please_.”

“You know I hate that word,” Andrew drawls. He’s getting bored of this game.

Nathaniel looks up at him, clearly more afraid of Andrew than Kevin. That’s a wise choice to make. Andrew is infinitely more dangerous than Kevin. Then he does something confusing. He looks at Aaron, inhales deeply, then looks back at Andrew, clearly assessing them both. Andrew wonders if he’s going to say something about them, but then the doors to the Court open and Wymack bustles in, Abby at his side.

The appearance of the two makes Nathaniel go stiff, eyes widening. Fear pours off him in thick waves, making Andrew want to gag at the smell. Over Wymack, he would get, but Nathaniel’s eyes are on Abby, not him. What could Nathaniel possibly fear from their nurse?

“ _Nathaniel_!” Abby shouts. She rushes in towards Nathaniel and sweeps him into a hug despite the Omega’s clear reluctance and fear. Andrew starts towards them, but she pulls away, holds Nathaniel out at arm’s length. “Oh my god, it’s you, isn’t it?” She looks at Kevin in clear question. 

“Riko showed up at Eden’s Twilight,” Kevin says, standing up straight. Something about Abby always made him act on his best behavior. 

So, the nurse knows the kid, too? More questions, less answers than before. Andrew is tired of it.

“I have the sneaking suspicion I’ve been lied to,” he says to Kevin. “You know how I feel about liars. I don’t feel particularly protective of liars.”

Kevin goes pale and he swallows, stinking of anxiety. “I didn’t lie,” he says quickly. “I just never told you about this.” 

“A lie of omission.”

“Kevin is good at those,” Nathaniel says with no little bitterness. Andrew flicks a glance at him, then back to Kevin.

“Nathaniel, I’m sorr—” He cuts himself off with a quick look at Andrew. “I’ve been trying to figure out a way to get you out since I left, I promise. But you’ve been so carefully guarded, Riko never lets you out of his sight—” 

“What would you know about that?” Nathaniel asks. The fear from seeing Abby is gone, replaced with the sharp scent of his anger. It’s refreshing. For Andrew, at least. “You were all gone, you all _left_ , so how would you know about _anything_?”

“Nathaniel!”

“Someone needs to start explaining, real fast,” Wymack interrupts. He’s looking between Kevin, Abby, and Nathaniel, eyes narrowed. Clearly this is new to him as well. Fascinating. “Before I kick everyone out and go back to bed.” It’s a hollow threat. Wymack wouldn’t kick any of them out, especially such a sorely used Omega as Nathaniel obviously is. His mothering instincts must be kicking into overdrive just looking at the kid.

“Will you let me examine you?” Abby asks Nathaniel softly, still holding onto his wrist. “You don’t look well, Nathaniel.”

Nathaniel wrenches his arm free and tucks it against his chest, sneering. Andrew can tell it’s a cover for his fear, though. “What’s it to you? Just trying to make sure I’m function for Riko again?”

Abby looks hurt by the words instead of confused and Andrew growls. He’s tired of not knowing what’s going on.

“ _What_?” Wymack barks out. “Son, I don’t know what you’re trying to insinuate about Abby, but she’d never—” 

“Wymack,” she says softly. She reaches out to put a hand on the Beta’s hand, instantly calming him. “It’s not his fault. Nathaniel has no reason to think very kindly of me, I’m afraid.”

Andrew takes the opportunity of their distraction to corner Kevin into a wall, hands going for his throat. “If you don’t start explaining,” he says over the shouts of the others, “I’m going to choke the answers out of you.” It’s not an idle threat, promise of protection or not. Andrew _hates_ being in the dark.

Kevin’s eyes go wide and he tilts his head back and to the side. The gesture is useless to Andrew, but he still backs off, knows Kevin will be too afraid not to talk.

“Let’s take a seat,” Wymack says. He’s clearly trying to diffuse the situation.

They all go to the lounge and take their seats. Nicky and Aaron take their place at Andrew’s side on the Monster’s couch, but Kevin opts to sit in the seat closest to the one Nathaniel curls up in. Abby and Wymack take the loveseat and Andrew suspects they’re holding hands out of sight.

One look at Kevin is enough to make him talk. “I knew about Abby through my mom’s work,” he starts. “I knew that she worked with disadvantaged people, getting them healthcare and medication they didn’t have access to. I contacted her when Nathaniel came to live with us at Castle Evermore and asked for a steady supply of contraceptives.”

Nicky takes in a sharp breath but doesn’t open his mouth to interrupt.

That comes from Nathaniel. 

“ _Came to live with you_ ,” he sneers. “Still so diplomatic. Do you mean when you and Riko killed my mom and kidnapped me?” The tension in the room immediately goes up and all eyes are turned to Kevin.

The Alpha sputters. “I had nothing to do with your mother, you know that. And you know how Riko is! I didn’t have a choice when he took you. What could I have done?” He’s quiet like he’s expecting an answer from the Omega, but Nathaniel says nothing. Sighing, Kevin continues. 

“Riko planned to get Nathaniel pregnant. It was for some plot to rise up to the Main family. I never knew the full details, but Riko was obsessed with it.” He shares a look with Abby. “We knew it wasn’t a choice Nathaniel wanted for himself, so Abby helped him.”

“I wouldn’t call making me go into heat helping.” Nathaniel doesn’t seem to care about the spectators to his past. He’s clearly had this bottled inside him for a long time. At least he isn’t the whimpering mess he was back at the club. It’s good to see some anger from him.

Abby frowns. “Working with Doctor Smith got me access to patients who needed my help. If I wasn’t his nurse, it would have been someone else, maybe someone who didn’t care about your health and wellbeing. Working with him was a necessary evil.” Wymack nudges her shoulder in a show of support, but even he’s frowning.

“We both did what we could to keep you safe,” Kevin says, leaping to her defense. 

Nathaniel’s anger smells hot and sharp in Andrew’s nose. Mixed with it is Kevin’s sorrow and regret, Abby’s fear. But the Omega’s is still the sharpest scent, even when it turns inward.

“ _Safe_ ,” he spits out. “You _left_ , all of you. How was I supposed to be safe all alone?” He curls in on himself in his seat, nails digging into the fabric over his arms. Andrew catches the faintest whiff of blood over the miasma of their emotions.

Kevin’s swamp of grief overwhelms anything else. “I told you, we were going to escape. I was planning things, with Thea and Abby and Jean. But after Riko broke my hand…” he cradles the scarred thing against his chest like he can still feel the pain of the shattered bones. Maybe he can. Andrew isn’t interested in his guilt, though. Just the reason behind it. 

“He went crazy, kept you locked up in his room 24/7, none of us were allowed to see you. We couldn’t get you out, but it was too dangerous to stay. He suspected one of us contacted Ichirou and he didn’t trust us anymore. We had to leave, to make it to the safe houses we’d set up throughout the country.

“If we hadn’t left, there’s no telling what he would have done…”

“Sure there is,” Nathaniel says. He’s smiling, a nasty thing that slices through his face like an open wound. “I know exactly what he did after you left.” He reaches up to touch the tattoo by his eye and in the better light, they can all see it’s a stylized R. Then his fingers move to his collar, tight against his throat. “This was just so others would know who I belong to as soon as they set their eyes on me. I can show you what he kept private, for himself. Would you like to see?”

Andrew has never seen Kevin look both so close to tears and so close to throwing up.

“You don’t get to look away, Kevin. Not after you abandoned me. All of you. You left me there, alone, to Riko and his Ravens.” The stinking hate that comes off Nathaniel at that word confirms what Andrew suspected in the club.

Abby’s hands fly up to cover her mouth. Her eyes are full and tears spill out over her cheeks. “Oh, Nathaniel. I’m so sorry. With no one inside, I couldn’t get your supplies to you. It must’ve been over a year. How did you…” She trails off.

“Did you give birth?” Wymack asks gruffly. He ignores the choked noise Kevin makes. Andrew knows he’s dealt with court cases involving getting children away from abusive situations after one parent escapes. It’s hard, would be even harder with an Omega involved. Doubly so if the father is Riko Moriyama.

Nathaniel’s anger seems to leave him all at once. What’s left is the bitter stench of sadness. “No. Not for lack of trying.” He wraps his arms tightly around his stomach. “I used what pills I had left, but they didn’t last long. I…miscarried. Twice.” He laughs, a humorless thing. “Riko was angrier when I lost them than he was when I couldn’t conceive at all.” 

Abby is openly weeping now. Wymack has an arm around her, trying to comfort her, but the Beta is obviously distraught and his own fury is hard to miss. She’s not the only one. Nicky is curled in on himself, his sorrow at Nathaniel’s situation evident. Aaron is stunned and leaves to go to another part of the Court, phone out. Kevin actually gets up and rushes to the bathroom. Andrew can smell the waft of bile after he throws up.

Nathaniel turns his empty gaze onto Andrew. What’s reflected there is something Andrew sees in his own mirror every day—absolutely nothing. He doesn’t feel sorry for the Omega. They all have their sob stories. Andrew’s lack of pity seems to strengthen Nathaniel and he turns back to watch Kevin when he returns to the lounge. The stink of his sour stomach is enough to curl Andrew’s lip, but he refuses to acknowledge the Alpha’s feelings. 

“Nathaniel,” he says, dropping down onto the floor by the Omega’s chair. “Nathaniel, you have to know how sorry I am. I never meant for this to happen, I just couldn’t—”

“Your apologies really mean nothing, Kevin,” Nathaniel says hollowly. “Riko will come for me soon and you’ll be lucky if he doesn’t take you, too.” He hesitates for a second, then clenches his fists. “I’m glad to know Thea and Jean aren’t dead. Riko had implied…but he likes to tell me things that hurt.” 

Wymack stands up and Nathaniel’s eyes immediately track him. He doesn’t look scared, but something wary in his expression piques Andrew’s attention. “There’s no way that’ll happen,” the Beta is saying as he crosses his arms over his chest. The tribal tattoos look ridiculous in his pajamas. “We have legal resources here to keep you safe. Riko can’t lay a hand on you if you don’t want him to.”

Nathaniel smiles that nasty gash again. “Riko has a contract with my name on it, signed by my Alpha father.”

It’s tricky, but not impossible. Wymack has fought and won cases just as hard. Maybe. Andrew doesn’t care about that. What he cares about is what Wymack is implying. Andrew might have been the one to stop that Alpha in the bathroom, and he certainly orchestrated their escape from Eden’s. But that didn’t mean he was trying to take in another stray. Especially one that would come with so much danger attached. He didn’t particularly care for Kevin, but he’d made a promise.

“There are other safe houses,” he says before anyone else can reply. “Ones that don’t have Kevin Day in them.” 

Kevin shoots him a venomous look. “He’s not being sent away. It’s safer if he’s here.” Safer for who, he doesn’t say. Certainly not himself. Dawning realization that maybe Kevin _isn’t_ the pitiful coward he seems to be.

“You want me to protect him.”

A nod. 

“Why should I?”

“We have a deal.”

“One that does not cover misplaced Omegas.”

Kevin bites his lip and looks at Nathaniel. “If he goes, I go.” It’s a threat, but not an idle one. He knows Andrew won’t break their deal, but leaving with Kevin means breaking others. Fuck.

Andrew points at Kevin. “You are making it harder to keep you safe. Riko will come for him. You are putting yourself in those crosshairs.” 

“Do I get a say in this?” Nathaniel asks suddenly.

“Of course you do,” Abby says quickly, wiping at her face. “If you’re not comfortable here, we have connections to other places.” She hesitates for a moment before barreling on. “Thea in Houston and Jean in Los Angeles. They’d both be more than happy to take you in, I think.”

Nathaniel lets out another one of those unhappy laughs. Kevin winces and ducks his head but the Omega pays him no mind. “Can I have more than ten seconds to decide?” 

“Take all the time you need,” Wymack says.

They disband as a group, Abby going to collect herself with Wymack, Nicky going to check up on Aaron. Kevin stays by Nathaniel’s side even though the Omega doesn’t look at him once. Andrew decides he needs a smoke.

The Court has a second floor with rooms for people who need somewhere safe to sleep. It also has a roof access door that Andrew jimmied open his first day there. The roof’s not nearly high enough to make him feel the kind of fear he desires, but it’s still enough to make something tug at his stomach when he sits at the edge and lights up. 

Nathaniel is a problem. He’ll stay, that much is obvious. Even if Andrew has to hook a leash to that collar and keep him locked up. That means Andrew’s job is not a lot harder. Keeping Kevin safe, keeping his brother and Nicky safe, will be much more difficult with a raging megalomaniac breathing down their necks. 

The door opening catches his attention but the whiff of clinging sadness is enough to tell him who it is.

“Not safe up here. You could fall and break your delicate little neck.” 

Nathaniel sits down next to Andrew and leans over the side to look down at the ground. Instinct has Andrew catching the back of his shirt and pulling him back. Nathaniel looks back at him. “Not high enough for that.” He sounds pretty sure of himself.

Andrew exhales into his face then waves his cigarette next to the Omega’s tattoo when that doesn’t get him a reaction. “Something tells me you’re pretty familiar with the things that might kill you.”

Another one of those ghastly smiles. “Omegas are actually pretty sturdy, when it comes to pregnancy. Only a few things can force a miscarriage.” He turns his left arm over and Andrew can see the long scar running up his vein. Looking for a way out with that one, not just a source of pain to bring him back. “Shock from blood loss. The body gets rid of anything that might hurt its ability to stay alive at that point.”

“I’m guessing you couldn’t get away with that twice,” Andrew says blandly. His own scars under his armbands look just as nasty. He’s not easily impressed.

Nathaniel’s face shuts down. He looks back out over the parking lot and the empty field where Renee is trying to start a community garden while his hand goes to his abdomen. “No. The second time, Riko had me watched constantly. He forced me to stay alive. Had me put on a feeding tube when I tried to starve myself.” A crooked smile. “Doctor Smith wasn’t that bad, all said and done. There are much worse, out there.”

He spreads his fingers out along the edge of the roof. “Kevin left all his things behind when he ran. All his stupid history books. Useful when they’re about the history of Medieval medicine and herbal lore. No one notices when an Omega picks flowers in a garden, especially not a pregnant one. Nesting does weird things to our instincts, everyone knows that.” Nathaniel turns to look at Andrew again. “Queen Anne’s lace is pretty, but very toxic when ingested, turns out.”

The end of his cigarette burns his fingers and Andrew hisses, throwing the thing away. He immediately lights another, inhales once and then ashes it. A second cigarette tastes better, but the third doesn’t leave his mouth tasting foul so he settles for it. Nathaniel watches him go through the cigarettes and says nothing.

Andrew can imagine what Nathaniel had to go through, how his body would be wracked with pain and turn against him. The blood that would stain the sheets and the hours spent waiting to find out if it worked. He doesn’t really have to imagine when he’s got the memory he does. He’s seen a miscarriage, before.

He doesn’t ask anything stupid like if Nathaniel is okay. He doesn’t say he’s sorry, because he’s not. Andrew certainly didn’t have anything to do with it. A small part of his mind whispers that maybe he would have been there first hand if he’d accepted Riko’s offer of the Ravens, but he dismisses that easily enough. He hadn’t wanted anything to do with Riko and his band of thugs

“Let’s make a deal,” Andrew says instead. 

“What kind of deal?” Nathaniel tilts his head to the side. His eyes are very blue in the moonlight and his hair looks silvery. Andrew would say it was almost magical, if he believed in bullshit like that. 

“You’ll stay here and let Kevin assuage himself of his guilt, and I’ll keep you safe.” 

Nathaniel hesitates. “Can I ask you a question?”

“You can, but there’s no guarantee I’ll answer.”

The Omega reaches up to tug on his bottom lip, a nervous gesture if Andrew’s ever seen one. He doesn’t need to be able to smell the anxiety coming off him to know how he feels. “Your brother…he’s a Beta, isn’t he?”

Andrew stares at Nathaniel and takes a drag from his cigarette. His brother’s past is his own to tell.

The silence makes Nathaniel hesitate again, but he pushes past it. “But you’re not.”

“I’m not.” Andrew doesn’t lie, and he’s not a Beta.

“How is one twin born a Beta while the other is an Alpha?”

Andrew flicks his cigarette off the edge of the roof. He doesn’t need to watch it to know where it lands. He stands up and brushes the gravel and dirt from his pants. He looks down at Nathaniel.

“A very good question.”

-

Andrew heads back to the lounge where everyone is very obviously impatiently waiting for them. He’s not surprised that Nathaniel follows closely behind him, or that the Omega murmurs, “it’s a deal” before they rejoin the others.

“I’ll stay here,” Nathaniel tells them. 

Abby and Kevin are both relieved, even if Andrew can still smell guilt on them. 

“That’s great news,” Abby says. “We’ll make up a bed for you here, just until we can figure out something a little more permanent.” She ignores the way Kevin bristles and immediately raises his hand. “It’s nearly time for us to open up anyway, so David and I will stay here while you get some rest. You don’t have to worry, Nathaniel, you’re perfectly safe here.”

“He should stay with us—” Kevin starts.

“No non-students allowed in the dorms,” Wymack cuts him off. “You know the rules. Now it’s time for you all to go. Straight back home, if you will. No more run-ins with known criminals, please.”

Kevin looks like he wants to argue some more, but Andrew’s had enough. He herds the Alpha towards the door, shoots a look to Nicky and Aaron that has both Betas scrambling. Kevin’s shoulders slump when he realizes he’s lost this argument.

“We’ll be back after classes,” he says weakly. He really doesn’t get to decide where Andrew goes, and there’s no guarantee Aaron and Nicky will want to tag along, either. Andrew has a feeling he’s not going to have much choice about this, though. 

Wymack waves them off and they leave, Nathaniel standing between the two Betas like some forlorn ghost trapped in place. Nothing about the situation sits well with Andrew, but there’s nothing more he can do about it. He made a deal.

He immediately crawls into his bed when they get back to the dorms and stares up at the ceiling where Nicky stuck some glow-in-the-dark stars on a drunken whim one night. Kevin is grumbling in his bed across the room and he can hear Aaron and Nicky getting ready to go to sleep down the hall. 

Andrew closes his eyes and refuses to let himself think about anything other than the darkness behind his lids.


	4. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Questions are answered. We learn that horrible lives are not unique to one person alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey! another chapter. go team me. i don't know if i'm going to keep this steady pace (my birthday is sunday, and by this schedule, i should have another chapter up then? but idk if i will!) or if i'll keep the formula of two neil chapters, two andrew chapters. i just wanted to answer some questions i know a lot of you probably have. i thought maybe it was too quick to give them all up, since he was just introduced last chapter, but actually, that's not the case! this is a pretty slow-burn fic as far as i'm concerned. it just feels fast-paced since i'm writing so quickly. to me, at least.
> 
> chapter warnings/spoilers: discussion of past child abuse, discussion of past child sexual abuse, discussion of past rape, mention of miscarriage, discrimination based on gender presentation, unethical medical practices, physical violence, implied/referenced self-harm, drake, proust. they 100% are their own warnings.
> 
> andrew's timeline is a little screwy as you'll find out very quickly. all the same things happen, they just happen at different points in his life. i _think_ i've explained it enough to make sense, but if something seems overly strange, just let me know. i did write half of this very tired.

Someone is standing over him, staring down, and Andrew lashes out as he startles out of sleep, fist hitting soft flesh. A startled noise comes out of whoever he just hit but Andrew doesn’t care. He has to hit again, get whoever it is _away_ —

“Fuck’s sake, Andrew, it’s me,” Kevin whines from his pained huddle on the floor. He’s holding his stomach and groaning loudly.

It takes Andrew another second or two to process what he’s actually seeing. Kevin knows better than to wake Andrew up like that, to attempt to touch him in his sleep. With the nightmares plaguing his dreams, he can’t be surprised by his own actions. The fear was as close to the surface as he ever let it get after seeing Nathaniel. Another Alpha hovering over him in his sleep is enough to make him act out physically.

“Fuck’s sake, Day,” Andrew says back, mocking. “Don’t fucking touch me.”

“I wasn’t _going_ to. I was trying to figure out how to wake you up. Wymack’s called a team meeting.” Kevin gets up, still holding onto his stomach gingerly. He slants Andrew a suspicious look. “Bad dreams?”

Andrew scoffs and swings his legs over the edge of his bed. “Bad life. The others up?” He’s surprised Kevin was up before him. That never happens. But the Alpha did go to bed relatively sober. 

“Barely.” Kevin rolls his eyes. Ah, the patented shitty attitude back from the dead, huh? “Why does it take them so long to get ready in the morning?”

Andrew would shoot him a disbelieving look, but Kevin is too oblivious to understand the reason behind it. Instead he jerks his head at the door. “Go wait for them out there.” Kevin looks like he’s about to argue, but concedes easily enough when Andrew narrows his eyes.

He didn’t sleep well, for obvious reasons, and couldn’t bring himself to take his armguards off during the night. There’s another knife under his pillow that stays there and he’s feeling decidedly vulnerable enough to go for the one that rests at his back. Andrew doesn’t think Nathaniel is dangerous, not by himself, but what he brings with him certainly is, and Andrew won’t feel comfortable until he’s armed to the teeth.

Pulling on clothes is a quick ritual to complete. He doesn’t look at himself, although he’s sure it’s for reasons other than why someone like Nathaniel might not want to look at themselves. He hates being undressed, even by himself. Showers tend not to lend comfort, either. They’d had to get a lock installed on the bathroom door after Nicky barged in on him to use the toilet while Andrew showered. It wasn’t an offense he thought his cousin likely to repeat, but there was no way he could tolerate it otherwise.

His own neurosis set aside, Andrew goes into the living area of their dorm. It’s set up like a cheap apartment would be, he assumes. His room with Kevin was on one side of the dorm, their bathroom housing the shower while Nicky and Aaron’s room was across from the living room and their bathroom had the toilet. The living room area was tiny and only had enough room comfortably for beanbags on the floor in front of their shitty entertainment center setup. The kitchen was just as small, but it did mean they didn’t have to eat at the Caf or out for every single meal.

Kevin is making himself one of his disgusting kale smoothies. There’s a sullen look on his face that Andrew ignores. Aaron’s already in one of the beanbags in front of the television, texting the pretty, perfect Beta Andrew pretends he knows nothing about. Andrew might keep every single one of his promises, but the people around him tend not to. Doesn’t stop him from holding up his end, though.

“Let’s not keep our fearless leader waiting,” Andrew says dryly. “Where’s Nicky?”

“Never fear! Nicky’s here!” Nicky comes bustling out of the bathroom and brushes up against him. It sets Andrew’s teeth on edge, but it’s over quick enough for him to ignore. Nicky’s as chipper as ever, but Andrew can still smell the thin thread of anxiety he’s trying to hide. “I’m ready!”

Kevin is grumbling under his breath while dishing up his smoothie and Aaron heaves himself up. He makes sure he keeps enough distance between himself and Andrew so there’s no chance of them touching. Andrew can always trust him for that much, at least. He makes sure everyone is in front of him and secure before locking the door and heading after the others.

There’s a chance they could meet up with the others in the building, but Andrew is hoping they don’t. It’s too early to deal with them when they’re going to be forced in close proximity soon enough.

Nicky keeps up the idle chatter he’s known for when they reach Andrew’s car. Aaron grunts his answers back, more focused on his phone, and Kevin gives his input every now and then. Andrew remains silent while he concentrates on driving. 

It would be a nice morning if Andrew didn’t know what they were heading into. More tragic bullshit with a certain Omega. But it’s not too cold and the sun is shining fairly nicely in the sky. He can almost pretend they’re just driving back to Columbia to stay for the weekend. Unfortunately, he’s not much for refusing to look reality in the face, no matter how much he doesn’t like what’s going on. He learned that lesson the hard way.

He can smell the nervous tension getting thicker in the car as they get closer to the Court. It was always a marvel that Kevin couldn’t smell such strong emotions brewing so potently in such a small space. Nose-dead indeed.

Even Nicky is silent by the time Andrew parks. Matt’s beat up truck is already there, as is Allison’s obnoxious convertible, surprisingly. She was just as hard to get to come to things on time as Kevin. Wymack’s sensible hatchback is still sitting in his parking space, just as economical as the man himself.

“C’mon. Let’s get this shitshow over with,” Aaron murmurs from the backseat. Silently, Andrew agrees with the assessment.

They walk into the Court and Andrew is immediately slammed with the scent of panic and frustration. He speeds up the slightest bit, just to see what’s going on. Nathaniel is curled up on the same chair as the previous night, in clothes that are very obviously borrowed from Wymack, cringing away from a well-meaning Dan leaning over him. The rest of the Foxes are sprawled across various comfortable surfaces, watching them with interest. Aaron, Nicky and Kevin take their couch and look at Andrew to see what he’s going to do.

“You should back off, Wilds,” Andrew says, smiling with all his teeth. “I don’t think he likes you very much.” That’s an obvious understatement. The fear coming off of Nathaniel is palpable. Andrew can practically taste it. 

Dan waves a hand at him. “I’m just being friendly, what would you know. I’m trying to convince him to let me get this thing off his neck.”

Andrew steps closer, aware of Matt going tense in his seat on the couch. “Ah, I didn’t make myself clear, did I? Back off. Now.”

“What?” Dan turns around and eyes him narrowly. “Why should I listen to a thing you have to say?” Her hands are already on her hips and her legs are spread in a poster that screams _make me_. What a typical Alpha.

Renee, ever the pacifist, is the one to try to broker peace between them. “Dan, Nathaniel seems uncomfortable with you being so close. Maybe we can do this later? After the meeting?” Her voice is as soft as always, the silver cross shining at her throat. Her white hair is dipped in a pale pink today, different from the lilac the last time Andrew saw her. 

Dan throws her head back, nostrils flared, but allows Matt to pull her in with no effort. He presses a kiss to her neck that makes her deflate. If Andrew didn’t know any better, he’d think the Beta was actually an Omega with his innate ability to calm Dan down so well. She curls into his embrace, but her eyes keep going back to Nathaniel.

Speaking of, Andrew gets a good look at the Omega in the fresh morning light. He doesn’t look like he’s slept at all, dark shadows under his eyes. The bruises on his face and arms look just as nasty, though. The clothes are different, but the collar wrapped around his neck is still the same as it was last night. 

Amusingly enough, Renee mediating doesn’t make the smell of fear go away. Nathaniel’s eyes flick between Dan, Allison sitting on the couch with Seth, and the Jesus lover herself. Ah, so he’s cottoned onto that fact, has he?

Sweet, pious Renee tries her hardest not to outwardly project her status as an Alpha, but it’s hard to miss when you can smell her and when you can see past the smile on her face. It seems like Nathaniel can. How interesting.

Andrew frowned at his own train of thought. Nothing about the Omega was _interesting_.

Allison leans forward in her seat, ignoring the scowl Seth sends the room at large. Of the three Alpha women in the room, she’s the one who flaunts it the most. Nathaniel’s gaze snaps to her and the widening smirk on her face. She flicks her hair over her shoulder and shows her teeth in what’s less of a smile than a warning.

“When are we going to learn our newest cutie’s story?” she asks. Seth growls and she waves a hand at him. “I mean, we have the basics, of course. Omega, on the run, cute around all those ouchies and tacky displays of ownership. Are we going to have a shopping trip?”

Andrew wouldn’t trust Nathaniel in Allison’s claws, but that’s just him. It’s hard to trust an Alpha from the Reynolds family who throws everything away to slum it with their rag-tag crew and a Beta like Set.

Speaking of, Seth’s growl reaches an obnoxious level. “Why the fuck is he here?” he asks. A bastard dripping with overcompensation, if Andrew’d ever seen one. Seth acted like an Alpha because he couldn’t stand his Beta status. It was always a good time to rile him up.

“What? Don’t like a threat to your cushy position?” Andrew drawls.

Seth stands up, fists clenched. “What the fuck did you say, freak?” 

“Shut the fuck up and sit down,” Wymack barks out as he walks into the room, Abby by his side. Seth opens his mouth to argue but Wymack deftly ignores him. “As you all know, this is Nathaniel. He’ll be staying here for a while. Allison, I’ll need to talk to you about his advocacy case. Seth and Matt, we’ll probably have to beef up security for a while.” He slants a look at Nathaniel. “Those of you on my healthcare, it’s time for your yearly physicals. Betsy also has a schedule for you. Make sure you check it. Problems?” He ignores the chorus of groans and Seth’s _I’ve got a problem_ deftly. “Other than that, you’re free for the day. Please don’t cause problems, I already have a headache.”

He leaves with a wave and Abby slides into his place. “We have until the end of next week to get exams done, so don’t worry too much about it today. Just come to me when you’re ready. I can work around Betsy if need be.” She also looks at Nathaniel, but more openly than Wymack. Seems like someone hasn’t gotten very far with their newest guest. She leaves with an unhappy frown on her face and the rest of the Foxes pounce.

 

“I’ve got a fucking problem,” Seth repeats, because he’s stubborn and obnoxious. 

“A lot of them, from what I hear,” Nicky pipes up with a grin. 

“What was that, faggot?” 

Andrew goes tense and stands straighter, but he needn’t have bothered.

“Shut the fuck up with that language,” Dan snaps. “You know we don’t tolerate it here.” Wymack’s code of conduct again. What a good right-hand-man Dan is.

Seth scowls and crosses his arms over his chest, visibly sulking. 

Allison ignores both of them. She’s still looking at Nathaniel. Andrew’s never known her to have a preference for Omegas, not with her turbulent relationship with Seth in the forefront, but the Reynolds were old blood traditionalists. She would have been raised expecting to be mated to an Omega. Maybe she just hasn’t had the opportunity since she cut ties with her family. Maybe she wasn’t so progressive as she led on.

The Omega in question is obviously uncomfortable with the scrutinizing, but he can’t seem to help terrified glances at Renee between keeping the other two new Alphas in his line of sight. Interesting, to focus so much of his fear on Renee. People usually loved her. 

There he went with that word, again. 

“Nathaniel—” Kevin starts.

“Neil,” he says quickly. “I go by Neil.”

Kevin frowns. “What? Don’t be ridiculous, why would you—”

“We should respect Neil’s wishes,” Renee says. Today seems a day for interrupting Kevin, which amuses Andrew as much as it infuriates Kevin. “If he wants to go by Neil, that’s what we’ll call him.”

“Whatever, _Neil_ , can we talk?” Kevin asks. 

Neil gives Kevin a cool glance. “We’re talking right now.” 

Andrew has never met anyone who seems as determined as him to tell Kevin ‘no’. It’s refreshing to know there’s someone else out there after all.

Kevin’s frown deepens and he stands up. “In _private_.” He smells frustrated as hell, clearly used to being obeyed even though the rest of the Foxes don’t give one shit about where he came from. Allison is worth more than three Kevins put together, probably. His background doesn’t mean much, here, but he doesn’t seem to get that.

Neil’s eyes narrow. “No. I don’t want to go anywhere _private_ with you. I don’t like you, I certainly don’t trust you, and I have no reason to listen to anything you have to say. Not unless you’re going to make me.” His tone takes on a nasty implication at that, one that has the attention of the Foxes even quicker than anything else. Andrew can practically see them quivering over the scent of something scandalous.

“You heard him,” Dan says with a grin. “He doesn’t want to talk to you. Now, if you would just let me cut that thing off your neck, we could take you shopping for something other than David’s old rags—”

Unsurprisingly, Dan’s offer doesn’t go over well with Neil. He’s up and out of his seat quick as a lick, already up the stairs before anyone can get another word in edgewise. 

Andrew has a strong suspicion where he’ll end up, but he’s not bothered by that right now. He watches the rest of the Foxes take in Neil’s flight. Aaron and Nicky understand, even if Nicky looks a bit put out. Kevin’s face is flushed with his anger. Dan and Matt are sharing a concerned look, while Allison just looks considering. Seth is still sulking of course. Renee, when Andrew looks at her, is already staring back. She nods her head once and Andrew echoes her.

The Foxes split up, all moving on to whatever work they’re supposed to get done for the day. Andrew ambles over to the part of the Court that’s usually Renee’s domain. There’s a big cross on the wall with a banner that says _All Welcome Under the Lord_ in rainbow letters over it. She’s already putting pamphlets on chairs but she pauses when he takes a seat.

“Andrew,” she says easily. She’s wearing a long, pale pink skirt today that brushes her ankles when she moves. Loose enough to fight in, Andrew knows. 

“Renee,” he says back. He tips his chair back onto its back legs and watches her fiddle with her cross. While he watches, a darkness takes over her eyes and he lets the chair drop down with a loud crash. “There you are.”

“I’m always here,” Renee tells him gently. He can still see the thing lurking behind her visage, though. That’s what he actually wants to talk to. “Is he mine?” she asks simply.

Andrew studies Renee for a few silent moments. It would be easy enough to give his deal over to Renee. She was far kinder than him, knew how to deal with the traumatized ones. She was gentle where he was all jagged edges. He knew it was just a mask slipped over where she was made of knives, but not many people picked up on that.

Neil had, somehow. He was afraid of the Alpha, that was more than evident enough. Somehow, Andrew didn’t think Neil would find the comfort Renee offered very, well, comforting.

He shakes his head. “We made a deal, Neil and I.”

Renee tilts her head to the side. The thing behind her eyes is curious. “I didn’t think you’d want to, not with his past.” 

Ah. She surmised it then, or smelled it. Keen nose on this one. He doubted Neil had had the time to wash away the stink of his owners, but Renee wasn’t as nose-dead as the rest. Wasn’t allowed to be, was she.

Andrew waves that away. “Neither here nor there. We made a deal.” Renee understands what that means, even if almost no one else did. 

Finally, Renee smiles, and the dark thing inside her hides away again. “Let me know if you need any help. I’m always here, of course.” Andrew grunts his ascent. “Would you care to spar, later?”

That could be useful. He nods and gets up, ready to go find stray troublemakers of his.

Kevin waylays him as soon as he’s done with Renee, of course. 

“I want to talk to Nathaniel,” he says immediately.

Andrew doesn’t bother rolling his eyes. “I hear he goes by something else these days.”

Kevin makes an impatient noise and grabs Andrew’s arm. A single, sharp look has him dropping his hand quickly. “Regardless. I need to talk to him.”

“Need or want? The two are very different things.”

The Alpha lets out another incoherent noise of frustration. It’s so satisfying making him react like that. “What does it matter? Will you take me to him?”

Andrew levels him a blank look. “No.”

He brushes Kevin off easily enough to go fume on his own. He’s probably going to go rant to someone until he realizes no one cares and then he’ll give up, pout and call his girlfriend. Andrew heads up the stairs and to the roof access door. It’s not propped open, but Andrew can still smell the slight scent of fear lingering around it.

Neil is right where Andrew suspected he’d be, leaning too far over the edge of the roof. Fear immediately grips Andrew tight in the stomach, but it settles quickly enough when Neil makes no move to take a header. He takes a cigarette out to smooth over the rough edge of the emotion, offers Neil one on a whim.

Surprisingly, the Omega takes one. They light up in silence and Andrew takes a drag, watching Neil. Neil takes an initial drag and then just holds the cigarette close to his face, inhaling deeply every now and then. He ashes once the it gets too long but other than that doesn’t actually smoke. Andrew huffs and sits down next to him.

“Too much excitement for your delicate sensibilities?”

“Too many Alphas,” Neil corrects. He glances over at Andrew. “Did they send you to wrangle me?”

Andrew takes a lazy drag and watches the clouds lazily crawling across the sky. “No one sends me anywhere.”

Neil seems to accept that. They sit in silence until both their cigarettes are burned up. Neil shakes his head when Andrew offers another one but doesn’t seem to mind Andrew lighting up again. 

There’s no smell of fear up here. Whatever, _whoever_ Neil was scared of, he left it at the door. Up here he doesn’t smell like much of anything. He’s just sitting too close to the edge, arms wrapped around his knees. Even the scent of foreign Alphas is starting to subside, wind picking up the stink and carrying it away. He could still do with a good scrubbing, but at least Andrew doesn’t want to wrinkle his nose at him anymore. 

“You’re different,” Neil says after a while, breaking their companionable quiet. He glances at Andrew again out of the corner of his eyes. “Kevin forgets he’s an Alpha most of the time until it’s convenient to him. But you…you’re not like any Alpha I’ve ever encountered before.” With his experience, he’s probably encountered more than a fair few.

Andrew blows out a cloud of smoke. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Neil wrinkles his nose, turns his head to look at him fully finally. “If I couldn’t smell you, I would never pick you out as one. I would think, because of your brother…”

He trails off like he’s expecting Andrew to answer. Andrew just looks at him blankly, brings his cigarette to his mouth. Neil huffs. 

“You could tell me about yourself,” he says finally.

“Why should I? What will you give me?”

Neil frowns. “Haven’t I already given you my terrible backstory?” he asks. “By no choice of my own, even.”

Andrew waves his cigarette in the air. “I don’t owe you for that. Had nothing to do with me.” It did, really. He demanded answers.

“I could just go ask your brother.”

“Good luck with that. By all means.”

The Omega isn’t visibly pouting, but Andrew can smell his slight frustration at being rebuffed. Maybe he isn’t used to it. Andrew knows all about what Omegas are used to getting because of what they are.

Then again, Neil hasn’t led the gentlest of lives, has he? Under the control of Riko and another Alpha before that. One who didn’t seem to care what he was signing his child away for.

“I’ll trade you,” he says after a long stretch of silence.

Neil looks at him, immediately suspicious. He draws into himself even more and Andrew rolls his eyes. “What?”

“Don’t be an idiot. I don’t need that. We’ll make it a game. Truth for a truth. Sound fair enough?”

Neil seems to muse over it for a while, staring out over the parking lot. “Who goes first?” he finally asks.

“Me, of course.” Andrew smirks at the face Neil makes. He flicks his spent cigarette away and lays all the way back on the roof, soaking in the sun. He steeples his fingers over his stomach and waits for Neil to relax again. When he finally stops sitting so tensely, Andrew asks his question. “Where are your parents?”

Of course, Neil goes all over tense again. There’s a pungent stink of fear and anxiety coming off of him, but there’s also a tinge of regret and sorrow. “Dead,” he says. His voice sounds hollow again, like it did last night. 

“Ask your question,” Andrew says.

He goes straight for Andrew’s throat. “How are you not a Beta?”

Andrew weighs whether or not he’ll answer. He _did_ make the rule for the game. “I don’t know,” he says. 

Neil frowns. “That’s not an answer.”

“It’s the truth, though.” Andrew fidgets with his pack and wonders if he should light up another just for something to do. “Not all twins are the same, you know.” 

“Most are. Identical ones are.”

Andrew raises a brow. “Okay Mr. Biologist. Then you tell me.”

“That’s not how this works.” Neil hesitates. “If you don’t want to answer—”

“Aaron’s mother was on drugs when she got pregnant with us. I assume some combination of that and random, mutated biology.” Andrew flicks his fingers like he’s getting rid of something gross and clinging.

Neil appears satisfied with that answer, even though he probably could have guessed half of it himself. It rankles at Andrew, doesn’t feel like a fair exchange. He pushes on regardless. 

“How did your parents die?”

The return of Neil’s terrible smile. This time, however, he covers it with his fingers like he’s trying to pry it off. “My father…he worked for the Moriyamas. I didn’t know that, not at the time. He owed them a debt and they killed him when he couldn’t pay up. My mom died while we were on the run. Moriyama men.”

Andrew watches Neil carefully as he answers. There’s no smell of deceit around him. Just bitter resignation, like he knew what Andrew was going to ask him. He can accept that answer, for now. There’s more to it than that, but Andrew will leave it.

“Are you sure you’re an Alpha?”

“Ouch.” Andrew huffs. “You sure you want to waste your question on that?”

Neil nods, eyes wide. 

Andrew turns inwards, to the pool of molten fury that’s at the very core of him. The rage that’s usually smothered by the numbness of indifference. He’s not sure if his medicine scrambled his brains for good, or if it’s just going to take longer to feel normal things again. He mostly doesn’t care. Before the numbness, he was always angry. Does he want to go back to that?

He lets his fury come to the surface; thinks about the nightmares that plagued him the whole night through, of Riko’s smug fucking face in the club when he was talking to Kevin. It’s enough to fill him up with the sticky feeling.

Since he’s watching, he sees the moment Neil picks up on it. His eyes go even wider and he scrambles back, nostrils flaring. Andrew can smell it around them, filling the air. He suspects no one but Renee would be able to pick up on it in the building, and she knows better than to go putting her nose in his business.

There’s something else in his scent other than anger, of course. His own natural pheromones that usually lie dormant unless he lets go of his control. They’re enough to have Neil cowering, hands over his head like he expects an incoming blow. He probably does.

Andrew folds the emotion away deep down into the deepest parts of himself. Wipes away his thoughts about Riko and his dreams. There’s no point thinking about them, not right now. They won’t do him any good. Being _angry_ doesn’t do him any good. He breathes deeply and counts; the way Betsy always tells him to.

Slowly, his own scent disappears, goes down to whatever level means he can’t smell himself, but Neil can. At least on the surface. He takes out another cigarette to distract himself and still his shaking fingers.

“Satisfied with the answer?” he asks around it. It takes a few times to get the lighter to work properly, but he’s calmed down by the time he takes his first inhale.

Neil uncovers his head and looks at Andrew, mouth flat in a grim line. “How can you put it away like that?”

Andrew exhales. “You already had your turn.”

“I’ll owe you one.”

Something like a smile creeps over his face. “Practice.”

-

Andrew leaves Neil on the roof and makes his way back to the Court proper. Now that business hours have come and gone, there are other people in the building. Mostly Betas with a few Alphas mixed in. They don’t see many Omegas, no one really does anymore. Renee’s got her group of Jesus freaks in her corner, the deaf leading the blind. Allison is on her phone and gesturing angrily. Dan is leaning in Wymack’s doorway, talking to him about something. Matt has a group of little kids circled around him and he’s reading from a picture book. 

He doesn’t see Seth or his cousin or the nurse. His brother is leaning against the wall, phone perpetually in hand.

“Aren’t you supposed to be doing something,” Andrew says as he walks by.

“Fuck you,” Aaron replies without looking up. 

Their relationship is as cheerful as ever. 

Andrew goes to Betsy’s office even though it’s not his day for it. Her door’s open and there’s no harm saying hello. He sticks his head inside. 

“Andrew!” Betsy says as soon as she spots him. There’s no surprise flavoring her scent, so she must have suspected he’d come to see her today. 

“Bee.” He takes in her office, the exact same as it always is. It’s a near-identical replica to her office on campus. The only difference are the tacky figurines decorating them. Even Betsy didn’t need them to be the exact same. “Busy, Bee?”

“Not currently.” She smiles at his joke the way he knew she would. “Would you like to come in?” 

She’s already reaching for the cocoa drawer in her desk before Andrew decides to accept her invitation. He closes the door after himself and sits down in his usual spot, able to take in her and the door at the same time.

Betsy is, unsurprisingly a Beta. Mild-mannered, slightly overweight, more handsome than pretty. Andrew idly wonders if Wymack collected Betas for his special project; if he thought Betas would put the most people at ease. Andrew certainly wouldn’t have accepted Betsy if she was anything but.

After an almost never-ending mix of overbearing Alphas and Betas in charge of his mental health recover, Andrew was content with Betsy.

“Is this a social visit or an official one?” Betsy asks as she hands him his cocoa. She settles into her chair with a little bit of a wiggle. “I’m glad for either.” 

Andrew has no doubt that Betsy would fill the room with idle chatter if he said it was a social visit. The same way she would let him sit in silence with her fi that’s what he requested. Instead, he shrugs.

“There’s a new face in the Foxhole Court,” she says. She takes a sip of her cocoa and looks over the rim of her mug at him. “I hear you were the one who rescued him.”

“That’s too dramatic,” Andrew tells her. “Kevin was the one who brought him with us.”

Betsy smiles and brings her cup down to her lap. “You also kept Kevin safe from Riko.”

Andrew stares at her. “That’s our deal.” 

She hums and nods. “Of course. You keep him safe from Riko and Evermore. You’d never shirk your duty.”

He snorts at her implication. “I would have given the kid your card and left it at that if Riko hadn’t been there.”

Betsy doesn’t say anything to contradict him. She takes another sip of her drink and lets the silence between them stretch comfortably. He never knows what she’s thinking, and the only thing she ever smells like is mild curiosity. Andrew wonders if shrinks go through special classes to teach them to keep their smells to themselves, or if Betsy in particular just has a natural talent. He’s certainly met other psychiatrists who have zero control.

“He asked about my status,” Andrew says after he drains his mug.

“Ah.” Betsy sets her cup down on the table between them. There’s a voice recorder there that’s already on and she picks up the pad of paper and next to it. She taps the pen on the pad three times before writing something down. “Omegas have a keen sense of smell,” she says vaguely.

“I know,” he tells her. “There was one in one of my group homes. She always complained about the other kids stinking everything up.”

One of Betsy’s eyebrows go up over the rim of her glasses. “An Omega in a group home? That’s certainly unusual, isn’t it?” 

Andrew shrugs. “Group home for Betas, not like anyone would do anything to her.”

The pen taps against her pad again. “This was when you were still on your medication?”

“After juvie. I was sent to a group home.” 

“Before the Spears?”

He’s quiet for a long time. “Yes.”

Betsy nods and writes something else down. “Were you friends with her? This Omega?”

“No,” he says immediately, waving her question off. “I was almost constantly out of my mind from the meds. Couldn’t be friends with anyone while I was like that.” He doesn’t add that he didn’t want or need friends. Friends were a liability in the system. Just another way to hurt you, in the end.

Andrew hesitates for a second before he continues. “Our newest recruit, he told us he’s had miscarriages.”

Betsy’s eyes soften. “That’s terrible,” she says.

He shrugs, impatient. “The Omega in my group home, she had one. I think she got her hands on some pharmaceutical grade shit or whatever. She didn’t tell me who got her pregnant. I was never sure if she…” He pauses and Betsy writes, scritch scratch across the paper. “She asked me to stand guard while it happened. Didn’t want anyone to know what was going on. Thought she’d get in trouble if they knew.”

Andrew remembers the smell of blood, the sound of her muffled sobs and the way she twisted around in the sheets. He’d had to stuff his entire fist in his mouth so he wouldn’t break out into laughter. She’d been so quiet, the next day, withdrawn. He never could tell if she regretted it or not. Didn’t have the time to ask before he was gone.

“She probably would have.” Betsy doesn’t sound one way or another about it. Andrew has no clue how she feels about the treatment of Omegas, inside the system or out. It’s never come up between them. But not having an opinion is her job, he supposes.

“Do you think she knew?” Betsy asks when Andrew stays silent. “That you were an Alpha? She trusted no one else to guard her while going through such a traumatic experience. Only you.”

Andrew thinks about it as he studies the figurines lining Betsy’s shelves. He knows them all by heart, of course, but there’s something soothing about looking at their orderly lines. “Don’t know how she could’ve. I was doped up on those meds. I’m sure they messed up my scent to anyone not nose-dead enough to notice.”

Betsy hums. “Perhaps it was instinctual. Something about you made her seek you out.”

Andrew shifts, uncomfortable. “I don’t know.”

She lets that line of questioning drop.

He tries not to overanalyze it, that Omega asking him to keep lookout for her. He didn’t know her very well, rarely spoke to her. Rarely spoke to _anyone_ in that group home at all. His false cheer made it hard to keep his thoughts to himself, so he spent most of his time away from anyone else. Maybe she’d asked him because she knew he kept to himself, wouldn’t rat her out. Maybe it was something else. Didn’t matter much, not in the end anyway.

“Did you keep in touch with her after you left?” Betsy asks.

“No. I didn’t think about her. Haven’t thought about her since last night.”

“Because of Neil?”

He nods. 

“Did you think about being there for Neil while he miscarried?”

Andrew hesitates. “No,” he says slowly. “I was just remembering what it smelled like. Smell is the closest sense tied to memory.”

Betsy taps her pen. “Yes. Scents can trigger potent memories, even in those of us without perfect recall.”

They’re quiet again. Betsy drinks the rest of her cocoa even though he’s sure it’s gone cold by now. She can’t abide leaving anything in her mug, he knows, but she much prefers it hot. He concentrates on her, on the way her hands wrap around the mug, on the decoration of a yawning cat.

“Did you tell Neil why you present differently than some other Alphas?” Betsy would never say Andrew was abnormal, or that he didn’t present like _all_ other Alphas. She didn’t believe in absolutes like that.

He shakes his head. “He asked why I wasn’t a Beta, and then if I was sure I was an Alpha.” He levels her with a flat look.

Her eyebrow raises again. “Tough questions. Did they upset you?”

“No. They weren’t upsetting. I’m used to people questioning my status.” He quirks what has to be an awful looking grin at her. “You know that.”

“Just because you are used to something doesn’t mean it can’t upset you,” she says evenly. Betsy puts her empty mug back onto the table, turning the handle just so. “You’re allowed to be upset over someone questioning your presentation.” 

Andrew fiddles with the fringe on the armrest of the couch. “What’s the point? Will getting upset change anything?”

“Andrew, feeling things doesn’t have to be about satisfying a point. Feelings don’t have to be useful. You can just feel things because you feel them.” This is not the first time Betsy has said that. It never makes much sense, though. Or maybe it does. Andrew just doesn’t care. 

“I’m sure you’ll have a good time with him,” he says, changing the topic before she pushes. 

Betsy pushes her glasses up her nose. “I don’t know if Neil wants to talk to me, and even if he does—”

“I know, I know, you won’t discuss your other patients with me. Boring.”

She smiles warmly at him, not bothered in the least by his attitude. “Was there anything else you needed to discuss with me?” She doesn’t tell him she has another patient, or that she’s busy with paperwork or something. Betsy would never do that. She just waits for him to make up his mind.

Andrew thinks it over. There are other things he could bring up, things Betsy and he have talked about before, but that he maybe wouldn’t mind talking about now. But he does have another appointment during the week. They can always talk about them then.

“No,” he says, standing up. He watches as she taps her pen three more times, then puts it and the pad back down on the table. He knows she’ll clean everything up to her liking after he leaves.

“Until next week, then.” She stands as well and goes over to the door to open it. There’s someone sitting outside, reeking of misery. A female Beta. Andrew doesn’t know her and he doesn’t care to. He nods to Betsy and walks away from her office.

Andrew’s itching for another cigarette, but he doesn’t want to go to the roof and possibly run into Neil again. He doesn’t know if the Omega is up there, but he doesn’t want to be close to him when he knows he smells like a murky mess of emotions the way he always does after seeing Betsy. It’s a new thing, the mix of emotions that come after his sessions. He isn’t sure if they’re any better than the numbness or the anger. He doesn’t particularly care for them either way.

“We’re leaving,” he says to Kevin as he passes him. 

The Alpha is reading some book on one historical battle or another. He looks startled Andrew is talking to him. “What? But—”

“Don’t make me repeat myself.” Andrew keeps walking, knowing Kevin is scrambling to follow. He glances up briefly and sees Neil standing at the balcony of the second floor, looking down at him. He walks quicker. Nicky and Aaron can get their own rides back to the dorm that they all inexplicably share, Andrew doesn’t care. He would drive them to Columbia if it didn’t take so long and he didn’t need to be behind a locked door quite so much.

Kevin doesn’t try to talk to him in the car. Smart of him. He’s texting someone. Could be his girlfriend, could be Nicky. Either way, Andrew has no doubt he’s complaining. He still has his history book with him, so it’ll give him something to do.

“Stay out of our room,” Andrew says when they get back to the dorm. He heads straight for it, closing and locking the door before Kevin can get a complaint in at all. Andrew hears him grumbling but he walks into the living room and the TV turns on. Good.

Andrew lets out a breath he’d been holding since he stepped out of Betsy’s office and flops down onto his bed. He’s been seeing her since Wymack added him to his collection, but it’s only been recently that Andrew comes out of their appointments feeling disjointed. The effects of the medication no longer being in control of him, Betsy says. It’ll be a slow transition back to normal emotions. He doesn’t want them but even if he wasn’t required to see her, he still thinks he would talk to Betsy every week.

Neil has more questions, Andrew knows. Questions regarding his status and presentation. Andrew knows they’re coming. Can’t do much about it unless he never takes his turn. He’s too curious for that, though, wants to figure Neil out. He’s a puzzle. Not much of one, but enough to pique Andrew’s curiosity. His interest, if he’s honest with himself.

It’s not because he’s an Omega. That can’t be the reason. Andrew’s never been overly interested in them like other Alphas, doesn’t think they’re the most compatible for each other like purists do. Andrew doesn’t believe in love, but if he did, he wouldn’t let it be dictated by distinction.

He folds his hands over his stomach and stares up at the ceiling, wondering. What was it like to be tested at ten and _know_ for sure what you were? He never was. Slipped through the bureaucratic red tape while moving between homes and families and was designated Beta for convenience sake. He was quiet and not aggressive, of course he was a Beta. 

Andrew was a quiet child because circumstance dictated it. He couldn’t understand his situation if he was loud and brash like the other Alphas. He learned very quickly to stay quiet and to observe. He remembered everything, so it wasn’t hard to find patterns in the homes he was placed in. 

The system tended to give undesignated kids to couples with other fosters and adopted children. It was to keep Omegas safe, or something like that. If a kid wasn’t adopted as a baby, they were expected to grow up with others until they were tested. After that, they could go to families who only wanted one kid. That was when Andrew learned to hate and distrust Alphas.

He’d never had a problem with them before. Sure, they were more obnoxious and thought they deserved everything they wanted simply because they were Alphas, but he didn’t see any _harm_ in them. Not until his first solo placement. His foster father taught him that _everything they wanted_ included things Andrew wasn’t ready to give up.

His bad attitude and anger problems developed after he was taken away from that foster family. He was labeled a problem child; strange for a small, quiet Beta kid. He used his fists more than his mouth, got in fights and brawls with kids older and bigger in the group homes.

It all came to a head when he beat an Alpha half to death in one of his homes. He’d seen the Alpha going into the rooms of the younger kids at night. It unleashed a rage from deep inside him he’d never felt, before. He was arrested, of course, and sent off to juvie. If he was going to go away for it, he should’ve just killed the bastard and had it done with. Andrew wasn’t sure if anyone believed him when he told them why he’d done it—adults tended not to believe him, even though he only told the truth. He didn’t see the point in lies.

Part of his sentencing involved going on medication for his unusual anger issues. It was the only thing that kept him in juvie and out of adult jail. If he refused the meds, he would be treated as an adult. Andrew wasn’t sure what adult prison was like, but he didn’t want to experience it. His state-appointed lawyer accepted the deal on his behalf and Andrew started his medication.

It was something formulated specifically for Betas with aggressive tendencies, he learned. Something that would make him act gentler and more normal. Instead, Andrew felt like he was going out of his mind. He was manic on his pills. Couldn’t stop laughing and smiling even though he didn’t feel any sort of joy. It made couples want to approach him for possible fostering and adoption, but they returned him quickly enough once they realized the happiness was manufactured. 

He tried to stop taking them, but every time he did, he felt so sick he couldn’t function. All he could think about were his pills, when he would get his next one, when he would stop feeling the pains of withdrawal. He was hooked, line and sinker. There was no way he could get rid of them on his own, especially when he had to submit to pee tests whenever an adult got it into their heads he was trying to stay off them.

Andrew went through two years of medicated hell, going between families and homes, until the Spears found him. Cass was a Beta, sweet as could be. She was all smiles and cheer. Her home always smelled like baked goods and something calming that was all her own. Richard was also a Beta and while Andrew didn’t relax around him, knew Betas could do evil just as easily as Alphas, it was hard to see him as a threat after getting to know him. He was boring, liked his job as a history teacher, watched baseball games with actual enjoyment. 

Life with them was…not terrible. Cass would hold the hair away from his forehead when he got sick off his medication, then make him something easy for his stomach to handle. She asked him to help her bake, something no one had ever asked of him. She included him in decisions, asked him about what he wanted. He could actually imagine himself graduating high school and then going to college, the Spears standing happily in the stands and cheering for him. That might not be so bad at all. She was a Godsend.

Their Alpha son was from the other place. 

He showed way too much interest in Andrew from the first night he came home. Going to go off to join the Marines, Cass said, proud and worried in turn. Drake’s eyes followed Andrew everywhere he went and Andrew knew nothing good could come of it.

It was no surprise, then, when Drake came into his room that night after everyone else was asleep. He leaned over Andrew in bed and smiled. “Hey, AJ. Just thought we could have a little chat.”

Of course. A Chat. It was late enough that Andrew’s last dose had worn off and he wasn’t smiling anymore. He felt nauseous, but he knew it was for a reason other than coming down off his meds. 

Drake reached out to touch his hair, grinning. “Look at you. You’re small enough to be an Omega, you know that? Soft like one, too.”

He liked to compare Andrew to an Omega, he would find out later. He thought it was admirable that Andrew was soft and quiet and pliant, all good Omega traits the Alpha told him. Maybe they’d been wrong with his testing? Maybe he was actually an Omega, and if that was the case, Drake would mate him and breed him properly. Had Andrew experienced anything like a heat before? Of course, his medication might mess with something like that. Drake would make sure he was off the happy pills once he took Andrew for his own.

Andrew put up with it all. Said and did nothing if it meant he could have Cass and her sweet smiles and sweeter pancakes in the morning. He learned to temper the agony of his nights with the dull pain of a razorblade against his arms. It kept him present. He could survive this. He would.

The letter from South Carolina was a surprise. A twin, and wasn’t that funny. Dear old mom had kept one and sent the other to live in hell. And now they wanted to meet him? Take him back? What a riot.

“Just imagine, AJ,” Drake said, reading the letter again. There was a picture of Andrew’s twin and mom, some extended family. Drake ran his finger over the image of the other boy. “A matched set. Isn’t that great? What is he, did they say?” He grinned. “Guess it doesn’t matter when I get you both in my bed. Why don’t you invite him to stay with us for the summer?”

Andrew thought long and hard about things. He made sure to skip his meds so he _could_ think between the bouts of puking. There was no way he could let this twin he’d never met fall into Drake’s hands. He’d probably grown up soft and sweet, like one of Cass’ smiles. Drake would destroy him.

There were very few options he could consider. If he did something to send him back to juvie, it would be real prison this time. He didn’t think there was anything he could say to make Cass send him back to the state. That really left only one route.

He hugged Cass tight, trying to pretend he couldn’t hear her tears. Richard clapped him on the back and Drake stood in the background trying not to look furious. They sent him off to South Carolina with their blessing, understanding his need to reconnect with his birth family.

Andrew’s first flight was spent trying not to vomit everywhere or kill the stewardess or people near him. His medication worked to suppress that rage inside him, but it didn’t work when he was terrified out of his mind. Who knew his fear of heights got _worse_ with each foot added.

His family was everything he’d expected and less. A disappointment from the word go. Tilda was obviously tweaked on something and Aaron didn’t look any soberer. A matched set, ha. Tilda’s brother was with her at the airport to pick him up. So, he was the one who forced Tilda to take him back. That much was obvious. The woman, a Beta like Andrew and his twin, had no clue what to do with him, seemed bewildered every time she looked at Aaron and saw Andrew by his side.

Her brother, an overbearing Alpha, had a Beta son who Andrew didn’t meet for a long time, sent away to some Christian camp as he was. The wife was an Omega ‘rescued’ from Mexico, quiet and meek, everything a good Omega was supposed to be for their Alpha mate. Their son was as tall as his dad, but he took after her in coloring and temperament. Nicky was scared of his own shadow for the most part, and miserable by half, but he was unwaveringly kind to Andrew. Tried to bring him into the family until he went off to Germany.

Tilda turned out to be worse than a drunk and a druggie. She hit Aaron, beat him when she was drunk and furious. Andrew took it in and tried to fight his smile. There was nothing funny about the situation, but Aaron hadn’t asked anything of him. Not yet.

His twin was pathetic, really. Always high on whatever Tilda pushed on him. Drunk when he could filch her booze. Aaron never fought back, never told his mom to stop. He just covered his bruises up and went about like everything was normal.

Andrew got tired of it after their shared 17th birthday ended in hysterics and a black eye on Aaron’s part.

“I’ll keep you safe,” Andrew said as he watched Aaron tend to his wounds in the bathroom. There was a manic grin spread over his face and he watched Aaron take that in. They all knew about his meds, knew what they made him do. 

“Safe from what,” Aaron said dully.

“Your mother. Anything. If you stay with me, I’ll keep you safe.”

Aaron’s eyes found his in the mirror. “She’s your mother, too, you know.”

Andrew laughed.

It took a few days, but Aaron came to him in the end. “I stay with you?” he asked. “That’s it?”

“You don’t interact with anyone I don’t approve and you stick with me until we’re done with high school, then our deal is over. Understood?”

He didn’t know if Aaron would understand what it meant to make a deal with Andrew. He doubted it. But Andrew was stone sober for the first time in a long time when he shook his twin’s hand. He was sober when he told Tilda not to lay a hand on Aaron again. He was sober when they got into the car together and she proved she couldn’t listen.

Aaron couldn’t look at him for weeks after the funeral. Clearly, he hadn’t understood what Andrew meant by keeping him safe. That wasn’t his problem. What _was_ his problem was where they would live. They weren’t adults, not legally, so the only choice was back to the system or with Luther. Rock and a hard place. 

Nicky surprised them all by coming back from Germany and putting himself in the running. He actually stood up to Luther, made insinuations that had the Alpha red faced and fuming. Andrew and Aaron got to move in to a house in Columbia with their cousin paid for in part by Tilda’s death. The rest went into Andrew’s GT. 

They all knew Nicky was only going to stay until the twins graduated, then he’d go back to Germany and his overenthusiastic Alpha mate. That was, until the fight at Eden’s that put four Alphas in the hospital in near-critical condition and Andrew on his way to jail. He was already 18, had already had too many chances. His ticket was up. 

Then the hospital staff treating his wounds actually ran a test on him and found out he was an Alpha, _not_ the Beta he’d been labeled all his life. Wymack showed up somehow and demanded Andrew be taken off his meds, be given a fair trial that took into account the mind-altering effects of the drugs he never should’ve been on in the first place. He somehow found out Andrew had never been given his testing at 10, had never been properly assigned his designation, just shuffled off as someone else’s problem. Wymack’s passionate argument about the ills of the system harming the children that fell through the cracks was enough to get Andrew out of jail and into rehab. 

That had been a uniquely horrible experience. Between the terrible effects of withdrawal and Proust’s ‘unique’ methods of therapy, Andrew didn’t think he would survive. It was less a relief and more a miracle when his stint was over and he was allowed to leave a free man. Well, free-ish. He still had Wymack to contend with, the deal he’d made the Beta that got him and his family free rides to college and a place in the world.

Between that and the drama with Kevin, Andrew had been off his meds for over a year. He would be 20 in the fall and part of the way through a criminal justice degree. Miracles never ceased, did they?

He’s drawn out of his extensive memory by Kevin banging at the door. “You’re not the only one who lives here, you know!” the Alpha is shouting in time with his fist hitting wood. “Will you open up? I need something!”

Andrew sighs and considers pretending he can’t hear Kevin. That always riles him up further. Kevin makes an inarticulate sound of rage and Andrew gets up. Maybe giving the Alpha an anger-induced aneurism isn’t the best choice.

Kevin shoves his way into the bedroom and goes over to his shelf of books. Of _course_ that was important enough to bother Andrew with. He doesn’t ask Andrew what he was doing, why he was locked away for however long Andrew has been skipping down memory lane. He either doesn’t care or knows better. Andrew would eat his armguards, knives and all, before he believed Kevin was capable of making good decisions. 

“You know, Wymack wanted us to stick around, try to integrate Nathaniel into the group. And I wanted to talk to him, which you so rudely refused.” Kevin is going through his books, obviously looking for something specific. “When are we going to go back?” he demands.

Andrew looks at the clock Kevin has over his desk. It’s been a few hours. He’s mildly surprised Kevin was able to be patient this long.

“Who says we’re going back today?” he asks. There’s no reason not to go back, now that Andrew has had time to calm down. He just likes needling the Alpha. 

Kevin scowls. “You’re such an asshole.”

Andrew leaves the room and heads to the front door; he’s confident Kevin will scramble after him to keep up. “Takes one to know one,” he says easily over his shoulder.

Unsurprisingly, the Alpha follows him, loudly complaining about Andrew’s attitude. Andrew tunes him out as they make their way back to his car. Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more.


	5. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More games of truth. More games of trust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first off, happy birthday to me! here's a present for you all. truth be told, i didn't think i would finish this today, but my neighbors were having a very loud birthday party behind me and the other neighbors were having a very loud karaoke party and the two clashing parties kept me awake and drove me to finish. anyways.
> 
> some things i wanted to clear up: i very, very deliberately coded andrew to seem like an omega within the parameters of the universe rules i made up. it was very much a choice on my part. i wrote things the way i did to confuse you and make you think, is he really...? because it was an interesting way to play with the dynamics of ABO. i mean, i knew all of you would be like, omega neil means alpha andrew automatically, right? but leaving you guessing was fun. also, i've got some things planned that i literally thought up tonight, so i'm pretty excited for them. probably for next chapter. i've decided i want to BASICALLY stick to the outline of the books, but i don't want to rehash the same events in the exact same way, because that's boring and you've all read it a million different times. i also have not used any dialogue from the books unless it's just so ingrained in me from the literal millions of words in fics/rereads i've done.
> 
> chapter warnings/spoilers: not too much this time! implied/referenced self-harm, implied/referenced suicide attempt, discussion about miscarriages and self-abortions, implied/referenced unethical medical practices, violence, implied/referenced rape/gang-rape. upon reading all of those things, okay, yes, that's a lot. but it's not as graphic as the previous chapters? just covering my bases...
> 
> i think there were other things i wanted to say here, but i genuinely can't remember. i'm very tired. if i remember them, i guess i'll just write them next chapter. in the next few chapters, i really do intend to flesh out the other foxes more. i genuinely do like them and want to write about them. it's just hard to get away from neil and andrew's train-wreck. enjoy!

Neil couldn't sleep. Abby and Wymack had gently cornered him into a room on the second floor of the building, saying something about getting rest and changing into the clothes Wymack happened to have in his office. He hadn’t wanted to go, but they didn’t seem like they would take no for an answer. At least the door wasn’t locked when he tried it later.

Still, he couldn’t sleep. Too many things had happened that night. Riko and the club and Kevin and Andrew. It was way too much to just go to sleep after. Plus, he doesn’t know this place. There’s no way he can fall asleep in such strange surroundings.

Were they strange? Neil really had no concept of strangeness, not anymore. Maybe a place like this was normal and he was the one that was strange. That would make more sense.

He changes into Wymack’s clothes because it’s better than wearing the scraps of fabric Riko put him in before the left for the club. Those he left in a heap outside his room. They stunk like Raven and he didn’t want that smelling up this room. Not if he was supposed to sleep in it.

Neil sits on the bed and looks around. The walls were a soft blue color and the sheets matched. A cheap but sturdy dresser and side table were the only furniture besides the bed, which was neither too hard nor too soft. No pictures or paintings to make the space feel personal. Abby had said something about a bathroom down the hall, but Neil didn’t feel like venturing outside, not just yet. 

Kevin had looked…good, Neil admits to himself. He chews on his thumb nail as he thinks of the Alpha, ignoring the sharp taste of blood. He hadn’t thought he’d ever have to see Kevin again, not with how furious Riko always was when the Alpha came up.

Sure, Riko made it clear he wanted Kevin back at his side, but Neil hadn’t really thought it would happen. Kevin got out. Why would he ever come back? But seeing him in the club, cowering under Riko’s touch, he’d almost thought it really _would_ happen.

Pathetic. He’d looked pathetic, shivering and hunched over like that. Like just one more word and Riko would have pulled him right along to the cars waiting outside for them. 

Neil moves on to another nail when the pain gets too sharp from his thumb.

How dare Kevin look like that? Sure, he was a defensive mess, back when he still lived with them. Before he’d escaped. But he’d gotten _away_. He’d done what Neil couldn’t. He—along with Thea and Jean, turns out—had escaped from under Riko’s thumb. So why quiver like a mewling whelp at just the sight of him? Kevin was free, he didn’t have to worry about Riko anymore.

He didn’t _belong_ to Riko, not like Neil did. Like he always had. Kevin was his brother, his second, but he was a free man, too. He had a life outside Riko’s whims and plans.

Kevin also had another Alpha to rule his life, or something like it.

Neil pauses his chewing to think about the other Alpha. Andrew. 

He didn’t smell…right. His Alpha scent was there, just at the edge. Neil hadn’t pegged him while they were in the bathroom together. He’d been too focused on his own pain, on the thought of the Raven waiting outside for him, of what had just—

Andrew hadn’t blipped his radar, and that was rare. He was attuned to Alphas, always cautious for their next move. Even Betas made more of an impression than Andrew had, before he beat Phillips up and dragged Neil away.

It wasn’t until Neil was in the car with him that he got a good smell. Kevin was in the back, stinking things up with his fear. The Betas were confused and full of adrenaline. Andrew had been a calm, almost soothing presence behind the wheel. His smell was steady and focused.

Not one Neil had ever smelled off an Alpha, before. It made him all the scarier.

Then there had been Kevin and his stupid questions and Abby and so many people looking at him and _knowing_ about him. How miserable. It was bad enough that Riko was out there somewhere, probably furious and plotting how to get him back. How he would punish him, even though _none_ of this was Neil’s fault. He hadn’t asked for Andrew to help him in the bathroom, hadn’t instigated the fight or practically kidnapped himself. 

Stupid deal regarding Kevin or not, Neil knows that a storm is coming his way. There was no way one off-smelling Alpha could save him from it.

He spends the next few hours chewing his nails down and purposefully not thinking about anything. It’s something he’s practiced enough to be near-perfect at. Someone knocks on the door and doesn’t come in until he grunts. Abby. 

“We’ve got breakfast ready, and some of the workers and volunteers are here that you might like to meet. They’re here nearly every day, so you might want to get to know them.” She sounds sad, smells an awful lot like guilt under some soft floral scent. “You can meet us down there after you have a shower?”

Like he’ll trust being naked in a small room with even more strangers in the building. “I’m not hungry,” he says as he gets up. There’s nothing for him to change into, so he follows Abby out of the room and down the stairs. He can smell the others’ curiosity from the top step. 

“You’re sure?” Abby asks. “It’s important to keep your stamina after a shock. Low blood sugar won’t help with healing, either.” She’s eyeing his more obvious bruises like she wants to get him into an exam room to look at him all over, but Neil isn’t interested in ever letting that happen again. 

“Ooh, who’s the eye candy?” 

Neil’s head snaps up and he takes a close look at the group sitting at the collected couches and seats. Scent tells him immediately that there are two Betas and three Alphas. They’re all looking at him, tracking his movements behind Abby as she brings him closer.

His steps falter when he realizes who the Alphas are.

“Is this why Wymack called a team meeting? New recruit?” This Alpha is dark with close-cropped hair and a built physique. Reminded Neil of Thea, but not nearly as tall. She’s leaning against a Beta two shades lighter with spiked hair and an obvious height advantage. He has a kind, curious face. She looks just as curious, head tilted to the side.

“Obviously not,” the first Alpha. She’s objectively pretty, blonde and perfectly made up. She has heels on even though Neil knows it can’t be after eight at the latest. Her gaze is sharp when she sweeps it over him. “Charity case, more like.” The male Beta with an arm around her snorts. He’s built like most of the Ravens were, tall and thick with muscle. He looks suspicious and ill-natured. Neil would have to keep an eye on him, too.

“Now, now,” the last Alpha murmurs. “There’s nothing wrong with charity. We’re a charitable cause ourselves.” 

Neil feels his blood run cold when he takes her in. Pale and soft in pastel and pink hair. But there is something lurking in her slanted eyes, something that raised its head and looked right back at him. That thing looked far too much like Lola to make him comfortable. Like it would gut him in his sleep and never blink an eye at his death.

The Alpha smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. She’s obviously cottoned onto the fact that he knows. He wonders if she can smell it. His fear. 

“Speak for yourself, Renee,” blonde Alpha says. “I’ve never taken charity a day in my life.” She brushes the hair away from her face and the Beta’s arm goes with it. She stands up and takes a few steps towards him. She’s taller than him, build more athletic than he first thought. She looks him over, eyes narrowed. “You’re an Omega, aren’t you?”

“Really?” not-Renee. She stands up too and moves closer, eyes wide. “We don’t get many Omegas here. Are you sure, Allison? How do you know?”

“Hard to mistake the haunted look in the eye,” Allison says as she draws closer. 

Neil is frozen in place. Can’t move. He’s known so few female Alphas and they’ve always been more than their fair share of cruel towards him. Even worse, somehow, than their male counterpoints. Like they had something to prove. Now there are three looking at them, one that reminds him far too much of Lola.

Allison reaches out and hooks a finger in the D-ring at the front of his collar. “Not many people who would wear these in broad daylight, either.”

“What’s that? What’s he got on?”

“God, Dan, you really are from under a rock, aren’t you?” Allison rolls her eyes and drops her hand, allowing Neil to breathe freely again. “Omegas get collared by their owners, obviously.”

Dan looks appalled and the emotion is echoed on the face of the Beta she was sitting with. “What the fuck?” 

Allison goes back to her couch and her Beta. “Duh. It’s an archaic practice. Old blood Alpha families resort to it, sometimes, but only when they won’t get caught. Gauche to be caught red handed treating your Omega like a slave.”

“ _Allison_ ,” Abby says, voice a reprimand. “Don’t be rude. Nathaniel is our guest.” She guides Neil to the seat he was in the previous night. Maybe she knows that Neil wouldn’t be comfortable sitting with someone else able to press against him. As it is, he’s surrounded by too many Alphas with too much interest. “I’ll go see about that breakfast.”

He doesn’t say he wouldn’t be able to eat even if he wanted. The churning in his stomach wouldn’t let him keep anything down.

Dan steps into his space and looks at his collar with narrowed eyes. “That can’t be comfortable. But I don’t see a buckle. How do you get it off?”

“The ends are traditionally sewn together so they don’t come off,” Allison drawls. She sounds spectacularly bored as she inspects her nails, but Neil can see the way she glances up at him and can smell her obvious interest. 

“That’s horrible! We’ll have to cut it off, then.” Dan looks determined, like she’s going to go for a knife right away. 

Neil starts to panic, unsure what to do, when the scent of _more_ people hits him. He looks over just in time to see Andrew making his way into the lounge, eyes narrowed dangerously as he takes in the scene.

Despite himself, Neil relaxes when Andrew comes closer. The two Alphas above him snap at each other, and he’s sure it’s going to devolve into a fight, but he’s not worried. If they’re fighting with each other, they aren’t focused on him. He notices Kevin being obvious with his staring but ignores him. He has nothing to say to the Alpha.

The fight is stopped before it begins and Neil has to sit through Wymack and Abby talking like this is just an everyday occurrence. Like so many Alphas and what seem like high-strung Betas can be in a room and function like normal people together.

He escapes their attention and goes upstairs to the roof to gather his thoughts and get a breath of fresh air. Neil doesn’t like feeling trapped, even though that’s all he’s felt for the past three years. Nothing about this situation feels like freedom, either.

-

Neil is left alone after his little game of truths with Andrew. No one else ventures up to the roof to bother him and he’s allowed to mull over his thoughts. Practice, huh? He wondered what _that_ meant. Why would an Alpha need to practice hiding who they were? When would that ever come in handy?

He sighs and pushes his hair back from his face when the wind tries to take off with it. What he said about his parents, that was…only partially true. Sure, his mom was dead from Moriyama men. That was easy enough to admit to. But his father…?

Neil has no clue what was going on with his father. As much as Riko had threatened him with the man, he hadn’t seen him once in his three years at Evermore. Never so much as smelled a hint of him. The Butcher had a distinct smell, one Neil would never forget or mistake for anything else. If he’d been at Evermore, or even around anyone going in and out of the place, Neil would know.

Maybe he _was_ dead. That would be a nice surprise. Kevin had let something slip about the Feds, once, but Neil doubts he’s in prison. His father was always on the Feds’ radar. He wasn’t stupid enough to make a mistake and get himself put away. There’s no way Neil could possibly be that lucky.

He leaves the roof when he notices more cars filling the parking lot and people walking to the building. If his belly is grumbling about the lack of food since yesterday, he ignores it. There might be an opportunity to sneak something, with more people around, but he isn’t worried about that right now.

Neil leans against the railing that goes along the side of the second floor. Like with the roof, he isn’t nearly high enough to fear the consequences of a fall. He observes the rest of the people down on the first floor.

He watches as Dan follows behind Wymack, listening to him talk about something. He gestures his hands as he talks and Dan takes everything in like an overeager puppy. Neil wonders at that relationship, an Alpha clearly so respectful of a Beta like that. Age aside, most Alphas Neil knows don’t give two shits about Betas, most of the time. Certainly not enough to hang off of their every word.

She stops every now and again at her Beta’s side to talk to him. She touches him delicately, like he’s precious to her. Ah, so they’re mated. Not unusual, Neil guesses. Not with how many Betas there were compared to Omegas. If Alphas _only_ mated with Omegas, they would mostly die off, wouldn’t they?

The Beta is surrounded by children after a while, all of them clamoring for his attention. Several of them shout his name, _Matt_ , loud enough for Neil to hear from his second story perch. Matt has a gentle smile and something to say to all of the kids and they look up at him in obvious awe.

Neil frowns, hand drifting to his abdomen. The sight of so many children makes him feel uncomfortable. Even before he was taken to Evermore, he didn’t have many opportunities to interact with children younger than him. His mom never let him. Thought it would trigger some sort of instinct in him that would make him present as an Omega to other people. Too dangerous.

He’d thought about it nearly constantly when he’d first gotten pregnant. About holding a child in his arms and knowing it was his own. Not that he’d be able to keep it for long if it was a male. There was no guarantee, no matter what Ichirou said to him once in a passing whim about daughters. 

He’d thought about a baby growing inside him, leaching off of him to survive. How his own body was what kept it safe and helped it grow. He’d thought, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, having a child. Being pregnant. Not after he already was, anyway. 

Riko had kept his Ravens away after the test turned positive. He looked at Neil in a starving sort of way, but not the way Neil had become accustomed. He hired chefs and nurses and made a Beta trail after Neil for anything he needed. Neil almost mistook it for worry about _him_ , his own wellbeing. But he caught the looks Riko gave his stomach, the way his face went so obviously greedy. 

The more he thought about it, the more scared Neil got. He didn’t _want_ something that could both be used against him and treated the way he had been. God forbid it was an Omega that came out of him. He’d have to live in terror for ten years, just not knowing. Would an Omega child be given back to him, even if they were a boy? Would it just suffer as much as he had?

The dread of what might happen dragged at Neil. It pulled him deeper and deeper into depression and anxiety. How could he let something like that happen? There was no guarantee he would give birth to a girl. A 50 percent chance. And what were the odds he’d have an Omega? He couldn’t remember what the rates were when Omegas and Alphas bred.

It was too much for him. He took a knife to his wrist the day he heard his baby’s heartbeat.

Neil couldn’t allow it to come into a world where it would just be used and abused the way he was, no matter what its presentation. He didn’t plan anything other than his own death. If he was dead, then any potential baby wouldn’t have to suffer. He knew cutting where he did, the way he did, would lead to the quickest end.

He’d been in the bath, hadn’t wanted anyone to have to clean up after him. Riko had given him much freer rein since he’d gotten pregnant, hadn’t had him watched so closely. It had been easy to take a knife from the kitchen and sneak it back to Riko’s bathroom with him when he said he needed some time to himself. No one had thought anything of it, not after the ultrasound and how obviously overwhelmed he was by it.

He’d cut as deeply as he could, deep enough that he couldn’t grasp the knife in his left hand and do the same to his right wrist. It didn’t matter, he was already bleeding so much, it would be enough.

The sound of his baby’s tiny, frantic heartbeat filled his ears as everything went hazy and dark. It would be okay. He and his baby would both go somewhere that was a lot more peaceful.

Neil woke up in a makeshift hospital room and cried over his obvious failure. 

Riko had nearly killed him again once he was healed enough to go back to his own room. He was enraged, furious at Neil for taking things into his own hands. He hadn’t succeeded at killing himself, but he had gotten rid of Riko’s chance at the Main family. Riko would have killed him outright if he didn’t know that Neil was fertile enough to produce him an heir. So, he tried again.

The Alpha had clearly lost some part of his sanity then, and again when the second miscarriage happened. That one wasn’t blamed on Neil, not when they couldn’t prove he’d done it on purpose. How was he supposed to know he couldn’t eat things from the garden? When most of their fresh vegetables came from there? He’d been much further along that time and the miscarriage had been hell. The Beta nurse who was supposed to keep an eye on him found him in the bathroom, blood everywhere. 

Neil didn’t think Riko very sane to begin with, but having two potential heirs ripped away from him obviously changed something in him fundamentally. He’d tattooed Neil after the Ichirou incident, but he collared Neil after the second miscarriage. Branded as nothing other than breeding stock. 

He’d enjoyed parading Neil around like that, afterward, showing everyone what the Omega was. He’d been manic when planning the trip to the club for Neil’s birthday and Neil hadn’t had any clue why until he’d seen Kevin with his own two eyes. 

He tugs on the collar, taking himself out of such grim memories. The kids are in a circle around Matt, listening to the Beta read a story. 

Off to one side of the building, Renee is talking to a few adults about what he has to assume is God. There’s a big cross on the wall and a banner about the Lord. What someone like Renee is doing preaching about God, he could not begin to fathom.

Allison is sat at a desk across the room from Renee, near where Wymack and Abby’s offices are. There’s another office that’s closed and someone’s sitting outside of it. No one Neil knows. Allison is on her phone, obviously angry about whatever whoever she’s talking to is saying to her. The irritation coming off her is enough for him to smell, even up here. 

As he’s searching for the others, the office door opens and Andrew comes out. He smells like a mix of emotions, something Neil can’t really place, not from so far away. He watches the Alpha walk quickly across the length of the building and speak to Kevin. Andrew’s eyes flick up to where Neil is, but Neil can’t catch them before Andrew is turning and leaving, Kevin following right behind.

Neil sighs and slumps further against the railing. He’s drained. Maybe he really should sleep.

There’s a lock on the inside of the door he finds when he actually checks. It’s not a strong-looking one, but he would definitely wake up if someone was trying to pick it or force the door. Neil stands with his hand on the door for a long time, trying to decide if it’s a good idea or not. Letting himself be vulnerable around all these people.

His inability to keep his eyes open after every blink is what decides it. He locks the door and then climbs into bed, allowing his body’s exhaustion to take him away.

-

Someone is pounding on his door. Neil blinks awake in an instant, shoving off his bed so he can put it between him and whoever’s there. It takes him a few moments to collect himself, to realize he’s at the Foxhole Court and not Evermore. If someone is knocking at his door, it’s probably not Riko or one of his Ravens come for him.

“What?” he asks, voice way less stable than he wanted. 

“Nathaniel, we need to talk,” Kevin says impatiently.

“Doesn’t he want to go by something else? We should probably respect his wishes.” A voice Neil vaguely remembers from the night before. The unnamed Beta related to Andrew somehow. 

“Shut up, Nicky, I didn’t ask your opinion.” 

“Okay, rude.”

Kevin and Nicky continue squabbling while Neil breathes in and out, centering himself. If he’s going to deal with Kevin, he has to be as settled as possible. It’s the only way he won’t go after the Alpha with his teeth.

When he opens the door, he’s not surprised to see Andrew standing behind Kevin and Nicky, back to the banister where Neil stood hours before. Nicky blinks at him from over Kevin’s shoulder. 

“Hey there, Sleeping Beauty. Nice to see you again.” He doesn’t smell nervous like he did that morning or scared like the previous night. He’s excited about something, and while excitement usually spells something terrible for Neil, his is…innocent. 

Neil nods at the Beta and edges slowly out of the room, watching Kevin warily. He doesn’t want to talk to the Alpha, and he thought he made that pretty clear this morning. Kevin follows as he makes his way to the stairs.

“Nathaniel—”

“Neil.”

“Nicky, shut _up_. _Neil_!”

“ _What_ , Kevin?” Neil stops on a step a few from the bottom and turns around to glare at Kevin. “What do you _want_? I already told you to leave me _alone_.” 

Kevin looks taken aback. “But _why_?” he asks plaintively. “I need to know how you’re doing, and you won’t _talk_ to me.”

“How I’m doing? Clearly, pretty shitty!” Neil gestures to himself. “You have eyes, don’t you? I know your nose doesn’t work for shit, but you can still _see_ , right?”

A hurt look takes over Kevin’s face, but Neil doesn’t care, he doesn’t _care_ if he hurt Kevin, Kevin _deserves_ it.

“Neil…” 

Kevin reaches out, like he’s going to grab him or touch him, or _something_ and Neil jerks back out of his reach, can’t help it, he doesn’t want to be _touched_. His foot slips on the step and he falls. He can see Nicky and Kevin’s faces turn to shock and over their shoulder, Andrew’s eyes go the slightest bit wider. It can’t be too bad a fall, he won’t get too hurt, he—

He falls against something that feels like being caught by a brick wall. The breath punches out of him and when he tries to take it back again, all he can smell is Beta and worry. He looks up and sees Matt’s concerned face hovering above him. Neil can smell Dan somewhere nearby.

“Oh my gosh, Neil, are you okay?” Nicky asks, coming down the stairs quickly. His hands are up like he wants to put them somewhere, but he’s unsure where he should. “Kevin, you _asshole_ ,” he says over his shoulder at the Alpha still halfway up the stairs.

Matt carefully steadies Neil until he’s upright again and then takes his hands away. “You okay?” he repeats.

Neil’s face feels hot from embarrassment and shame at these people seeing him acting like an idiot. “I’m _fine_. Just leave me alone.”

Dan peers at him from over Matt’s shoulder, which means she must be on her tip-toes. She narrows her eyes at Kevin up the stairs. “Jesus, Day. Can’t you leave him alone? He clearly doesn’t want to talk to you.”

It’s a surprise, hearing an Alpha stick up for him against another Alpha. That’s never happened before. He’d have guessed Dan would tell him to suck it up and go off with Kevin. Andrew seemed like he just wanted to tell Kevin no, plus he was _odd_ , but to have another Alpha defend him…

Kevin looks just as surprised and he smells guilty when he comes down the stairs. “I didn’t mean, I just. He was…it’s not my _fault_.” He stumbles over his words, clearly unsure what to say.

“No, it’s never _your_ fault, is it?” Neil sneers. “Kevin Day, nothing’s ever _his_ fault. Things just happen to him without his say-so. An innocent victim of circumstance.”

Nicky snickers and then quickly covers his mouth with his hands, glancing at Kevin guiltily. There’s a dull flush on Kevin’s cheeks that belies his humiliation and anger. Neil can smell it clearly enough.

“He has a point,” Andrew says. He’s still on the stairs and he looks bored. “You do tend to play the victim.”

Kevin’s clearly had enough. He pushes past them all, not careful with his elbows. His shame and frustration are potent. He stomps over to Abby’s office and slams the door after himself. Good.

Neil doesn’t feel bad. Why should he. If Kevin is going to be a pushy asshole, Neil is going to be one right back. He’s stayed quiet too many times for the Alpha, he won’t be forced into it, not here. Not now.

Andrew finally makes his way down the stairs to Neil’s side. “What say we get you something to eat. Must be mighty hungry after all that humble pie you just served.” He has his hands in his pockets and is looking off into the distance, casual as all get out, but Neil can smell the faint amusement on him.

It’s…nice, to know he’s made Andrew laugh. He doesn’t know why it’s nice, not yet, but it is. He nods.

“Ah, why don’t you let one of us get that thing off?” Dan says. She’s got both hands on Matt’s shoulders and is using him to push herself up so she can look at them all properly. It would be easier to just move in front of the Beta, but she seems content where she is.

Neil shoots her a look. She might have defended him, but there’s no way he’s letting her anywhere near him with a knife. 

“You’re doing it again, Wilds,” Andrew says with a grin that shows off his teeth. “Stay on your side of the island.”

Dan scowls. “Who says he’s a Monster like you?”

Andrew leans in very close. “I think you’ll find that Neil is every bit the monster I am.”

-

They go to Wymack’s office, of all places. The Beta looks up at them and then rolls his eyes.

“Do I want to know why you’re here?” he asks gruffly.

Andrew grins at him, too. “Probably not. Best go soothe your second in command. I think some of her feathers are ruffled.”

“What the hell did you do, Minyard?” Wymack barks out, standing up immediately and rushing out before they can say anything else.

“What a mother hen.” Andrew gestures Neil in and shuts the door after them. He goes to the desk and starts rummaging around while Neil takes a seat in front of it, where he assumes Wymack likes his guests to sit. “We’ve got something for what ails you,” he says, holding up a candy bar and a half-empty bottle of scotch. He shakes them both when Neil stays quiet.

“I don’t like sweets,” Neil says. “And I don’t drink.” 

Andrew pouts. “Spoilsport.” He sets the candy bar and alcohol on the desk and goes looking for something else. Eventually he throws a protein bar at Neil and keeps something else in his hand.

Neil catches the protein bar out of habit, but his eyes don’t leave the knife in Andrew’s hand. “What’s that for?”

“Hmm.” Andrew moves the knife this way and that, letting it reflect the light from overhead. “Usually? No clue. Wymack is an interesting man. He’s got interesting things.” He points the knife at Neil. “For now? To cut that thing from around your neck.”

His hand goes to his throat before he’s fully aware he’s even moved. The leather is warm from his body temperature. It’s been on long enough that he doesn’t even remember it’s there when it’s not being used against him. He’s had plenty of time to get used to it even then.

“Scared?” Andrew asks. He has the bottle of scotch opened and to his mouth before Neil can think of what to answer. He puts that down and goes for the candy bar next. Neil nearly gags at the combination of scents, say nothing of how it must taste. 

“I’m not scared,” Neil says slowly. He’s…not. Surprisingly. Riko will punish him when he takes him back, collar or no. Taking it off won’t make things any better or worse. But Neil shouldn’t be so quick to trust an Alpha with a knife to his neck. He certainly doesn’t trust Dan or Allison or, god, _Renee_ to do it. The blade is sharp-looking, good enough to slit a throat, and Andrew handles it like he’s familiar with them. If the smell of metal around him means anything, he probably is.

“So?” Andrew wiggles the knife at him and Neil lets his hand go back to his lap. Andrew narrows his eyes. “Are you that trusting, or that stupid?” he asks. Before Neil can say anything, he’s around the desk, knife at Neil’s throat. He looks down at the Omega, eyes hollow. “Do you think I won’t?”

Neil reaches up and touches Andrew’s wrist. “I don’t think you’d hesitate,” he says softly. When he talks, his skin brushes against the knife and while that sends shivers of terror through his body, it’s not because of _Andrew_. “But you made me a deal.”

Andrew holds his gaze for a long time, seemingly searching for something. Finally, he huffs and draws back, knife against Neil’s collar instead of his throat. “Just that stupid, then,” he says under his breath.

He uses his other hand to slide two fingers under the collar. He has to be able to feel Neil’s pulse pounding against them, but he doesn’t say anything about it. Instead, Andrew pulls the collar away and sets the knife against the leather. He saws at it long enough that Neil feels a little dizzy from how shallowly he’s breathing. Eventually, it falls apart, and Andrew pulls away, knife in one hand, collar in the other.

Neil takes a deep breath and sits back. The collar has the Moriyama crest burned on the inside and Neil knows there’s probably a faint impression left on his throat from it. It might be hidden by the burns and scars there, though. How would he know. He rubs at his throat and knows it’s probably a little raw.

Andrew’s fingers tighten around the collar as he continues watching Neil chafe at his throat. “Another attempt at your life?” he asks, nodding at the scars.

“These?” Neil touches where he knows the rope burns are. “No, I don’t think so. At least not from me. Riko probably wasn’t trying to kill me.” He might have been, but Neil wouldn’t know that, either. It was a toss-up, the last few months, if Riko really wanted to kill him or not. He wonders vaguely if madness is genetic for Moriyamas. Ichirou hadn’t seemed mad, though, and Tetsuji controlled himself with an iron will that was almost respectable.

“Were you hiding them from the others? Ashamed? Is that why you wouldn’t let them take it off?”

Neil pauses. “Ashamed? Of what? The scars?” He rubs his thumb over the longest one, too close to the jugular for comfort. “Or, who put them there? Why should I be?” He shrugs. “I just didn’t want any of them anywhere near me with a knife.”

“Not even Abby?”

“Especially her.”

That obviously catches Andrew’s curiosity. His head quirks to the side. “Why?”

“Is that your question?”

Andrew thinks it over to himself. He sets the knife down on Wymack’s desk and dumps the collar in the trashcan beside it. Picking the scotch back up, he sits down and nods. “Yes. That’s my question.”

“She could have reported to the authorities, what was happening to me at Evermore. Back when she treated me. She didn’t. She just let it keep happening, content to follow Riko’s orders. If she’d said something, they never would have triggered my heat in the first place.”

Neil doesn’t know if that’s true, if Abby really could have done anything. But she worked for a safe house and obviously knew how to get people out of bad situations, how to smuggle medicine to them. If anyone was in a position to get him out, back when he was first taken, it would have been her. Should have been. She should have tried.

Andrew takes another swig of scotch. Nods. “Reasonable.” 

“You have another question,” Neil says after a few minutes of silence have passed. He’s already eaten his protein bar to pass the time. 

“I know.”

“Are you going to ask it?”

“I’m trying to decide if I want to save it for later or not.”

Neil frowns. “That doesn’t seem very fair. Then I won’t be able to ask anything.”

Andrew taps the side of his nose. “You’re learning.”

When it seems like Andrew really _is_ going to hold off on asking until later, he finally asks:

“Why Neil?”

It’s not the question he expected. It throws him off a little, actually. Of all the questions, his preference in names wasn’t even in the top ten. Andrew seems to interpret his stunned silence as a refusal to answer. 

“I mean, Nathaniel has Neil in it, technically, but that seems like a shitty reason to use it. Was it something your friends used to call you? Childhood crush?”

Neil licks his bottom lip and shakes his head. “No. Jean, I’m sure you know him, right?” He waits until Andrew nods to continue. “He said I needed something to differentiate myself from what they made me. If I could think of someone else, _be_ someone else, I could survive what they did.”

Jean had told them that one day after he cleaned Neil up and brought him out of the basement. He’d run his fingers through Neil’s curls, untangling them and making them sit right on his head.

“You need to be someone else, in here,” he’d said softly, stroking Neil’s forehead. His fingers were always so rough and calloused, from his work or something else, Neil didn’t know. “They can’t touch whoever’s in here.”

Neil had thought about it. He thought maybe _Abram_ , but that was his mom’s name for him, when she needed him to really listen. It was a name his father knew, presumably Riko as well. As much as it was his, it wasn’t solely his, not anymore. He couldn’t be any of the names he’d been on the run, not Alex or Stefan or Chris. None of those names had ever fit, anyway. 

He thought about the way Jean said his name with his Marseilles accent, the uptake at the end of it. Neil just fit, when he thought of his name in Jean’s voice. Jean was the first person Neil told, just before Jean went away. 

Of course, Neil had always thought Jean was killed because of his kindness towards Neil. That’s what Riko always alluded to, anyway. Him and Thea both. Neil doesn’t really know _how_ to feel about knowing they’re both alive and got out with Kevin. That they left him. Maybe he doesn’t hate them as much as he hates Kevin, because they’re not around for him to hate, or just because he’d thought they were dead for so long and mourned them. Maybe he was too grateful they were alive to care that they betrayed him just as much as Kevin had. He wonders if he’d want to see Jean again.

Andrew sets the bottle down on the desk hard enough to jar Neil from his thoughts. “Escapism has never been my thing,” he says. He sounds blithe enough, but Neil doesn’t really think he’s being unkind. 

The door slams open and Neil jumps. Wymack looks between the two of them suspiciously and then spots the nearly-empty scotch bottle. “God _dammit_ , Minyard, can you seriously not understand what ‘underage’ means?”

Andrew grins at him. “Can you not understand what ‘I don’t give a shit’ means?” He gets up and heads to the door with his hands up though when Wymack starts to growl. “Easy. Just needed some liquid courage to get something done. Isn’t that how Kevin keeps functioning?”

He laughs at the face Wymack makes at that and Neil hurries to follow him out of the office, twitching when the Beta slams the door after them.

“Is it smart to antagonize him like that?” Neil asks. He’s never met a Beta who seems to exude so much natural Alpha-ness as Wymack. Maybe he just needs to redefine what he thinks of as a Beta or an Alpha. 

Andrew waves a hand. “He’s all bark, no bite. Even his milk teeth were filed down.”

Neil doesn’t get the joke but he goes along with it anyways.

“Nicky was going to invite you to the Mall to get some clothes. I can’t say he’s wrong. Wymack’s stuff makes you look like a poorer Oliver Twist.”

New clothes. Ones he could pick out himself. Wouldn’t that be a concept. Riko had chosen everything he wore for three years, and before that he chose what his mom did—muted, baggy things that kept people from looking at him twice. Usually purchased from the Goodwill or other second-hand shops. 

But the Mall meant people. Lots of people. Neil hasn’t been to a Mall in years, but he remembers how crowded they are, how much they stink like the feelings of so many people pressed into a small space. There was no telling how many Betas there would be, how many Alphas. Maybe even an Omega or two. He didn’t really know where they were, they’d driven for hours before they’d gotten to the club. So, there was no way to know the general makeup of designations for the area.

Andrew watches him visibly panic over the choice he should make. “I can just tell him your sizes and send Allison to keep him from making you his next neon rainbow travesty.”

Neil has no clue why he would ask Allison, or why the Alpha would even agree to go, but he doesn’t care, regardless. He can’t face a Mall. Not when just being in this building with less than 30 people has him feeling hesitant enough as it is, and he sort of knows almost half of them. He nods.

“Okay.” 

He moves to go find his cousin and Neil stops him by putting his hand out. Neil is very careful not to touch him, or even get too close. He has a feeling Andrew is very particular about being touched on his own terms.

“If I take a shower, will you stand outside the door? I don’t…” he grabs his bottom lip and tugs on it. “There are a lot of people here.” A lot of Alphas, he doesn’t say. He doesn’t think he needs to. 

Andrew studies him, head tilted to the side again. It’s like he can look through Neil, to the inner workings of him. Like he knows exactly what Neil’s thinking and why. “I can do that.”

“What will I owe you?”

That almost makes Andrew smile and he touches the side of his nose again. “What will you give me?”

“Anything.” It’s a risky bargain, one Neil has given before and regretted. He has a feeling Andrew won’t make him regret it.

Andrew’s almost smile drops and he stares at Neil. “Stupid,” he says finally. “No sense of self-preservation.”

Neil feels his own lips twitch. “Not much self left to preserve.”

“Go upstairs, idiot.” 

Neil does just that.

-

There’s no reason for Neil to feel safe enough to get undressed in this building for any prolonged amount of time, but he still does when Andrew knocks on the door to announce his presence. That’s when Neil finally strips and gets into the shower. The bathroom is just as bare as the bedroom, even though it smells of infinitely more people, scents all mixed up. There’s generic toiletries in the shower, nothing overpowering or distinction-specific.

Neil has no guarantee that Andrew will stand outside the bathroom and wait the whole time he’s taking a shower. None at all. Somehow, he doesn’t think Andrew will walk away until Neil’s done. Some instinct tells him so.

He thinks about Andrew while he’s bathing. Andrew is…he’s gentle. Maybe not in the traditional sense, but something about him is careful and quiet. Nothing about him rubs up against Neil the wrong way, doesn’t irritate him the way almost every other Alpha Neil has ever met does. Maybe there’s some broken thing in him that calls out to the broken thing inside Neil. He doesn’t know for sure.

But he doesn’t feel unsafe around Andrew. They made a deal that Andrew would have his back, would protect him. While Andrew might not know fully what he was protecting Neil from, he has the feeling that Andrew will do his damnedest to make sure he holds up his end of the bargain. He can…trust that. It makes absolutely no sense, but Neil really thinks he can trust Andrew for that much.

He focuses on himself while he finishes cleaning up. There are bruises and cuts and bite marks all over his arms and legs, but those will heal in time. He doesn’t have to worry about them. More important are the stitches lining his abdomen and chest from Riko’s latest fun. They’re probably ready to come out. 

Neil runs a finger down the long scar on his abdomen. It’s still pink and puffy, freshly healed. It was from where they’d tried to save the baby, he’d been told. He was far enough along that it might be viable outside of him, but it’d already been dead by the time they got it out. He’d been glad of that, glad nothing from him had had to take a single breath in this terrible world for even one second.

He turns the shower off and grabs one of the towels that are stacked on a shelf next to it to dry off. On a close inspection of the medicine cabinet and under the sink, Neil finds everything he needs to remove his stitches. He washes out the plastic container then fills it with enough rubbing alcohol to sterilize the tweezers and scissors and then dries himself off while they soak. 

The rubbing alcohol is cold on his skin when he swipes the cotton ball over his stitches, but he can ignore that. There might be one or two individual stitches that aren’t ready, but it’s better if he doesn’t keep any of them in. That way there’s no risk of him ripping them. He uses the tweezers to lift knots and the scissors to cut them carefully but quickly. He’s done this too many times to need to take his time.

There’s a knock on the door. “Everything alright in there?” Andrew asks cautiously. Neil wonders if he can smell the rubbing alcohol.

“Almost done,” he says.

Just as he’d suspected, a few of the stitches bleed after he’s cut them out, but he can live with that. He covers those places with gauze and medical tape and then slips back into the sweatpants and oversized hoodie Wymack had lent him. It’s not ideal to put dirty clothes back on, but they don’t smell of anything other than his own sweat, and that’s fine. 

He puts everything back where he found it after washing everything off, and opens the door to Andrew’s suspicious stare. 

“Okay?”

“I’m fine.”

Andrew’s eyes narrow. “I have the sneaking suspicion that you say, ‘I’m fine’ when you really mean, ‘I’m bleeding out’.”

It’s an astute observation. Maybe he smelled the blood instead of the rubbing alcohol. “I really am fine, though,” he says instead. “Not much I can’t handle.”

“Hm.”

Andrew leads him back to the door that goes to the roof. He takes out a battered cigarette pack and offers one to Neil. Neil takes it, even though he doesn’t really enjoy the act of smoking. The smell is comforting. His mom smoked, so the smell reminds him of her. He’s pretty sure Thea did, too. He occasionally smelled it on her when she was looking after him. 

He thinks about Thea as he gazes out on the parking lot and past it. She’d never been a big source of comfort, Thea. But she had been a steady presence until she was suddenly gone. Neil could always trust her to speak her mind and not put up with him—or Kevin. He’d known the two of them were lovers fairly quickly. They couldn’t mask the smell of one another, not from him. He didn’t think anyone else at Evermore had known, and he’d never said anything. 

He never knew what Thea saw in Kevin. He was a coward, even then. Pushy and demanding and high-strung. Thea was older and so down to Earth. Neil had no idea how she could have tolerated the Alpha. But they’d stayed together as long as they’d been at Evermore with him. They might be together, still, even though Thea was in Houston and Kevin was here. Wherever here was.

“What city is this?” he asks once his cigarette has burned out.

Andrew eyes him. “Is that your question?”

“Of course not. I just don’t know where we are.”

“Palmetto. It’s outside of Charleston.” 

Neil tenses. “West Virginia?” It didn’t _feel_ like West Virginia. Too hot for the middle of January. But what would he know? He was barely let out of Evermore as it was, maybe they were going through a heatwave.

Andrew looks at him like he’s stupid. Neil has the feeling it won’t be the last time that happens. “South Carolina.”

Surprise makes Neil say, “Really?” before he can stop himself. 

“Why would I lie about that?”

“I don’t think you would.” 

Neil’s just surprised, that’s all. He really didn’t expect to be so far away from Riko and Evermore, even if West Virginia wasn’t _really_ all that far away. It was far enough. West Virginia was worlds away from Baltimore, and that was a shorter distance than Evermore to here.

Andrew is still looking at him like he’s not all there, so Neil points to the plot of land past the parking lot. “What’s that for? I can see something out there.”

“Community garden, supposedly.” Andrew’s eyes follow Neil’s finger to the grassy field. “Renee said it would help rehabilitate people and benefit the food pantry or something.”

Neil shivers at the mention of the Alpha. He can’t help it. There’s just something so unsettling about her, something that was hiding behind her eyes but woke up just to look at him. 

Andrew huffs out a laugh. “You’re afraid of her,” he says.

“You should be, too. She’s not safe.” Not for Andrew, definitely not for Neil. 

“She’s not going to do anything unless pushed. She’s a pacifist now.”

Neil snorts. “People like her aren’t pacifists.” 

Andrew opens his mouth to argue with him, but is interrupted by his phone chirping. He takes it out and reads it then makes a disgusted face at whatever’s there. “Nicky says Allison was being impossible, so they’re on their way back. Just have to stop at the phone store first.”

“Why the phone store?” 

There’s that look again. “Because we need to be able to get ahold of you.”

“Why? Where am I going that you can’t find me?”

Andrew rolls his eyes. “Besides over the side of the roof from how annoying you are? I don’t know Neil. Maybe there’s someone out there in this wide world you might want to talk to again.” He gives Neil a significant look.

Neil doesn’t know if he’s ready to talk to the people Andrew is probably hinting about. Not right now, certainly. So, he ignores it and focuses on the first part of his answer.

“Go ahead and push. I’ll just drag you down with me.”

Andrew narrows his eyes and ashes his cigarette, flicks the butt over the edge the way Neil has seen him do several times, now. “Watch it, kid. You just might tempt me.”

He stands up and heads for the door and, like a piece of driftwood caught in his wake, Neil is inexplicably pulled to follow behind.


	6. Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An interview ends in disaster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyy. we're back at it. this chapter has the thing i told you i was excited about. i don't want to spoil it for you, but it's definitely going to be a fun twist. i'm really enjoying playing with the timeline, even if i don't stick to it exactly and probably won't include everything from the books (how can i? there's zero stickball, so that takes out a bunch of it). allison is awesome in this chapter, because i love allison and i want her and neil to be friends in every fic. and since this is MY fic, they will be friends.
> 
> chapter warnings/spoilers: panic attack? i really think that's the only warning. kevin is a huge giant dickbag, but that's not much of a surprise. this is a surprisingly tame chapter.
> 
> enjoy!

“This all seems like…a little much,” Neil says slowly as he looks at the collected boxes and bags in the lounge. They’d gotten a few curious glances as the Court closed its business hours and people left. Neil was certainly curious why anyone who knew Riko would be coming to get him at any moment would go out and buy what looks to be an entire wardrobe.

Allison waves her hand. “It really isn’t, believe me. We would’ve gotten more, but _someone_ was being difficult.” She narrows her eyes at Nicky.

“Hey! I wasn’t the one being difficult! You hated all my suggestions!” Nicky pouts. “There was nothing wrong with what I picked.”

“If you don’t mind being a walking billboard for twinks, sure,” Allison drawls. 

Neil ignores their bickering and pokes through the bags. No neon colors, like Andrew threatened, but everything looks comfortable and fashionable. It looks expensive, too.

“Who paid for all this? I can’t pay you back.” Neil knows his mom still had stashes of money hidden around the world before she was killed, but there was no guarantee the Moriyamas didn’t find it all if they had his notebook. Even if they didn’t, Neil had no clue where to start looking.

Nicky makes a face and doesn’t look Neil in the eyes. “Well…Allison offered, but we _do_ have a resident millionaire who stubbornly refused to allow anyone but him to pay for it.” He fishes a black credit card out of his pocket and throws it at Kevin, who’s still sulking off to the side.

“Then I don’t want it,” Neil says, dropping the bag he was currently going through. “I don’t need anything from him. I won’t be bribed.”

Allison rolls her eyes. “Don’t be stubborn. Does it really matter where your charity comes from? It’s not like you have anything with you besides those club clothes. Or do you have some hidden cash reserves you haven’t mentioned yet?” She’s blunt, almost brutal about it, but she does unfortunately have a point.

Neil looks at the collected bags and boxes strewn about. He certainly doesn’t need everything, he can just leave the tags on the stuff he doesn’t touch, so they can return things after he’s gone. That thought makes him feel slightly less bad about taking anything from Kevin Day.

“Fine,” he says. “Thanks.” He directs the word to Allison and Nicky, but if Kevin looks up hopefully at it, that’s not Neil’s problem. 

“Now that that touching scene is out of the way,” Andrew drawls from his perch on the couch not covered in shopping. “Is it time to go home?”

The thought of Andrew leaving makes panic shoot through Neil briefly, but he gets himself under control quickly enough. Not quick enough that Andrew doesn’t shoot him a look over it, but no one mentions it.

“I thought Neil could put on a fashion show, let us know if everything we got fits right. I was mostly guessing at what would look best on him,” Allison says. She puts her hands on her hips. “I also want to fix that mop of hair on his head. You look homeless, and not in a good way. Our clients are supposed to look more improved after we’ve gotten our hands on them.”

“That’s good,” Kevin says before Neil can even begin to worry about an Alpha coming near him with a pair of scissors. “Since he’ll be coming on Kathy’s show with me tomorrow, we need him to look as presentable as possible.”

It’s silent for a moment, and then voices break out all at once.

“Kathy’s show? What? Since when?”

“Does Wymack know what you’re planning?”

“Isn’t it too soon to make him go on live television?”

“Have you asked Neil if that’s what he wants?”

The outpouring of support in his favor is bizarre and stuns Neil for a few seconds into silence. He looks over at Andrew while Kevin starts to argue with Nicky and Allison. Andrew is staring at him. He makes a gesture for Neil to say something. 

Neil looks at the group of arguing Alphas and Beta. They’re gaining the attention of the rest of what Andrew referred to as the Foxes. Matt and Dan head over, with Renee trailing behind like she’s ready to rally for peace. Aaron looks up from his phone to take them all in before going back to it. Even Wymack sticks his head out of his office to find out what the arguing is about. He makes eye contact with Neil, then rolls his eyes and motions him over.

“Kevin drop a bomb on you?” Wymack asks when Neil is within hearing range. 

He’s still a bit nervous of the Beta, if only because he’s male and the approximate right age and build for his father. Doesn’t have the painful Alpha presence, though, so that goes a long way to helping.

“I’m supposed to go somewhere tomorrow?”

Wymack rolls his eyes again and leans against his doorway. “Yeah, about that. Kevin was scheduled to go on the Kathy Ferdinand show tomorrow. It’s been in the works for ages. He’s trying to get us on the map, bring in a few more donors. The Kayleigh Day foundation’s been great to us, but one donor can only do so much, y’know?”

Neil doesn’t know, but he nods along gamely. “Why does that involve me?”

“It’s important for the country to see what we do here, who we help,” Kevin says from behind Neil, startling him badly enough to jump. 

He’d been paying attention to Wymack, hadn’t been thinking about what was behind him, and that was a mistake. One Neil very rarely made. With so many Alphas under one roof, he knew better than to let his guard down. He looks at Alpha, at Andrew standing impassively behind him and the curious faces of the Foxes beyond that.

“Why me?” Neil asks once his heartrate is back to normal. “Don’t you have other clients? You took me in yesterday.” 

Putting his face on national television wasn’t a good idea. Riko would see, or his father’s people, and that would just put him in more danger. Put everyone here in danger. Plus, it wasn’t like he’d be here long, not with Riko coming to get him. Having him go in front of cameras and talk about a program he knew nothing about, only to get whisked away and taken back to Evermore would be pointless.

Kevin waves a hand. “Unfortunately, people don’t care much about the plights of Betas, which is who we serve primarily, even though roughly eighty-five percent of the population is Beta. There’s still a stigma against Alphas who ask for help, too. Something about it not being proper to act outside your distinction.” He looks back at Andrew very briefly, then back to Neil. “It’s trendy to be an advocacy group for Omegas. People _care_ about the plight of the Omega.”

“Or they at least pretend to,” Allison says snidely. “Traditionalists don’t give a shit, but that mentality has largely fallen to the wayside in the past few years. There are holdouts, of course, but they know the importance of acting one way for the public.” 

“So, you want to parade Neil in front of a bunch of cameras to, what, make people pity him and give us money?” Dan asks. She sounds mad.

“That sounds really shitty,” Nicky pipes up. Matt nods in agreement.

Kevin rolls his eyes. “You don’t _get_ it. We need investors for this place, backers besides my mom’s foundation. If we want to do everything you all talk about, if we want to get some credibility, we need to do this. We need to show the community what we do, who we do it for.” He points at Neil. “He’s the way to get checkbooks opened. Alphas will feel some instinctual urge to help him, and Betas will feel bad. We might even get more Omegas asking us to help them.” He looks around at all of them. “Isn’t that what you wanted? A place that was designed to help everyone, no matter what their situation, their distinction?”

Neil has never heard Kevin sound so…passionate, before. Not even about history, which Neil knows is his favorite subject. He sounds like he really believes in what he’s saying, like he really does want to make a difference.

He sounds like the one recording of Kayleigh Day Neil has ever heard, where she gave a speech about workplace equality. Neil has never thought they had much in common besides their looks. But maybe this is something else.

“Unfortunately, Kevin is correct,” Wymack says. He stands up straight and looks at all of them. “As much as I appreciate all the work you all do, I still have to keep the lights on. We need donations and investors if we want to keep this place alive.”

As noble as their cause is, Neil doesn’t care. He has zero desire to go on television. Not when that’ll put him at more risk. 

“I don’t want to,” he says when it’s been sufficiently quiet for long enough.

Kevin’s eyes narrow. “What do you mean you don’t want to? Did you not hear what we just said?”

“I don’t care.” 

“I don’t care what you want or care about,” Kevin says in rapid-fire French. “You’re doing the show.”

Neil grits his teeth. He regrets ever thinking any not-horrible thing about the Alpha. “No, I’m not,” he replies in the same language, aware of everyone staring at them. “You know how dangerous it is for me to be in front of a camera, what my father’s people—”

“You listen to me.” Kevin takes a step forward and Neil shrinks back at the anger coming off of him. “You will do this. If you don’t, if you’re of no use to me, you might as well go back to Evermore. If you can’t fight this battle, then there’s no point to your freedom.”

There’s a sick twist in his stomach that feels a bit like he’s going to throw up. Neil knows Kevin is capable of cruelty, but he hasn’t had to face it head-on like this, before. It would be impressive if Neil wasn’t being coerced by it now.

“What’s going on?” Nicky asks in German, making Neil twitch. “Did we know they both spoke French?”

“You’ve heard Day speak to Moreau haven’t you, dumbass?” Aaron replies. He’s still looking at his phone but his fingers aren’t moving, so he’s obviously paying attention. “If they all came from the same place, wouldn’t it make sense they share a common language?”

“Look at the little detective,” Andrew drawls. He speaks in English, so everyone looks confused by his words and the angry flush that creeps over Aaron’s cheeks. “Kevin, I have a hard time keeping up when you speak in tongues.”

Kevin ignores him. “So, will you help?” he continues in French. “Or should I put you back where I found you?”

“ _Kevin_.” Andrew sounds less amused.

The churning in Neil’s stomach compels Neil to answer. “Okay,” he says in English. “I’ll do it.” He sounds miserable to his own ears, so there’s no way no one else picks up on it.

Wymack shifts. “Neil, if you don’t want—”

“It’s settled, then,” Kevin says. He turns to Allison. “You said you would cut his hair?”

Allison is quiet for a pause before she nods. “Yeah. C’mon, Neil. There’s a bathroom down here with everything I need.” She reaches out and grabs Neil’s arm, drags him away from the concerned looks and narrowed eyes surrounding him.

-

Neil doesn’t have time to be uncomfortable with Allison before she pushes them into the bathroom and shuts the door after them. He should feel nervous, terrified even, to be around such an aggressive Alpha. All he feels is miserable at Kevin’s ultimatum.

He’s aware that Allison is studying him, but he can’t bring himself to care. It’s not like this place is any different than Evermore, not really. Not deep down. Who cares what the Alpha decides to do to him.

“Day can’t decide on his own to kick you out, you know.” Her French has a horrible accent that would make Neil laugh if he wasn’t so startled.

He looks up at her with wide eyes. There’s a mulish set to her mouth.

“He’s not the be all, end all around here.” She’s switched back to English, thank god. “He doesn’t get to make decisions that affect us, and he certainly couldn’t throw you out. Not without a fight.”

“Isn’t he your biggest donor?”

Allison rolls her eyes. “His mom’s foundation is. He might be the executor of her estate now, but the continued support of the Foxhole Court was written into a legally binding contract before she died. Even if we never listened to a single thing he ever said again, we’d still get a donation every year from the Day Foundation. Nothing he can do about that.”

Neil remembers someone mentioning something about Allison working in advocacy. Maybe it wasn’t just a title. She seems to know what she was talking about, certainly.

“You wouldn’t kick me out? Even if I didn’t help?” he asks quietly, going back to inspecting the floor.

The annoyed scent that was filling the room before changes. Turns almost…kind. “That’s not what we’re about, here,” Allison says. She squats down until she can look up at him. He’s impressed she can manage in heels that high. “Even if you never decided to help us. Even if you said fuck us and left tomorrow for somewhere else.” She smiles and it looks nice on her. Worlds away from the superior smirks and sly smiles she’s had on during the day. 

“Wymack has a thing about building families, making sure people are safe. That’s his only goal. If we kicked you to the curb now, we’d be betraying that mission, wouldn’t we?” She reaches up to cup his cheeks and Neil doesn’t even flinch. “I don’t know your story. I don’t care if I never do. But this place has helped me and I think it can help you, too.” 

Neil searches her eyes and her scent for any hint of a lie. There is, surprisingly, none. He nods and relaxes when she lets him go. 

“Now, let’s see about that hair.”

-

Neil can’t help but touch the shaved sides of his head. He keeps catching himself rubbing his fingers over the fuzz left, marveling at the prickly feeling, and then rushing to take his hand away so no one notices. He can’t help it. He’s never had a haircut quite so fashionable, before. Usually when his mom cut his hair, it was always something that wouldn’t stand out or get him noticed. Other than the first time Riko had Neil’s hair done, he usually just got angry and chopped off hunks of it at random. Jean would try to keep it as much one length as he could, but it was hard when there were parts cut down near his head. 

This haircut is obviously trendy, with the shorn sides and the length of hair kept long on top that keeps flopping into his eyes. Allison said that once it dried his curls wouldn’t be in his eyes so much, but Neil doesn’t mind. It’s a nice cut, and Allison was nice for doing it. Nice for going out and getting him clothes that fit and feel nice against his skin. She’s just weirdly nice, even if her boyfriend is an asshole.

“Nice look, Princess,” Seth had sneered when Neil was coming downstairs after putting his new wardrobe away. There was no way he could’ve known that that word made Neil feel such cold dread in his stomach. He was just being a jerk. It didn’t stop Neil from hunching down and keeping out of the Beta’s site, though. 

Allison had elbowed Seth in the stomach and said something about latent gay tendencies that made Seth’s whole face go red and then they’d fought rather loudly until Wymack kicked them both out to deal with their shit. Neil didn’t think she should put up with him. She was obviously too good for the Beta.

Nicky whistles when he gets a look at Neil, freshly showered and in his new clothes. “Wow. If I wasn’t already mated, I’d be hitting all over that,” he says. Then he thinks about it. “Actually, I’m sure Erik wouldn’t mind. He’s a very giving individual.”

Before Neil can feel uncomfortable at the insinuation, Andrew turns on the Beta and grins. “Hey Nicky, shut up.” 

“But—”

“No. Absolutely not.”

Nicky switches to German to whine. “How come you get all the hotties? First Kevin, now Neil? Way to make a boy jealous.”

Aaron snorts in obvious disgust and Andrew’s expression echoes the sentiment. “Don’t make me stab you,” he warns. 

Neil watches as Nicky backs down. He’s not sure if Andrew means it, even if he definitely knows there are knives in those armbands he wears. Probably other knives on his person, too. Nicky seems to believe Andrew’s being serious if the slight smell of anxiety is anything to go by.

“Okay. Our plan is to get some rest tonight. Those of you going tomorrow can stay here since we’re shipping out so early. Abby’s gone to get the van, so we’ll be ready to move as soon as possible. Andrew, you make sure Kevin actually wakes up in time. I don’t have time to deal with him in the morning. Neil, try to get some rest. You look nice, but anyone with working eyes can see the exhaustion running through your frame. There’s only so much hair and makeup can do to cover that up.” 

Wymack talks like he’s used to being listened to. Neil wonders where a Beta gets so much confidence. The Foxes all nod and start packing up, those who aren’t staying, or heading upstairs for those who are. Neil notes that Renee, Matt and Dan head for the stairs. Nicky gets Andrew’s car keys and he and Aaron leave, Allison and a still fuming Seth behind them. Wymack goes back to his office, but Neil is unsure if he’ll stay the night or not. 

That leaves Neil, Andrew and Kevin standing around the lounge. It immediately becomes awkward. All of the awkwardness is coming from Kevin, who seems nervous now that there’s no one to perform in front of.

He rubs the back of his head and looks at Neil. “Listen—”

Neil immediately cuts him off. “Honestly, you can fuck off. I’m glad you finally showed me your true colors, but I really want nothing to do with you right now.”

Kevin looks wounded and like he wants to argue, but Neil doesn’t have time for him. He turns and goes upstairs, bypassing his room for the roof access door. It’s unsurprising when Andrew follows him out a few minutes later.

“Are you going to try to convince me that Kevin actually isn’t a bad guy?” he asks. His feet are hanging over the edge of the roof as he watches the stars slowly start to come out of hiding.

Andrew snorts. “Kevin is a coward who’s terrified of his own shadow. There’s nothing remotely good about him.”

Neil slants him a look. “And yet you have a deal with him. So he has _something_ you want.”

“I want nothing,” Andrew says flatly. His face is completely blank when he says it, but something slowly twitches its way back on. “I wanted nothing. When I first met Kevin. He had nothing of interest to offer me.”

“Not money? Not a position at one of the many companies Kayleigh Day owned?”

Andrew gives him that look like he’s being a moron again. “I don’t need that, and I wouldn’t accept it even if he did offer.” He takes his packet of cigarettes from his pocket but doesn’t actually get one out. “He offered me something else. At the time, I thought I should accept.”

“At the time?”

“It’s not your turn for a question,” Andrew says. He finally lights a cigarette and doesn’t offer Neil one. “Why did you let Kevin bully you into going tomorrow?”

Ah. Andrew didn’t speak French, but he knew the gist of what Kevin was threatening him with, clearly. Neil fiddles with the sleeves of his new, bright orange jacket. “I thought maybe it was important to help, even if I won’t be here long.”

Andrew slants him a look. “Planning on going somewhere?”

Neil rolls his eyes. “You clearly don’t know Riko, if you think he’ll let me stay here long. I’m surprised he hasn’t come already.”

“I made you a deal. I keep you safe, you stay here. Did you forget?”

His tone more than his words makes Neil stop and study Andrew. He really, truly and honestly thought he could keep Neil safe. From Riko, from the rest of the big bad world. Even without knowing what else hunted Neil from the shadows. Neil doesn’t know if Andrew is truly that self-confident or just stupid. He might have kept Kevin “safe” from Riko, but Riko hadn’t been all that focused on getting Kevin back in the year he’d been gone, not really.

“I didn’t forget,” Neil says slowly. “But I think you’re underestimating Riko.” 

“I think you’re probably overestimating him.” 

He can say that because Andrew doesn’t know Riko, not really. Not even Kevin knows Riko the way Neil does. They’re both Alphas, they don’t understand Riko’s complete ownership over Neil, the legal right the Alpha had to him. 

Neil hums and reaches over to take Andrew’s cigarette. It’s almost done, so Neil takes the last pull off of it and then ashes it against the roof. He flicks it over the edge the way he’s seen Andrew do it multiple times, now, but he doubts if he can get it to land in the same spot. Not enough practice. 

Andrew watches him do it, but doesn’t move to retaliate in any way. It’s something Neil has noticed over a day of careful watching. Andrew doesn’t move to do anything the way a normal Alpha would, not unless one of his own are in danger; danger which can mean anything from a fight with Seth to an overly-nosy client of the Court’s. Andrew is diligent the way he watches over his Monsters—something Neil had heard Dan calling them but couldn’t figure out why—and he’s quick to act if he has to, but small grievances like Neil stealing his smoke don’t seem to faze him.

“Can I ask my question, now?”

“You can do whatever you want.” Andrew crosses his arms behind his head and lies down on them, looking up into the sky.

Neil watches Andrew for a while, then moves his gaze back up to the stars. “Can you stay out here with me for a little while?” It’s not the question he’s most curious to ask, more a request than anything else.

Andrew makes an affirmative noise and doesn’t move to go back inside.

-

It feels like no time at all before Neil is back downstairs and dressed to go. He’s dizzy from sleepiness but at least he isn’t half-comatose like Kevin. Renee looks perfectly fine and Matt and Dan are leaning against one another. Andrew just looks distinctly annoyed. Wymack is talking to someone on his cellphone and Neil isn’t sure if the Beta stayed the night or not. He looks the same level of stressed as usual, though. Abby is checking her bag for snacks and supplies.

“Why do we have to get up so early?” Dan whines, leaning more of her weight on Matt. “The sun’s not even up yet.”

“Well, that’s the thing about morning shows,” Wymack says as he ends his call. “They tend to happen in the morning.”

“Not _this_ early.”

“They are when you have to drive as far as we do to get there.”

Dan continues grumbling about overnight hotel rooms but she closes her eyes and seemingly pretends to go back to sleep. 

Wymack claps his hands and grins when most of them grimace at the loud noise. “Do you have all your things ready? Yes? Good. Let’s go.”

They somehow manage to get themselves packed into the people carrier Abby rented for the occasion. She’s up front with Wymack, Dan and Matt in the first row of seats. Renee gets in the middle and when Andrew looks at him, Kevin sits down next to her. Neil and Andrew take the back row. He would think Andrew is trying to placate him in some way, but Andrew puts his head against the window and seemingly falls asleep before the van is even started.

It’s a long trip, one Neil isn’t really prepared for. He tries his hardest not to think of the last time he was put in a car for a long trip. Neil has no clue what smell he’s putting off, fear or desperation, but it’s evidently enough to make Renee turn around and smile serenely at him.

“I’m sure this is a very new experience for you, but you don’t have to worry that much. We’re all here to support you and Kevin. You’ll do fine.” There’s no hint of the thing living under her skin, but that’s not really a comfort. 

“I still don’t think it’s a good idea for me to be up there with him,” he says weakly. 

Kevin turns his head. “Well, tough. I already told Kathy you’d be on with me and she’s delighted.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Andrew mumbles, head still turned away and pressed against the window. 

All three of them quiet down and Neil tries to reign his panic in for the last hour of the trip.

“Someone wake the monster up!” Wymack calls out when they pull up to the studio security gate. 

“I’m already up you loud fuck,” Andrew says. He sits up and all the hair on the left side of his face is pressed flat while the right side is still tufted up. He shifts his gaze between Neil and Kevin and then looks back out the window when reassured they’re both relatively fine.

They get past security and park the van in the designated spot. As they’re unloading themselves, a peppy woman in very high heels comes striding towards them, unnaturally white teeth already glinting in the very little sunlight.

“Kevin Day! While I live and breathe!” She sweeps Kevin into a hug and Neil is amazed by the Alpha’s instant transformation.

“Kathy, what a pleasure, as always.” He smiles in a way Neil has never seen. Media training, probably. “It’s been far too long.”

Kathy’s grin turns fox-sly. Neil inhales suddenly and realizes that under her perfume, the scent of Alpha lingers around her. “About a year, wasn’t it? I’ve just been in mourning since you and Riko split up.” 

_Split up_? What the hell did _that_ mean?

Kevin affects a wounded look. “Well, you know how it goes.” He cheers up and reaches out to grab Neil, pulling him in with a grip that’s far too tight. “I wanted to introduce you to Neil—”

“Josten,” Neil blurts out, drawing both of their predatory gazes. “Neil Josten. Nice to meet you.”

Kevin’s grip tightens and he asks in French, “where did that come from?” 

“It was going to be my next identity, before you showed up,” Neil says with a smile as fake as Kevin’s. 

Kathy’s eyes skate between them and a delighted look overtakes the sly one. “My my, Kevin. You didn’t tell me you were so _close_ with our dear Omega.” Her gaze settles on the square bandage Abby had put on his cheek before they left and she looks contemplative.

“Not close, exactly,” Kevin says quickly. “But you know how it goes. Instincts and all that.”

“Hm.” Kathy looks between them again before grinning and gesturing at a Beta standing behind her with a clipboard. “Well! We’ve got to get you both into hair and makeup.” She starts walking away and Kevin drags Neil behind after her. 

Neil looks back at the rest of their group, but they’re being led away by another clipboard-wielding Beta. Neil tries not to let the feeling of his stomach dropping affect him.

“Our plan is to have you on first, Kevin. We can talk about how you’ve been out of the public eye for so long, what you’re doing now. Then we’ll bring Neil on, talk to both of you about the Foundation. Does that sound good?” Kathy asks it like a question, but Neil has no doubt that it’s not one.

“Of course,” Kevin says. “I defer always to your superior media knowledge.”

Kathy eyes him and then breaks out into a huge smile. “Always a charmer, this one,” she says to Neil. “Better watch out for him.” She looks at Kevin’s hand on his wrist. “Or maybe not.” She waves a hand at the Beta again. “This is Oliver, he’ll look after you. I have to go out and get the audience warmed up. I’ll see you in a minute!”

Oliver looks like he’s used to his boss by now and he leads them both to a room where several people are waiting. They’re given matching outfits to wear—which Neil refuses to change into around anyone else, cooperation be damned—and Kevin is the first to be seen by the woman holding a makeup brush. 

“Oh, there’s never much we have to do to this pretty face,” she says happily. 

Neil watches Kevin charm and flirt with her while she puts on his makeup and then runs her fingers through his hair, styling it into artful tufts. She blushes and flirts back just as much. Neil has never seen Kevin act like this, especially not with Thea. He thinks Thea would punch him in the mouth if he tried it.

“Mr. Day, you’re needed on stage in just a few seconds, if you’ll come with me,” Oliver says after talking into his headset. “Neil, you’re on standby.”

Kevin walks out with his back straight and head up even though Neil knows he had to drink from a bottle of vodka before they got to the studio just to control his shaking. It’s an impressive difference.

There are hands pulling him into the makeup chair and he stares up at the Beta woman with wide eyes.

“You poor thing,” she says sadly. Her fingers are already tracing the bruises on his face. “Someone wasn’t very kind to you, were they?” They touch the edge of his bandage and he clenches his hands around the armrests. “Would you like to keep this on?”

“Yes, please,” he says softly.

She clucks at him and goes about making his bruises disappear with her makeup. It’s actually astounding, watching the process. Neil didn’t know people could do something like that with just a little powder. She runs her fingers through his hair as well, but mostly just to toy with it. Allison showed him how to style it the previous night, so it’s still mostly alright.

“Good luck out there, chick,” she says and shoos him out of his chair.

Oliver is waiting at the door and pulls him to the edge of the stage. “We’ll let you know when it’s your turn, so just stay here for now, alright?”

Neil nods and watches Kevin on the stage. He’s smiling and looking confident. It’s bizarre. 

The Alpha has already been introduced, but it takes the crowd a while to calm down. Kathy’s eyes shine while she takes them in, clapping slowly and obviously enjoying the surprise and delight coming from the audience.

“Wow!” she says after the cheers have quieted. “Look at that reaction. Kevin Day, you are still _just_ as popular as you’ve always been, huh?”

Kevin smiles and takes a sip from the coffee mug on his side of her desk. His smile makes him look rakish. “I’m glad to hear that, Kathy. I was sure everyone would have forgotten about me by now.”

“Forgotten! Kayleigh Day’s son? Member of the perfect court? How could anyone!” Kathy looks at the audience with a ‘come on’ face and grins when they start whistling and cheering again. “You hear that? No one’s forgotten _you_.” 

The look on Kevin’s face is supposed to be shy, Neil thinks, but he doesn’t wear it well. “Well, here I am,” Kevin says. “I’m glad the first person I’m talking to is you.”

Kathy waves at her cheeks like she’s blushing. “Oh! Do you hear that, everyone? Kevin Day is glad to talk to little old me!”

Several people in the audience wolf-whistle and there’s another polite round of applause. 

“But, down to some business, Kevin. I was thrilled when we were able to set up this meeting, of course, but also surprised. It’s been well over a year since any publication has heard from you. What have you been doing? After your accident, we were all so worried about you. Showing up in South Carolina out of nowhere, taking on the work of your mother’s foundation, that surprised us all.” 

Kevin nods and frowns. He clenches his left hand in the fabric of his pants, but Neil doesn’t think anyone can see it from the angle he’s sitting. “It was tough for me,” Kevin says slowly. “I’d always lived in the spotlight. It’s hard not to, when your mom is Kayleigh Day. But after the accident, I just wanted to be alone for a while.”

Kathy makes a moue of sadness. “Of course, Riko left the spotlight after your accident, too. We were all unsure what was going on. To hear that you’d left him and gone off on your own was such a shock.”

Hearing Riko’s name makes Kevin twitch, but it can’t be a surprise to him, not really. They’d discussed Riko being mentioned while they were in the van. Or, Kevin and Wymack had, anyways. 

“It was all just a little much,” Kevin admits. “I’d been so hurt and it was like a wakeup call. I realized I couldn’t keep living in my mother’s shadow, content to let her trust control everything she’d left me.” He looks at the audience and seems to see where the Foxes are seated because it makes him sit up straighter. “That’s why I’m here today.”

“Oh?” Kathy leans forward in her seat.

“Yes. I wanted to bring some awareness to a cause that was very dear to my mom’s heart. One that I’ve taken up over the last year.” He slowly unclenches his left hand. “As you all know, my mom created the Kayleigh Day Foundation in order to help those less fortunate than her.”

On the screen behind him, a picture of Kayleigh and child Kevin appears. There are several coos and soft noises from the audience. Neil takes in Kayleigh’s delighted smile and the way Kevin is looking up at her, devotion shining in his eyes. He wonders if there was ever a time he looked at his own mom that way. If any pictures of the two of them together even exist anymore.

“The Kayleigh Day Foundation has endowed several charities, since before mom’s death and after. I’ve taken over the reigns as the chairman of the board, because I want to make sure my mom’s vision keeps going.”

Surprisingly, Kevin sounds just as passionate as he did the previous night. Like this is something he _actually_ cares about. Neil is just as gripped as the rest of the audience seems to be over his words.

“My mom believed that everyone should have the right to basic things like healthcare, shelter, safety.” Kevin smiles. “She was from Ireland, so she didn’t understand why our system was set up the way it is.”

The audience chuckles and Kathy smiles and nods. “You were also born in Ireland, right? But you lived in Japan and England. You’re an American citizen, as far as I’m aware, correct?”

Kevin nods. “I am. But that’s not the important part of this story.” He pauses and waits for the laughter of the audience to die down. “Mom was a passionate advocate for equality no matter your presentation. She and David Wymack set up the Foxhole Court together to do just that.” 

The picture of Kayleigh and Kevin disappears from the screen to be replaced by a picture of Kayleigh and a huge pair of scissors cutting a red ribbon in front of the Foxhole Court. David is standing off to the side, looking amused and fond. Neil doesn’t recognize anyone else around them. Maybe clients, or other backers.

“When mom passed away, she made sure that the charities she supported would be taken care of until perpetuity. She made more money than even she could have ever spent.” Another pause for laughter and a fond smile from Kevin. “She wanted to do something to better the world. I wanted to make sure that her dream continues on with me.”

The audience roars with cheers and applause and Kathy smiles between them and him. She wipes a tear from her cheek and Neil is impressed she can make herself cry on command. She certainly doesn’t smell emotional enough for it to be real.

“That’s a really amazing thing, Kevin,” she says with a wide smile. “Isn’t that great, everyone?” The audience shouts, “yes” as one. “You mentioned the Foxhole Court. So that’s where you’ve been? Working with David Wymack and his charity? Why that specific one? I’m sure you could have your choice of any charity to partner with.”

Kevin nods. “Yes, but the Court was special to my mom. It was the only one she helped found. While I was trying to…find myself, I guess you could say, David was a really intrinsic key. I went to him and he told me a lot about my mom. It’s hard for me to really remember her, so it was important to me that I work with someone who really knew her, understood her vision. David showed me how important the work he does at the Court is, and I decided to stay in Palmetto and help him.”

There’s another round of applause and the screen shows a live shot of Wymack, looking slightly uncomfortable. He raises a hand to the camera and nods, smile tight. The screen changes to another picture of Kayleigh by herself, smiling into the camera.

Neil watches Kevin look at the picture, takes in the genuine sorrow and longing on his face. 

“Speaking of the important work you do,” Kathy says. “We have a special guest with us today, don’t we? I was delighted when you told us you would be bringing one of your clients with you to help explain why the Court is so important.” She stands up and turns to the side of the stage where Neil is standing. “Please join me in welcoming to the stage, Neil Josten, everyone!”

The sick feeling is tumbling around in his stomach as Oscar prods at him to go onto the stage. Neil tries his hardest to breathe and walk normally. He reaches out to shake Kathy’s hand and is shocked still by the hug she gives him. As the applause dies down, he takes the seat next to Kevin. 

“So, Neil,” Kathy says. She’s leaning on one arm and smiling beatifically at him. “You’re an Omega, correct?”

There are shocked gasps and murmurs from the audience and Neil makes himself not turn to look at them. “Yes,” he says. “I am.”

Kathy pulls a tragic expression. “If you’re working with the Foxhole Court, that means you’ve deal with some pretty harsh things, haven’t you?”

Neil opens his mouth and clicks it shut when Kevin’s hand grabs his arm between them, away from the prying eyes of the audience or the camera. He rethinks what he was about to say and then nods. “I. Yes. Things have been…hard, for me. I was hurt by my family and then by the Alpha who bought me. Until I was brought to the Foxhole Court, I thought things were pretty hopeless.”

They’d discussed what Neil would say to Kathy, to the whole world. Certainly not his real story, nothing that would implicate the Moriyamas in any way. That was too dangerous an enemy to make, especially the Main branch. 

Kathy waits for the audience’s hushed talking to die down. “I’m so sorry to hear that, Neil. But you’re doing okay now? Kevin is making sure you’re safe?”

Neil doesn’t look at Kevin at all when he nods. “Yes, everyone at the Foxhole Court has been great. They’ve helped me feel like a real person, like I really didn’t deserve the things that happened to me.” The lies feel hot and heavy in his mouth, tumbling over his tongue. Kevin keeps gripping tighter around his wrist and he’s sure he’ll have another ring of bruises there before they’re done. “Kevin’s been great.”

“Of course he has,” Kathy says. “You know what they say about Alphas and Omegas. I myself have the urge to bundle you up and make sure no one ever hurts you again.” The audience claps and she smiles demurely.

Neil really isn’t sure if she means it, but either way, he wants nothing to do with her. She’s almost as scary as Renee. He smiles at her when Kevin’s nails dig into his wrist. “Thank you, Ms. Ferdinand.”

The audience coos at him and Kathy fans her cheeks again. “Just listen to that,” she says. “So _polite_. I can understand why Kevin would be so invested in keeping you safe.” The sly fox smile is back on her face and she watches the audience for their reactions. She isn’t disappointed by the gasps and wild applause the implication brings. 

“Neil is just one person who needs our help,” Kevin says. “The Foxhole Court works with people of all distinctions. Alpha, Beta, or Omega. Abuse doesn’t stop at just one distinction, and as much as the views of the world are changing, Omegas like Neil are still in need of our help. There are still laws that allow the sale of Omega children, that allow marriages before they reach the age of majority. Omegas don’t have full rights over their children, can’t inherit property. It’s a shame, really.” 

Kathy covers her mouth in shock. “You don’t mean that, really?” she asks, even though Neil knows she has to know. It’s not like any of the laws on the books are secret. The audience is murmuring in horrified shock as well. “What can we do to help?”

“Charities like the Foxhole Court are always looking for donations of money or supplies, volunteers for things like tutoring, advocacy or medical personnel. The Kayleigh Day Foundation is the biggest contributor to the Court, but the more people David tries to help, the more help he needs in return. The Foxhole Court also acts in concert with the Trojan Warrior program in LA and the Siren House in Houston. All of us fund safe houses as well as homeless shelters and domestic abuse hotlines.”

“Jeremy Knox is the head of the Trojan Warrior program, isn’t he?” Kathy asks. A picture of Jeremy pops up on screen and Neil looks at it, curious. If Jeremy is in LA, that means Jean must be there with him. Jeremy is blond and tall and handsome, his smile just as wide as Kathy’s, but real.

Kevin nods. “He is. He’s a good friend of mine. His program works with schools to help kids from disadvantaged backgrounds find scholarships, tutoring and mental health resources. He’s really a great guy.”

Kathy smiles. “You’ve also got Allison Reynolds, heiress of the Reynolds Group, on your team, correct?” The screen turns to a picture of Allison, looking like she’s fresh off of a runway. She’s got huge sunglasses on and a handbag that’s half the size of her.

“Allison is a great colleague and a close friend,” Kevin says. Neil wonders if anyone else can smell the bullshit dripping from his mouth. “She leads our legal advocacy team and she works directly with David on our harder legal cases.”

“It’s amazing that you have such a team behind you,” Kathy tells them both. “You’re doing such wonderful work, and it’s impressive that you’ve been able to call so many people to the frontlines to get their hands dirty. I’m really impressed with you, Kevin Day. Not just another rich pretty boy, huh?” 

The audience roars and claps. Kevin smiles bashfully and ducks his head. His grip is still tight around Neil’s wrist, though. 

“I just want to thank you again for coming on our show,” Kathy says. She looks directly into the camera. “If you or a loved one needs help, you can contact the Foxhole Court or their affiliates by calling the number on your screens. If you’d like to donate to the cause, you can just click on the link on our homepage.” She smiles back at Kevin. “Kevin Day, ladies and gentlemen! We’ll see you after the break!”

The audience cheers again and Kevin stands up to hug Kathy. Neil stands as well, unsure what he should be doing. There are people with headsets and clip boards walking across the stage, adjusting Kathy’s desk and shuffling papers. 

Kathy reaches out to snag him for a hug too and Neil accepts it even though he feels stiff. They basically just used him as a tragedy prop, but he was prepared for that. What he’s not prepared for is Kathy holding on a little too long.

“Such a shame,” Kathy says as she pulls back, holding him at arm’s length. “I would love to get to know you better.” 

Neil shivers at the implication and steps back into Kevin’s side. “It was nice meeting you,” he says quickly.

“The pleasure was ours, as always,” Kevin picks up after him. “We’ll have to do this again, soon.”

Kathy grins and shoos them off the stage, someone behind the camera already counting down for the next segment.

Kevin drags Neil behind him, grip still far too tight for comfort. Neil tries to jerk away but he stops short when a familiar scent hits him. He goes stiff, can’t react when Kevin curses and stumbles away from him. It can’t be, no _nonono_.

“Hello, Nathaniel.”

It’s all the warning Neil has before he’s slammed up against a wall. There’s no one around, and they’re behind some curtains, so no one can see them. Neil tries not to panic, but it’s not working. All he can smell, all he can hear and feel and _taste_ is Riko. He whimpers when a kiss is pressed against the back of his neck.

“Look at you,” Riko says. He grabs Neil’s hair and tugs, making Neil’s head turn at an awkward angle. It lets him see Kevin standing a few feet away, face pale as a sheet and sweat already beading at his forehead. There goes the confident image he had.

Riko is using the bulk of his body to keep Neil pressed against the wall. It’s a familiar enough position that Neil can’t help but shake, mind tumbling over in panic. Riko touches the edge of his bandage, then moves so his whole hand is cradling Neil’s throat.

“What happened to your collar?” he asks softly. He’s pressed so close, Neil can feel him all along the back of his body, it’s too much. “Why are you hiding your tattoo? You know I don’t like it when I can’t see what’s mine.”

Neil lets out a noise that’s half-sob, half pure terror. He’d known Riko was going to come after him, of course he had. But he didn’t _want_ it. He’d hoped, deep down inside, that maybe Riko would give him up, would forget about him. Obviously, that wouldn’t happen. Riko was always going to claim what was his.

The smell of hot, clean anger tells him when Andrew shows up.

“Riko. I thought I told you not to touch what’s mine.”

Riko backs up enough to turn and look at Andrew. A nasty look comes over his face and he snarls. “Minyard. Not enough you had to steal one of my possessions away, you decided to go for another?”

Andrew, when Neil looks over at him, is grinning. It’s a terrifying thing that makes Neil shudder. “If you don’t get your hands off of him, I’m going to break your fingers.”

His threat makes a few people step towards them, people Neil hadn’t even noticed because of the overwhelming scent of Riko. They’re Ravens, ones Neil is intimately familiar with. He makes another noise without thinking, struggles against Riko until the Alpha slams him harder against the wall.

“Be _still_ ,” he hisses. “Or I’ll give you to them first.”

Neil presses himself against the wall, panting from the sheer dread gripping him. It feels like his heart is beating a million miles an hour, like he’s not getting enough oxygen in. He’s dizzy from his shallow breaths.

“Do you think I’m afraid of your goons?” Andrew asks. Neil can hear the grin in his voice even if he can’t see it anymore. “How many of them do you think I’ll have to gut before someone hears and investigates?”

Riko curses and lets Neil go. When he steps away, Neil slides down the wall, legs unable to hold him up anymore. “You think you’ve won, Minyard, but this isn’t over. I’ll be back, for _both_ of them next time.” He takes a few echoing steps away from Neil, towards where his Ravens were. “I’ll make sure to put down any stray mutts, too,” he threatens.

Everything is silent for a while other than Neil’s loud panting. He’s holding onto the wall, too afraid to turn around and see he’s been abandoned to Riko, no matter his words. There’s no way Andrew defied him, no way Riko is gone.

He startles when a hand touches the back of his neck, grips tightly. Andrew’s smell washes over him, calm and soothing and no longer holding that hot edge of anger. “Neil,” he says quietly. “You need to calm down. Someone is going to come back here sooner or later. They can’t see you like this. It’ll raise too many questions.”

Andrew’s voice is soft and monotone and it’s exactly what Neil needs. He tries to take in a deep breath, but it rattles out of him. He panics when he can’t seem to get the next breath in.

“ _Neil_ ,” Andrew says again. “Listen to my breathing. Follow me.”

Neil doesn’t know how long he sits there, head pressed against the wall and ears picking up Andrew’s careful breathing. It helps, though. Eventually, everything evens out and Neil can breathe on his own again.

“Good. I’m going to help you up, and we’re going to get out of here, okay?”

Andrew doesn’t wait for Neil’s nod to haul him up, catching him when he stumbles. His muscles feel loose, like they aren’t connected properly. The adrenaline washing away leaves him exhausted. Neil catches a glance at Kevin, huddled in Abby’s arms like he’s a kid. The others are around Wymack, looking at him with worry clear on their faces. Neil looks down, ashamed to have them seeing him like this. He didn’t even notice their smells joining them backstage. 

“Stop that,” Andrew says softly, pulling him closer into his side.

Neil bites his lip and lets Andrew lead him outside, back to the van. They crawl into the backseat and Neil curls into the side as much as he can. There’s a clear foot of space between him and Andrew. He can hear the others getting into the van, murmuring to each other quietly. The whole van reeks of fear, but Neil isn’t sure if it’s from him or Kevin. The smell of vodka very quickly follows.

“Sleep,” Andrew says under his breath once they’re on their way back to Palmetto. He says it quiet enough that Neil doesn’t think anyone else can pick up on it. “I’ll make sure no one touches you. Rest.”

They’re both silent for a long time. Neil slowly reaches out one hand, not daring to look away from the door he’s pressed against. He’s startled when Andrew’s fingers touch his, but not enough that he lets go.

Neil presses himself closer to the door, squeezes his eyes shut so he can’t see anything. He keeps his grip on Andrew’s hand light, though, afraid Andrew will let go if he’s too clingy.

He’s not aware enough to be surprised when he falls into a deep sleep sometime during their ride home.


	7. Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some actions have consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, i'm really sorry this took a full week to come out. i'm on new medication and it took a while to sort of even me out. writing this chapter was honestly like pulling teeth. i'm really hoping to get my schedule right again, so you don't have to wait so long for updates. i really can't guarantee it, but i'm hopeful. i also would like to have this fic done before i have to go back to work/school in the next few weeks. so we'll see.
> 
> chapter warnings/spoilers: canonical character death, implication/discussion of past rape/gang rape, discussion of forced bonding

Andrew doesn’t stop himself from watching Neil sleep on the drive back to Palmetto. He probably should—it wasn’t like anyone in the van would harm him, not with their soft bleeding hearts. Renee would really be the only one who could do real damage, but Andrew knows she won’t.

She looks over the seat back at him and catches his eye. She’d been rubbing Kevin’s back and saying comforting words to the frightened Alpha, soothing him like a child. Kevin was either drunk enough or calm enough to have slipped into his own troubled sleep.

The thing that lives beneath Renee’s skin had been awake and watching quietly, curiously. It wanted to know if it needed to stay awake, needed to come out to play. Andrew grins at it and shakes his head once. He doesn’t need Renee to get her hands dirty, not for this. Not right now, anyways. He’s more than enough to take care of some sick Alpha that needed to be put down.

Renee turns back around and rubs Kevin’s back when he shifts.

That means Andrew is free to look back at his own sleeping charge. Neil’s face doesn’t look younger or untroubled while he’s asleep. There’s a pinched expression on him that speaks of worry present even now. Like he can’t stop himself from being on the lookout. 

His hand twitches against Andrews and he lets out a soft whine, one that has the Alphas in the car tensing up. Andrew ignores them, squeezes Neil’s hand until he relaxes again. The tension in the car levels out.

Andrew can admit to himself that he’s not quite sure why he’s…invested in Neil. It can’t be the Omega thing—Andrew has met other Omegas before and they’ve never interested him much. Plus, his hormones and brain chemistry are too beyond fucked up to work the way a normal Alpha would around an Omega. 

He’d been in the audience when Neil came out, smelled the focus and interest from the people around him. It was sick the way they cared only about Neil’s tragedy, not about _him_. They cared because Kevin and Kathy told them they should care, but Andrew had the feeling they would have been content just listening to stories of Neil’s abuse.

That alone had made him twitchy and unhappy in his seat. He was surrounded by people he didn’t know, smelling way too much. Renee had tried her best to keep him focused, but it was genuinely too much. Luck let him slip away when the audience stood up to give Kevin a standing ovation.

There hadn’t been any clue that Andrew was needed, nothing to really draw him back stage. He wasn’t overly suspicious a confrontation would occur. Something had driven him back there, though, in time to be hit by a wave of pure terror. He stumbled into a wall and would have fallen if his body hadn’t known it needed to _move_. 

Riko had Neil pinned to the wall, was saying something to him that had the Omega stinking of despair. Kevin had been standing off to the side, pale-faced and utterly useless. Andrew was aware there were others around them, but he couldn’t focus on anything other than Riko with his hands on Neil.

He would have killed Riko. Had no one else been around, he would have done it quite happily, regardless of the consequences. Nothing he’d learned about the Alpha led him to believe it would be beneficial to keep him alive. Sure, there would be repercussions, but Andrew could deal with those. He always had.

The sight of Riko pressed against Neil alone was enough to convince Andrew to kill him. His anger exploded out of him, clean and bright, not that Riko or Kevin could smell it. He saw Neil’s shoulders drop.

Things after that weren’t a blur. Andrew could recall them perfectly. Riko’s goons, his threats, the rest of the Scooby Gang showing up. Abby cradled Kevin to her like she’d actually borne him. Dan had made a move towards Neil, slumped against the wall and still in a world of his own, but Andrew’s snarl made her back off.

He’d said Neil’s name but gotten no response. As much as he balked to touch someone without their permission, Andrew knew Neil was gone somewhere his voice alone couldn’t reach him. 

Andrew had held Neil’s neck, brought him back, pushed him into the back of the van, and now they were here. With Andrew’s hand curled around Neil’s, scars and callouses neatly lining up. The tentative touch against his hand had been question and permission enough for Andrew to grab on, but he wasn’t exactly sure why he held on. There was no logical reason, which meant it had to be emotional or instinctual. 

There was no emotional reason to hold onto Neil. He didn’t know the Omega beyond a few days and too many confrontations with power-mad Alphas. They had a deal, but that didn’t mean Neil was one of his, not really. There was no familial bond that no one would say Andrew cared about. He didn’t care about family, other than the fact that he’d made a promise with some of it. 

So, it must have been instinctual. Andrew hated being out of control, being forced to listen to his body over his mind. It’d been that way for so long on his medication, or when those men had forced him to participate in things his mind had been screaming at. He should hate Neil now for making him do things that went counter to his own rules.

And he did, to some extent. He hated Neil. Hated the complications he brought, for Kevin and himself. Hated that he’d been weak and broken and had given up. Hated that there were so many parts of himself he could see in Neil. 

But there was something else inside himself that he didn’t really want to examine. 

It might be that he found Neil physically attractive—he was slender and soft and would be easy to hold down, if Andrew wanted. Not that that sort of behavior got him off; he just needed to know he could overpower whoever he was with in order to feel safe enough to engage in anything sexual. He had a feeling Neil would know how to listen and would respect his boundaries.

Not that they would ever get that far. Andrew fully expected Neil to run as soon as he had feet on solid ground again. Neil seemed like a runner. There was an air about him. He was like a rabbit ready to bolt and abandon the warren at the first sign of danger. That he hadn’t over night after Kevin’s confrontation was a miracle; there was no way he’d stay after facing Riko’s wrath again.

Andrew didn’t want him to stay. He didn’t _want_ anything. Neil was more trouble than he was worth, but Andrew had the feeling he would maybe regret it if the Omega ran off somewhere else. Someone else could take care of him a lot better than Andrew and his lot, but Neil should still stay.

“We’re here,” Wymack announces to the van at large. 

That’s a surprise—Andrew hadn’t thought they’d been moving for that long. Wymack must have broken all the speeding laws between Raleigh and Palmetto to get back so soon. Renee is gently pulling Kevin out of his drunken stupor, not bothering to get him all the way awake before helping him out of the van behind Dan and Matt. Abby is there to hover and take over for Renee as soon as they’re out. Andrew can see Dan waiting and watching him with narrowed eyes.

“I can grab him,” Matt says from behind Dan. “So you don’t have to wake him.”

Andrew doesn’t need to growl to make the Beta back off. “Go away.”

“We have every right to be worried! Riko—” 

“Fuck off, Wilds. We don’t have a problem right now, but we will if you keep pushing.” 

Dan glares at him but lets Matt pull her away back into the Court. It leaves Andrew and Neil in the van. He notices Wymack standing in the doorway to the building, looking at him oddly. Andrew ignores him.

“Neil. Wake up.” He doesn’t touch the Omega other than to squeeze his hand again. It’s enough to jolt him awake. Seemingly instinctively, Neil lashes out, fist catching Andrew along the chin. It’s not hard enough to hurt, but he should have been on the look-out for it. His own reactions to waking up suddenly are violent enough.

Neil’s eyes are wild as he looks around, fear-stink taking up the van. He settles on Andrew and strangely relaxes. “Andrew?”

“We’re back.”

They don’t touch as they get out of the van. Neil still seems shaken, either from his abrupt awakening or Riko’s confrontation. Probably both. He’s quiet as they go back into the Court. It’s closed for the day since Wymack and Dan would both be gone, so no one is there other than the gathered Foxes.

“Neil! Are you okay?” Nicky looks and smells anxious as he jumps up from his seat on the couch. He twists his hands in his shirt even though it’s obvious he wants to hug Neil and check him over.

Andrew smells concern from everyone other than Kevin, who’s radiating terror from the couch. He deposits Neil into his chair away from the others and sits on the arm of the couch next to Kevin, a silent presence.

“What the fuck was that!” Dan is obviously at her limit for keeping quiet. “Why the fuck was Riko Moriyama there?”

No one had told her the circumstances surrounding Neil’s appearance. Interesting.

Allison sits up in her seat. “Riko Moriyama? No way. Really? Is _that_ who collared Neil?”

They all knew why Kevin was really with them, what Riko did to his hand to drive him to seek shelter. None of them were under any illusions that Riko or the rest of the Moriyama clan were good people. If anyone knew the extent of how bad they were, it would probably be Allison. Their families ran in the same circles.

Neil flinches at the reminder. 

“So now Riko has another reason to make our lives miserable?” Seth asks everyone at large. He glares at Kevin and Neil both. 

“You said you were hurt by your family, that an Alpha bought you. Was that Riko?” Dan asks softly, completely ignoring Seth’s furious scowl. 

When Neil is silent, Kevin speaks up. “Neil’s family and Riko’s family are…business associates, I guess you could say.” There’s something he’s _not_ saying, Andrew knows for a fact, but he doesn’t push, not in front of everyone else. “Neil was contracted to be Riko’s once he was typed and presented. Certain circumstances led to that not occurring until Neil was fifteen. That’s when he came to live with us at the Nest.”

It’s a heavily edited history, even from just the sparse details that Andrew has from Neil and Kevin. At least he isn’t spilling Neil’s secrets to everyone. 

“I’m surprised a second son would get an Omega,” Allison says offhand. “You don’t see that in families like the Moriyamas. Ichirou would be the son who’s supposed to continue the line. Why give him to Riko?”

Kevin shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s not like I was privy to all the inner workings of the Moriyama family. I don’t know if there were negotiations between the Branch and Main families. I don’t know why Neil went to Riko instead.” 

Neil huddles in on himself in his seat and the smell coming off him is pure misery. Renee shifts but doesn’t go to him. She knows better, even though Andrew can guess at her desire to comfort a grieving Omega. 

“That just means having him here is an even worse idea,” Seth says. He sounds bitter. “I say we send him packing, somewhere far away from here.”

“Shut up, Seth. If anyone’s getting sent away, it’ll be _you_ ,” Nicky says with a sneer. He’s obviously latched onto caring about Neil, far more than he ever has or will for the other Beta. 

Seth growls. “What? It’s not bad enough that we’ve got Riko’s broken brother, now we’ve got his used goods?”

“Seth!”

“That’s enough.” Wymack’s eyes are narrowed. He’s been silent up to now, but he doesn’t take kindly to words like Seth’s. “You know we don’t say shit like that here. I think you need to go clear your head outside for a while.”

“Are you serious? You can’t think it’s a smart idea to keep both of them here. Not with Riko breathing down our necks!”

“He should stay here,” Neil says dully, stopping all conversation.

Seth glares. “I don’t need you sticking up for me, Omega.”

Neil looks towards him only long enough to show how much he doesn’t care about him. “No one should leave. It’s not safe. Riko will retaliate, since he couldn’t get me or Kevin back today. If you leave, there’s a good chance something bad will happen.”

That makes Seth scoff and stand up. “He’s an asshole, but what’s the worst he could do?”

It’s a stupid question from an even stupider man. Andrew knows Seth self-involved, but Seth knows what the Moriyamas are. He can’t be oblivious to the truth of what Riko could do to any of them if he so wished. The fact that Riko hasn’t done anything to them since Kevin came to the Court is odd enough. 

“The lesser son of the yakuza is still the yakuza,” Neil tells them all. “He has more to prove and he’s vicious when he’s backed into a corner. Like a rabid dog.”

“You all can go fuck yourselves,” Seth says. “I’m not going to let some spoiled Alpha rule my life. I’m out.” He stomps his way to the front door, giving them the middle finger before he leaves.

Allison has been quiet during his whole diatribe. She stands up now and looks around at them. “He’s an idiot, but that doesn’t mean he’s wrong. We can’t live the way our clients do, watching over our backs and jumping at shadows just because a rich Alpha is pissed off at us.”

She should know better, Andrew thinks. She used to run in Riko’s circles, or at least the more legitimate circles Riko might have run in. But she’s more attached to Seth than she lets on, even when they break up and get back together what seems like every other day. 

“Allison, I really don’t think—” Dan starts.

“We’ll be back later.” Allison leaves to follow Seth. 

Andrew sits back and observes everyone’s reactions to their leaving. Dan looks unsettled and leans into Matt further for comfort. The Beta is grim-faced when he puts his arm around her. Renee is still looking at the door, concerned. Aaron doesn’t give a shit and neither does Nicky. Kevin couldn’t look past his own nose at anyone else even if he was forced. Wymack and Abby leave for his office, whispering together. That leaves their resident Omega.

Neil doesn’t seem bothered by Allison and Seth leaving. He’d given his warning and that was probably enough, as far as he was concerned. He’s looking at his knees, but his gaze lifts when he feels Andrew staring. 

“If we’re going to be camping out here for a while, we need to go grab some stuff from the dorms,” Nicky says. “Renee, if you want to come with, you can get things for Dan and Matt. Does that sound okay?”

Andrew breaks his staring contest with Neil to look at Kevin, gauging his reaction. The Alpha is finicky about having his stuff touched by anyone else, but he’s nodding and looking thoughtful.

They decide that Nicky, Kevin, Andrew and Renee will go back to the campus dorms to get things for the rest of the Foxes. Aaron doesn’t have any interest in going, and while that grates at Andrew, he’s not going to say anything to his twin.

Kevin stops next to Neil’s chair. His hand hovers, like he wants to touch Neil’s shoulder, but he wisely keeps it to himself. “We’ll be back soon,” he says softly.

Neil’s shoulders hunch up. “Like I care.”

Andrew snorts, amused at their little display despite himself, and they head out.

-

“Do you think he’s right?” Renee asks softly as she goes through Dan’s drawers. There’s an open duffle at her feet that already has her own things in it. They’ll be moving on to Matt and Seth’s room after this to get things for Matt.

Andrew shrugs and leans against the wall. “I don’t know. Riko has never retaliated against us in all the time we’ve had Kevin. Why start now?”

Renee frowns, hands pausing in her search for proper undergarments. “We’ve never had something he wants this badly,” she says lowly. “We know he wants Kevin back, but Kevin is a status symbol, I think. Neil is.” She pauses. “He’s something different.” 

There’s a heavy silence between them. Renee sighs and sits down on the bed closest to the door. Their room is set up like Andrew and Kevin’s, with Allison on the other side of the dorm. She fiddles with the cross at her neck.

“My gang mostly ran drugs, you know that,” she says. The thing beneath her skin stretches as it wakes up and takes over. “But we dealt in other things. Human trafficking is easy when you get them hooked on drugs and too far gone to think of the danger. We mostly took Betas, since there wasn’t really a trade for Alphas. But we got our hands on an Omega or two.” She looks at Andrew and the darkness in her eyes is palpable. 

“They’re easy to convince you need help when you’re a child who looks as desperate as we did. Easier to trick into going places they should have known better than to go. Omegas go for a lot, they brought in a lot of money to the gang, but we were only ever able to get a few. They were hoarded so carefully by whoever had them, their families or their Alphas. Everyone knew their value and no one wanted to give one up without a price.”

She gets up and goes back to the dresser, finishing with her packing. “I think Riko knows that desperation. He could give up on Kevin, even if he didn’t truly want to, but an Omega he claimed? I doubt it.”

Andrew watches as Renee shakes the darkness off and it goes back to sleep, becoming mild-mannered again. “I don’t think he’s been claimed. Not formally.”

Renee’s gaze is sharp when she looks at him. “No?”

“I don’t know why.” He shrugs. “When I took his collar off, I didn’t see a claim mark. I don’t know if maybe it was done somewhere else, but knowing Riko, I don’t think so. He’d want to proudly display it, wouldn’t he? The collar was just a show.”

“All the more reason to get him back before someone else does claim him, then.”

They’re quiet as Renee finishes up in their dorm and then moves on to Matt’s. Kevin is waiting impatiently in the hallway for them, tapping his foot, arms crossed over his chest. He glares at Andrew when they emerge from Matt’s room.

“What took you so long? We’ve been done ages.”

Nicky pokes his head out of their dorm when he hears talking. “Oh, are we ready to go? Awesome.” His bag clinks suspiciously when he exits their dorm. 

Andrew ignores everyone as they head back down the stairs and to his car. Kevin should learn to wait more often; no one else cares to live on his schedule.

The ride back is uneventful, Nicky and Renee chatting in the back quietly under the soft music from the radio. Kevin looks like he wants to bitch Andrew out some more, but he must realize that Andrew doesn’t give a single shit. 

They head back inside and Andrew immediately looks for his brother, finds him safe in his seat with his phone glued to his fingers as always. He looks up when Nicky calls out his name, but doesn’t give Andrew a second glance. 

Then, without thinking of the reason why, he seeks out Neil.

Matt and Dan have coaxed him into the kitchen area. Matt is the more domestic of the two, not that he seems to mind. Dan is sitting on the counter, heels kicking against the cabinet below while Matt leans against her and mixes something in a bowl.

Neil doesn’t look or smell concerned in any way. He’s just sitting on a stool at the island, watching them chat and cook. There’s already a plate of cookies in front of him and Andrew snatches one as he slides in next to him. Neil glances his way and unwinds a little in his seat, but doesn’t say anything.

“Neil’s never made cookies,” Matt says easily as he finishes with his bowl and then turns to the stove where several cookie sheets are waiting. “Are you sure you don’t want to roll them? It’s pretty fun.”

The Omega’s silence is answer enough and Matt hums as he scoops out and shapes the cookie dough to go on the sheets. Dan eyes Andrew with obvious distrust as he makes his way through several more cookies off the plate Neil wasn’t even touching.

“I don’t really like sweets,” Neil murmurs, more to Andrew than to the other two, but doesn’t seem to mind when they hear him.

“Really? We could make you something else. Matt does a mean spaghetti,” Dan says, concern overriding her suspicion of Andrew.

“I’m fine.”

Andrew rolls his eyes and slides the plate away from Neil. They’re good cookies, chocolatey and buttery just like he likes. Seems like Matt isn’t as useless as he first thought. “Trying to butter him up?” he asks around a cookie, grinning when Dan wrinkles her nose in disgust. “Isn’t that more Abby’s thing?”

They all notice how Neil goes stiff at her name. 

“Abby’s talking to Wymack, and we didn’t have anything else to do,” Matt says easily. He finishes with the dough and then puts the trays in the oven, setting a timer before he goes to wash his hands off. He smiles at Neil once he’s done. “How about I make grilled cheese sandwiches? That’s always a classic.”

Neil shrugs. “If that’s what you want.”

“Would you like one, Andrew?”

“Pass.” Andrew is fine with the cookies, especially if the second batch is macadamia nut like his nose suspects. 

Matt hums and moves to get the things he needs. He works effortlessly in the kitchen, content and easy in his motions. Andrew remembers when he was just as tightly wound as Neil, strung out and twitching at every sound.

“I came here when Wymack found me and Renee, offered us scholarships,” Dan says, seemingly from nowhere. From Neil’s nod, Andrew suspects Dan was telling him her sob story before they arrived. “I’d been saving up from work, of course, but I didn’t know if I’d be able to go to college on what I had. Wymack was like a godsend.”

She doesn’t go in for the religion thing like Renee, Andrew knows. Wymack is more a father figure to her than a biblical one. The way she’s always following him around, hanging off his every word. 

“I’m going to take over for him once he retires,” she says. “There’s nowhere else I can see myself. The Foxhole Court is my home. We’ve even helped a few of my sisters when they were in a bind.” She grins. “Plus, Matt’s here. Don’t know what he’d do without me.”

Matt smiles at her and leans over to give her a kiss that has Andrew fake-gagging. “Says the woman who wouldn’t give me the time of day when I first got here.”

Dan laughs and looks fond. “Well, you were pretty useless, back then.”

Neither of them looks at Andrew, acknowledges that he was the one who changed things for Matt, for both of them. Without him, his methods, Matt would still be the junkie he was when Wymack first picked him up from rehab and offered him a place at the Court.

There’s no bad blood between Matt and Andrew, not like there is with him and Dan. She blames him for doing something dangerous, that could have gotten the Beta killed, but Andrew had no other choice. He either had to get Matt clean by force, or take Aaron away. His brother’s tenuous grip on sobriety couldn’t be put at risk by a Beta with shaky foundations.

That he had Matt’s Alpha mother’s permission didn’t mean much to Dan. She still hadn’t forgiven him. Not that Andrew really cares. She might be Wymack’s second in command, but Dan doesn’t matter to him very much.

Now they’re happily bonded and mated and whatever other drivel they wanted to spout about being soulmates. Andrew doesn’t know if he’s to blame for that, too, but he really doesn’t care in the slightest. Their happiness doesn’t affect him whatsoever.

He looks over and notices Neil watching them carefully. There’s a look of confusion on his face, like he’s never seen two people together like Matt and Dan. Knowing his tragic life, he most likely hasn’t. 

Matt plates up food for the three of them and puts Neil’s in front of him. The Omega looks at it, then back up at Matt. There’s a look on his face that Andrew can’t place, something pathetically lonely.

“Thanks,” he says softly. 

The Beta grins, cheeks a bit flushed. “Any time, Neil,” he says happily. He goes back to Dan and leans against her as he eats his own food. Matt looks delighted and content again and Dan grins at him, ruffling his hair. They’re so sickeningly domestic.

Andrew gets tired of looking at them quickly. He gets up and snags the last cookie on the plate then heads to the roof. He doesn’t need to be surrounded by positive, hopeful people looking to fix someone. He knows better than most that sunshine words and baked goods can’t fix a damn thing. 

Unsurprisingly, Neil follows after him four cigarettes later.

“Done playing house with Mommy and Daddy?” Andrew drawls, exhaling a cloud of smoke. His stomach hurts from all the sugar and nicotine combined, but he ignores it. 

Neil sits down next to him, too close to the edge as usual. A visual metaphor for his life. “Which one is which?” 

Andrew hands him a cigarette and lights it when Neil holds it out. “Like I have to tell you.”

“Matt’s a far better mom than any I’ve known,” Neil says around his cigarette. Once it’s lit, he holds it close to his face and inhales in his weird little ritual. “Mom used to smoke, when she could. The smell reminds me of her.”

The truth is given without a question and Andrew frowns. That’s not how their game works. “Ask your question,” he says roughly.

Neil looks at him. The late-afternoon sun is glaring down on both of them, heating Andrew up in his all-black outfit and making Neil’s hair shine like burnished copper. It makes the fine details of his tattoo stand out, too; black and curling like a bruise.

“Did your mom make you cookies?” he asks.

“I don’t have a mom,” Andrew replies instantly.

“You and Aaron are test tube babies?”

Andrew rolls his eyes. “Don’t be smart.”

There’s an amused tilt to Neil’s mouth. “I’ve never been accused to that, before.”

“Aaron had a mother. She gave me up, so I don’t think she counts as mine.” He doesn’t mention Cass, doesn’t say that _she_ made him cookies when he was sore and still bleeding from his various hurts. 

“What happened to her?”

“It’s not your turn.”

Neil blinks and nods. “Okay.”

They’re both quiet as Andrew comes up with and discards several questions. He knows now that Neil will tell him the truth—he doesn’t seem to care if Andrew knows the deepest secrets of himself, has no sense of shame towards them, so Andrew has to be careful what he asks. He doesn’t know if he _wants_ Neil’s deepest secrets.

His curiosity gets the better of him, though. “You didn’t get along with yours?” he asks. He knows, already, that Neil’s mom is dead, that Moriyama men killed her and Kevin was involved in it somehow. But that tells him nothing of who she was.

Neil looks out over the parking lot. He tends to do that when he’s going to say something most people would think is horrific. “She took me from my father and from Riko, even though I didn’t know that at the time. She kept me safe.” He smiles and it’s not a nice one. “I don’t think she liked me very much, though. She loved me and thought it was her job to protect me, but I made her mad all the time. I couldn’t do the things she wanted, couldn’t be the son she needed. I fucked up a lot.”

He doesn’t have to say what happened when he fucked up. Andrew can guess. With the casual way Neil expects and accepts violence, with his confusion over gentleness and kindness, Andrew knows. He’d had foster families who dealt with mistakes with their hands or fists. 

“She was scared, I think,” Neil continues. “Scared that we would be found, that I would be taken. People react in strange ways when they’re scared.”

Andrew snorts. “You don’t need to excuse her behavior. An abuser is an abuser, no matter their reasoning.”

“What happened to Aaron’s mom?”

The question isn’t a surprise, but the shrewd way Neil is looking at him is. “She didn’t believe me when I told her there would be consequences for her actions.”

Neil tilts his head to the side. “She hurt Aaron.”

Andrew nods.

“You told her to stop, but she wouldn’t.”

“We’d made a deal. I would keep him safe. He wouldn’t be safe if she continued to be in his life.”

“You killed her to keep him safe.”

His words send a shock through Andrew’s body, even though they’re not a surprise to him. He knows what he did; he’s never shied away from the fact that he murdered Tilda, car accident or no. Aaron certainly looked at him like a murderer, even though _he_ was the one who asked Andrew for his protection. He should have known what that protection would cost.

“They call you a monster, but I don’t think they know what you are,” Neil says softly.

“Shut up.” Andrew grinds out his cigarette, snatches Neil’s away to do the same. He ignores the small smile on Neil’s face. “I hate you.”

It’s absolutely the truth.

-

The day passes slowly. Andrew manages to shake Neil off and spends some of the day at Kevin’s side, some of it in the rec room watching absolute nonsense with Nicky. He still finds himself up on the roof more often than not, with Neil appearing at his side frequently. A snarl doesn’t chase him off, nor do Andrew’s barbed words about being more useful somewhere else. Neil just stays quiet and beside him, staring out over the parking lot when Andrew refuses to share his smokes.

Night falls and most of the Foxes bed down for the night. Nicky is in the lounge calling Erik, but the rest of them are in the guest rooms on the second floor. Andrew is out on the roof after midnight has come and gone, unable to sleep in the Court when he feels so agitated.

Of course, Neil comes out before too long and sits down beside him. The dark marks under his eyes are still prominent, even though his bruises are fading. He clearly doesn’t feel comfortable enough to sleep here, either.

“Wymack or Abby will take you home if you really can’t sleep here,” Andrew spits out.

Neil looks over at him, then touches his face like he’s surprised anyone else can see the signs of his sleeplessness. “I’m fine,” he says automatically. “I don’t want to go with them.” He doesn’t say _I don’t want to go with Abby_ , even though Andrew is sure that’s what he means.

“You’re going to have to get over your feelings about her,” he says. “Wymack isn’t going to kick her out for you, and she’s here more than she’s not. Either accept it or leave.”

“Even though we have a deal?” Neil hides his smile in his knees and Andrew hates him for it.

“Deals can be broken.”

Neil turns away and looks at the streetlight closest to them. “Yeah. I know.”

He doesn’t know that Andrew doesn’t break deals, not by choice, but he doesn’t sound like he cares. Probably thinking about all of the promises and deals made to him that were broken over the years. Andrew grits his teeth. 

Andrew is getting ready to ask a question that will make him flinch, make him stop looking at Andrew like that, when the door to the roof crashes open, startling them both. Wymack is standing there, looking far too pale and grim. 

“Get down here. Seth is dead.”

Andrew doesn’t think he’s hearing things correctly until Neil shoots up to his feet and goes after Wymack quickly. Andrew follows, unable not to. The lights are on in the Court, everyone else already gathered in the lounge looking scared and outraged and numb. Andrew makes his way to Aaron and Kevin, doesn’t bother with Neil hovering at the edge of the group.

“What happened?”

Allison is sat next to Renee, face blank. Her hands are in her lap, palms up, fingers slightly curled. Renee has her arms around her, trying to comfort the other Alpha, but nothing seems to be getting through her dazed shock.

Wymack is holding a crying Abby, features set in stone. “Seth overdosed in the club they were in. Police were called in when he was found unconscious. Paramedics couldn’t revive him.”

Dan covers her mouth in shock and presses bodily against Matt. The Beta wraps her in his arms. Nicky looks sickly pale, glancing between Allison and Andrew. He’s the one who reaches out to the other Foxes the most, even though he usually ruins his own chances. He didn’t like Seth, doesn’t even particularly like Allison, but Andrew knows Nicky isn’t good with grief and tragedy.

Kevin and Aaron are both silent, but for different reasons. Aaron doesn’t give a shit about Seth, doesn’t care if he’s alive or not. Kevin’s hands are clenched in his lap and he looks at Andrew desperately. The stink of fear clings to him.

Andrew looks over at Neil and is unsurprised to see him standing still, just as blank as Allison.

“It wasn’t an overdose,” Allison finally says, voice scraped raw. “He didn’t have his meds with him when we went to the club. I checked.” They were in one of their on-again phases, anyway; Seth only mixed his anti-depressants and booze when they were broken up.

“There was something on him when I found him.” She reaches into her purse and takes out a slip of paper that reeks of vomit. Allison unfolds it so they can all read what it says in harsh black writing:

_Stray Mutt_

Neil inhales sharply and Allison’s eyes find his in a flash.

“You know what this means.” It’s not a question.

“Riko said he would put down any stray mutts that got in his way,” Kevin says weakly, answering when Neil can’t or won’t. “This was Riko.”

“Do you really think Riko would be so blatant?” Dan asks.

“I think Riko doesn’t care who knows what he’s done, as long as we get the message,” Kevin tells them.

“If he couldn’t get at me, Seth certainly was enough of a stray to go after,” Andrew says.

“Jesus Christ, Andrew.” Matt stands up. He smells like fury. He and Seth butted heads, but they were still roommates, and friends. They probably bonded over being Betas that probably should have been born Alphas or some shit.

“What?” Andrew asks. “Am I wrong?”

“Have some fucking tact,” Matt growls. Dan is glaring pure venom next to him.

“Cut it the fuck out,” Wymack barks out. He lets go of Abby and steps between them in case things get physical. “We don’t have time for bullshit like this right now. Matt, Dan, Renee, you go with Allison to Abby’s.” He turns and narrows his eyes at Andrew. “You and yours will stay here with me and Neil. Understood?”

Andrew holds his hands up and shrugs. “Fine by me, Boss.” He doesn’t care, as long as Wymack doesn’t try to split them up. That would be a mistake.

Matt is still glaring daggers at Andrew when Dan leads him away, Renee holding Allison behind them. Abby takes up the rear, dabbing at her face with a tissue. She looks as devastated as Allison should feel.

Wymack waits until they’re all gone to sigh and run his hand through his hair. “You really think Riko did this?” he asks dully.

“He doesn’t make idle threats,” Neil finally says. He turns on his heel and heads back upstairs for the roof before Wymack can question him any more.

“I’m way too sober for this,” Nicky announces. “I have drinks in mine if anyone wants to join.” Aaron gets up and follows him without a word.

Wymack doesn’t try to stop them, even though Aaron is still underage. He looks at Kevin, who’s stinking of fear still. “What do you want to do?” 

“Drink,” Kevin says flatly. He follows the cousins up the stairs, not even looking twice at Andrew as he goes.

It leaves Wymack and Andrew alone, which isn’t always the best idea. 

“Did you have to provoke them?” Wymack asks. He sounds weary and old. 

Andrew shrugs, taps his fingers against the armrest he’s sitting on. “I was just telling the truth. Seth and I aren’t the only strays that have to look out.” The whole bunch of them are, really. Unwanted and unloved except by each other, for the most part. If that doesn’t a stray make, he doesn’t know what would.

“Just stay away from them, alright? I’ll be closing the Court for a few days while we figure out what our next move is. Don’t say anything to Allison next time you see her. I won’t be responsible if she tries to kill you.”

They both know he isn’t exaggerating. Allison is aggressive and dangerous if pushed and Andrew doesn’t know how she reacts to grief.

“I’ll stay away from them as long as they stay away from me,” he agrees. It doesn’t make Wymack look any happier, but the Beta nods and waves him away, heading to his office to call people and drink the last of his scotch, no doubt.

Andrew makes his way back up to the roof. It feels like he’s been up here more in the past few days than the last month combined. Neil is in his spot, far too close to the edge of the roof, both legs dangling off the edge. He’s hunched over, so more of him is hanging over than not, and a sick lurch goes through Andrew’s stomach.

“You going to take your chances with the fall?” he asks, satisfied when Neil pulls back just the slightest bit and looks back at him.

“Jumping wouldn’t solve anything,” he says. His voice is as hollow as Allison’s had been. He clearly blames himself. He isn’t wrong.

“Will running?”

Neil actually looks startled at that. “What?”

“You look like you’re half a second away from bolting. Is that what you’re going to do? Find one of those other safe houses and hope Riko doesn’t come after you there?” Andrew takes out his pack of cigarettes and frowns when he remembers he already smoked the last of them today. He’ll have to get more tomorrow, fuck.

“Wouldn’t it be better?” Neil asks. He looks away from Andrew and claws at the edge of the roof. “None of you would be in any danger if I hadn’t come here with you. You should have sent me away that first night.”

“We’d be in danger as long as Kevin is here. Did you forget Riko wants him, too?” 

Neil snorts. “Riko wants revenge from Kevin. He doesn’t need him the way he needs me.”

Andrew sits down next to Neil. “Full of yourself, aren’t you?”

The Omega shrugs. “Is it conceit if it’s the truth?”

Touché. 

“Don’t leave,” he says instead of answering. “Pretend you’re not a rabbit and stand your ground.”

Neil huddles in on himself.

Sitting on the roof without a cigarette in hand makes Andrew’s skin crawl with cravings. He leans over the edge to look straight down, but it’s not high enough to make the fear fill him up the way he wants. Andrew looks over at Neil and sees him watching.

“I’ll take my question, now.”

“Okay.”

“Why didn’t Riko bond you?”

It’s unsurprising that Neil shuts down at the question. Any of the dry amusement that might have clung to him brought by Andrew’s presence disappears. He doesn’t smell of anything, really. It’s almost eerie not to be able to smell his emotions. Betsy has control over herself, as does Renee most of the time. Neil just smells…dead. Not there at all. It’s disconcerting.

“I don’t know,” Neil says. His arms are wrapped around his knees and he leans his head against the right one so that his tattoo is pressed against it and hidden. “I don’t know that he tried, or if it was important to him. He owns me in every other way, so maybe he didn’t care about that.”

“Maybe he couldn’t?”

Neil shrugs. “I don’t know,” he says again. “He certainly bit me other places. And no one else was allowed to bite or touch my neck. Maybe he was saving it.”

It doesn’t make sense why someone as obsessed with control and being in power as Riko wouldn’t stake a mate claim on Neil. It would guarantee no one else could take him away, no one else could have him—

Ah.

No other Alpha would come near a mated Omega. They wouldn’t be able to get it up. There was something about a mated Omega that smelled wrong, or so Andrew had been led to believe by books and research. The only way a mated Omega would go back to being available would be if the claim was broken by the death of the Alpha. 

Sure, Riko could have gotten in Betas to carry out his disgusting tasks. Betas weren’t attuned to Omegas like Alphas were on a biological level. But Riko’s ravens were made up of Alphas, and Andrew can’t imagine Riko outsourcing his torture like that.

Neil doesn’t seem to know that’s the reason why Riko wouldn’t have bonded him. Andrew could tell him, could take away that element of unknown, but there isn’t really a reason why. He’s already been hurt by it; why does he need to know that it’s a tool of rape? It won’t make anything better.

Andrew isn’t the type to shy away from the truth, no matter how much it hurts. But looking at Neil, curled up on the edge of a literal and proverbial fall, he has no desire to share this one. Andrew is not cruel for the sake of cruelty. When he hurts, there’s always a reason behind it. He can find none in this.

So Andrew swallows the truth down, buries it in the dark pit inside himself where his rage dwells. He hates Neil, but that doesn’t mean he wants to hurt him.

“You should probably go inside. Nicky has booze if you’re ready to embrace it.” Andrew knows Nicky will have saved him some whisky from their stash. Kevin’s probably already passed out in a vodka stupor. 

Neil shakes his head but stands up still. “I’m fine,” he says. “Don’t need anyone to babysit me. I’ll try to sleep.” 

He turns to leave, but pauses at Andrew’s side. Neil looks like he wants to say something, or to reach out and find comfort in Andrew’s touch. He keeps his hands to himself, though. Smart decision.

“I’m not your answer,” Andrew says without looking at him. 

Neil walks back to the door. “I never thought you were.” 

-

The next few days are quiet. Wymack stays true to his word and doesn’t open the Court. He sends out a press release about the “tragedy” of Seth’s death. Some of the Court’s clientele who clearly didn’t know Seth create a memorial for the Beta outside the Court doors. It’s full of pictures and cards and flowers and Andrew has to refrain from tipping it over when he passes by it on his way to get cigarettes.

Dan and her lot don’t return until midway through the week. Renee texts to warn him that they’ll be back, and Andrew doesn’t bother replying. What does he care if they’re coming back. Whatever bad blood is between him and them can’t be any worse than it already is. Either they hate him or they don’t. He doesn’t care about degrees. 

The only thing of interest that happens is that Neil _doesn’t_ bolt the moment the rest of them aren’t looking. He joins them at breakfast and stays quiet in his chair the rest of the day when he’s not joining Andrew on the roof. The fact that he stays is possibly a minor miracle, especially since he smells of guilt more often than not. Kevin trying to pickle himself with liquor is just business as usual.

Neil pulls Allison aside when the rest of the Foxes join them back at the Court. Andrew doesn’t mean to eavesdrop, but he’s close enough to hear and he doesn’t care about giving them privacy.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly, trying to look the Alpha in the eye and failing. He’s all hunched in on himself again, like he’s waiting for a hit that might come.

Allison stares at him for a long time. “Do you think this is your fault?”

“Isn’t it? Seth wouldn’t have died if I hadn’t come.”

“Seth was a fucking idiot with a death wish.”

Neil doesn’t fidget where he stands, but it looks like he wants to. “Still. He…Weren’t you mated?”

“Don’t be stupid,” Allison says dully. “He didn’t take for that shit and I didn’t want to be with him for the rest of my life.” She probably didn’t expect to be with him for the rest of _his_ though.

She reaches out a hand and tugs on the curls hanging in Neil’s face. “If I blamed you, you would know it. But unless your name is Riko, you have nothing to fear from me.” There’s a fierce look on her face that tells him Allison won’t be sitting back to watch Riko fall. She’ll be on the front lines, ready to reach for his throat herself.

Neil nods and looks at her, a heartbreaking look on his face. Or heartbreaking if you had a heart that wasn’t as calloused as Andrew’s, anyway. “I’m still sorry he’s gone.”

Allison actually laughs. “No, you’re not. You didn’t even know him, and what you did know wasn’t very nice. He was an asshole.” She tugs on his hair again, harder, until Neil unwinds from around himself and takes a step closer. Andrew tenses. “I don’t need your sympathy or pity, Neil,” Allison tells him. “Just leave me alone for now.”

“Okay.” Neil steps away when Allison lets go of his hair and watches her walk away, going over to her desk and the work that’s probably waiting for her there.

When Andrew looks around to see who else was aware of the confrontation, he isn’t surprised to see Renee standing in her chapel, watching him. She nods once and heads off after Allison while Andrew watches Neil stand and stare off into nothing for a while.

“I’ve got some bad news,” Wymack calls out from the doorway of his office. Everyone stops what they’re doing to turn and look at him. 

“Worse than what we’re already dealing with?” Nicky asks from the couch beside Aaron. They were going over each other’s homework, since classes were still a thing.

Wymack frowns at them. “Would I say it was if it wasn’t?” No one answers back. “You know we’ve got the Day Foundation banquet in a few weeks, yes?”

“Of course,” Kevin says. Andrew isn’t sure where he came from, but he’s edging his way closer towards him, to no one’s surprise.

“Well, I’ve just been informed we’ll be adding a few names to the guest list.”

It’s so quiet that they can all hear the way Kevin’s breathing picks up.

“The Moriyamas will be coming to the banquet this year.”


	8. Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Banquet time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey! another chapter! thanks so much for all the kind words from last chapter--i really really appreciate it. i'm still adjusting to my meds and writing is hard, but this came out pretty alright, i think.
> 
> warnings/spoilers: none, actually? riko is a fuck, but that's no surprise. maybe like...implied future rape? i guess?
> 
> anyway, i hope you enjoy this one! i think we're...getting into the final stretch? gosh.
> 
> oh! i didn't mention this breaks the formula of two neil/two andrew chapters. dunno if i'll go back to it or not! just depends on whose point of view i need/want for what's going on!

Predictably, Wymack’s news causes chaos at the Foxhole Court. Kevin spends every available opportunity drinking himself stupid, a new habit that Neil understands is what gets Kevin through the days now. Dan and Allison are both furious, Matt is worried and Renee quietly concerned. Neil is afraid to look too closely at her concern—he doesn’t know what part of her he’ll see. Aaron doesn’t seem to care and Nicky is obviously scared. Andrew doesn’t seem surprised.

Neil’s left alone a lot over the next few weeks; the rest of the Foxes are still in college and have to attend classes, even if Andrew is the one bullying Kevin into going more often than not. Wymack doesn’t bother him and Abby only really tries to approach him a few times before giving up. 

“Why are they even coming?” Dan bites out, slamming her hands down on Allison’s desk. The other Alpha glances at her before going back to her work.

“Tetsuji is technically on the board of directors for the Kayleigh Day Foundation,” Kevin mumbles into his book. When he hasn’t been drinking himself into unconsciousness, he’s always got his nose pressed to some book or another. Neil’s used to it from their time together.

“Yeah, but he’s never been to any of the Day Foundation Banquets before,” Dan argues. There’s a mulish set to her mouth.

Allison continues to type away at something that Neil can’t see from his perch at the kitchen island. “No, but he has every right to be there. Most of the board usually is. It’s more unusual if he’s _not_ there, really.”

“That’s because Riko always showed up with Kevin hanging off his arm,” Nicky adds. 

Kevin shudders and hunches in on himself, but Nicky’s comment actually makes Neil sit up with interest.

“Were you two dating?” he asks. Kevin seems surprised Neil is directly addressing him. “Kathy Ferdinand said something on her show, too, but I was too distracted after to think about it. She said you’d left him.”

The scent of discomfort replaces any surprise Kevin had at Neil talking to him. “I…it was implied, by the media. That we were together. His family took me in and Tetsuji was my godfather. People thought it made sense that we would gravitate towards each other.”

“Even the last three years?”

“Well…” Kevin fidgets in his seat, toying with his book. “I didn’t go to the Banquet last year, not with everything going on. Riko didn’t, either. It just made everything seem more like we’d broken up and we were both trying not to face the media. Before that, I went with him to keep up appearances. We needed to be seen together, showing a firm connection between the Day Company and Moriyama LLC. My mom’s business made theirs more legitimate, I guess.”

Neil doesn’t care about any of that, not at all. “Why didn’t he take me? Why pretend to be with you if he already had me?” Why was he imprisoned in Evermore? It didn’t matter that Riko had kidnapped him, had been involved with his mom’s death. No one would know that, or know who Neil was. They would just think Neil was Riko’s Omega mate.

“I don’t know,” Kevin says. “Maybe he was worried the press would find out who you are and link the Moriyamas back to your father, which they wouldn’t have wanted.”

“And why is that?” Andrew finally sits up and joins the conversation. Dan, Allison and Nicky all look on, curious as well, but say nothing. “Why wouldn’t the Moriyamas want to be linked to Neil’s father? Who was he that the media would care about a connection?”

Neil watches Kevin very carefully, to see his reaction. He hasn’t told Andrew about his father, hasn’t told anyone, because they don’t need to know. Knowing about Nathan Wesninski will just put them in danger, if not from the man himself, then from his father’s associates who might still be out there. 

Kevin licks his lips and glances between Neil and Andrew. Neil doesn’t need to be able to smell him to know how worried and anxious he is over the question. “He was a criminal that worked for the Moriyamas,” he says at last. It matches what Neil told Andrew, at least.

“Was?”

“I don’t know anything about him anymore, obviously.” 

It’s a lie, or might be one. Neil doesn’t actually know. He doesn’t know how closely Kevin has kept tabs on his life since leaving Evermore. He’d said he was trying his best to get Neil out, but that could have been a lie, too. Especially since everyone was as surprised by Neil showing up as he himself was. If Kevin was planning something, wouldn’t he have told them about him?

Just another reason not to trust the Alpha.

Andrew doesn’t look like he trusts that Kevin’s telling the truth, either, but their stories do line up and he settles back into his seat and looks away, clearly disinterested in the conversation now he’s got his answers.

“Neil, you’ll have to come with us shopping tomorrow, of course. Nothing we got when you came here is appropriate for an event of this caliber,” Allison says after the silence has stretched thin between them.

Nicky sits up in his seat. “Yeah! You need something suitably black-tie.” He grins at Neil, excited. “You’ll let me do your hair and makeup, right?”

“I feel like of the two of us, I’m clearly the superior choice for that,” Allison says with her nose in the air.

The two start to argue between them while Neil looks on in confusion. What were they even talking about? Why would he need a special outfit, or for anyone to do anything to his hair, let alone come near him with makeup. Were they going on camera again?

“Guys, did you even tell Neil he was coming?” Dan asks when she notices the look on Neil’s face.

Allison and Nicky stop bickering and look at her guiltily.

“You’re useless, the lot of you.” Regardless of her words, Dan sounds fond when she leans back against Allison’s desk. “Neil, you’re coming to the Banquet with us.”

Neil frowns. “Why am _I_ going? I don’t work for the Court.” From what he’s gathered, everyone who volunteers or officially works for the Foxhole Court is going to the Banquet, Wymack and Abby included.

“Because I’m out a date and you’re up to bat,” Allison says. There’s nothing cruel or sad about her expression, but the words are a sharp reminder to Neil that it is his fault for what happened to Seth, even if Allison doesn’t think so.

“Oh,” he says. 

“ _I_ wanted to take you as my date, but Andrew nearly ki—ack!” Nicky is cut off by Andrew’s elbow in his gut, hard enough to make him bend over.

Neil looks at Andrew, taking in his careful air of nonchalance. Andrew doesn’t look back at him, just continues to gaze into the middle distance like he’s not listening, even with his cousin coughing and wheezing beside him.

“Like that was ever going to happen,” Allison says as she rolls her eyes. “I have first dibs.”

Despite what they’re saying, Neil doesn’t actually feel threatened by Allison or Nicky, anymore. He’s had weeks to get used to them and their bizarre forms of affection. Allison isn’t interested in him at all and while Nicky might talk about how attractive Neil is—in English or German, which had startled Neil when he first heard and recognized the language—he’s completely committed to his mate in Germany that he talks about all the time.

“Erik said we’d make a cute couple,” Nicky says with a pout. He’s still rubbing his sternum like it hurts. 

Allison stands up and flicks her hair over her shoulder. “Oh well. Guess we’ll never know.” She walks away and ruffles Neil’s hair before turning the corner into Wymack’s office.

“You don’t _have_ to go, not if you don’t want to,” Dan says quietly once she’s gone. “None of us expect you to, not with the possibility of Riko coming.”

“It’s safer if he comes,” Kevin protests, finally sitting back up. “If he’s here by himself, there’s no guarantee that Riko won’t send someone after him while we’re all distracted.”

Neil hadn’t thought of that. If the Foxes were gone, there was no guarantee of his safety. Even if he went to the venue the Banquet would take place in but stayed inside, Riko could still pull something.

“If he’s in front of people, if they see him and know his face, there’s less of a chance Riko can do anything.”

They’re brave words from a coward, Neil thinks. He doesn’t know if Kevin means them, is genuinely looking out for his health and safety, or if he thinks it would be safer at the Banquet for himself if Neil is there to keep Riko distracted. It would be far easier to secret Neil away than Kevin Day at an event in his mother’s honor.

Neil doesn’t say any of this aloud, though. There’s a chance Kevin is using him as an advantage, or he might genuinely just think it’s safer for Neil. It doesn’t matter either way. If the Foxes are all going, it makes sense for Neil to go, too.

Andrew gets up from the couch beside Nicky and heads towards the front door. It puts him in a direct path with Neil. He isn’t surprised when Andrew reaches out and squeezes the back of his neck. It’s a comforting gesture, one Andrew has used in the past few weeks to get Neil out of his head and to stifle his panic. Neil’s shoulders go down. He hadn’t even known he was hunching them.

“Remember,” Andrew says lowly, ignoring the way Dan and Nicky are watching him. “We have a deal. I’ll rip his throat out before I let him take you.”

His words should be chilling, but Neil takes comfort in the promise. It’s not a threat, he knows. Andrew doesn’t threaten people. He just makes promises and keeps them.

“Okay,” he says.

Andrew squeezes once before letting go.

-

Neil regrets agreeing to go as soon as Nicky pulls him into the department store with men’s suits. It’s not a mall, thank God. Neil still isn’t great around big crowds, tends to panic when he gets overwhelmed by too many scents and people. This store is more upscale than Neil is used to or expecting, but Allison walks in like she owns the place. Maybe she does, for all he knows.

Nicky prattles on happily about cuts and fabrics and colors while Neil trails after him. He and Allison argue over what would look the best on Neil, but he’s used to that by now. Nicky tends to agitate Allison more often than not, and he’d even taken Neil aside to tell him to watch out for Allison. 

“She’s a catty bitch and once she gets her claws into you, it’s game over.”

It was easy enough to ignore the Beta. As friendly as Nicky was, he still tended to keep to his family and Kevin and look for reasons to butt heads with the others. Neil had noticed that of what Dan called the Monsters. They were separate from the rest of the Foxes, even though they all worked for the same organization and went to the same school. They lived in the same Dorm building, too. For a group in such close proximity all the time, they sure didn’t seem to like each other.

Inexplicably, Neil likes Allison. She is prickly and more likely to insult than compliment, but she’s easy to be around. She doesn’t expect anything out of Neil other than for him to listen to her when she talks and to stand up for himself a little more. 

Matt’s been offering to teach Neil how to fight in their makeshift gym, and while Neil has been happy enough to run on the treadmill at any given opportunity, he’s not interested in boxing. He watches Dan and Matt go at each other, and he even once saw Renee and Andrew brawl with knives in a way that sent him to the corner of the room in terror. Andrew had to walk him through his panic while Renee apologized for not informing him what they were going to do. 

But Allison is content to let Neil be himself. She pushes and picks at him, but not in a nasty way. The Alpha doesn’t try to change him or challenge him, and it’s such a complete departure from any of the other Alphas that had been in Neil’s life, from the other Alpha women he’d known, that he almost has to relax around her.

That’s something he’s learned about all of them, really. Dan and Allison and Renee and Andrew. None of them are the same type of Alpha that he’s used to. Matt and Nicky and Aaron and Wymack are different, too. None of them act the way they should and while it throws him off, it’s in a good way.

The Foxes aren’t bad people. Unapologetically brash and different, yes, but not bad. It’s easy to just _be_ around them, without having to look over his shoulder for the next attack. Even with Renee around. She still catches him off guard a lot and makes him think of painful memories, but she’s unfailingly patient and kind to the point that Neil isn’t afraid of her on sight.

“Hey, foxy, you there?” Allison tugs on his bangs and Neil blinks out of his thoughts. Her expression is softer than she usually lets the other Foxes see, something she keeps private just for the two of them, he’s come to realize.

“Sorry, I was just drifting,” he says, reaching up to catch her hand and squeeze it once before letting go.

She grins at him. “Well, drift on over here. I think we finally came to an agreement on what suit would look best for you.”

Neil still doesn’t understand the fuss the two of them are causing about what he’ll wear. He isn’t known like Kevin or Allison, no one will be focusing on him at a banquet full of rich and famous people. But he lets the Alpha lead him over to where Nicky is standing in front of the changing room, looking positively gleeful.

“This is going to be great,” Nicky says. From someone who usually wears pastels and neon mixed together, it’s a bit worrying.

Allison leans in and whispers, “don’t worry. I didn’t let him go overboard. Even _I_ think it looks good, and you know how picky I am.” It’s true.

Neil takes the proffered suit and steps into the changing room, trusting their decision.

-

“This is going to be a fucking disaster.”

Neil rolls his eyes. Kevin’s been moping around between drinks all afternoon, predicting their doom with every breath. It was annoying in the limo Allison rented to get them up to Richmond, and it’s annoying in the hotel suite they’re getting ready in.

“Will you hurry up? We’re going to be later than is fashionable,” Nicky says as he adjusts his tie in the full-length mirror hanging on the wall. He looks nice in his dark grey suit, his hair artfully coiffed. There’s a subtle line of eyeliner around his eyes that make them look wider than usual. It’s definitely a departure from what he usually wears and what Neil first saw him in at the club.

Grumbling, Kevin comes out of the bathroom. He’s in a black tux, which Nicky snickers at as being boring, but Kevin ignores. There’s a flask in his hand that he drinks from.

The phone in Neil’s pocket vibrates and he pulls it out to read the text. “Allison says they’re all ready to go.” Another text, from Renee this time. “Aaron and Andrew are waiting in the lounge.”

Neil’s been ready to go for a while now, but Kevin asked him to stick close until he was ready to go.

“Better to have all the idiots in one place so I know where they are,” Andrew had said blandly.

He’s a little nervous to be so close to both Evermore and Baltimore, unsure why this banquet is so far away from the Foxhole Court. Allison had said something about more politicians and celebrities being willing to come to Richmond than some nowhere town in South Carolina, but it’d all gone over Neil’s head.

“Ready?” Nicky asks, holding out his hand. 

“Yeah, okay.” Neil lets Nicky pull him up off the bed he’s been waiting on. They all leave the suite and Neil smiles when he sees Allison, Dan, Matt and Renee waiting by the elevators for them.

Matt lets out a low whistle when he sees them. “Damn, kids. You clean up real nice.”

“Who are you calling a kid?” Nicky asks with a grin.

The other Beta is wearing a light grey suit with a purple tie and Neil is surprised to see his hair isn’t spiked up like usual. He looks older with his hair down and slicked back. Dan is wearing a low-cut jumpsuit in the same color purple as Matt’s tie.

Renee has on a floor-length dress in some light, pale floral-printed material that seems to float around her ankles. The ends of her white hair are a soft peach color and the only accessory she has is her cross necklace.

Allison looks like she’s come straight from some sort of fashion event and is ready to step onto a movie set. Her dress has slits that go dangerously high and show off her toned thighs, and her heels are at least five inches, making her tower over everyone but Matt. They also make her calves look like steel. The dress is a dazzling crimson that matches the accents in Neil’s suit.

She looks delighted as she eyes Neil up and down. “Not half bad, Josten,” she says, latching onto his arm once they get close enough. “I’m going to be the envy of the ball.”

“I thought this was a charity event,” Renee says. She sounds amused and she pats Kevin’s arm. “You all look lovely.”

“The same to you, m’lady,” Nicky says with an obnoxious bow. 

Kevin frowns and jabs at the elevator button while the rest of them grin. “Aren’t we late?” he asks.

“You were the one taking forever,” Neil reminds him. 

The Alpha soundly ignores him and leads them into the elevator with a stubborn expression.

“Now, you’ve never been to something like this,” Allison tells him. 

She’s leaning against him and Neil looks at the two of them in the reflection of the elevator doors. His suit is a muted brown and red plaid with a black vest underneath and a crimson handkerchief in the pocket. He doesn’t look nearly nice enough to be Allison’s date, but she’s the one who picked the outfit, so she must approve.

“Pay attention, foxy,” Allison says with a laugh. “There’s going to be loads of press, and we’ll have to walk down a red carpet before we get to the actual venue. Can you handle that?” 

“Probably.” Neil isn’t sure if he can, but the Foxes have promised they’ll keep him safe and in their sights the whole night, so he should be fine.

The elevator dings to signal their arrival to the lobby. The group step out and Neil immediately spots the twins by the lobby doors. Aaron looks impatient, which isn’t a surprise. The Beta, Katelyn, sitting and chatting happily at his side is someone Neil doesn’t really know, but she makes Aaron less prickly, it seems. 

He looks at Andrew and their eyes meet like Andrew was just waiting for Neil’s focus to come to him. Unlike Aaron, who’s in a dark blue suit that matches Katelyn’s cocktail dress, Andrew is in all black. It’s not a suit, even though Neil was sure this was supposed to be a formal event. He’s got a black turtleneck on and black slacks. He’s like a big bruise, a void of color other than his blond hair and intense hazel eyes.

Andrew lets his gaze slide down Neil and Neil feels it like a physical touch, shivering when Andrew looks up again.

Wymack and Abby emerge from the next elevator. He’s in a tux like Kevin, although it doesn’t sit nearly so naturally on him and he looks uncomfortable. Abby’s in a white evening gown.

“Practice for the wedding, huh?” Dan asks slyly. 

“Hush,” Abby says. There’s a smile lurking on her face, though, and she takes them all in with a nod. “I guess we’re all ready, then.”

Allison’s crimson-painted nails tap against Neil’s arm. “The limo’s waiting outside. Let’s do this.”

-

No matter what he said, Neil really isn’t prepared for the crush of photographers and people waiting for them at the Banquet venue. Voices start shouting as soon as their car pulls up, and cameras flash until all Neil can see are white spots in his vision. The sounds and smells are overwhelming when the door is opened, and it only gets worse when Kevin steps out.

They’ve pre-planned the order of who leaves the limo. After Kevin is Aaron and Katelyn, then Andrew, to keep an eye on both of them. Nicky gets out and then holds his arm out to Renee. Wymack and Abby are next, then Dan and Matt. Neil wasn’t happy about going last, but Allison insisted.

“You save the best for last, of course,” she said while teaching him how to properly apply varnish to her nails in an even layer.

The voices and people crush in closer when Neil gets out of the limo, and when he helps Allison out. There are several people shouting Allison’s name, with cameras and without. Most of them clearly aren’t actually here for the Banquet, dressed in street clothes. The press all beg Allison to look their way.

“Why do they know who you are?” Neil asks over the din of noise. The rest of the Foxes are scattered across the red carpet and Kevin is leading the charge. There’s a public-ready smile on his face and he waves once, but he’s heading to the open doors with purpose.

“Everyone knows who I am,” Allison says easily. She pauses and poses for a camera crew, but doesn’t talk to the person with the microphone. “I’m single, I come from a prestigious family and I’m an Alpha. What’s not to want?”

Neil watches everything with wide eyes and startles when some of the people call _his_ name. Not his real one, of course, but the one the public knows him as, now. He grips onto Allison’s arm when more people start looking at him and cameras pan his way.

“We should go inside,” he says, mouth suddenly dry.

Allison takes pity on him and moves quicker to the doorway that the rest of the Foxes have already go through. The crush of people is a lot easier to deal with when it’s behind him. There are still a _lot_ of people in the hall, but they don’t seem to care about him. Some of them call out to Allison with warm words of greeting, but they don’t acknowledge him at all.

“Go find Kevin,” Allison whispers into his ear. “I need to schmooze.”

Neil watches Allison walk away and start up a conversation with a woman that seems to be dipped head-to-toe in diamonds. He looks around frantically, trying to pick out anyone else he knows. He sees a flash of Matt, who’s head and shoulders taller than most people, but more people move around Neil and he can’t find him again.

There are so many people, Alphas and Betas, and maybe a slight scent of an Omega or two. It’s overwhelming, he was wrong, there seem to be just as many people milling around with drinks in their hands instead of cameras and cellphones. Some of them are starting to look at him now, too, interest and curiosity evident on their faces. His breathing picks up, getting too fast and quick, the longer he’s left alone.

“You’re like a beacon to anyone without a broken nose,” comes an amused voice at his ear.

Neil spins around and latches onto Andrew’s arm, letting go immediately when Andrew looks down at his hand. “Andrew,” he wheezes out, trying to get his breathing back to normal.

Andrew grips the back of his neck and squeezes. “Calm down, rabbit. You’re drawing more attention to yourself.”

He steers Neil through the crowds, not caring if his elbows stray too far into other people’s spaces. Neil can actually draw oxygen into his lungs now that Andrew is there, guiding him away from the majority of people.

There are round tables everywhere around the huge room, decorations that Neil barely takes in. Most people are up and milling around, getting drinks from waiters walking around the room. There’s a stage at the far end of the room with a podium and microphone. Andrew takes them to a table close to the stage where most of the Foxes are standing around. 

“Oh, you found him,” Kevin says once they step up. He looks pale and there’s sweat beading his forehead, even though Neil knows he’s been drinking most of the day to get his courage up. 

Andrew says nothing as he deposits Neil in front of the Alpha for visual inspection. Neil stands up straight and lets his shoulders fall now that he’s surrounded by the people that make him feel safe.

“Here’s the plan,” Wymack starts. “I need you out there rubbing elbows, being congenial. Don’t piss anyone off, don’t say anything stupid. Kevin, just…don’t be yourself. You know how off-putting that is.”

Neil can’t help his amused snort at that. Wymack ignores him, except for the grin tugging at his mouth.

“Andrew, please don’t kill anyone. Neil, make sure you stick with someone at all times. Buddy system, got it?”

“I’m not a little kid,” Neil says petulantly.

“No, but you are a vulnerable.” He doesn’t say it like it’s a bad thing, and that’s the only reason Neil doesn’t huff. Wymack claps his hands once, like he’s a coach encouraging his team. “Okay guys. Let’s get out there and empty some pocketbooks.”

“Aye, aye, captain!” Dan shouts with a fist in the air. 

She, Matt, Renee, Aaron, Katelyn, Nicky, Wymack and Abby all disperse to find potential donors. It leaves Kevin, Andrew and Neil by the table. There’s already an empty champagne flute by Kevin’s hand and he reaches out to get another from a passing waiter. He downs it quickly and then turns to the two of them.

“I need to make the rounds. You should both stick close.”

Andrew rolls his eyes in answer.

For lack of any better option, Neil follows after them. Kevin is good at talking to other people, surprisingly. He’s amiable and smiles and shakes hands. He seems to know most everyone he interacts with, and if he doesn’t, he acts like they’re fast friends anyway. Neil knows that almost everyone Kevin talks to is charmed by the Alpha.

Seeing Kevin like this is jarring. Sure, he saw him on the Kathy Ferdinand show, but this is something else. This is Kevin pretending he’s a real boy, like he’s not afraid of most everything and isn’t hiding in a small town in South Carolina from his foster family. This Kevin is confident and amiable. Most people don’t look at his two silent shadows when Kevin is talking to them, too caught up in his presence. 

There’s a variety of outfits and scents that fills up the place. Neil is almost tempted to cover his nose at how powerful it is. So many emotions and natural scents weaving in and out of each other. He glances over at Andrew and sees him frowning like the smell is bothering him, too.

“Kevin Day! As I live and breathe!”

Kevin suddenly stands straighter, actual delight painting his face and scent. He grabs the hand that’s extended to him, shaking it with far more enthusiasm than necessary. It’s echoed in the scent of the Alpha standing in front of him, however.

“Jeremy! It’s great to see you!” Kevin actually sounds like that’s true.

Neil feels himself freeze as he takes in the other Alpha. This is Jeremy, Jeremy Knox, from the Trojan Warriors in LA. That’s what Kathy had said, right? He’s just as tall and tan and happy looking as his picture from the interview. But if Jeremy is there, that means…

“Neil.”

He bites his lip hard, sure that he’s dreaming. Behind Jeremy is Jean, taller and darker than the Alpha, eyes wide and staring at Neil like he’s just as unreal. The Beta brushes past Jeremy and Kevin, stops just out of touching range of Neil. His eyes are sweeping across him, like he’s trying to inspect every visible part of Neil, make sure he’s okay.

“Jean,” he says, voice wrecked with an emotion he can’t name.

Jean closes his eyes slowly, like hearing Neil’s voice is a revelation. Neil remembers the bruises that were on Jean’s face the last time he saw him, the hunch in his posture that seemed a permanent fixture. He’d smelled like despair and sorrow, like it was a part of him. Now he’s standing straight and tall, he looks healthy, like he’s put on some weight so his cheekbones aren’t knives on his face. He looks…good.

“ _Jean_.”

Before he realizes it, Jean is sweeping him up into an embrace that’s so tight it almost hurts. Neil hears Jeremy mumble something about finding somewhere more private to talk, and they’re all herded into a smaller alcove where less people are around to stare at their reunion.

“Neil, fuck, you’re _here_ ,” Jean breathes into his hair. He’s speaking in French and Neil could cry at the sound of his words.

“I’m here,” he says, holding the Beta tighter. He hadn’t known if he was ready to see Jean or Thea, but he’s stood right in front of Neil and it’s so much. Seeing him, holding him, it’s overwhelming.

Jean pulls back. He reaches out and covers the bandage over Neil’s cheek with his thumb, like he knows what’s under there. Nicky had used makeup to cover the worst of Neil’s visible scars, but Jean knows every hidden part of Neil. He always has. He cradles Neil’s cheek with his hand. 

“I’m so sorry,” he says, continuing in French. “I knew we shouldn’t have left you behind, but I didn’t think…I didn’t think I would live if I stayed.”

“It’s okay,” Neil says. He actually means it. “I’m glad you got out. Are you safe?” He glances over at Jeremy, an unknown Alpha despite his smiles and the soft way he’s watching them, and then back at Jean. “He keeps you safe?”

Jean smiles. It’s the first time in over a year since Neil’s last seen it, and it was so rare in Evermore. “He keeps me safe.” He holds Neil at arm’s length and takes him in. “You look better. How are you doing?”

“I’m fine,” Neil says. Jean frowns at him and Neil can’t help but smile. “I mean it. The Foxes are good, even if they’re a little strange.”

“So I hear.” Jean’s eyes flick to Kevin without saying anything, then to Andrew, watching them both with narrowed eyes. “Neil, I know this might seem sudden, and it’s probably not the best time to ask, but I don’t know when I’ll see you again.” He pauses and glances at Jeremy for a quick second. “I want you to come back to Los Angeles with me. You can stay with us. It will be safer, farther from _him_.” He doesn’t have to say the name for both of them to know who he means.

Neil is shocked to hear the invitation. He doesn’t know quite what to say. Jean is a safe place for him, has always been a safe place for him. But the Foxes, Allison, Andrew…

“Excuse me?” Kevin steps in close. “Why do you think he should go with you?” His French is agitated, not nearly as seamless as theirs. “He’s perfectly safe right where he is.”

Jeremy rounds on the Alpha, using his height advantage to look down at him. “Safe? So close to those who wish him the greatest harm? I know what happened after that atrocious talk show farce you forced him to participate in. He’s not safe with you.”

Kevin blinks, shocked. “How do you know about that?”

“Thea informed me.”

He’s clearly not expecting that answer. “I told her that in confidence!”

“She clearly thought it was more important to tell me than to keep your secret. That’s always been the case with you, hasn’t it?” Jean sneers. 

“Okay boys,” Jeremy says, stepping in with his hands up. The English words break Neil’s shocked silence. “Raising your voice will just make more people curious about what we’re talking about.” He looks at Neil and his expression softens. 

Neil glances at Andrew and sees him looking furious at being left out of the conversation. His fists are clenched at his sides and Neil is surprised there’s not a knife in his hand. Andrew catches Neil’s look and frowns. 

“I fully support Jean’s suggestion,” Jeremy continues on. “We’ve talked about it, and it sounds like a great idea.”

“Do I get a choice?” Neil spits out before he can help himself. It feels like an echo of the argument from his first night at the Court, so long ago now it seems. “Or are you going to ship me around the country like a lost package?”

“If I hear one more French word, I’m going to stop being so patient,” Andrew says, clearly agitated and unwilling to put up with not knowing what’s going on anymore.

Jean frowns and catches his hand, lacing their fingers together. “Of course you have a choice.” His accented English is a concession to Jeremy and Andrew. “I just think it’s better if you come back with me. That Family sticks primarily to the East coast. They almost never bother with the West.”

Neil doubts the Moriyamas don’t have their fingers in a few pies close to Jean. They don’t limit their actions to one territory, the way Neil’s father did. But it takes a lot for Jean to feel safe, and if he thinks it’s better there, it probably is.

“Are you going to run, rabbit?” The German startles Neil into looking directly at Andrew. His face is completely blank as he watches Neil. “Hop away to LA?”

“I—” Neil bites back his answer. He can’t look away from Andrew’s eyes, even with Jean squeezing his fingers and Kevin starting to rant. Going to California would mean leaving the one place he’s felt comfortable in what feels like his whole life. It would mean giving up his friends, even if he doesn’t doubt they would probably keep in contact. 

He finally breaks eye-contact with Andrew and looks back at Jean. “I can’t go with you,” he says.

“That’s right,” someone says, making Neil seize up. “Nathaniel knows where his place is, doesn’t he?”

Neil turns, hackles up already, and sees Riko standing a few feet from their spot, Tetsuji at his side. The stony, dead look on the man’s face sends shivers down Neil’s spine, even more than the burning hatred and hunger on Riko’s.

There’s fear in Neil’s chest, but mostly there’s anger. The longer he’s been away from Riko’s clutches, the more the feeling has grown into a raging boil of rage. He hates Riko, hates Tetsuji, more than he fears them, even knowing what they can and probably will do to him.

“I know that anywhere you are is where I’ll never willingly be,” he spits out.

Riko twitches the slightest bit. “Grown insolent during your time away, have you?” he hisses out. He collects himself when Tetsuji touches his shoulder. “We’ll have to rectify that when you come home.”

“That’s not my home.”

“It is according to your contract,” Tetsuji says coldly. “Which we will be pursuing legally if you do not agree to come back at once.”

Wymack finds them then, bullies his way past the Moriyamas to stand in front of them. “Well, some of us have differing opinions on what ‘legal’ means, don’t we?” he asks. Then he nods to the stage and tables where people are starting to sit down and gather. “We’re needed up there. We’ll save personal chats for later, hm?”

Tetsuji eyes Wymack for a moment before nodding. “Of course.” He keeps his hand on his nephew’s shoulder so Riko is forced to walk with him, even though the younger Alpha is still glaring back at them.

“Fuck,” Wymack says. He lets out a long breath. “That fucking sucked.” 

Neil jumps when Andrew brushes up against his side. His hand is almost numb from how hard Jean is holding it, too. Being surrounded by people who genuinely seem to not want him to go back to Riko is fortifying.

“I need a drink.” Kevin looks faint and he lets Wymack herd him towards their table where the rest of the Foxes are looking at them in concern. 

Jeremy glances down at Jean’s crushing grip. “We have to go to our table as well,” he says.

“I’ll see you before we leave,” Jean says. He squeezes Neil’s hand one last time before letting go and following the Alpha to their seats.

“The rabbit might have claws, after all,” Andrew says. He doesn’t complain when Neil stays half a step behind him on the way back to their table, and he takes the seat beside Neil silently.

Allison frowns when Neil sits down shakily one seat down from her. “Are you alright?”

“Riko,” is all he says. 

She squeezes his shoulder but says nothing as the house lights go down and a spotlight illuminates the stage and Kevin plunks down in the empty spot between them. There’s a man standing there in a nice suit and he smiles as he waits for all the chatter to die down. Once everything is silent, he speaks.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you so much for coming out tonight for the 10th annual Kayleigh Day Foundation Banquet.” He pauses for the raucous round of applause and Neil tunes out.

He’s very aware of where Riko and his uncle are seated, just a few tables away. Whoever was in charge of seating at the Banquet clearly wanted Kevin and Riko close, but not too close. More drama for the news about their fake relationship, perhaps. Neil is also aware of Riko’s gaze burning into him, but he refuses to look over.

The fear is still present. He doesn’t think it’ll ever go away. But he’s livid now. He feels humiliated that Riko would talk that way in front of Jeremy, who’s never been involved in their business before and is seemingly an important person. Like he didn’t think the other Alpha would particularly care how he spoke about Neil. That he definitely wouldn’t intervene if things got physical.

It’s new, this anger. The majority of his life, Neil has just been _afraid_. Afraid of his father and his associates, afraid of their cover being blown while he was on the run with his mom, terrified of Riko and his Ravens and what fresh hell they would put him through. He’s been afraid for his life and afraid for his future.

Neil is so tired of being afraid.

“Reign it in,” Andrew murmurs, eyes still locked on the podium. “I’m sure the whole room can smell you right now.”

He’s aware of Renee’s gaze on him, and maybe there are other people in the room that can smell his anger, but Neil doesn’t care. He _hates_ Riko and he doesn’t care who knows it. They should. They should _know_ that Riko deserves to be hated, especially by him. 

Andrew’s hand hovers over his knee and Neil lifts it the slightest bit it needs to connect, takes a deep breath to try to calm down. Leaking his emotions all over the place won’t do anything productive. It feels good to be angry, but he doesn’t have anything to direct it at right now.

“The first of our speakers tonight is none other than Kayleigh Day’s best friend and business partner, Tetsuji Moriyama!” the man at the podium announces to another wave of applause.

Tetsuji takes his time going up on stage. He stands at the podium and looks out over the crowd. Neil wonders how anyone can look at him and not see an unfeeling automaton. His eyes are just dead.

“When I first met Kayleigh, I knew she was going to do something extraordinary. She did not disappoint. Her business grew with her and her legacy. She established a trust to give back to the communities she loved, here in America and also in her home country of Ireland and mine of Japan. As a member of the Board of Directors of the Day Foundation, I strive to continue Kayleigh’s vision every day. I hope we can come together tonight and make sure we can make her memory proud.”

He pauses for the applause and then goes back to his seat. Neil would be sick over the fake sincerity in his speech if it wouldn’t draw attention. As it is, Kevin’s other hand is on Neil’s other knee and squeezing tightly. _He_ looks sick to his stomach.

The announcer is all smiles at the podium again. “Next, a few words from David Wymack, Director of Day Foundation supported Foxhole Court.”

Wymack stands to go to the stage and Neil bites back his shock. He didn’t know the Beta was going to be saying anything. Wymack looks out of place in his suit in front of a whole crowd of rich and famous people, but there’s determination on his face.

“Kayleigh Day was a force to be reckoned with,” he says. “When I first met her,” his eyes flick to where Tetsuji is sitting, then back to the crowd, “I didn’t think she would be anything other than another spoiled rich girl doing charity for publicity.” There are a few titters from the audience and Neil is amused at how uncomfortable people look at Wymack’s words. No doubt some of them are here for that exact reason.

“But Kayleigh surprised me. She was passionate about helping people. She came from a town in Ireland that was poor, and she was determined to make the world a better place than how she found it.” His knuckles are white from how hard he’s holding onto the podium. “Kayleigh didn’t care about distinction—she was happy to hear you out if you were an Alpha, a Beta or an Omega. Her putting up with me is evidence of that.”

He pauses for the more genuine chuckles. “She was great at business, great at being a friend. But she was great at helping people. That’s what Kayleigh wanted, at the end of the day. To help people. 

“We established The Foxhole Court, and through her Foundation, helped set up our sister charities, the Trojan Warrior program and the Siren House. These places are dedicated to holding up Kayleigh’s ideals and hopes. That we can come together, no matter what our class or our financial status or our background or our distinction, and help each other out. Her dream was to make things better, here, at home, around the world. Our job is to make sure that plays out.”

Wymack sits back down while the audience claps and cheers. He’s a bit red in the face and he immediately takes a drink after he’s sat down. Abby smiles and leans against him, touching his shoulder gently.

“Stirring words from a passionate man,” the announcer says. “Last, but certainly not least, we’ll hear from the Foundation CEO himself, Kayleigh Day’s son, Kevin Day!”

The audience goes wild for Kevin, the same way the audience during the talk show did. Neil knows these people are politicians, celebrities, rich and famous in their own right. But they react to Kevin like the general public. It’s truly bizarre.

Kevin stands up after one last squeeze to Neil’s knee and makes his way to the stage. He seems steady on his feet, even though Neil knows how terrified he is and how much he’s had to drink. 

He stands at the podium for a few moments in silence as the audience quiets down. There’s a picture of his mom behind him on the stage, a huge grin on her face, and he turns to look at it. When he faces forward again, there’s a grim look on his face. 

“You all know why we’re here. My mom was a great woman, one I didn’t have nearly long enough with.” He looks aside, has to visibly collect himself. “Something people don’t talk about a lot is how good a mom she was. She was always there for me, never put her work ahead of my needs. Many people said it was impossible for a single Alpha to raise a child while also heading a multi-national corporation. There’s a lot of stigma around single Alphas raising kids. About as much as there is around Omegas being allowed to be single parents.”

He smiles and it’s a bitter thing. “She was a great mom. Nothing could’ve been better. I would trade all the money, all the fame I have now, just to have her back.” He pauses again. “I know that’s not going to happen. We can’t reverse time, can’t get back the people we loved and lost.

“But we can make sure that we do right by those people. That we keep our promises and do as much good as possible. That’s all my mom wanted. She didn’t care if I played sports or if I followed the traditional Alpha path. She just wanted me to be happy, and she wanted me to do good.

“I hope we can all remember that. I hope we can all try our hardest to do good. There’s so much evil out in the world, so much hurt and anger. We see it every day at the Court. We’re trying our hardest to help right some of that wrong, and I hope all of you try your hardest, too. Thanks so much for being here. I know mom would have been so proud of all of you.”

Kevin’s speech gets a standing ovation. 

He makes his way back to their table and Neil can see the relief on his face. Can smell it once he drops into his seat. Wymack has a proud, fierce look on his face when Neil glances at him, and Abby is wiping away a stray tear. 

The announcer gets back up to talk about a silent auction and various ways to donate, but Neil ignores him. He’s focused on Kevin. He’s heard a variation of this speech before, of course. Kevin was just as passionate on the Kathy Ferdinand show. But the way he’d looked on the stage, vulnerable and resolute, it’s new. 

“You sound like her,” he hears himself saying. Kevin’s head whips to the side and he watches Neil with wide eyes. Neil doesn’t willingly talk to Kevin very often, still bitter and weary. He feels a lot of that float away now, though. Kevin is just as fucked up as he is, has been through a lot at the Moriyama’s hands. He doesn’t know _why_ Kayleigh gave Kevin to them, but he knows now that it must have been hard, after having a real, loving mother for the first half of his life.

“Neil, I—”

“She’d be proud of you, too.”

Kevin turns away quickly, but not before Neil can see the tears in his eyes.

-

The Banquet drags on, but at least the food is good. Kevin is a silent presence at his side and Andrew is mostly concerned with when dessert will be served, but Neil relaxes between them. Even with Riko and Tetsuji a few tables away, he feels almost safe. Allison one seat down keeps leaning around Kevin to whisper gossip to Neil about the people in attendance that makes him laugh. Matt and Dan include him in their conversation. Aaron really isn’t bothered about talking to any of them other than his cousin and Katelyn, but Nicky chatters to everyone. It almost feels like they’re one united group, not one divided into factions.

The feeling is obviously too good to last for long. A familiar presence behind him makes him stiffen and has Dan snarling from her place at the other side of the table. Matt puts a hand on her shoulder, but he looks just as furious at the person behind Neil.

“Having fun, are we?” Riko asks silkily. 

When Neil turns around, he’s unsurprised to see Riko and a few of his Ravens fanned behind him, all looking at Neil. They’re all dressed in black with red ties. It’s over the top, just like Riko. 

“I was until you decided to ruin things with your stink,” Neil says. He feels brave beside Andrew, with the rest of the Foxes at his back. Andrew’s already got a knife in his hand hidden away from anyone else’s line of sight.

Riko frowns. “You really have learned bad habits, haven’t you? You’ll need to curb that attitude by the time you come back, or I’ll have to teach you manners all over again.”

“I’m not going back,” Neil hisses, furious.

“Of course you are. We miss you back home, don’t we?” he gestures to the Ravens he has with him with a smile, the ones that make Neil’s skin shudder automatically. They all grin and the stench of predatory interest comes off them. 

“Then you can fuck each other for company.” Neil’s face is flush with anger. His hands are shaking and he isn’t sure if it’s from his rage or from the words he’s saying. They make Riko mad, which was the point, but he’s still heady from the adrenaline.

The smile on Riko’s face falls. He smells like fury. “You have until the summer to fix that attitude, Nathaniel. Then we’ll see how brave you are. You and him both,” he flicks his eyes to Kevin, shaking in his seat, then back to Neil. “You’ll be coming back to me, one way or another.”

“I think the fuck not,” Neil says. 

The Ravens turn to leave, making a path for their boss. Riko leans close, ignoring the growls from behind Neil and the way Andrew’s knife becomes visible.

“One more thing, Nathaniel,” he says softly. His fury is overtaken by the smell of vicious glee. “Good luck dealing with your upcoming heat alone, darling.” He pulls back and the smile on his face echoes his scent and leaves with his Ravens.

All of Neil’s anger is extinguished and replaced with dawning horror.


	9. Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heat week pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this part is shorter than the rest, but there's a reason for that. i wanted to get some of neil's pov for his head, but i also wanted andrew's, but i didn't want to have them both in the same chapter for dumb reasons. so this one is shorter, but i'll be posting the next chapter/second half either later today or tomorrow, as soon as i'm done writing it.
> 
> chapter warnings/spoilers: i mean, every warning that comes with a heat? nothing is very explicit, but there's still issues regarding bodily autonomy. the next chapter will have more specific warnings. i just can't be very nice to neil for long, it seems.
> 
> please be patient with me doing it this way! it's all for a reason, i promise. you might think it's a dumb one when you finally get it, but at least it exists? thanks as always for reading and i hope you enjoy.
> 
> also! i've already got a plan for my next fic (actually two, but i'll be good and only work on one at a time), so this one is definitely going to be wrapping up soon. thank god.

Neil leaves the Banquet in a state of numb shock. He knows they stay for a little longer, knows Matt and Dan ask him what’s wrong and don’t seem to believe his mumbled _I’m fine_. He knows Kevin is pale and trembling and Andrew is furious. But he feels detached from it all.

How could he have forgotten…? Something that has been such a key component of his life, has been the thing his whole life revolves _around_. And he forgot? Was he truly going so soft that he forgot such an important thing? What else had he forgotten? Would he still be able to run? Would he remember his mom’s lessons? Could he?

Jean is at the hotel somehow, watching him with worry written all over his face. He has Neil’s phone in his hands, somehow, did Neil give it to him? He inputs something, it takes a while, and then presses it back into Neil’s lax grip.

“If you need anything at all, Neil, you have my number. Jeremy and Thea’s, too. Please don’t hesitate.” He draws Neil in for a crushing hug that Neil doesn’t return, still too dazed. “Stay safe,” he whispers into Neil’s ear before drawing away and joining Jeremy at the doors to the hotel.

Someone must lead him to the elevator and up to the suite he’s sharing with Andrew and Kevin. No one touches him other than Jean’s last, lingering hug. That’s fine. Neil doesn’t want anyone coming near him. Andrew takes the foldout couch in the living area of the suite and Kevin takes the bed nearest the door. Neil settles into his own bed and stares at the dark ceiling.

-

There’s a much more sensible bus to take them home the next day. The drive is long and mostly silent. Neil can hear Dan and Matt murmuring to each other, drawing in others every now and then, but other than that, a heavy feeling settles over them.

Wymack drops the Foxes off in front of their dorm building at Palmetto State University. Neil’s never seen the campus before, and he takes it in in a detached fashion as the Foxes depart the bus. There are students milling around, laughing and smiling and leading their lives. They’re completely unaware of the storm building inside of Neil. 

For not the first time, Neil damns his distinction. Why couldn’t he have been a Beta? He’s glad he’s not an Alpha, he’s already too much like his father. But why did he have to be cursed to be an _Omega_?

They head back to the Foxhole Court. Neil is the last to get off the bus and he ignores Wymack’s concerned look as he makes his way into the building. He stops only when Abby reaches out to touch his arm, flinching back.

Abby’s mouth twists in hurt and she puts her hand back down. “Neil. I don’t know what’s going on, but I know it’s something. Will you please talk to me?”

Neil looks at her and all he can see is the nurse who tended to him at Evermore, the one who gave him the shots to start this whole terrible thing. She might not have been the one who prescribed them, she might have objected, but she still _did_ it.

“My heat is coming,” he says, just for the satisfaction in seeing realization crawl across her face. 

“Oh, Neil,” she whispers. “How close is it? Suppressants won’t work if it’s soon, but I have birth control for you.”

It’s just like Evermore, what she could _give_ him there. It’s too much, all he can see.

“I don’t want it.”

“That’s fine, but if you choose to spend your heat with someone—” she starts.

“Why the fuck would I spend it with anyone?” Neil spits out. His fog is being replaced by his anger. Why would she think he wants to spend his heat with anyone, after all the ones he’s gone through without his choice?

Abby twists her hands in her shirt. “Neil, you have to know your heat will be worse if you don’t have someone with you. Without suppressants and without a partner, you’ll _suffer_.”

Neil snarls at her, doesn’t care when Wymack steps forward as if to defend the nurse. “I already suffered! What could be worse than letting someone do whatever they want to me while I can’t do anything? I can’t make a choice! I can’t do anything for myself! Why would I want someone around me when I’m like that?”

He shakes his head and steps away from her before he does something he regrets. “I’ll figure it out myself. I don’t want your help,” he says. 

It only feels slightly good when Abby turns into Wymack’s embrace as he goes up the stairs to his room.

-

Later, someone knocks on his door. Neil knows it’s not Abby—she wouldn’t bother him again after what he said to her. Unsurprisingly, it’s Wymack at the door when he calls out for them to come in.

The Beta is quiet for a while, surveying Neil curled up in his bed with the covers a messy nest around him.

“You have every right to be upset,” Wymack says slowly.

“I know.”

“But that doesn’t mean you should lash out at Abby. She’s trying her best, same as any of us.” He sounds tired.

Wymack doesn’t get it. How could he? He doesn’t know what Neil’s been through, not fully. He doesn’t know how Neil can associate Abby with bad things. Same as Kevin. Although he’s forgiven Kevin, mostly. Probably. 

“I think you should see our resident psychiatrist tomorrow,” Wymack continues. “You haven’t met her yet, but she works with our clients who need extra support.”

Neil sits up. “You think I’m crazy?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“As good as!”

Wymack sighs. “Neil. I’m not saying you’re crazy. I’m saying I think you need some extra help that we can’t give you. I think talking to Betsy will be good for you. She knows what she’s doing. Andrew sees her once a week.”

“Really?” Neil clenches his hands in the comforter. Just because Andrew sees her, doesn’t mean Neil should. But if Andrew trusts her…

“Really. Will you give her a chance?”

“Will you leave me alone about it if I don’t?”

“Probably not.”

“Fine.”

Neil refuses to look at Wymack as he sighs again and leaves the room, shutting the door quietly after himself. He’ll go see this psychiatrist if he has to. But he’s not going to cooperate. He doesn’t want more people knowing all of his secrets, thinking they know who he is.

-

Betsy gets to the Court about an hour after it opens for the day. Neil watches her walk in and talk to a few people as she makes her way across the building. He’s sitting on the second floor and watching over the railing like he did that first day. He’s seen the Beta around before, of course. She’s at the Court a few days a week to take sessions with various people. He’s seen her but he’s never spoken to her.

Now, she pauses at her door and looks around. When she spots him at his perch, she smiles and gestures at her office. A clear invitation for Neil to come down and speak with her. He doesn’t want to, but it’s probably better to get this over with.

Her office, which Neil has never been in before, is tidy. More than tidy, really. It takes him a few moments to realize that the cleanliness has a more neurotic feel to it than just someone who likes to keep things neat. Betsy is at her desk watching him as he takes in the office.

“Hello, Neil. Is it alright if I call you that? We haven’t formally met, even though I’ve seen you in the Court.” Betsy has a smile and a neutral scent that doesn’t help Neil relax. Her hair is pulled back in a puffy bun and her glasses are halfway down her nose.

“That’s fine,” he says.

“You can call me Betsy, or Dr. Dobson if you like the formality. I won’t mind whatever you’d like to call me to get my attention.” She’s cheerful and mellow, like she really wants him to trust her. Letting him choose what name he’ll call her is just another tactic, he knows.

“Okay.” He’ll see her like Wymack wanted, but he’s not going to make it easy for her. 

She smiles and gestures for him to take a seat. “Would you like something to drink? Cocoa?” He shakes his head and she joins him by the seat he’s chosen, a pad of paper and pen in hand. She takes her time getting comfortable in her chair. “David spoke to me a bit about you, of course.”

“So you already have an opinion about me?”

“No. I don’t form opinions until I get the chance to talk to a patient, myself.”

“I’m not your patient,” Neil says quickly.

Betsy smiles again. “No, of course not. Not unless you choose to be. This is an unofficial visit, unless you choose to make it official. I’ll take notes for my own benefit, but I won’t record our session the way I would for an official visit.” She pushes her glasses up her nose with the back of her pen. “That doesn’t mean I will disclose any of the information you tell me with anyone else. I take doctor-patient confidentiality very seriously.”

Neil doesn’t know if he believes that. He’s obviously never had good experiences with doctors, and he doesn’t know if mind doctors will do any better by him. He nods though when Betsy waits for his answer.

“You seem a bit recalcitrant, Neil. Have you ever seen a psychiatrist before?” she asks, tapping her pen against the pad of paper in her lap. She taps it three times and then pauses, then three times again.

“No, never.”

“You don’t trust me?”

“Why should I?”

Another smile. “For you, trust must be earned, correct? I’ve demonstrated nothing that shows I can be trusted. Therefore, you do not trust me. It’s reasonable. A lot of my patients have a hard time trusting, at first.”

Neil refrains from repeating that he’s not her patient. She already knows how he feels about it. “It’s hard to trust with what I’ve been through,” he says instead.

Betsy writes something down. “Would you like to talk about what exactly you’ve been through? David gave me some bare bones, but thought it best for me to discuss your history with you.”

“No,” Neil says quickly, licking his lips. If Wymack didn’t tell her everything he knows about Neil, then Neil has no intention of filling her in. 

“What would you like to talk about, then? You have free reign.”

They sit in silence for a while, Betsy seemingly content to let Neil think of something to say. Neil reaches up to tug on his bottom lip and the Beta doesn’t miss the gesture, but says nothing about it.

“I’ll have a heat, soon,” Neil finally says after the silence gets to be too much. He doesn’t really want to talk about it, but he doesn’t know what else to say. It’s what’s at the forefront of his thoughts.

Betsy nods, writes. “I see. I only know what I’ve read about Omega heats or what I’ve learned from my few Omega patients. How do you feel about your upcoming heat?”

“I don’t want it.”

More writing. “Most people would find it hard to lose control of themselves in that specific way.” She looks at him. “Do you have a plan for how you’ll spend yours?”

Neil hesitates. “No, not yet. I…I’ve been thinking about it. I can’t stay here during it. There are too many people, too many Alphas.”

“So you wouldn’t feel safe?” Betsy waits until Neil nods before going on. “I know David or Abby would be happy to let you stay at their homes, or you could always come to my apartment. I know you don’t know or trust me, but it would be a safe place.”

The offer is a surprise, but Neil shakes his head quickly. “No. I don’t want to go to any of those places. I don’t want to be…”

“Vulnerable?”

“I guess. Not there. I don’t know those places. It wouldn’t be a good idea.”

Betsy taps her pen again. “But you have some idea where you do want to go? You said you’ve been thinking about it.”

“Yeah, I guess. I have to…talk to someone, first. But maybe.”

They’re quiet again for a few minutes. Neil can hear the sound of the clock ticking on the wall. He flicks his eyes to it to watch the second hand make its way.

“Was there anything else you wanted to discuss today?” Betsy asks, mild as milk.

“No.” He didn’t want to talk to her at all in the first place.

She hums. “Do you know when your heat will start?”

Now that Neil has been paying attention, he feels hotter, hungrier lately. He knows the first signs of his heat by heart. It’s hard to forget them. “Tomorrow, probably,” he says.

“Well, if you want to discuss anything when you get back, my door is always open to anyone at the Foxhole Court,” Betsy says. “Just let me know.”

“Okay.” Neil stands up and immediately goes for the door. He has zero plans of ever voluntarily coming back to talk to the Beta again.

He’s startled to see Andrew standing outside Betsy’s office when he opens the door. Andrew blinks slowly at him but doesn’t seem surprised.

“Neil,” he drawls, looking over Neil’s shoulder. “Everyone’s favorite runaway.”

“Are you busy?” Neil asks, ignoring Andrew’s sarcastic comments. He asks quietly, so Betsy can’t overhear.

“Nope.” Andrew pops his lips around the ‘p’. He waves his fingers at Betsy. “Bye, Bee. See you later.”

“Bye, Andrew. Neil,” comes the mild reply.

Neil quickly walks away, heading for the stairs and the roof access door. He knows Andrew is close behind. Neil takes a deep breath once he steps outside, trying to shake off the feeling of Betsy watching him too closely, knowing too many things about him without him having to say anything.

“Have a good time with Bee?” Andrew asks after the door is shut behind them.

“No,” Neil says. He takes his seat at the edge of the roof, legs dangling down over the side. Andrew offers a cigarette and Neil takes it, leaning in to light it before pulling away and taking a drag.

“What do you want?” Andrew sounds curious and maybe vaguely amused over Neil desperately sucking at his cigarette instead of just letting it burn by his face like usual.

“I need a favor.”

He’s silent while Neil fidgets, trying to figure out how to say what he wants, but obviously gets impatient. “Spit it out, rabbit.”

“I need you to take me somewhere no one else will be.”

Andrew inhales smoke deeply, lets it seep out in a slow cloud as he watches Neil. “Why should I?”

“I won’t be able to control myself.” Neil doesn’t need to say why. They both know why. They both heard Riko at the Banquet. “I can’t say no when I’m like that.”

“Won’t you be just as unsafe with me?”

Neil frowns. “Of course not.”

Andrew looks away. He’s silent as he finishes his cigarette, grinds the butt out on the roof and throws it off. Neil’s heart sinks in his chest. Finally, Andrew stands up.

“Pack what you need,” he says.

“Really?” Neil looks up at Andrew, unsure if he means it.

Andrew doesn’t look at him as he heads to the door. “If you’re not ready in five minutes I’m leaving without you.”

Neil scrambles up after him.

-

When Neil goes to the first floor with a duffle over his shoulder, he finds Andrew with Kevin and Wymack. He hesitates for a moment when he sees how intense they look. 

“What do you mean a whole _week_?” Kevin asks. He looks scared.

“You heard me. You’ll stay with Wymack or you’ll come with me. Do you think you can handle that?”

Kevin’s face goes pale. “No, no, I can’t, I—”

“Then shut up and listen. I’ll be back in a week. Don’t go anywhere other than here or Wymack’s. Don’t be stupid.”

“I’ll call the school, get the both of you excused from your classes,” Wymack says. He sounds so infinitely tired. “Be safe, okay?”

Andrew spots Neil awkwardly standing a few feet away. “Come on.”

Neil follows Andrew out of the Court, giving Kevin and Wymack one last look. No one else is around for him to say goodbye to, but he has a feeling Kevin will let them know why he and Andrew will suddenly be gone for a week.

“Thank you,” Neil says as he slides into the passenger seat of Andrew’s car. 

Andrew’s hands go tight around the steering wheel. “Don’t thank me, yet.”

-

They drive for about an hour, following the signs pointing towards Columbia. Neil can’t remember much of that first night, but he thinks they might be heading in the same direction as the club. They take the exit for Columbia and Andrew stops at the first grocery store the pass. 

Wordlessly, they get a shopping cart and start getting supplies. Riko had always taken care of whatever Neil needed when he was in the throes of his heat, but Neil basically knows what to get. Gatorade and bottles of water and protein bars. Things that will easily replace the burned-up calories and energy. Things he won’t have to be fully conscious to get at. 

Andrew puts mostly candy and sweets in the cart. He steers them to the frozen desserts aisle and gets three different tubs of ice cream. Neil doesn’t question him—he’s noticed Andrew has a sweet tooth and Neil isn’t going to deny him anything while he’s doing Neil this huge thing.

They put their groceries in the back of the car and Andrew takes off again. He drives away from the downtown area, into more suburban areas. Neil gets lost in the maze of streets and neighborhoods they drive through. 

He pulls into the driveway of a non-descript two-story house. The yard is a bit overgrown, but it otherwise looks normal. Not that Neil has ever spent much time in normal houses throughout his life. 

The house smells like the cousins when Andrew unlocks the front door and lets them in. It also, surprisingly, smells like Kevin. Andrew must notice the way Neil is sniffing around.

“This is our house, Nicky and Aaron and me. We come here after nights out at the club. Kevin sleeps in the den.” He goes through to the kitchen and starts putting the groceries away. He leaves Neil’s supplies in a few bags on the side. 

Neil stands in the doorway and watches Andrew move around the kitchen. There’s sweat gathering at Neil’s neckline and under his arms and he can’t take his eyes off of Andrew.

“It’ll start soon,” Andrew says with his back to Neil.

“Yes.”

“Then come on. I’ll show you where you’ll stay.”

Andrew goes up the stairs and down the hall to the last room. When he opens it and steps to the side for Neil to go in, Neil smells Andrew everywhere. His room, then. Not Aaron’s or Nicky’s. It’s a surprise.

“You don’t have to give up your room. I can—”

“Don’t worry about it,” Andrew cuts him off with. “There’s a lock on the inside of the door. The rest of the rooms don’t have good ones.”

Neil looks around at Andrew’s room. It’s mostly bare other than the books stacked up on the desk and in small piles on the floor. The bed is unmade. Neil stands next to it and then looks back at Andrew in the doorway. The bags of his supplies are already inside the room.

“You promise you’ll stay?” Neil finds himself asking, even though he hates himself for it. He hates how vulnerable he feels. “You won’t let anyone in?”

Andrew’s eyes finally meet his. They’re intense. Steady. “I promise.”

-

Neil’s heat wakes in the middle of the night. He bolts up and stumbles out of bed, going to the door and locking it the way Andrew showed him earlier. He hears movement in the room next door, but Neil can’t focus on that. All he can think about is the low ache building in his gut. It hasn’t really been _that_ long since he last felt it, but something about it feels worse, this time.

He falls back into bed and curls up in the corner where he’s amassed a pile of pillows and blankets and sheets. Everything smells like Andrew and when he presses his face into the scent, his body relaxes. It’s almost like he’s being surrounded by an Alpha.

His whole body shudders as a cramp starts in his abdomen and builds. It hurts, aches, and Neil hates it. Usually, Riko would be here by now, would have made it so Neil doesn’t have to think about anything or feel anything anymore.

He’s too aware. He’s not sinking into that soft, hazy place he always goes to. Neil can’t get away from what his body’s feeling and he panics. His shorts are already a mess and he’s so hard it hurts but he doesn’t want to touch himself, doesn’t want to acknowledge what’s going on.

It hurts and hurts and hurts until Neil gives in and takes himself in hand. He shudders, breath punched out of his chest at the touch. It’s good, and he gets off quickly, but it’s not _enough_. He aches at the core of his body, knows this isn’t going to be manageable by himself and cries.

-

Time passes. Neil’s not sure how much. He’s so aware of his own body, of the pain he’s going through, how awful this heat is compared to any of his other ones, but everything outside of himself feels like a blur. 

He feels like he’s burning up, body spiraling between being on fire and shuddering from the cold. The cramps twist him up with pain and getting off doesn’t make anything better. He _aches_ for what he’s missing, even though he tells himself he doesn’t need it. The small voice in his head that he tries never to listen to tells him he needs his Alpha, any Alpha, to claim him and mate him and knot him. Take away the pain by filling him with something better.

The bed is a mess and Neil pushes away from it, somehow makes his way to the door. There’s a complicated lock that he fumbles at, but he manages to get it undone after a few painstaking minutes. His concentration is shot for anything other than his heat. He tries to push the door open, but something is blocking it, keeping it shut.

With a cry, Neil falls to the floor, pressing against the door. He inhales and _there_ , that scent. His mind latches onto it with a fervor.

“Andrew,” he whines, head pressed against the door so hard it hurts. Everything hurts. “ _Andrew_ , let me out, _please_.” He hits his hand against the door weakly, but it stays closed. “Please,” he begs.

He can smell Andrew, knows he’s right outside the door. There’s an Alpha there, and his entire body cries out. Why is he in here, locked away, when an Alpha is outside, just waiting for him? He should be out _there_.

“I need you,” he whispers to the door. “I need you, you have to help me. I’ll die without you.” He doesn’t really know what he’s saying, just knows he has to convince the Alpha to come in and take him. It’s the only way he’ll survive his heat, the only way the ache will go away.

“Andrew…” 

He bangs weakly on the door but no one answers.


	10. Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heat week pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey y'all! i'm glad i got this done today so you wouldn't have to wait until tomorrow. i swear it'll make sense why i made this its own chapter instead of smooshing the last one and this together. sorry they're both shorter than usual, but hopefully them coming out on the same day makes up for it?? anyway, the warnings/spoilers contain MAJOR spoilers if you don't want to read them, please skip!
> 
> chapter warning/ **SPOILERS** : graphic violence, implied rape, character death
> 
> hopefully this chapter is okay and takes care of that sort-of cliffhanger from the previous one. i'm very excited to be mostly done with this--can't wait for you guys to find out what's next! as always, thanks for reading, and i hope you enjoy

There’s nowhere Andrew wants to be less than the house in Columbia, right now. He would take classes at 9 am or Kevin’s obnoxious obsession with soccer, or Wymack’s threatened charity marathons over this if he could. 

Only Andrew, Neil and Kevin had heard when Riko whispered to him at the Banquet. None of them had told the others, as far as Andrew knew. Maybe Neil told Wymack or Abby, Andrew doesn’t know or care. It’s all he’s been able to think about since they were dropped off at the dorms. That and the seemingly permanent blank look on Neil’s face now. He hadn’t reacted to Dan or Matt’s concern, to Allison’s prying. Not even to Andrew’s hand on the back of his neck, not really.

He’d almost said no to Neil’s request. What the fuck did he know about keeping an Omega safe during a heat? Besides, he was an Alpha, and it was just a stupid fucking idea to have an Alpha around an Omega when they were so vulnerable.

But Neil had looked at him like Andrew was his last choice. His only one, really. Andrew couldn’t say no to that, couldn’t make Neil suffer this on his own somewhere else. The house in Columbia was the only safe, private place for them to go. It was the only good answer.

His skin crawls every time he thinks about the Omega locked away in his room, right now. He’d woken up as soon as Neil had started stumbling around the room, and he could smell the faintest stirrings of his heat. It made Andrew’s stomach turn.

In all his years, through all the fucked-up shit he’s seen and experienced, an Omega’s heat is not one of them. That girl at the group home had presumably been taken somewhere else for hers, so none of them had to put up with it. He’s never smelled something quite like it, sweet like a slightly over-ripe fruit, with a hint of something sour at the edge.

Neil is mostly quiet for the first few days, even though Andrew knows what he’s doing. It’d be hard _not_ to know. The whole top floor smells like spunk and Neil’s heat, getting stronger as time goes by. Andrew responds to it, can’t help himself really, and that disgusts him more than anything else. That he can’t control his body’s reactions to this. He shouldn’t be dragged down by his baser needs like this.

He’s spent long enough out of control of himself; unable to stop his reactions due to his medication, unable to stop the things his body did because of other people. He won’t let himself do anything he doesn’t want, not with the promise he made Neil.

Andrew promised he wouldn’t let anyone in and he always keeps his promises.

As much as he promises himself he’s not going to do anything, it’s hard. Harder than anything he’s ever done. Neil smells fucking _ripe_ and when Andrew isn’t paying attention, he finds himself drawing closer to his bedroom door, tempted to go in. He knows better, though. Anything Neil asked him to do in this state wouldn’t be true consent. The Omega is out of his mind. Andrew knows better.

This wasn’t a good idea. Matt should be here, or Nicky. Someone who can control themselves better and not be affected by Neil’s pheromones. A Beta would be so much better than him at keeping Neil safe.

Eventually, as he suspected would happen, Neil figures out he can get _out_ of the room. Andrew is ready for him, though. He’s sitting outside of his own room, back pressed against the door when Neil starts to rattle the handle.

“Andrew,” Neil sobs out, trying to push the door open.

Andrew’s skin crawls at the need in Neil’s voice, the desperation. His smell is bad enough, but hearing him like this is even worse. He says nothing, knows if he engages it’ll only be worse for both of them.

“ _Please_ ,” he hears whispered through the door.

The word pushes him out of his stupor and he stretches his legs out so his feet are braced against the wall, just in case Neil summons the strength to push on the door. He doesn’t think it’ll happen—Neil’s voice is raspy and there’s a thread of exhaustion in it.

Andrew remembers doing this for his brother. Or something very like it, anyway. He’d locked Aaron in the bathroom while he detoxed. Andrew had sat outside that door to make sure his twin couldn’t get out, just like this one. Aaron had been much stronger in the beginning, had screamed and raged and thrown himself against the door to be let out. He’d only quieted once his withdrawal symptoms got too bad. 

He has done this before, and his will won out then. It will win out here, now.

The next few days are hell, but Andrew spends them parked outside his bedroom door to keep Neil in. He can smell what Neil is doing even better, has the added benefit of being able to smell it, too. It drives him nearly crazy with want. 

He thinks about the way Neil looks, now that he’s filled out a bit. Now he doesn’t have bruises and his wounds are healed. His eyes are wide and bright and his hair looks like fire when the setting sun catches it on the rooftop. Neil is still just as lean as he was before, but he’s got a runner’s build instead of a starved waif, since he spends so much time on the treadmill. There are scars all over him, but they don’t wear him. He’s never seen the ones below the Omega’s clothes, but they’re probably just as bad as the rest. Andrew doesn’t think they’d make him any less attractive. 

Thinking about Neil’s body under his clothes is a dangerous idea. It makes Andrew want to open the door and find out what’s really there. Fantasizing about Neil is fine in his own private down time. Doing it now with Neil a foot away and smelling like a ripe peach is tantamount to giving in.

It’s easier when he focuses on other things. His cell buzzes almost constantly with updates from the other Foxes, questions about Neil’s wellbeing and a few about his own from Nicky. Andrew has his charger and a bottle of scotch within grabbing distance and he resupplies when he hears Neil pass out on the other side of the door. He doesn’t answer the others very often other than to tell them to shut up and leave him alone, but he uses his phone to play games and try to stay alert or to read articles on the internet. Renee is the only one he really talks to and she talks him through apocalypse scenario after apocalypse scenario just to keep him distracted.

He’s pretty sure this is going to be the thing that drives him crazy; being trapped in this house with Neil in his room smelling the way he does, desperate the way he is. Andrew silently prides himself on his iron will and self-control, but this is pushing things to limits he never knew he had. He never wants to be tested like this again. It’s good to know he can trust himself with this, even though he never thought he would have to find out, but he still hates it. Hates Neil for putting him in this position.

On what they had guessed would be Neil’s last day of heat, Andrew feels almost delirious. He’s barely been able to sleep, jolting awake every time Neil so much as moves in the bedroom. He’s drinking more than he’s eating, so he feels a little sick to his stomach. Neil is mostly still in the bedroom, but he keeps moaning like he’s dying. Andrew nearly gags at the overwhelming stench of him.

He’s going to have to get the house fumigated once this is done; he’ll need to burn all the bedding in his room. Maybe he’ll just convince Aaron and Nicky to sell the fucking thing, be done with it at last. Andrew knows he won’t be able to come back here without thinking about this week for the rest of his life. His memory won’t let him forget a single aspect of it.

There’s a noise downstairs, like the front door opening, and Andrew frowns. No one should be here. Nicky and Aaron know better, he warned them away, and he knows Kevin would never willingly step within a hundred yards of Neil during his heat. He’d said as much before they left.

Neil is quiet behind the door, still. He must have passed out again. Andrew gets up and nearly falls against the wall with how dizzy he is. Lack of sleep or too much booze, he doesn’t know. His whole body itches for a cigarette but he ran out yesterday.

Andrew makes his way to the stairs slowly, as alert as he can be. Everything smells like Neil, so that’s no help. The front door is closed. He stops halfway down the stairs and looks around. Nothing seems out of place, but he swore he heard—

“Hey, AJ.”

Immediate dread fills Andrew up. He stands stiff, frozen in place at that voice. Nothing in him wants to turn and look, but he has to move his head, has to see. Drake, stood in the doorway between the living room and the kitchen. Andrew sees Drake standing in the doorway of his bedroom at night, again and again, can’t get the image out of his head.

Drake is grinning, arms over his chest. There’s something not quite right about his expression, though, something more than the usual malice when he’s looking at Andrew.

“Hey, baby bro,” Drake drawls. 

Andrew grips the railing and his knuckles immediately bleach white.

“A little birdie told me you’d be here,” Drake says. He steps away from the doorway and towards the stairs. He looks the exact same as the last time Andrew saw him, if not more built. “He didn’t tell me you had another prize for me.”

“What?” Andrew manages to force out. 

Drake’s grin stretches into something that might resemble a smile’s nightmare. He’s at the base of the stairs, now. How did he move that quickly? “You have an Omega,” he says. “What are you doing with an Omega? Didn’t I teach you better?”

Panic grips Andrew’s heart, squeezes painfully. _Neil_.

“I don’t know what you—”

“Cut the shit, AJ.” Drake takes a few steps up the stairs. “I can smell him, clear as day. Have you already had him? Have you knotted him? I hear you’re an Alpha, now. Never thought that would happen.”

He’s making his way up the stairs and Andrew can’t do anything, can’t move, can’t think. All he can do is stand rooted, watching Drake come closer. He’d never thought he’d have to see the Alpha ever again. That was why he left, why he went back to a family that didn’t really want him and didn’t give a shit about him, why he gave up Cass. So he’d never have to see Drake again. But here he is. In Andrew’s _house_.

Drake is one step below Andrew, now, but he’s of a height so that they’re level. He smells like excitement and glee. “You’ll let your big brother have a taste, right? I won’t forget about you, of course, but how could I resist an Omega ripe for the taking? God, you can smell him, can’t you? Have you been having fun while he’s wet for it?”

The panic in Andrew’s chest twists, turns to fury. Before he can even think about it, he puts his hands against Drake’s chest and pushes. He watches the Alpha fall down the stairs in slow motion, like it’s happening to someone else. Like it’s a scene on TV. 

For a few minutes, everything is quiet. Then, the Alpha groans and twitches at the bottom of the stairs. He sits up and looks up at Andrew, pure fury on his features. “I guess I’ll have to teach you a lesson before I knot that Omega,” he growls.

Red mist fills Andrew’s vision. He’s down the stairs without a thought, jumping onto Drake. He’s got a knife in his hand from his armband and he stabs it into his shoulder. The Alpha cries out and flips Andrew off of him and into a side table with a jerk of his legs.

The breath is knocked out of Andrew when he hits the table and breaks it with his fall. Drake gets up and he’s bleeding. The knife is still jabbed in his shoulder, but he doesn’t seem too bothered by it. Andrew takes the other one out of the arm sheath, ready. 

“This is how you treat me, huh?” Drake asks. He’s panting, clearly some sort of affected by his various wounds. “After everything I’ve done for you?”

“You didn’t do shit for me,” Andrew hears himself snarl from far away. “Get the fuck out or I’m going to kill you.”

Drake grins. His teeth are bloody. “Didn’t do anything? What are you talking about? You enjoyed everything I did to you. Don’t you remember? The way you cried out? The way your body responded to my touch? The way you ca—”

Andrew lets out an inarticulate noise of rage and lunges at Drake. It’s clearly what the Alpha wanted, but Andrew can’t help himself. He’d felt so helpless for so long, but he’s not anymore, he’s _not_ , he won’t let Drake get away with this. Won’t let him touch Neil, do what he did to Andrew to someone who can’t do _anything_ to defend himself right now.

With a snarl, Drake grabs Andrew and throws him into a wall. He’s taller and stronger, has every advantage over Andrew. But what Drake wants is to hurt Andrew. To cause pain. To lord it over Andrew that he can do what he wants. He presses in against Andrew and grins. His goal has never been to do anything other than break Andrew and make him do what he wanted. He’s never really wanted to _kill_ him before.

But Andrew is vicious and has no regard for his life. He has someone to protect, and he’s always done his best when he has to protect someone.

Drake’s eyes go wide and he looks down. The second knife is stuck out of his chest. Only the hilt is outside him. He staggers back, hands going to the knife. When he pulls it out, a spurt of blood comes out after it. Drake collapses to the ground. A pool of blood starts to spread quickly around him as he bleeds out.

Andrew slides down the wall, unable to look away from Drake. After a while, the Alpha’s chest stops moving up and down. It goes still and doesn’t move at all. He can’t look away, can’t stop seeing Drake’s body, even when he shuts his eyes. There’s blood on his hands, hot and sticky. It starts to cool down and go tacky after a while. It smells like dirty pennies. Andrew slumps over and throws up vodka and bile. 

He must sit there for longer than he expected because he startles when someone reaches out and touches his arm.

“Andrew?” Neil asks softly. His eyes are wide when Andrew looks at him. He looks like shit, smells even worse, but there’s no fresh heat-stink clinging to him anymore. It must have broken while Andrew was sitting downstairs. He’s knelt in front of Andrew, worry written all over his face and in his smell.

“It’s okay,” Andrew says, voice raw. 

Neil reaches out again and he’s got blood on his hand. Andrew doesn’t think, just panics. He grabs Neil’s hand, pulls him in to check him over.

“Did he touch you?”

“Andrew, I—a”

“Did he _touch_ you?”

“No,” Neil says quickly, obviously freaked out. “No, Andrew, no one touched me. What’s going on? Who is that?”

He must’ve checked Drake’s body to see if he was still alive and got blood on his hand. Fuck. Andrew’s heart stops pounding so furiously and he breathes out, all the adrenaline spent. He can hear sirens in the distance and he wonders vaguely if Neil called the police, or if maybe the neighbors saw someone sneak into the house and heard the fight. 

Neil stays next to him as the cops pull up and crash their way into the house. They have their weapons drawn and they all shout once they see Drake’s body on the floor and Andrew and Neil next to the wall.

“Don’t move!” one cop shouts. He’s looking between Drake and Andrew who has the blood on his hands. He must not be nose-dead, because he inhales deeply and lowers his gun. “Captain!”

Another cop in a suit walks in the door, brushes past the two uniforms in the room with their guns still out. “What?” 

The cop nods at Neil and Andrew. “An Omega was in heat in the house. I think maybe this Alpha attacked them. Might’ve been self-defense.”

The suit takes in the scene. “You’d be able to smell it better than I can,” he says gruffly. A Beta, then. He comes over to them and Andrew growls when he gets too close to Neil. “Whoa there,” the cop says, hands up. “I’m not going to do anything. Is Sanders right? Was this self-defense?”

“I’m not mated,” Neil blurts out. “Andrew was keeping me safe during my heat. I don’t know who that is. I came down when I heard fighting.”

Suit looks at Andrew. “Well?”

Andrew licks his bottom lip and considers his options. This is a good way to keep them out of trouble. He can see Neil nervously edging away from the cop. He’s itching to put Neil behind him so no one can look at him; leftover instincts from how messed up Neil’s heat has made him.

It’ll get back to these cops, who Drake is, once they run his fingerprints. As a Marine, he’s in a database somewhere. So is Andrew. Better to get that out of the way, now, then.

“He was a foster brother of mine,” Andrew says. Neil’s head whips to him and he stares. “Drake Spear. He said someone told him where I was. When he smelled Neil, he said he was going to rape him, then me. We fought.”

The suit looks back at Drake’s body. “You had knives?”

“It’s an open-carry state.”

“Okay. Self-defense or defense of an Omega or not, we’re going to have to book you. C’mon, kid.”

Andrew puts up with the cop’s hands on him, the handcuffs that restrain him. He’s searched for other knives, but he doesn’t have any more. Neil looks close to a panic attack to the side.

“Andrew, what—”

“Call Wymack. Tell him to come to the precinct. He’ll know who to call.”

Neil nods and Andrew is led away to the waiting cop car. The sight is, unfortunately, an all-too-familiar one.

-

Andrew has his head against the interrogation room table. His right hand is still cuffed and attached to the ring in the middle of the table, but he doesn’t care. He’s too tired to care. His whole body hurts from the fight and he’s beyond exhausted. It’s been a hellish week that’s only gotten worse, fucking somehow.

A different suit comes in to question him about Drake. Andrew is candid about Drake’s treatment of him when Andrew still lived with Cass. There’s no point in keeping it secret, not if it’ll prove a history and intent that will keep Neil safe. Andrew knows the laws—Alphas can get away with a lot if it’s in defense of an Omega, mated or not. Rape of an unmated Omega is a big deal, if it’s a random attack. Someone like Riko would never go down for it, especially if he had a contract with Neil’s name on it, but Drake definitely will. Not for what he did to Andrew, no, but what he _could_ have done to Neil.

Andrew can’t prove what Drake said to him, but he doesn’t really have to. Neil vouches for him and that’s enough for them to be satisfied that Andrew was just protecting a defenseless, vulnerable Omega from a predator.

That doesn’t mean he can just leave, though. He’s booked, eventually, and moved into a holding cell. It stinks of unwashed people and piss and the bench is horribly uncomfortable, but Andrew’s slept in worse places. He closes his eyes and doesn’t open them until someone moves to stand directly in front of the cell.

“Andrew.”

That’s a voice he hasn’t heard in a while. “Gregory.”

The defense attorney rolls his eyes, used to Andrew by now. “Good to see you’re up to your old tricks again.”

“Contrary to popular belief, I don’t actually enjoy—”

“I meant protecting people. Usually that doesn’t put bodies in the morgue, but I can get why this time it would.” Ah. He’s obviously been told the mitigating details.

Andrew sits up and turns to face the lawyer. “Am I being charged?”

“There will be a trial, because of your past. But they’re remanding you into David Wymack’s custody, since you were defending an unmated Omega when you took Drake Spear’s life.” Gregory looks at his watch and then at the guard next to him. “If you’ll release my client.” 

He’s a lawyer that works with the Foxhole Court, under Allison’s direction. He worked with Andrew when Wymack petitioned the court to get Andrew off his medication. He’s a generic looking Beta who usually smells exhausted even when he seems put together.

The guard unlocks the cell and Andrew follows his lawyer into the front of the precinct. Neil is waiting there anxiously, along with Betsy and Wymack. The Omega shoots forward as soon as Andrew is let out of the back, but hovers by Andrew’s side instead of touching him. Smart move.

“Are you okay?” he asks softly. All the vulnerability from the past week is on his face. He looks just as bad as Andrew, still smells worse than anything, and there are dark circles under his eyes. He’s obviously been at the police station for most of the time Andrew’s been here. Driven by Wymack, probably. 

“I’m fine,” Andrew says, grinning even though it isn’t funny. Nothing is funny. “Don’t I sound just like you?”

Neil tugs on his bottom lip and Andrew reaches out to grab his fingers. He squeezes once in a signal even he can’t decipher before letting go and heading over to Wymack and Betsy. 

“Guess I’m back in your custody,” he tells Wymack.

Wymack’s face is hard. “Gregory told me what happened.”

“I’m sure he did.” 

“We need to talk about this, Andrew.”

“No, I don’t think so.” Andrew looks over at Betsy. “Hey, Bee. Come all the way up here for little old me?”

The psychiatrist smiles. “I’m relieved to see you seem to be holding up. You’ll stop by for a visit tomorrow?” It’s less a question and more an order.

“Sure thing, Bee.” Andrew beckons at Neil and catches the keys Wymack throws at him. “We’ll meet you back at the Court.”

“You can’t leave the state—” Gregory starts, but Andrew waves him off.

“I know the drill. Can’t leave without telling you, you’ll call me when there’s a court date. Bye.”

He should probably stop and listen to what Gregory has to say, let Betsy talk to him and let Wymack see for himself that Andrew is okay. He doesn’t need anyone to look at him the way Wymack was looking at him. Unlike when Neil lies, he is _fine_. Drake meant nothing to him, and him being dead can only be a good thing.

Andrew finally takes a breath when he slides into the GT. The seat hasn’t been adjusted, so he assumes Betsy drove it over. She’s just as short as he is. Neil is silent in the passenger seat, but he smells concerned.

“You stink,” Andrew says. His fingers tap against the steering wheel. He wants a cigarette and his knives. Those are locked up in evidence, though.

“I know.” 

Neil is staring at him. He can feel the Omega’s eyes boring into the side of his face.

“What?” he asks.

“If anyone ever calls you a monster again, I think I’ll have to kill them.”

Andrew grips the steering wheel. “Shut up.” He turns the car on and peels out of the parking lot, not giving a single shit that there are so many cops around.

He gets them back to Palmetto in record time.


	11. Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Celebrations turn tragic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we are y'all! the home stretch! as you might have noticed, i've added "out of 12" to the chapter index. i'm PRETTY sure the next chapter will be the last one, but if it's too long it'll be split into two. i doubt that'll be a problem, though. also, i just sort of realized we're like 80k+ in and all neil and andrew have done is hold hands, so i think this is officially a "slow burn" fic, right? hahaha
> 
> warnings/spoilers: dealing with the mental trauma of The Drake Situation, some sexytime shenanigans (really pg-13 stuff, don't get too excited), a pretty big cliffhanger? sorry y'all
> 
> the next chapter should either be up tomorrow or the day after, depending on how quickly i can type it up. i'm writing down the chapter notes now and it's going to also have some fun warnings. as always, i hope you enjoy! thanks for reading!

There’s a flurry of activity as soon as they step foot in the Court. Nicky is hovering anxiously, seemingly unsure who he should fret over first. Andrew narrows his eyes and the Beta decides Neil is his best bet. Matt and Dan follow suit, pulling Neil in and asking him how he’s doing. Allison reaches out to ruffle his hair and offers him silent companionship.

Renee sidles up to Andrew and touches his elbow when Andrew doesn’t walk away. “Are you okay?” she asks quietly. She doesn’t sound all sugar and spice, so he must be speaking to the thing under her skin.

“Why wouldn’t I be.”

“Wymack got a frantic call from Neil this morning about you being arrested for murder.” She’s watching Neil being surrounded by the more taciturn members of the Foxes, but she doesn’t move from Andrew’s side. It’s nice to know he has an ally who sees the important things in life.

Andrew rolls his shoulders. All of his stuff is back at the house in Columbia. It’s probably still a crime scene. The only thing he has is his cellphone and his keys. Neil doesn’t even have that.

“I was just doing what I promised,” he says blandly.

Renee finally looks at him. “I’m sure Neil didn’t mean for you to kill for him.”

“Wasn’t just for him.” He doesn’t say that Neil, out of everyone Andrew has ever made a deal with, understands completely what Andrew means when he promises someone his protection. The lengths he’ll go to to keep them safe. He’s killed before. 

Tilda’s death didn’t mean much to Andrew. He wasn’t doing it for himself at all. He didn’t care about Tilda, didn’t care that she’d thrown him away. The past was the past, and neither of them could change it. He cared what she was doing to Aaron, what she could continue to do to him. 

With Drake, when he lets himself think about the actual life he’s taken and not just the concept of taking one, there’s a sense of slight satisfaction. What Drake did to him…Andrew will never be able to forget it. He still wakes up from nightmares of it. His perfect memory makes him relive things that would make most people wish for death. Knowing he’s the one who actually ended Drake’s life, made the world just that much safer, is…good. Especially knowing he was keeping Neil as far away from the Alpha as possible. Neil and his brother, both.

Andrew looks away from the pile of Foxes and finds his twin standing away from the rest, hands free of his cellphone for once. He’s staring right back at Andrew, jaw clenched tight. That will probably be a problem, Andrew thinks to himself. Not right now, though. He’s exhausted and needs a shower. There’s still blood under his nails that he wasn’t able to get out at the precinct.

“Kevin, we’re going,” he says. 

Kevin, who had been hovering awkwardly around Neil, unsure if he’s allowed to approach, stops and turns to Andrew. “But—”

“I really don’t have the time or patience for this, Day. Let’s go.”

He leaves without looking back. Neil is better off with the rest of the Foxes, out of Andrew’s bloody reach.

-

After a night of truly shitty sleep, Andrew goes back to the Court. He has an appointment with Betsy to get out of the way, plus Kevin was bitching about getting to talk to Neil as soon as possible. Too tired to argue, Andrew takes Kevin, his brother and Nicky along to the Court. The ride over is completely silent; even Nicky doesn’t know what to say.

Andrew leaves them as soon as they’ve parked and makes his way to Betsy’s office. She’s already there and has two mugs of cocoa in hand when he closes the door after himself.

“Hello, Andrew,” she says as she hands him his regular mug.

“Bee.” Andrew sits in his usual seat and takes a sip of cocoa. It’s ashy and tasteless, but he doesn’t make a face to let Betsy know something’s wrong. Exhaustion has taken the taste right out of the drink.

“You look tired,” Betsy says. She’s always been more observant than Andrew gives her credit for.

He shrugs and puts the mug down, uninterested in finishing it. “Long week,” he says. He missed his last session with Betsy because of Neil’s heat, so they haven’t really spoken in two weeks outside of greetings and when she met him at the police station.

“Would you like to talk about it?” 

There’s a manila file next to her pad of paper, pen and recorder on the table between them. It’s an aberration and Andrew raises his eyebrow at it. “A new technique?”

Betsy follows his gaze. “It’s a copy of your report. Your statement, notes from the detectives, and copies of the photographs they took of your injuries. It’s important for your treatment as well as your defense during the trial.”

Andrew nods. “Makes sense.” 

Nothing she would have read from his statement is news to her, of course. He’s been perfectly candid with Betsy in the course of their relationship. Andrew doesn’t lie, but he used to just scare his psychiatrists off without having to tell them the truth. Betsy is unshakable, so Andrew has given her all of his truths.

“We haven’t spoken about Drake Spear in a while,” she says. 

“Been a bit distracted.”

She puts her mug down and picks up her pad and pen. “Would you like to talk about what happened? I’ve read your statement and the officer’s reports, but that doesn’t tell me how you felt, or how you feel now.”

Andrew looks away at the wall. All he can see is Drake, standing at the bottom of the stairs; his grin as he talked about going up to Neil’s room. “Someone told him where I was. I don’t think he planned for anyone else to be at the house.”

Betsy hums. “Why do you think someone informed him of your whereabouts? Why now? Who would do that?”

He’s actually thought about that. First, he thought of pig Higgins, trying to be a do-gooder. Then, he thought of Luther and his _misunderstandings_. But really, there was only one person it _could_ be.

“Stray mutts,” he mumbles.

“I’m sorry?” Betsy’s writing pauses.

“Nothing.” 

There’s no use telling Betsy about Riko and his threats. She can’t do anything about it, and getting her involved in Moriyama business would just put her in danger. Andrew cares about so few things in this world, and Betsy is somehow one of them. He won’t do anything that could get her hurt.

“Andrew?”

“Drake was never happy about me leaving,” Andrew says. “He made that perfectly clear. I’m sure he just wanted one last go at his favorite toy.”

“But things changed when he figured out Neil was in the house?”

“Yeah. Said he couldn’t resist, that we’d have some fun after.” Andrew’s still looking at the wall, can’t bring himself to look Betsy in the eye.

“How did you feel when he threatened you?”

“I wasn’t going to let him go upstairs and do that to Neil.”

She shifts in her seat. “I don’t mean when he threatened Neil, Andrew, I mean when he threatened _you_.”

When Andrew glances over at her, she’s got her pad and pen in her lap. She’s watching him closely, concern written all over his face. He shrugs. “I froze. I couldn’t say anything, couldn’t move. It was like I was a kid all over again.”

Betsy nods. “That’s understandable. When we’re faced with our greatest fears, with the people who hurt us, it’s hard to react.”

“Then he said that shit about Neil and I went crazy,” he says, to get her away from that line of reasoning.

“Crazy?”

He shrugs again. “I don’t know. It wasn’t a conscious decision to push him down the stairs. My body moved before I could tell it what to do.”

“And after that?” 

“I had to keep him away from Neil. There was nothing else I could do. I knew what he would do if he got past me, and I couldn’t allow that.” Andrew shifts in his seat, uncomfortable with the knowledge that his body had controlled him in relation to Drake, again. After all he’d done to learn self-control.

Betsy hums. “Do you think maybe it was your instinct as an Alpha to keep Drake away from an Omega who couldn’t protect himself? You did that once before, when you got Neil away in the first place.”

Andrew grits his teeth. His _instinct_. What a banal, innocent way of saying he couldn’t stop himself from acting. “Probably,” he concedes. “That’s what the police are saying. It’s why I’m not still locked up.”

“You don’t like that?”

He looks up at her. “You know how I feel about losing control.”

Betsy nods and taps her fingers against the pad of paper. “I do. But I also think you’re angry at yourself when you did something amazing.”

“Murder is amazing, now?”

She gives him a look. “You protected someone who had no way to protect himself. Neil is here and relatively unscathed because you put yourself in the way of the bullet heading for him. That’s commendable, Andrew.”

Andrew stays silent. He doesn’t want commendation for killing Drake. He doesn’t want to be rewarded for losing his sense of self. What he did isn’t laudable, even if he’s glad he did it. 

Betsy sighs. “Would you like to end our session for today? We can pick back up during your regular appointment.”

He nods and listens as Betsy talks about her weekend and the dog she met in a park during one of her walks. The idle chatter is easy, brings him back from an edge he didn’t realize he was standing on. After a few minutes, she taps her pen against her pad of paper and then stands up. 

“I’ll see you in a few days, Andrew,” she says.

Andrew leaves.

Because he must have done something truly horrific in a past life, Aaron ambushes him before he can head for the roof. His twin looks agitated, smells the same combination of annoyed and anxious that he has since last night.

Aaron is fiddling with his phone, but he isn’t texting his secret girlfriend. “We need to talk.”

“Do we?” Andrew asks. He’s too tired for this shit, especially after a session with Betsy.

The annoyance overpowers the anxiousness and Aaron glares. “Yes.”

“Lay on, Macduff,” he says wearily.

Aaron’s face twists in confusion as he walks them to Renee’s corner, which is surprisingly free of Jesus freaks for the time being. “You didn’t tell me,” Aaron accuses as soon as they’re mostly secluded.

Andrew looks around the Court, bored of this conversation already. “Tell you what? About my less-than-picturesque childhood? You knew I was in the foster system. Why do you think I came back here? For your love and hospitality?”

Aaron winces. “I-I didn’t know. Not about _that_.”

Interesting. So he knows what Drake did. Andrew idly wonders how.

“I overheard Wymack and Abby talking, about what that bastard did to you, why you…why you killed him.”

Ah.

“So? You wanted to talk to me about?”

Aaron visibly grinds his teeth. “You were protecting Neil when you killed Drake.” Andrew doesn’t flinch at the Alpha’s name in his brother’s mouth. “Were you protecting me, when you…”

Andrew actually laughs. “Really? _That’s_ what you want to know?” His smile drops and he takes a step closer to Aaron, doesn’t miss that Aaron takes a quick step back. “You and I, we made a deal, brother mine. What you seem not to realize is that I keep my deals, even if you don’t.”

“But she wasn’t—”

“She would have killed you, either with her hands or her drugs. One way or another, you’d be dead. I told you I would protect you. I did what I had to.”

The look on Aaron’s face is funny, but Andrew just doesn’t have the energy to laugh, anymore. It’s taken him this long to confront Andrew about what happened with Tilda. That’s his fault, if he’s too stupid to understand what Andrew meant when he brokered their deal.

“Get out of my face. I don’t have the mental fortitude to deal with you right now.”

Aaron scurries away. Andrew watches him immediately raise his phone to his ear, calling his one source of comfort. Typical.

The roof is calling him, as is his need for about twenty cigarettes. There’s a fresh pack in his pocket from the dorm. Hopefully he’ll be able to smoke his way through most of them before another idiot bothers him.

Neil is out there on the edge, of course. Probably waiting for him. Speaking of idiots.

“Hey,” Neil says when Andrew drops down beside him.

Andrew waves him away and busies himself lighting a cigarette. He doesn’t bother offering Neil one.

The Omega has obviously showered himself at some point between yesterday and right now. He no longer reeks of heat-stink and sweat and come. He just smells like his normal self, with the slightest hint of nervousness. There’s a million things that could make him smell like that, though, so Andrew doesn’t worry about it.

“I wanted to say thank you. For staying with me. For not letting that Alpha…” he trails off.

“Don’t mention it. Ever.” Andrew exhales a stream of smoke and looks over the edge of the roof. He’s tired enough that his stomach clenches from the fear.

Neil huffs and scoots the slightest bit closer. “You might have the rest of them fooled, but I know you’re a good person.”

“You don’t know anything.” Andrew glances over at Neil, takes in his casual sprawl. It’s at odds with how tense and nervous he’d been since the Banquet; how terrible everything was during the last week. “You’re a pipedream,” he whispers.

Neil looks up at him. “I’m as real as I possibly can be.”

“Not real enough.”

That makes Neil smile. “You don’t have to protect me from yourself.”

His words make Andrew freeze. Is he asking to break their deal? But, no, when he replays them in his head, he scoffs. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Neil’s eyes are so wide and blue when Andrew finally meets them. “I know that I put you in a really bad situation, and you could have done a lot of things and I would have let you.”

“It wouldn’t have been real consent.”

“I know. The fact that you didn’t shows me who you really are.”

Andrew puts his cigarette out and flicks the butt over the side of the building. He doesn’t give a shit where it lands. All he can focus on is Neil, sitting far too close, looking up at Andrew like Andrew means a damn thing to him. Everything is out on his face, as easy to read as a book. 

“Yes or no?” Andrew hears himself asking.

Neil doesn’t blink. “Yes.”

The kiss is slow, sweet if anything about Andrew could ever be called sweet. Neil doesn’t close his eyes and neither does Andrew. It’s just a press of mouths together. Neither of them move any closer and Neil stuffs his hands under his thighs. The gesture makes Andrew pull away.

He’s…afraid, maybe. It’s the same queasy feeling in his stomach that he gets when he’s too high up. Neil knows his boundaries better than anyone Andrew has ever met, actually respects them, and that frightens Andrew. It’s stupid.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he says, pushing Neil’s face away. The Omega is still smiling like Andrew’s done something great for him.

“Yes or no?” Neil asks, hand hovering over Andrew’s.

Andrew pulls away. “Not right now.” Neil doesn’t know what he wants, and Andrew _really_ doesn’t know what he wants to happen between them. It’s a stupid idea. They’re a stupid idea. Nothing good can come of Neil.

“Okay.” Neil puts his hand back under his thigh and watches Andrew get up and head for the door. He doesn’t try to stop Andrew at all, and that’s enough to make Andrew more furious about this whole stupid situation.

-

Avoiding someone is easy when they live in a glorified Rec center that Andrew doesn’t actually have to spend time at if he doesn’t want. Kevin complains, frequently and loudly, but Andrew doesn’t give a single shit. There’s really no reason they need to be at the Court every day. He doesn’t need an excuse, but mid-terms are better than nothing and they remind Kevin that as much as a degree from Palmetto State University might not matter to someone like him, it matters to Andrew and everyone else.

Studying makes it easier to not think about Neil, either. Not that Andrew really does anything like studying. He just reads the assigned texts and slideshow presentations for the first time. He tends not to pay attention in class, and he’s missed quite a few even with permission, but he doesn’t need that. All he has to do is read the material and he’s fine. To everyone’s surprise, Andrew has remained on the Dean’s list since they started school.

So Andrew is too busy to think about certain Omegas and the stupid open looks on their faces when they see him. The way they know all his boundaries and respect them. He definitely isn’t thinking about pipedreams who shouldn’t be real. Not at all.

“Andrew, if you don’t take me to the Court, I’m going to call Renee,” Kevin threatens. “Midterms are over. There’s no reason I should be stuck in this fucking dorm all day. I have things to do.”

It’s a terrible threat. Renee wouldn’t make Andrew do anything, but the other Foxes seem to think she has some sort of sway over him. No one has sway over him. Not even—

“Fine,” he says. 

Kevin looks surprised and then delighted to get his way. He impatiently waits for Andrew to round up his sullen brother and exhausted cousin to take them to the Court.

Matt grins at them as they come in. “Howdy, strangers. Haven’t seen you in a while. Everything good?”

It hasn’t been _that_ long. Andrew ignores Nicky chatting with Matt and looks around. Betsy’s door is closed, so she’s either on Campus or in a session with another patient. Abby’s in her exam room doing something and Wymack’s office is dark. He’s just about to go in and look for booze when Neil steps in front of him. 

“Andrew,” he says. He smells a little frustrated, a little nervous. Mostly determined.

“Rabbit.”

Neil rolls his eyes. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

“Not particularly.” It’s not _exactly_ a lie, but Neil still sees through it.

“Can we talk?”

Fuck. He might as well get this over with. No point dragging it out. Andrew shrugs and follows Neil up the stairs to the roof. He’s been spending time on the roof of the dorms; it’s a lot higher so the swoop in Andrew’s stomach is stronger. It hasn’t felt the same without Neil’s annoying presence at his side to steal cigarettes.

Neil takes a breath once they’re both settled. The determination coming off him is potent. “If you don’t want to be with me, that’s fine,” he says. “I would never force you—”

“I don’t know what you want,” Andrew interrupts. “I don’t do relationships.”

“I’m not asking for that.” The look on Neil’s face is open and a bit vulnerable. He’s looking at Andrew like he _means_ something again.

“I’m not your answer,” Andrew says. He’s said it before, here on this very roof.

Neil smiles like he remembers it, too. “I’m not saying you are.” His response is different, just enough. 

Andrew points between them. “This is nothing.”

“I’m used to being nothing.”

 _I want nothing_. He’d said that before. He wanted nothing. If Neil is nothing, does that mean Andrew can have him? 

Neil shifts closer. He’s still smiling. “Yes or no?”

“Yes.”

Their second kiss is just as chaste as their first. Or it starts that way, anyway. Neil moves closer but he’s sitting on his hands again. Andrew grits his teeth when he sees that and then touches Neil’s bottom lip with his tongue, asking for permission. Neil seems startled, opens without realizing quite what it means. He doesn’t turn aggressive when Andrew kisses him deeper, just takes it. 

Neil makes a noise that goes straight to Andrew’s head. He pulls back and puts his hands behind Neil’s head, to cushion it as he angles him onto his back. Andrew hovers over him, doesn’t put his weight on the Omega, just watches Neil open his eyes and look back.

“Yes or no?”

“Yes, always.”

Andrew growls. “Not always. Say no if you need to.”

Neil smiles. “You won’t do something I don’t want.” He sounds confident.

“If you don’t agree, I’ll never touch you again.” It’s not coercive. Andrew _needs_ to know that Neil will tell him no, won’t let Andrew go too far. “I won’t let you make me into them.” He doesn’t know if he means his own abusers or Neil’s.

“You’re not,” Neil says softly. He moves his hands and hesitates with them by Andrew’s shoulders. When Andrew nods, he puts them there. Doesn’t squeeze or grab, just touches. “I trust you.”

Andrew closes his eyes and leans down until their foreheads touch. Not many people trust him for anything other than his violence. Betsy tells him all the time that he doesn’t wantonly hurt or destroy, no matter what Andrew thinks of himself. Hearing those three words from Neil is like a revelation.

“Yes or no?” he asks again.

“Yes, Andrew. It’s yes.”

He kisses Neil again, not gently or chastely, until Neil makes that noise of pleasure again that makes Andrew shiver. He’s never heard a noise like that, before. Not with his very few willing partners, not even when Neil was in heat and taking care of himself. It’s thready and high and seems to surprise Neil just as much as Andrew.

“Can I take your shirt off?” he asks after pulling away.

Neil licks his lips and the smell of his obvious arousal is hampered a bit by his nervousness. “I have scars,” he whispers.

“I know.”

When Neil nods, Andrew carefully takes Neil’s shirt off and then sits back to look at him. Neil’s not nearly as scrawny as he once was—he’s lean but there are muscles in his chest and torso that are slightly defined by his workouts. He might’ve lost a few pounds because of his heat, but he’s still gorgeous, skin a dark caramel that makes Andrew’s mouth water.

There are scars, but Andrew knew to expect that. He’s not expecting the amount, but he probably should have. Neil’s led a hard life. There are long marks from knives and an iron-shaped burn on his shoulder and rough patches maybe from falling against the ground. There’s the distinctive shape of a bullet scar, and the thick, ropey scar from his surgery over his abdomen. 

None of it makes Neil ugly. They’re all marks of his survival. Wordlessly, Andrew pulls one of his armbands down so Neil can see the crisscross of his own white scars. Neil takes them in with wide eyes that turn almost liquid when he looks back at Andrew.

“Thank you,” he whispers. “For showing me. Will you take your shirt off, too?”

Andrew pulls the armband back up as he thinks. “No,” he says. “Not now.” He’s _better_ a sex than he used to be, but this is too new. Neil already out of his comfort zone, already something he doesn’t know. He can’t be that vulnerable. “You can touch my shoulders or my hair. Don’t pull.”

Neil nods and keeps his hands where Andrew put them.

The sun is high in the sky so when Neil throws his head back from a gasp, his hair looks like it’s on fire. Andrew looks up from mouthing at Neil’s chest and takes in his beauty. He’s stunning, something Andrew would never say aloud. Neil had looked great in his Banquet suit and he looks even better half-dressed and wanton.

Andrew pauses with his hands on the button of Neil’s jeans. “Yes or no?”

“Yes, Andrew, pl—”

“I don’t like that word,” Andrew says quickly. He unbuttons Neil’s jeans and pulls down the zipper. “Don’t say it.” 

“Okay, I won’t, I won’t.” Neil’s breath is labored and he’s squirming against the rooftop. Andrew’s sure it doesn’t feel good against his exposed back, but he isn’t complaining.

He’s satisfyingly hard in his boxers and Andrew doesn’t bother pulling them down. Just shoves hand past his waistband and grips his cock. Neil makes another one of those desperate, needy noises. The smell of his arousal is only cut because they’re outside, but it’s still sweet in Andrew’s nose.

Neil’s hips buck up into his grip and Andrew uses his other arm to hold him against the roof. “Don’t move,” he growls. Neil whimpers an ascent, but Andrew can still feel him trying to get more of Andrew’s touch. Thinking that maybe this is the first time anyone’s ever focused on Neil’s pleasure is enough to ground him, for now.

He jerks Neil off, quick and rough. He doesn’t know how to be delicate about this. Neil doesn’t seem to mind, if the near-constant whines and moans are anything to go by. He comes quickly, coating Andrew’s hand and the inside of his boxers.

“Andrew,” Neil gasps out. His breathing is ragged and Andrew watches his chest go up and down quickly as he comes down.

“Don’t move,” Andrew says again. Neil nods and looks up at him with wide eyes. His cheeks are flushed and the flush runs all the way down his chest. Andrew looks at that, at his peaked nipples and the sweat sliding down his ribs. He shoves his wet hand down his pants and jerks himself off. He’s less delicate than he was with Neil, but it’s enough. He comes with a short grunt. 

After, he has to put distance between them. Neil doesn’t move from his spot sprawled on the roof and Andrew gets to his feet, walks closer to the door as he wipes his hand on his jeans. He won’t leave; it’s not that bad. He wanted this, wanted _Neil_. He just can’t be touched.

There’s silence between them for a few minutes. Neil sits up and looks at him, runs a hand through his curls. It doesn’t help. He still looks freshly rumpled. There’s a red mark next to his left nipple that Andrew hadn’t realized he’d made. He doesn’t do up his flies, just watches Andrew.

“Okay?” Neil asks.

Andrew looks at him, takes in his own state. Sated for the first time in a long time. He hasn’t been with Roland in a long time. His body feels relaxed from his orgasm. It wasn’t horrible, Neil didn’t push. He listened.

“Okay,” he says.

-

They fall into…something, as the weeks pass. Andrew would never call it a relationship. They go up to the roof and sometimes between cigarettes they’ll kiss and sometimes they’ll do more. Andrew still isn’t comfortable doing anything more than using his hand, even though he might want something more. He hasn’t let Neil touch him other than kisses to his neck, either.

“I hate you,” he says after a particularly exuberant bout of wall sex.

Neil grins. “I know.”

“Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you.” Andrew lights a cigarette and has to stifle a laugh at the way Neil’s eyes go wide at the implication.

None of the other Foxes seem to notice other than Renee. She’s not nose-dead, though, so that’s not a surprise. Andrew and Neil stink of each other more often than not. It can only be covered so much by cigarette smoke. She smiles at Andrew in soft understanding while they’re sparring and Andrew uses the distraction to sweep her feet out from under her. Renee’s laugh tells him she let him have the point.

Andrew’s with him when Wymack and Abby corner Neil about his future.

“You can stay here as long as you want, of course, but you should start thinking beyond the Court. The paperwork went through for you to be treated by our clinic, so Abby has suppressants for you.” 

“That means you won’t have to have any heat you don’t want,” Abby chimes in. “If you ever want it again, you can go off the suppressants. It also includes a birth control, just in case anything happens.” She sounds happy and hopeful.

Neil, wide-eyed, hesitates. “They’ll work even though I’ve had heats already?”

“Of course. Heats are inconvenient and things are slowly changing in our society. If an Omega doesn’t want to have a heat, they don’t have to. The suppressants work like the birth control does—they make you body think you’re already pregnant, so it doesn’t need to trigger a heat,” Abby explains.

“Thank you,” Neil says softly. “Thank you.”

Andrew pretends he doesn’t see the way Abby’s eyes mist up.

“I also want you to think about enrolling at Palmetto State University. They’ve got a lot of options for majors. You can do anything that catches your interest,” Wymack says, giving Abby time to collect herself.

Neil tugs at the bottom of his shirt. “I didn’t graduate high school. I stopped when Riko took me.” He looks over at where Kevin is sitting reading a book and trying not to look like he wants to be part of their conversation. “Kevin tutored me for a while, but I don’t have a diploma.”

Wymack nods. “We’ve got a GED program set up here through one of the local high schools. You can do that and once you’re done, you can apply for PSU. I can help you work on scholarships when we aren’t working on your emancipation case.” Wymack had been working tirelessly with Allison on how to void an Omega contract for weeks.

“Why are you doing this?” Neil asks warily. “Why go through all this trouble for me?”

“Because you’re a person and you deserve it,” Wymack says immediately. He wraps an arm around Abby and pulls her in. “You’ve had a shitty life and there’s nothing I can do to change that. But I can do this. I can help give you a future. That’s what I’m here for.”

Andrew has to pretend he doesn’t see Neil misting up, now. 

“Okay,” Neil says. His voice is small.

Wymack’s eyes are soft when he looks at Neil. “Of course, son.”

Andrew still has classes to attend. The term is nearly up, but he can’t afford to fail anything, not on his scholarship. When he’s at the Court, he idly watches Aaron grit his way through helping Neil with science for the GED program. Matt is happier to help tutor Neil in the things he needs that aren’t math, since Neil is weirdly great at that. Even Kevin does his part in lecturing Neil and Andrew nearly to tears about history.

Neil also starts to tentatively join Matt’s book club with the various kids who come to the Court. The kids are as curious about Neil as he is about them. There’s always the faint scent of sadness and regret around Neil after he’s done with them for the day, but that gets less and less evident the longer he does it.

There’s no reason to force himself, and Andrew tells him that repeatedly, but Neil gets stubborn about the stupidest things sometimes.

“I’m fine,” he says, rolling his eyes when Andrew growls. Andrew _hates_ those words. “I mean it. I like working with the kids here. They’re nice.”

The kids that frequent the Court are little hellions, but Andrew doesn’t say that. Matt would probably hear him and get all protective mama bear on him, which is just a bother. Several of the kids have decided Neil is the best thing they’ve ever seen and they crawl all over him when they’re there. They’re warier of Andrew, who finds himself observing Neil more than anything else, but that’s what he prefers.

“You could help read a story,” Matt says gently. There’s a little girl in a Babybjörn strapped to his chest that’s drooling everywhere. 

“Hard pass.”

The Beta just laughs.

He hates to say it, but things feel relatively normal. 

“I’m trying to have a normal life,” Neil tells him one day while they’re smoking on the roof. They’d kissed a few times, but nothing further. Neil seemed agitated over something. “I’m not sure how that happens, but it’d be nice, wouldn’t it?”

Andrew says nothing in return. Just continues to gaze out at Renee’s ever-growing vegetable garden. He doesn’t know what normal is, either. He knows most people would say a mate and a couple kids, a job and a house. Andrew doesn’t know if that’s normal. Neil’s parents obviously had that, and look how Neil turned out. Lots of Andrew’s foster families were like that, and they weren’t normal, either.

Finals come sooner than Andrew would like. He doesn’t study or spend time away from the Court. He’s more content to sit on the roof with Neil and listen while Neil reads aloud from his textbooks. He’ll remember the material either way, and it keeps Neil from talking about stupid shit.

The girls are more frantic because it’s their last semester of college. They’ll be graduating once finals are in and grades are calculated. Kevin is a junior, but that doesn’t make him any more or less manic than usual. Andrew, Nicky and Aaron still have two more years before they need to worry about graduation.

“Oh my god, just kill me,” Nicky says after his last final. He’s flopped on one of the couches in the lounge, hand over his face dramatically.

Andrew, who’s been done for two days, takes out one of his new knives casually. “That can be arranged.”

Nicky peeks at him from under his hand and then sits up with a yelp. “Andrew! That’s not funny!”

“Depends on who you ask.” 

“Can we go to Columbia tonight? I deserve it after all the hell I’ve been put through this week.” Nicky flops back onto the couch once Andrew has put his knife away. 

Andrew spots Neil coming out of Betsy’s office. He’s been to see her a few times, even though it’s like pulling teeth, apparently. “Hey, rabbit, do you want to go to Eden’s tonight?” If Neil doesn’t want to go, Andrew isn’t really interested. 

“Fuck, yes,” Kevin says, taking the seat next to Nicky. “I need a lot more vodka.”

Neil rolls his eyes and comes over to perch on the armrest to Andrew’s seat. “That’s fine. Can I ask everyone else to come with?”

Nicky and Kevin go silent, looking at each other and then at Andrew. They both know what happened the last time some of the other Foxes were brought to Eden’s Twilight, even if Kevin wasn’t there for it. 

“You can ask, but I doubt they’ll want to,” Andrew says.

“What!” Nicky’s mouth is hanging wide open.

“Okay, I’ll go ask them.” He looks down at Andrew like he wants to kiss him. Andrew would be tempted if it didn’t mean Nicky would lose his absolute shit forever. Neil gets up and walks away before they can do something that will kill his cousin for good.

“Are you really letting them come?” Kevin asks when Neil’s out of earshot. He smells nervous, like the other Foxes will do something.

Andrew shrugs. “Why not? If they want to come, I’m not going to stop them.” He doesn’t care if they want to go to Eden’s. It’s not like he’ll have to talk to them.

Nicky looks cautiously hopeful at the prospect of the rest of the group joining them, but also vaguely horrified as well. Andrew snorts and goes back to his book.

-

“Remind me why _they’re_ going to Eden’s with us again?” Aaron asks, pointing rudely to Allison, Renee, Matt and Dan waiting for them at the edge of the sidewalk. 

“Remind me why you’re coming?” Andrew says back.

Kevin pushes at Nicky until he squawks and gets out of the car, drawing the others’ attention. 

“Hey!” Dan says with a grin. She’s in a low-cut dress that’s skin tight. “Thanks for inviting us.”

Andrew watches Nicky walk over for two VIP parking passes, one of which he gives to Allison and the other he takes to Andrew’s car. Allison has opted for a black bra and harness that lines her torso with straps. They both drive away and Andrew looks back at Dan.

“Whatever.”

Dan rolls her eyes and grabs Matt’s hand. “Nice.”

Renee waits until both groups are together to reach out and touch Neil’s hand. “I think we’ll have a splendid night out.”

“You don’t even drink,” Aaron sneers.

“I don’t have to drink to have fun.”

Andrew doesn’t care for all the small talk, so he walks up to the doormen, Neil at his side. They’re let in with no fuss and Andrew ignores the doormen giving Aaron a fist bump. Inside, the music is thumping so loudly he can feel it in his bones. It’s not too crowded for a Friday and they have a few hours until last call to get amazingly drunk. He leads Neil over to the bar while Aaron and Renee go for tables. Matt and Dan follow him.

Roland looks at all of them with raised brows when he finally gets to them. “New friends?” he asks. He’s eyeing Neil with far too much interest. “Haven’t seen you before.”

“Eyes off,” Andrew growls. “He’ll have water.”

“Easy,” Roland says with a laugh. He pulls out a tray and starts to make their order with deft hands. Usually, Andrew would watch with some interest, but right now Andrew is looking at the lights reflecting in Neil’s hair. “Guess I won’t see you later?” Roland asks as he slides the tray over.

Andrew rolls his eyes and takes the tray. Neil walks in front of him, but people instinctually step out of Andrew’s way without Neil acting like a bouncer. Dan and Matt stay behind to put their own orders in.

The drinks get split up between the four of them while Neil sips at his water and looks around curiously. He hadn’t seemed freaked out about going back to Eden when Andrew talked to him about it earlier in private. Even though it’s where they met and where Neil last had to deal with Riko and his Ravens, the club doesn’t seem to scare him. He smells a bit nervous, but that’s reasonable with how many people are packed in around them.

Matt and Dan show up with their own tray of drinks when Nicky and Allison return from parking their cars. Nicky cheers and tosses back two shots in rapid fire. Allison sips at hers more demurely, but Andrew’s seen her put back a bottle of fireball without breaking a sweat before. He’s not fooled.

It doesn’t take long before people are buzzed enough to go dance. Matt and Dan go off hand-in-hand. Allison swings a laughing Renee out of her seat and the two of them head to the dance floor. Andrew mentally tallies himself in the winning over the speculation of their budding relationship. Nicky shepherds Aaron and Kevin out as well, leaving Neil and Andrew alone at the table.

Neil looks at Andrew with his eyebrows raised. “I’m surprised you let me invite them.”

“It’s a free world,” Andrew says.

“Sure.” Neil leans in towards Andrew and waits until he gets a grunted _yes_ to put his head on Andrew’s shoulder. “Thanks, either way.”

Andrew shrugs, but not enough to dislodge Neil’s head. He takes another drink and watches the shapes of people on the dance floor.

The others come back to the table for drinks every now and then, but none of them comment on their position. Allison narrows her eyes and looks between them, but she doesn’t say anything; just points at Neil like he has explaining to do later. Andrew will let the Omega have fun with that reveal.

After an hour or so, Neil sits up. “I have to use the restroom.”

Andrew looks at him. “Do you need an escort?”

Neil makes a face. “No. I even remember where it is. I’ll be fine.” He stands up and takes a step away from the table, then pauses. He turns back to face Andrew. “Hey. I just wanted to say thank you, again. For everything.” He reaches up to tug on his bottom lip, a nervous gesture Andrew hasn’t seen in a while. “You’ve been fantastic.”

He walks away then and Andrew watches him all the way until he’s lost in the crowd somewhere around the bathrooms. Andrew frowns and goes over what Neil said. It sits weird in the pit of his stomach. It sounds almost like a—

The lights go out and several people start to scream.

Andrew is out of his seat in an instant. He pushes past people and into the dance floor. He’s not sure where anyone is, can’t see anything really. But he knows Aaron and Kevin are on the dance floor, Neil is somewhere near the bathrooms. He has to get them, has to make sure they’re safe.

“Andrew!” Roland is shouting, grabbing at him even though he knows Andrew hates to be touched. Andrew snarls and Roland puts his hands up. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I think I saw the others going for the back exit! Come on!”

There’s no time to ask who all is going towards the back exit. Neil has to remember it’s there, that’s how they got out when they took him from Riko. He’ll have headed there immediately; he’s a born runner, of course he knows where the exits are.

When he gets outside, he sees Aaron and Nicky immediately. Nicky is ashen and clutching onto Aaron. Dan is outside with Matt and Allison. Andrew nearly turns around and goes right back in, but then Renee comes outside with an arm through Kevin’s.

“Is that everyone?” Roland asks. He’s standing by the door, holding it open.

“Where’s Neil?” Andrew demands.

Kevin goes pale. “Wasn’t he with you?”

Light spills out of the doorway and Andrew turns around. The house lights are up and the music is turned off. There are panicked people milling around. He heads back in, ignoring the shouts from the others.

He makes a beeline to the men’s bathroom. No one is in there. No one’s in the women’s bathroom, either, so he goes in a quick circuit around the dancefloor. No Neil. When he goes to the table they were at, there’s nothing there other than their abandoned drinks and Allison’s purse. Andrew picks it up and makes his way back to the bathrooms.

Before he gets there, he sees something shiny up against the wall. It’s a phone. Andrew reaches down to pick it up without even thinking about it. It’s Neil’s, of course. Andrew remembers when Wymack brought it back from the house in Columbia. There was a small crack in the corner from when Neil dropped it soon after he got it.

There’s no password, because Neil is an idiot. Andrew swipes in and goes to the recent calls. A number with an area code he doesn’t recognize. When he goes to the texts, he sees one from another strange number. It says _Happy Summer Break, Junior_. Andrew clenches his fist around the phone. He goes back outside.

“He’s not there,” he says blankly.

“Do you think he maybe went to the cars?” Nicky asks. There are tears in his eyes.

They make their way to where the cars are. A lot of people are getting into their own vehicles and driving away, obviously too freaked by the blackout to continue partying. Neil isn’t standing by either of their cars. He’d already known Neil wouldn’t be there, but it still makes Andrew bite his lip in frustration.

“This was in his messages. Do you recognize it?” Andrew asks, thrusting Neil’s phone under Kevin’s nose. 

The Alpha is already pale, but he goes absolutely white when he reads the text. “Oh, fuck.”

Andrew narrows his eyes. “What?”

“I…this is…”

Patience completely gone, Andrew gets his hands around Kevin’s throat and slams him against the car. He ignores the shouts behind him, can’t let himself hear them. He stares into Kevin’s wide eyes. They’ve been here before, when Andrew had to choke answers out of Kevin. He’s not pleased he has to do it again.

“Where is he?” he asks, voice deadly quiet.

Kevin’s fingers scramble against his hands, trying to get him to let go. “Andrew, I—”

“Tell me or I’ll kill you.” It’s not a threat. It’s barely even a warning.

“His father used to call him Junior. And that’s a Baltimore area code.”

“What does his father have to do with anything? I thought he was dead.” He drops his hands when Kevin starts to go red in the face, but doesn’t step back. 

“Neil is a Wesninski.” The name means nothing to Andrew, but he hears Allison gasp behind them. “Nathan Wesninski, his father, is the Butcher of Baltimore. The Moriyama’s leashed killer. I found out a few days ago that he was released from prison in Seattle.” 

He hears someone say _and you didn’t tell anyone?_ from behind them, but Andrew can’t focus on that, can’t focus on anything other than what Kevin is telling him.

Andrew suddenly remembers Riko’s words from the Banquet, the summer deadline that meant nothing to him until now. 

_You’ll be coming back to me, one way or another_.

Neil was gone. He had been taken. Andrew was supposed to watch him, to keep him safe and he’d been _taken_ , right from under Andrew’s nose. A little chaos with some lights and all of Andrew’s promises were broken.

He’s gone.


	12. Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Consequences and endings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this part isn't as long as i thought it would be, even if it has a few twists i wasn't originally expecting. if it seems rushed, it...probably is. i just needed to get this out of me. it's the most i've ever written in such a short amount of time. i wanted to say thank you to everyone who has given this self-indulgent mess a chance. i really did not expect to ever post it or to continue it once i started. i really thought it might be a few thousand words at best. ninety-six thousand words later and here we are. thank you to those of you who commented on every single chapter like a goddamn champ. y'all are the real mvps.
> 
> warnings/spoilers: explicit violence, referenced/implied rape, referenced/implied childhood sexual abuse, body horror, gore, torture, character death.
> 
> thank you again for reading this. i hope you...enjoyed it? is that the right thing to say? i'm not sure when my next fic will be up. i guess watch my page. i've already got a good idea how i want it to go, so hopefully it'll be up quickly. thanks again y'all. see you soon.

Neil’s been on edge since he got the text at midnight. It’d woken him up from what was actually a fairly deep sleep, but once he’d fumbled around for his phone and actually checked it, he’d lost any sense of peace.

_Happy Summer Break, Junior_

He didn’t recognize the number, but he knew it came from someone in Baltimore. One of his father’s cohorts. From the phrasing, he assumes it’s Lola. She’s the only one with the sick sense of humor out of all of them.

Riko’s words about Neil having until the end of term had haunted him for the past few weeks. He’d been more nervous than usual, even if he was trying to keep it hidden from everyone else. He’d succeeded, obviously. Andrew hadn’t questioned him, even though he had a nose that could rival Neil’s when it came to scenting someone’s true emotions.

It’s a relief, really. Neil doesn’t want anyone to worry about this. He doesn’t think Riko is giving him an idle threat. Everyone else seems to think Riko’s more bluster than anything else, even after Seth. Even after Drake.

They haven’t discussed it, but Neil knows Riko sent Drake. There’s no one else who would. Who else had the resources to send a crazed Alpha after them, and the knowledge of when Neil would be in the middle of his heat and at his most defenseless? They don’t know what Drake’s orders were, but if Riko was waiting for Drake to kill Andrew, or at least get him out of the way, before picking Neil up, he would have been monitoring the situation very closely. He would have known Drake failed.

The text from Lola isn’t exactly a surprise. If his father really did work for the Moriyamas, that meant his father’s henchmen worked for them, too. Riko could use Lola to get at Neil, to push him over the edge and back into Riko’s hands.

Going to the club might not be the smartest idea, but it’s a good distraction. Seeing everyone happy will keep him from hyper-focusing and freaking out about something he can’t control. Riko might come after him again, probably will, but Andrew has shown that he’s willing to do anything to keep Neil safe. He’s _killed_ for Neil, something he’d only shown willing to do for the family members he’d claimed as his own.

He dresses in the outfit Andrew picks out for him and gets into the passenger seat even though Kevin grumbles about being forced in the middle in the back. Neil quietly watches the scenery pass as Andrew drives, letting Nicky’s idle chatter wash over him.

The club is fine. The rest of the Foxes get happily drunk, minus Renee, and go dancing. Neil is content to sit and lean against Andrew while the others have fun and come back every now and then for another drink.

Going to the bathroom is a little nerve-wracking, but Neil has been pushing himself to step out of his comfort zone for months, now. Going back to the bathroom alone is the only way he’ll be able to face what happened the last time he was in there, with the Raven that Andrew beat. He waves off Andrew’s offer easily.

His phone buzzes when he’s halfway there. Neil answers it with dread stirring in his stomach as he recognizes the area code.

“Hello, Junior,” Lola purrs.

Neil feels his heart clench painfully. He hasn’t heard her voice in so long, and just it is enough to make his pulse kick up. He turns, ready to go back to Andrew.

“Ah-ah, I wouldn’t,” she says. “Take one step closer and I’ll make sure your little Alpha boy-toy is the first one to die. I’ll take my time with the rest of them.”

He freezes at her words. From where he’s turned, he can just see Andrew sitting at their table, people watching with a blank look on his face that Neil recognizes as boredom. “What do you want?” he asks, voice rusty.

“There’s a door to your left. Go out it. There’s someone waiting for you there. If you don’t go to him, I’ll start picking off your little friends. Maybe I’ll start with the pretty blonde? She looks like she’ll put up a fight.”

Neil doesn’t waste any more words on her. He disconnects the call and then makes a split decision before going to the exit pointed out to him. If Andrew finds his phone, at least he’ll know that Neil didn’t go willingly. He didn’t run away like the rabbit Andrew always accuses him of being.

It won’t help anything—won’t change what’s going to happen to Neil once Lola gets her claws on him, but it’s a small comfort regardless.

He leaves Eden’s Twilight and is unsurprised to see Romero waiting for him next to a plain blue car. He does startle when someone comes out after him and wraps their arms around his waist.

“Look at you, Junior,” Lola says against his neck. “You look just like your daddy. All grown up, huh?”

Neil shudders, remembers stepping out of his baths and having Lola waiting for him, telling him how much he looked like Nathan and how excited she was to see him grow into those looks.

She inhales and then licks a trail up his neck. “Always thought it was a waste to give you to that Moriyama brat. Such a sweet thing like you. I’m sure we could’ve figured out something to do with an Omega.”

He can’t say anything.

“Let’s get him out of here. Things are about to get far livelier.”

Romero nods and gets into the front seat of the car. Lola grabs Neil’s arm in a bruising grip and pushes him into the back seat with her. 

Lola has a knife out as soon as Romero is away from the club. He takes back roads, not the highway like Neil would have expected for expediency. It’s late enough that they don’t pass anyone. 

The sight of a knife in Lola’s hand strikes fear in Neil’s chest that he hasn’t felt in a long time. He’s used to knives—Andrew wields them casually and Riko was overly fond of the things, but neither of them will ever compare to the terror Neil feels when faced with Lola Malcolm holding a knife. They don’t use them like an extension of their wills the way Lola does.

“There it is,” Lola says as she leans in. She’s staring intently at Neil’s face with a manic grin stretched over her own. “That’s the expression I haven’t been able to see in so long. It’s so unfortunate that Mary had to go and get herself killed without us, isn’t it? I’m sure you would make some exquisite expressions if you got to watch me take her apart.”

Neil’s always known what Lola does, has always been afraid of it, and he’s glad that his mom didn’t have to go through the indignity of Lola’s process. He’s sure the Moriyamas just dumped her in some unmarked grave and washed their hands of it. Lola would have taken pleasure in getting rid of her in some horrible way. At least she was spared that.

He’s not so lucky, he’s sure. After whatever happens tonight, he’s more than positive that Lola will get to take care of whatever’s left of him.

“What’s wrong, Junior?” Lola asks. “You’re so quiet. Last time I had you, you were so quick to squeal and beg.”

“Fuck you, bitch,” Neil says, voice ragged. His mouth is dry as sandpaper and the words nearly stick in his throat.

Lola laughs, delighted. “Maybe later, you flirt. First, I get to have some playtime with you until we get where we’re going.” She leans over to the front seat and does something that Neil can’t see and when she sits back, she moves so he’s caged in against the door.

He tries to stay quiet for as long as possible, but Lola is a professional. She knows exactly what to do to make him scream. Her knife goes into his hands and his arms, across his neck and his face. Nothing is bad enough to kill him or let him bleed out, but she uses her fingers and tongue to make every wound burn worse. There are more and more new lines carved into his skin, to the point he’ll probably be beyond a horror to behold.

“Boss says I have to leave you to him, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun before, right?”

What she was messing with in the front of the car turns out to be the dashboard lighter. She tears the bandage off of his cheek and replaces it with the lighter, laughing when the skin bubbles and he shrieks, clawing at her arms to try to get her to stop, even though he’s too weak to do anything. It hurts so badly, smells so strongly of burnt flesh that he gags and she pushes his head to the side as he vomits all over the back of the passenger seat. 

“It’s okay, baby,” Lola coos. She scrapes her nails over his fresh burn until he heaves again. “That tattoo was so ugly, I just wanted to make sure you know who you really belong to. It’s an improvement, I promise.”

Neil had thought maybe Riko sent her, but he knows better, now. He knows who is waiting for him at the end of this car ride. Lola would only ever call one person _boss_ , and that isn’t someone with the last name Moriyama.

He’s dizzy from blood loss and the extreme pain all over his body. It’s too much to hope he’ll bleed out before they arrive at their destination; he doesn’t have that sort of good luck. He tilts into Lola when she peels his shirt off and throws it over his vomit.

She tsks when she sees the state of his chest and back. “That brat has no sense of artistry, does he?” she says aloud. Neil isn’t sure if she’s talking to him or to the car in general. “I can’t even tell which one of these are from me, anymore.” She’s running her fingers over the various bite marks on his back that have scarred on him over the years. He knows exactly which ones are from her, but there’s no point in saying that.

Lola takes the dashboard lighter to his back, burning him with it until it gets too cold to do anything. Neil can’t even scream anymore; he’s too exhausted and in pain and his throat can’t handle it. All he can do is whimper when she throws the lighter away and goes back to her knife.

“You’re getting boring, Junior,” Lola says when she finally pulls away after a while.

Neil slumps against the door, trying to breathe. It hurts to try, everything hurts. Why can’t she just kill him?

Suddenly, there’s a syringe in Lola’s hand. She stabs it into Neil’s arm even as he tries to weakly push her away. 

“Boring boys have to take a nap,” she says. 

The panic is still making his heart beat frantically, and it must make whatever sedative is in the syringe move through his body faster. Neil’s dizziness turns to darkness and he passes out to the sight of Lola’s wicked smile.

-

“Nathaniel.” 

Neil jolts up, regardless of his body screaming at him not to move. He knows better than to ignore that sharp voice, even in his sleep. His body slumps back against a rough wall, but Neil keeps his head up. He has to keep his eyes locked onto the man crouched in front of him.

Nathan looks…older. In Neil’s memories, he always looks the same way he did the last time Neil saw him at the house in Baltimore. There’s grey in his hair and lines by his mouth that weren’t there, before. The smell of death lingering around him is the same, though. That will never change. Neither will the absolute nothingness behind his eyes. The same eyes that haunt his nightmares more than anything else.

“You really are a disappointment, aren’t you, Nathaniel?” his father asks. He’s got one elbow propped up on his knee, hand cradling his chin as he looks Neil over. “I always knew you would be, but I didn’t think you’d be this inadequate. Can’t even do the one thing your useless body was supposed to do, huh?”

There’s movement behind Nathan and Neil spots Lola and Romero standing back there. A quick look around tells him they’re in something that looks a hell of a lot like the basement in Baltimore. There’s no way they’re back there—they can’t have been in the car for that much longer after he passed out. He refuses to believe it. He’s pressed against a roughshod wall and it’s dim, light coming from one bare bulb hanging from the ceiling. His whole body is trembling from the pain of what Lola did to him in the car.

“Eyes forward,” Nathan barks.

Neil immediately looks back, can’t do anything else.

Nathan holds out his other arm and Lola steps forward to put a cleaver into his outstretched hand. It looks like the same one Neil last saw in his father’s grip. Nathan lets his arm hang down, the point of the cleaver touching the ground.

“I wanted to kill you, but I guess there are still things even someone as useless as you can do. I’m going to make sure you survive tonight, with a few modifications.” He scrapes the point of the cleaver against the concrete floor and Neil winces at the grating noise it produces.

“First, I’m going to cut off your feet,” Nathan says with no emotion in his voice, “so you can’t run. I’ll cut off your hands so you can’t hold out hope. I’ll take your eyes so you can’t look for an escape. Only then will I take your tongue so you can never lie again. “Once I’m done with you, that Moriyama brat can get his heir and you won’t be a problem for me anymore.”

He lists these horrors so dispassionately that Neil knows they’re the God’s honest truth. His father will do everything he’s saying he’ll do; he doesn’t take pleasure in torture like Lola does, but he is brutal. Neil has always known that. He has no doubt that his father won’t kill him, but he will destroy every human part of Neil that remains.

Neil doesn’t cry. He’s too numb to cry. This is a fate worse than death. He’ll be trapped in a useless body, violated beyond his imagination and unable to do anything about it. No matter how much Neil had hoped maybe he’d escaped Riko, that he could have a real life, he’d always known somehow or other he would meet his fate. He just never knew it would be so terrible. 

Nathan taps his fingers against his chin while he watches Neil panic. “Maybe I’ll be lenient. You are my only son, after all. Should I give him a break, Lola?”

“Only if he begs,” Lola says with a grin. She still has a knife out and his blood is all over her hands and clothes. He has no clue what she did to him while he was passed out. Roman is a silent presence at her side, watching Neil with a blank look on his face. He’s never talked very much, content to leave it up to his sister.

“You heard her, boy,” Nathan says, flicking his fingers at Neil. “Beg.”

He shouldn’t, but Neil really can’t help but do whatever Nathan tells him. “Please,” he says. His voice is still wrecked from screaming, it hurts to talk, but it’s the only thing he can do. “Please don’t, dad. I’m so sorry, please.”

Lola laughs. “Oh, just as good as I remember.”

Neil presses his back against the wall even though it burns against his open wounds. “I’m sorry, dad. I’m sorry. _Please_.”

Nathan tilts his head to the side. “I changed my mind. Think I’ll just stick with the plan.” He stands up, cleaver in his tight grip at his side. Nathan takes a few steps towards Neil, reaches out to grab his leg when he kicks out to try to get away. “Stay still or I’ll take more than just your feet and hands,” Nathan snarls.

He grips Neil’s leg in one hand and raises the cleaver in the other. A scraping noise somewhere in the darkness makes him pause. Nathan looks over his shoulder, cleaver poised in the air ready to come down on Neil’s foot.

“What the fuck is—”

There’s a roar of gunfire and Nathan lets go of Neil, throws himself to the side.

Neil curls up as small as he can with his arms over his head. He has no clue what’s going on, who’s shooting, but he can hear shouts. Lola is screaming something about Romero until her voice cuts out with a wet noise.

All of the noise stops, but Neil can still hear it ringing in his ears, deafening him. He takes his arms down when a black boot nudges his leg. Neil looks up, not sure who he has to thank for his rescue.

The man standing above him looks vaguely familiar. It’s only when he talks that Neil places him.

“You’re one lucky boy, Nathaniel,” his Uncle Stewart says.

Neil stares up at him until Stewart gest impatient and bends down to haul him up. He’s barefoot for some reason, and there’s blood everywhere, everything still hurts, but he can stand up. Stewart keeps an arm around his waist to keep him steady.

“Come on. There’s one last thing you need to do before we can leave.”

Stewart takes them over to the side of the room. There are several people in all black with visors over their faces. Neil sees Lola and Romero both dead in pools of blood. He swallows back bile at the sight. He’s seen enough dead people, lately. Stewart stops and directs Neil’s gaze to the body sprawled at their feet.

Nathan’s chest is going up and down quickly as he pants. There’s blood coming from his mouth and Neil can see a bleeding wound in his thigh and right shoulder. He looks up at Neil and Stewart and sneers.

“Think the boy can do it?” he asks, blood spraying.

Stewart presses something in Neil’s hand. It has the familiar shape and feel of a gun. Neil isn’t surprised when he looks at it. 

“It’s a son’s job to put down his father when he’s gone rabid,” Stewart says dispassionately. 

Neil looks down at his father, already slowly bleeding out. Even if he doesn’t shoot him, Nathan will die on this dirty floor with the bodies of his closest associates cooling just a few feet away.

Silently, Neil lifts the gun and levels it at Nathan.

Nathan grins. His teeth are red. “You’ll never be rid of me. I’ll always be inside you. I—”

One shot and a hole appears in Nathan’s head, between his wide-open eyes, a small trickle of blood sliding down his face. The gun’s kickback makes Neil’s hand ache even worse. He lowers it to his side and doesn’t object when Stewart takes it back.

“For Mary,” Stewart says quietly.

Neil agrees, but even more, it’s for himself. He doesn’t say that, though. He doesn’t think Stewart would understand.

“Come on. We need to get you to a hospital. My team will clean this up.” 

Stewart leads Neil away from Nathan’s body, away from Lola and Romero and the future his father was trying to create for him. There’s a black SUV waiting for them after they climb the stairs of the basement and they leave the derelict house. Stewart helps Neil into the passenger seat, then slides in behind the steering wheel himself. 

Neil is silent as they drive. He should be asking questions, but he honestly can’t think of a single one. All he can picture in his head is his father’s eyes open and staring at him, even in death.

“You’re lucky your rich little Alpha friend was able to contact me so quickly once you were taken,” Stewart finally says when they’ve been in the car for about half an hour. There are signs pointing towards Charleston that he’s following. “If he hadn’t called so quickly, we wouldn’t have gotten to you in time.”

He has no clue who Stewart is talking about. Neil doesn’t have any friends who should have Stewart’s direct phone number—no one should know Stewart even exists.

They pull up into the ER lane of a hospital before Neil can ask. Stewart hands him a large envelope.

“I would go in with you, but people would ask too many questions. Give them that. I have an appointment to see a Young Lord about an upstart who needs to be put down.” Stewart looks at Neil for the first time in a while. “I’m glad you’re not dead. Your friend has my number if you ever need me.”

Neil nods and gets out of the car. He watches it speed off. There are people outside of the hospital staring at him in horror. It’s not surprising—he’s covered in blood and he’s still not sure what all Lola did to him. He somehow manages to walk into the hospital, aware he’s leaving bloody footprints with every step.

The nurse at the counter looks up at him and then bolts up out of her seat when she gets a good look at him. “Oh my god—!”

“I think I need some help,” Neil says weakly. Then he collapses.

-

A steady beeping wakes Neil up sometime later. He’s tired of passing out and waking up in strange places, but at least this time he’s in a comfortable bed. He can’t feel anything really, but he assumes it’s comfortable because he’s not in any more pain. 

Neil opens his eyes and looks at the white ceiling tiles. They’re stark and everything is very bright after being in the basement and car and club for so long, but it’s better than the alternative. His eyes adjust and he looks to the side.

Unsurprisingly, Kevin and Andrew are in chairs next to his bed. Kevin stands up as soon as Neil looks at him.

“Neil!” he shouts. He’s pale and there are livid bruises around his throat. His lip looks raw like he’s been chewing on it for hours. “Neil.”

Neil looks at Andrew. There’s really nowhere else he wants to look.

Andrew is staring at him blankly, but his chair is pulled up close to the bed and his hand is twisted in Neil’s blanket. “You’re an idiot,” he says.

“Andrew!”

“I know.” He wasn’t really expecting anything less. His throat is still scratchy and raw but at least it doesn’t hurt. They obviously have him on the good drugs.

“Give me one good reason I shouldn’t finish the job your father started.” Andrew’s voice is shaking with rage and the smell fills the room, pushing out the sterile scent of everything else.

Neil searches Andrew’s gaze, sees more fear there than anger. “We still have a deal, don’t we?”

Andrew closes his eyes. 

“How did you know I was here?”

Kevin clears his throat. “Hatford called me after he dropped you off.”

Neil looks at the Alpha. “How the fuck did you have Uncle Stewart’s number?”

“I told you I was trying to get you out,” Kevin says. He sounds like he desperately wants Neil to believe him. “I got Stewart’s number through some contacts. He wanted revenge for your mother and he agreed to help me get you out. I told him when you came to the Court. He was the only person I could think of after you were taken and I saw the number. Stewart was already in the country when I called him. I don’t know why. He said he’d take care of everything.”

The information is too much for Neil. Andrew must smell that, because he says, “get out, Day.”

“But—”

“I’m not asking.”

Kevin leaves with one last lingering look and it’s just the two of them in the hospital room. Neil is sure they should inform a doctor or nurse that he’s up, but he doesn’t care. Andrew opens his eyes again and Neil feels like he’s drowning in them.

“Your father is dead,” Andrew says.

Neil lifts his bandaged hand and lets two fingers hover over Andrew’s face, between his eyes. “Yes.”

Andrew opens his mouth to reply, but they’re interrupted by a phone beeping. Neil honestly can’t handle all the interruptions in his life. He’s so over it. Andrew digs the phone out of his pocket. It’s Neil’s. He opens the text and studies it for a long time before holding it out for Neil to see.

There’s a picture. It’s graphic. Riko’s face, or what’s left of it. There’s a bullet hole on one temple and the other is just…gone. His eyes are wide in death, unseeing. Neil is so tired of seeing that, again and again.

The message attached is simple:

_Apologies for the delay. I_

Neil knows who it’s from. It might be an apology, even if it’s not an explanation. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever get one. If it actually matters.

Andrew puts the phone away. He reaches out, both hands hovering over Neil’s cheeks.

“Yes,” Neil whispers.

His hands cradle Neil’s ruined cheeks. The touch doesn’t hurt, even though he knows it should. The drugs have left him too numb. Andrew still holds Neil like he’s fragile, like his touch could hurt. It’s not possible.

He has no clue what he looks like, under the bandages. He doesn’t know if Andrew will be attracted to what’s there, if he’ll still want Neil. He wouldn’t blame Andrew if the answer is no. He’s probably uglier than ever, and he’s betrayed Andrew in ways he never should have. The beeping from the monitor starts to kick up as Neil starts to panic.

“I’m sorry,” Neil says. “I should have told you who I was. I should have been honest. I didn’t—”

“Shut up,” Andrew tells him. “Nathaniel Wesninski died in a filthy basement next to his father.” He leans down until his forehead is pressed against Neil’s. “I don’t care who you were. I don’t care what you didn’t tell me. None of that matters. You’re Neil Josten. That’s it.”

Neil closes his eyes and breathes in Andrew’s calming scent and thinks, yeah.

That’s it.


End file.
